Single parent dating.

jevs

Boring Poster
Joined
Nov 20, 2013
I've gotta start by saying I'm sorry to all of you who've had your heart broken by someone because it sucks but the best thing we can do is forgive, move on, and do the best we can. Some days are easier then others and some days just flat out suck but that's what makes life worth living.

I've been divorced for about 5-6 years now and separated for longer. I've tried online dating which has been really not worth doing. I'm friends with one person and went on a few other dates. Typically I meet them and I'm not interested in perusing it farther or I message a person and don't get a response back. Apparently most women online here don't like dads with 50/50 custody and who like wrestling and football and love all things Disney. I have a full-time job and kids. Oh well, their loss. I've stopped trying to do the online thing.

I did date someone I met at work for a couple years and introduced her to my kids, 13 and 9, and while she got along with my highly functioning autistic younger daughter she completely clashed with my oldest. Personalities just didn't jive. I tried making it work but there were other issues and it just wasn't going to so I finally ended it and haven't spoken since. The last straw was when I took her on a vacation, paid for everything, and she did nothing but complain the whole time.

While I'd like to and am open to finding someone I think I'm just going to concentrate on my kids for now. They're getting older and we all want to travel more so in addition to paying off the last of my bills that's where I will be spending my time and money. It should be fun. If somewhere, sometime, something happens I hope to be ready to take advantage of if. My kids and I are going with my sister's family to WDW starting 9/30 for 8 days and We're all excited. Say hi if you're there. Should be fun.

Well that was therapeutic. Weird.
Travel is a wonderful way of spending time and money :)
 

jmbarnes101

Mouseketeer
Joined
Apr 1, 2016
I'd like to do an adult only Disney's Hilton Head Resort trip next year and I've started planning a family summer camping vacation to the Black Hills, Badlands, Custer State Park area and maybe a longer one and add Yellowstone as well. I'm hoping we can see Twinkletoes and the Yellowstone Cubs.
 


sdjen

DIS Veteran
Joined
Feb 27, 2009
I'd like to do an adult only Disney's Hilton Head Resort trip next year and I've started planning a family summer camping vacation to the Black Hills, Badlands, Custer State Park area and maybe a longer one and add Yellowstone as well. I'm hoping we can see Twinkletoes and the Yellowstone Cubs.
I happen to live in the Black Hills and wanted to offer my help if you need any information in your planning. I would be happy to help!
 
  • kp_plus3

    Earning My Ears
    Joined
    May 6, 2017
    I actually had worse luck with people friends tried to set me up with. Most setups I had absolutely nothing in common with the guy. I think my friends' only criteria was "he's single." At least with online dating, I only accepted dates with people I had something in common with.
    Ha!!! the set ups have been the worst!!! Literally I have had terrible situations come out of those. I will be 40 this year, and I prefer to be single. Don't get me wrong men are great, I just think the ones that under my radar are all bad for me. It will be 6 years since their dad passed, and my kids just don't take well to something different. I have a 17, 12 and 6 year old, and I don't really even have the time to date someone, and I feel like the ones that have gotten my time in the last few years were a waste, and that took away from my kids.
     

    griergirl2

    Having entirely too much fun!!
    Joined
    Feb 16, 2009
    I do a lot of meet-ups. That’s where I met the guy I’m seeing now. It’s all complicated but somehow we are making it work.
     
  • KenHutch

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Jul 7, 2005
    When my daughters mother 1st started dating the man who would become her stepfather she came home and told me no dating you don't need women (she was 5). So no dating, the funny thing is she is 17 now and told me I needed a girlfriend in the worst way. LOL I think I get on her nerves sometimes with my questions on WHAT she is doing.
     

    MomOfDisneyPrincess

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Dec 23, 2017
    Such an interesting topic! I separated from my ex in 2013 and divorced him in 2014. So, I have been a single mom for 5 years, but it feels like I have been a single parent for at least 10. The last half of my marriage was horrible with a man who wouldn't work, didn't help around the house and even though he was unemployed for about 6 years, I still had to pay full-time daycare so I could work.

    I have no interest in dating. Having felt so oppressed during my marriage, I refuse to get back into that. Instead of being protected by marriage, I was trapped by it. Nothing I said or did could convince him to get a job and help with our living expenses. Even with the burden of medical expenses due to cancer treatments, above our normal expenses, he never felt the pressure to get a job. The last straw came when I had another cancer scare and needed an emergency surgery and was off work for 5 weeks. It took my last dollar in savings just to make the house payment. It got to the point that he couldn't even be nice and was yelling at me or DD most nights of the week. I finally caught him cheating on me and and I divorced him with a clear conscience.

    I clearly chose poorly the first time, so why gamble like that again? Life is really wonderful with just the two of us and we are very happy. My DD11 is fine with us being a family of two, but sometimes mentions the idea of me dating. She made me pinky promise that she gets to approve the next man I marry. I made that promise and really have no intention of getting involved with anyone until she is off at college. I think I'd like a really good guy friend and forget all the other relationship stuff. At 51, I think I'll be meeting widowers at the nursing home by the time I'm ready to date!
     

    dvcterry

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Jul 14, 2010
    Such an interesting topic! I separated from my ex in 2013 and divorced him in 2014. So, I have been a single mom for 5 years, but it feels like I have been a single parent for at least 10. The last half of my marriage was horrible with a man who wouldn't work, didn't help around the house and even though he was unemployed for about 6 years, I still had to pay full-time daycare so I could work.

    I have no interest in dating. Having felt so oppressed during my marriage, I refuse to get back into that. Instead of being protected by marriage, I was trapped by it. Nothing I said or did could convince him to get a job and help with our living expenses. Even with the burden of medical expenses due to cancer treatments, above our normal expenses, he never felt the pressure to get a job. The last straw came when I had another cancer scare and needed an emergency surgery and was off work for 5 weeks. It took my last dollar in savings just to make the house payment. It got to the point that he couldn't even be nice and was yelling at me or DD most nights of the week. I finally caught him cheating on me and and I divorced him with a clear conscience.

    I clearly chose poorly the first time, so why gamble like that again? Life is really wonderful with just the two of us and we are very happy. My DD11 is fine with us being a family of two, but sometimes mentions the idea of me dating. She made me pinky promise that she gets to approve the next man I marry. I made that promise and really have no intention of getting involved with anyone until she is off at college. I think I'd like a really good guy friend and forget all the other relationship stuff. At 51, I think I'll be meeting widowers at the nursing home by the time I'm ready to date!
    I love your story. And you should be proud. Single mom here and it is not easy, but an absolute blessing
     
  • Beprepared

    Earning My Ears
    Joined
    Mar 21, 2018
    Coming up on 6 years single for me. I rarely come across single men my age anyway, most are married or too young. Plus, I have sole custody so I don't have any free nights without getting a sitter. And anytime I do happen get a few hours to myself, I just want to be alone!

    I just figure it's not the season for dating for me, maybe one day when the kids are grown. I can't even imagine what it would be like to have another person wanting my attention anyway! So for now I'm doing my best as a single mom, and fitting in as many Disney trips as possible!
     

    Christiecsr

    Earning My Ears
    Joined
    Jan 18, 2020
    Momofadisneyprincess your ex sounds like mine!

    I would like a relationship...maybe with another dvc owner lol but not willing to settle again!

    My daughter is 8 at the moment we love going just us but it can be hard! Would love to meet up with others!
     

    msjessey

    Earning My Ears
    Joined
    Aug 1, 2013
    I'm going to Disney World with my daughter the first week of June. She will be 11 at the time. I think it would be fun to meet up with others similarly situated if the timing works out. We love Disney!
     

    Diana or Di

    And always let your conscience be your guide!
    Joined
    Apr 5, 2016
    I tried dating about a year after my divorce. I put a lot of effort into it for about two years and got really tired of the BS. I was on a couple online dating sites. I met a lot of jerks. I met a few really nice guys that were just not in a good mental space after their divorce. But I just never found the someone that stuck long term. My daughter has autism. She's very high functioning but demands a lot of my time. I would wait until I got to know the guy somewhat well before I'd share this about her. One guy that I thought was really special completely stopped communicating with me after I shared it. Another told me we could continue to date casually but that our relationship would never progress to something permanent because he didn't want to take that on. And so I finally decided it wasn't worth my time to date. It's been seven years since I've been on a date and I'm fine with that.
    I'm in a similar spot, only I haven't even bothered to try. I have three kids, all three have various needs, and between working full time, parenting three kids, and I also go to school, any down time I get is JEALOUSLY guarded and kept to myself. I have nothing to share with or give to anyone else.
     

    Diana or Di

    And always let your conscience be your guide!
    Joined
    Apr 5, 2016
    Coming up on 6 years single for me. I rarely come across single men my age anyway, most are married or too young. Plus, I have sole custody so I don't have any free nights without getting a sitter. And anytime I do happen get a few hours to myself, I just want to be alone!

    I just figure it's not the season for dating for me, maybe one day when the kids are grown. I can't even imagine what it would be like to have another person wanting my attention anyway! So for now I'm doing my best as a single mom, and fitting in as many Disney trips as possible!
    YASSSSSS THIS!!!
     





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