roomate help

What would you guys include in a roomate contract with someone whos controlling and has temper issues? my bfriend and I are getting a place together in june.

If he's controlling and has anger management issues, 1- why are you planning on living with him, and 2- why are you dating him?
 
yea she would, She and I have been freinds 10 years and I can handle things. THE behavior is not why I want to do a contract. I Want to do a contract because Im not stupid. have you guys ever wacthed judge judy about roomates that start as freinds and end up in court? Im not gonna be that but if for some reason if it would happen I want things spelled out.

If he's controlling and has anger management issues, 1- why are you planning on living with him, and 2- why are you dating him?

Um, "he" is a she.

-- Rob
 
what am i missing?


Roommate Contract
We have signed a lease/rental agreement for _____on this________ of ________ of 2007. We hope to make certain that all roommates will share all responsibilities of renting equally. Therefore we have prepared and are signing this document.
Roommates:
The Roommates sharing the address above are:

From this point on:
_______________ will be referred to as roommate one.
________________ will be referred to as roommate two.

Terms:
This agreement shall remain in effect till the end of the lease with the landlord.
If for any reason a roommate would move out before the date shown, under the lease agreement, the departing roommate will be held responsible until a replacement is found. If a substitute roommate is found, the remaining roommate(s) must approve him/her. The departing roommate should notify the landlord as well as the other roommates within 30 days so that proper arrangements can be made for legal vacating of the rented property. The roommate who is leaving is still obligated to the landlord by the terms of the lease.
Deposit:
Roommate 1 has paid________ for the security deposit. Roommate 2 has paid ______for the security deposit. Roommate two has also paid __________ for a pet deposit. Each roommate will receive her portion from the landlord at the end of tenancy. Each roommate is responsible for their share of the charges associated with damages unless it can be proven that the damages have been caused by the pets.
Rent:
Each roommate shall pay the following amount of rent:
Roommate 1:
Roommate 2:
The rent shall be paid by the correct due date of each month. If one roommate is late on the rent, they will be solely responsible for paying any late fee the landlord imposes.
The fallowing items are considerd to be basic rights of each roomate:
The right to read and study free from noise and distractions.
The right to sleep without undue disturbance from noise.
The right to personal space.
The right to a clean environment.
The right to free access to the main areas of the house including: the bathroom,the living room, and the kitchen.
The right to privacy.
The right to have guests as long as they fallow the set rules.
The right to confront the situation in a CALM rational manner.
Pets:
If pets are permitted under the lease, each pet owner shall be responsible for all damages caused by her pet. This includes damage to furniture, carpeting, doors, lawn and garden. The pet owner will be responsible for all upkeep and care of said pets.
The fallowing pets are agreed to be in the house:



Household Supplies:
The supplies include such things as paper towels, toilet paper, soap, cleaning supplies, dish detergent, foil, plastic trash bags, and any other goods needed for the home which will be shared by ALL roommates. Feminine products, deodorant, shampoo, toothpaste, conditioner and other personal consumables will be paid for by the roommate that is using said product. These products will not be used by other roommates or guests without prior permission.

Kitchen Use and Clean-Up
All roommates shall share food expenses evenly. Preparation of meals shall occur by whoever has time. Clean- up shall be by the person using the items. Dishes shall be put in the dishwasher or sink. Roommate one will be responsible for washing the dishes and see to them being put away.

Utilities:
Each roommate has the responsibility of paying half of the total utility bills. This should be done in a timely manner so the bill may be paid before the due date. Roommate two will determine the amount owed by each roommate, collect the amount, and pay the payment before the due date. Roommate two will give the other roommates at least four days notice of how much they owe before the bill is due. Roommate 2 will be responsible for seeing that the bill is either taken to or sent to the proper place before the due date. If the bill is late because said roommate forgets or otherwise, said roommate is responsible for any late fees. If the bill is late because the other roommates turned in there money late, they will pay the fees as enforced by the utility company.
Each roommate has the responsibility of paying half of the total Time Warner Cable Service Bill. This should be done in a timely manner so the bill may be paid before the due date. Roommate one will determine the amount owed by each roommate, collect the amount, and pay the payment before the due date. Roommate one will give the other roommates at least four days notice of how much they owe before the bill is due. Roommate 1 will be responsible for seeing that the bill is either taken to or sent to the proper place before the due date. If the bill is late because said roommate forgets or otherwise, said roommate is responsible for any late fees. If the bill is late because the other roommates turned in there money late, they will pay the fees as enforced by the utility company.
Other Areas of Agreement :
Roommate one will do all laundry and laundry related chores. Roommate two will do all the dishes and putting away of clean dishes.


Personal Property:
All roommates agree to refrain from borrowing roommate’s personal goods, without prior approval. Exceptions to this should be clearly stated, with the roommate’s reserving the right to change their minds about the sharing of items. If damage is done to personal property, the roommate responsible for the damage will be held liable.
Anything in a roommates room will be considered personal property and is NOT to be borrowed without prior permission. This also applies to cd’s, dvds and movies.

Use of stereos and CD’s Electrical Equipment Use:
The electronic equipment in the living room will be free to be used by all roommates. Care is expected to be taken to protect this equipment from breaking. If broken, roommates will discuss what to do in regards to repair or replacement. Cd’s will be the property of there owner. If they are in the living room any roommate may use them. Use of these cd’s will be with the express understanding that when an item is to be put back in its case when the roommate is done using it. The roommate will also be responsible for putting it back where it was found. These same rules will apply to movies and dvds. Each roommate will be responsible for keeping track of what items are theirs and what is missing. If an item is missing, the roommates will sit and discuss this and come to a solution.

Cleaning and Yard Work:
Roommate one will clean the bathroom, and kitchen. Roommate two will clean the living room and vacuum. These chores will switch monthly.
Garbage will be a shared responsibility. Roommate one will take the garbage out
the first and third weeks of the month. Roommate two will take the garbage out the second and fourth weeks of the month.
All other chores will be discussed and divided.
Additional terms and agreements:
Use of tobacco, alcohol and drugs
Smoking will not be permitted in the premises. Guests who smoke will be asked to do so outside as to the fact that the smell lingers in all fabrics.
Illegal drug use will be ground for termination of this agreement. This will also be grounds for other roommates to ask the user to please leave. This will not terminate the lease with the landlord.
Alcohol will be allowed as long as all parties drinking are of age and not drunk.
Keys
Each party will be allowed to give a key to their mother for emergencies.
Phone Calls
The ability to make and receive phone calls is very important. To avoid problems with the use of the phone, the following is agreed upon:
Phone calls will be limited to 20 minutes when another roommate is waiting for the phone.

Messages will be taken with the best care possible. The roommate taking the message should take care to capture all details and take down all numbers. The said roommate should post these messages in the fallowing location:
__________________________________________________
Quiet hours for studying and sleeping
Quiet hours will be observed from ________pm to ___________am. Duren this time TV volume must be on low. Music must be listened to with headphones and talking must be done quietly. Phone calls coming in during this time period should be emergency or very important calls only.
Behavior of guests
Non-paying visitors/guests may not be in the house when the bill paying roommate is gone unless it’s a family member or close friend that both roommates know. If this clause is broken the roommate who let the guest in will be responsible for stolen property.
Guest are expected to behave within the rules and with good taste. Any damage they cause will be there sole responsibility. Each roommate shall not have more guests over at one time than they can handle and keep tract of.
Overnight guests
Guests will be allowed at reasonable times. Overnight guests and parties will be allowed as long as both parties have notice. The roommate who invited the guest will be responsible for their behavior and actions. The roommate who invited the guest will also be responsible for cleaning up after that guest. Guests will be responsible for any damage they cause.
Conflict resolution:
In the case of a conflict, each party will talk about the matter in a calm, rational fashion. If this can’t be achieved at the time, each party will go to there bedrooms to cool down. After the calming down period, the matter will be discussed. If the situation is extreme or causing fear to either roommate one roommate will leave. If asked to leave the roommate is welcomed to come back once the situation has defused. No roommate will be denied the right to be in the apartment for more than a half hour. This will only happen in extreme circumstances.
Compliance with unit rules
All rules set forth in this contract shall be strictly fallowed. Additions to this agreement will be added on the bottom and ONLY become part of the agreement only if both parties sign and date it. Breaking these rules multiple times will lead to you being asked to leave. Multiple times will be considered more than 10 times. Warnings will be given. You will still be responsible for all of your financial oblations as per this contract.
 

Holy Crap, are you sure she is the 'controlling' one?

I understand your wish to make things as smooth as possible. But, your contract reads like a micromanaging nightmare. I especially like this:
In the case of a conflict, each party will talk about the matter in a calm, rational fashion.
Seriously, there is no way to control anyone (even yourself) to this point. Who determines 'rational', btw?

You are already determining that there will be problems with a few of your points, it comes across as antagonistic, for example:
Non-paying visitors/guests may not be in the house when the bill paying roommate is gone unless it’s a family member or close friend that both roommates know. If this clause is broken the roommate who let the guest in will be responsible for stolen property.
Guest are expected to behave within the rules and with good taste.

Basically, I read this as you having these specific problems with your bfriend already:

Don't really like or trust her family or friends
She will be disruptive/loud
She is unreasonable and won't discuss things rationally
She will not let you know if someone calls, or will not take messages properly
She is going to use without permission and/or steal your stuff
She will not pay her bills on time

(this is just the feeling I am getting from it as an outsider)


If I were you, I would stick to the very basics. It's not up to you to make the rules, you should both be coming together to come up with ideas for ground rules. Presenting this (as it stands) to your Bfriend is going to raise the hairs on the back of her neck, I guarantee it.

Honestly, if you really feel this will cause as many problems as you are obviously think will come up with this contract, you would be better off not sharing a dwelling with this person. Seriously.
 
Even though she is your best friend, contracts like that DO NOT work...period.
It is wishful thinking on YOUR part.

As far as "rent" being paid...that is between your landlord on YOU. It will depend on the contract you sign with the landlord, not what you write up.

If you know she will be "late" or not pay, what will you do? Cover it or get bad credit?
 
If you have to write up a contract that lengthy, why would you even consider getting a roommate? 20 minutes for phone calls when other roommate is waiting for the phone?!? Is this prison? Technically, if you both have cell phones, you don't even need a land line. Unless your utility company requires it. I had basic service on my land line for the two years my husband and I lived together before we got married.

When you were saying you wanted to draw up a contract, I was expecting it would be who paid what bills, and chore division. The rest of the stuff in your contract is common courtesy stuff that any reasonable person would know and not have to put in writing. In fact, the section you had about quiet hours was part of the lease agreement we signed with our leasing company when we had our apartment.

If you really feel you have to put that much in writing, you should think again about having a roommate at all. Why not save more money and wait until you can afford to live on your own?
 
He's controlling and has a temper? I wouldn't be getting a place with him! :moped:

::yes:: Good advice, if I were you, I'd think long and hard before moving in with her!

Oops! Just read the second page and skimmed over your contract. Holy cow! This contract reads like a pre-nuptial agreement! Are you serious? Maybe you should live by yourself and just get a cat....
 
yea she would, She and I have been freinds 10 years and I can handle things. THE behavior is not why I want to do a contract. I Want to do a contract because Im not stupid. have you guys ever wacthed judge judy about roomates that start as freinds and end up in court? Im not gonna be that but if for some reason if it would happen I want things spelled out.


First of all, if you're coming up with "what ifs" based on what you've seen on Judge Judy of all things, then that's really your biggest problem here. ;)

On top of that, I think the contract you've come up with is heavy handed and confrontational and there's no way I would ever agree to live with someone who handed me something like that. Especially a best friend!
 
What would you guys include in a roomate contract with someone whos controlling and has temper issues? my bfriend and I are getting a place together in june. I dont want to get stuck doing all the work so that should be coverd, bills, and so such. I have no clue what to put in a contract. help

No contract needed.

Just don't get a place together.

Sounds like there is not enough trust to expect common courtesy.
 
:eek: Yikes! Don't do it! You will ruin your friendship the minute you all sit down to sign that contract. :sad2: Wow!

I'm 30 and I've never lived under such strict conditions... not with my parents, not in a dorm, not with roommates, not on my own, and not with my husband. :rotfl: I know you want to protect yourself, and I don't blame you.

But I would try to find someone else to live with, and like other posters suggested, sit down and come up with a mutual, basic contract. :) You'll be much better off.
 
That's quite a contract you've got there!:eek: :eek: I don't think that there is a person on this planet that could adhere to it 100%. Just get a place by yourself!:thumbsup2
 
I couldn't even read that contract. My eyes glazed over. My advice: don't do it.
 
Dating him? SOrry im moving in with my BEST FEMALE FREIND


You should have said that in your first post then. Bfriend can mean best friend or boyfriend. Regardless, you shouldn't move in with her.
 
LMAO.......good luck getting anyone to sign that "contract"....:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
 
Sorry, I agree with this others. If you are truly concerned about these things, moving in is not a good idea.

If you insist, I read the first couple of paragraphs and the "contract" would do absolutely nothing to stand up in front of Judge Judy.

For instance, what is a "share" of the damages. Do you mean for instance -- Roomate A broke the mirror in the bathroom so she should pay for that? Do you mean, we each paid 50% of the security deposit so we are each liable for 50% of the damages -- etc etc etc

as for the rights....

What constitutes a quiet environment? Does that mean the tv and stereo cannot be on from the hours from 7pm to 9pm? Does it mean that anytime somebody wants to study, they can't be on at all...

It goes on and on. What exactly is "clean?" Do all dishes need to be washed immediately, or are we simply required to shovel a path from the kitchen to the bathroom once a week. How are you specifically going to determine if somebody is drunk?

As I said --- totally useless piece of paper.
 
No way would I sign that contract. Plus like TF already said most of it is open to interpretation, you're idea and my iea of clean may be two different things. I think you'd be best living alone.
 

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