Referring to people as Sir or Ma'am...

[Lovely2CU]

Just read the full transcript of the 911 call from Michael Jackson's home:



Is this common to use Sir/Ma'am all over the States, or just certain areas?

The last, and only time, I called someone Sir was in school, no Ma'ams though, not here in England, we had to say Mrs/Miss...last name!

 

[olena]

I was brought up to use it with my elders and with strangers, and I still do it. It kills me though when local young adults 'ma'am' me....

When I used it when I lived in Connecticut, it was just something else that earned me confused stares, so I'm not sure it's as customary there. That was just my experience though.

 

[AshleyW]

I'm not sure about the rest of the country, but.. I was raised in Iowa, although my mom's side of the family grew up in Tennessee, and I was taught to always say sir/ma'am/miss to those I didn't personally know. My fiance's family is from Mississippi, and they took it a step farther. He was raised to address adults that he knew as "Mr. First Name" or "Miss First Name".. his parents' best friends were Miss Rita and Mister Deon. I thought it was kind of unnecessary at first, but I've learned to appreciate the politeness.

 

[KristaTX]

As in, "Yes, sir" or "Yes, ma'am"? Yes, it is somewhat common (everywhere in the US, I think) and it is considered polite and respectful. It is especially used when speaking to some kind of authority figure (e.g. teacher, boss, policeman), but also between employees at a store or restaurant, and the patrons they are serving.

 

[Buckalew11]

I use it every day, to anyone, any age.

3yo to me, "Miss Brenda, will you help me make this chair go down?" "Yes, ma'am, I sure will."

Cashier to me, "Here's your change." Me to cashier, "Thank you sir, have a good day."

It is just how I talk.

 

[LuvCuteBoys]

I know it's meant to be a sign of respect, but it drives me NUTS! So does the instance of using "yes" instead of "yeah" and "no" instead of "nope".

Overexaggerated politeness is just plain annoying to me.

 

[KristaTX]

Saying "yes" and "no", vs. saying "yeah" and "nope" is over-exaggerated politeness ??

 

[Anjelica]

Military Brat here and this was ALWAYS used amongst military personnel AND generally the kids were taught to use that language as well (I say generally because I am sure there were a few who did not).

Off-topic but hence the reason I don't understand why B. Boxer was getting all upset with the Brig. General calling her ma'am - its a sign of respect and politness in the military. She needed to get over herself...

 

[bookgirl]

Common in Oklahoma, I was raised to say it to elders and to use it when I didn't know an adults name. So I said ma'am and sir to my family and teachers, and if I was speaking to someone older than me and I didn't know their name I used it.

What's funny is once I became an adult I stopped using it as much, I guess when I crossed from young adult (20s) to adult (30s) I became the ma'am I do still use it when I work with the senior population but if someones in my general age group (30s to 50s) I try not to, then it does seem a little goofy.

 

[Anjelica]

Saying "yes" and "no", vs. saying "yeah" and "nope" is over-exaggerated politeness ??

I can't stand it when my daughter, who is 6, would use "yeah". I always corrected her and said to say yes. One time I let "yeah" slip out in a conversation and she was the first to correct me.

I think Yeah is a "lazy" way of saying yes - but just my opinion and there is no merit in that...

 

[MichelleVW]

As in, "Yes, sir" or "Yes, ma'am"? Yes, it is somewhat common (everywhere in the US, I think) and it is considered polite and respectful. It is especially used when speaking to some kind of authority figure (e.g. teacher, boss, policeman), but also between employees at a store or restaurant, and the patrons they are serving.

I grew up in Cincinnati and it's not common there at all.

Military Brat here and this was ALWAYS used amongst military personnel AND generally the kids were taught to use that language as well (I say generally because I am sure there were a few who did not).

Off-topic but hence the reason I don't get with B. Boxer getting all upset with the Brig. General calling her ma'am - its a sign of respect and politness in the military. She needed to get over herself...

Retired Air Force here and since I never used sir/ma'am growing up I never taught my kids to use it. Now we moved to NC when the oldest was in 3rd grade and she picked up the habit of saying it then, but I never enforced it. She still uses it today but her sister doesn't.

Last year when we lived in North Dakota she had adults tell her "please don't call me ma'am" but she said "sorry, can't help it"

 

[terri01p]

I'm a grown women and I still say sir/ ma'ma, my child are grown and they do too.
I would rather hear a 911 tape like that then I would someone shouting and hollaring, I thinks it speaks well for the person.

 

[daisax]

As in, "Yes, sir" or "Yes, ma'am"? Yes, it is somewhat common (everywhere in the US, I think) and it is considered polite and respectful.

Not common at all in New England -- I'm 45 and have never heard it in common usage except on old television shows or in a military context. Even in the 70s it would have seemed as obscure a thing to say as "Yes, milord" or "Yes, milady."

I understand it's different elsewhere, of course.

 

[Piecey]

Military Brat here and this was ALWAYS used amongst military personnel AND generally the kids were taught to use that language as well (I say generally because I am sure there were a few who did not).

Along the same lines.... DH is a Marine Corps. Vet and he calls everyone "Sir"... He occasionally uses "Ma'am" but it's much less often.. every man is "Sir"

It drives my older brother a little nuts, as he's younger than my DH.

 

[georgina]

I've always thought it was a southern thing. No ma'am or sirs where I grew up in Ohio and PA.

 

[DawnCt1]

I was brought up to use it with my elders and with strangers, and I still do it. It kills me though when local young adults 'ma'am' me....

When I used it when I lived in Connecticut, it was just something else that earned me confused stares, so I'm not sure it's as customary there. That was just my experience though.

It isn't and its a shame. I don't think you will find it anywhere in the northeast. Not something we should be proud of.

 

[KristaTX]

Not common at all in New England -- I'm 45 and have never heard it in common usage except on old television shows or in a military context. Even in the 70s it would have seemed as obscure a thing to say as "Yes, milord" or "Yes, milady."

I understand it's different elsewhere, of course.

I'll have to add this to my list of many things learned on the DIS about other places in our country. Like the whole pop/soda/tonic/coke thing, the pronunciation of the word "lawyer", the abundance of the Catholics in the northeast, the submarine/grinder/hoagie sandwich thing, "bag" & "sack" not being synonyms some places, the prevalence of basements in other parts of the country, etc.

 

[Ladybugsy]

I also talked to my children this way from the time they were young. If they asked me a question, I said, "yes, ma'am" or "no ma'am". They are polite and respectful to everyone because this is the way they learned to talk. I can't tell you how many compliments I get on my children's manners. Be mannerly to them, and they will learn respect for other people. I don't think of manners as a way to "show off" or be superior...or even being from the south...it's just a way of letting other people know that you think they're significant. What's wrong with that?

 

[Handbag Lady]

We use sir and ma'am here in Los Angeles, especially if you are not introduced to whom you are speaking.

The tricky bit is the age thing. Sir is easy. All males are sir. Ma'am is usually used for women who are much older or much younger than yourself.

I would only call a colleague ma'am if I was being silly or extremely sincere. (As in, thanks, ma'am, you just pulled my butt out of a sling!)

 

[happygirl]

Yes, it a way to show respect.