Rediscovering Me


<font color=blue>Glad to see that you had a chance
Feb 19, 2005
It's been 10 years (almost to the day) since I last posted. Where has the time gone? No matter, I am here and ready to begin again.......and finish what I started 15 years ago. Originally, I began this journey in March of 2005 and was successful at losing about 42 lbs. My original journal was "Lesli's Live Long and Strong WISH Journal." and I was doing well and feeling great! Then life threw me a curveball when I had a very bad car accident which took well over a year to regain enough energy and strength to begin taking off the weight that had crept back on. So I started again with a new journal in 2007 called "Lesli's Changing Life at 40" which I kept going for about 3 years. It was definitely more challenging to get back to where I had been prior to the accident (and still wasn't at goal weight) and I think partially it took a toll on my psyche learning to accept that it was ok for things to take longer to readjust. Over the last 10 years, life has been full of stress for many reasons (good and bad) and focusing all of my energy on everyone and everything else but me. Not taking that time to care for myself has lead to weight gain beyond what I thought I would ever see and that too has played with the emotions. The good news is that I know I can fix it. I have done it before and no reason why I cannot do it again, even at 53. In fact, more of a reason to make my health a priority again. This time is to finish what I started. This time is for finding myself again!

For those who don't know me (hopefully there are a few of my WISH buddies still out there), I am a mother of 4: DD32, DD30, DD22, & DS17; with a DH who works way too much, but is supportive; and I'm a Mormor (grandmother) to 2 little ones. I do most of my work from home for our business (pros and cons), did ALOT of volunteer work until COVID-19 (now rethinking my focus), still trying to finish updates to our home, and plan to work on a new business venture soon, plus still have one kid to get through school. Definitely, a time when I need to get a good routine going to keep the sanity and to achieve my goals.

Currently, I weigh 255.8 lbs and plan to get to 150 as my overall goal weight. Looking back, on my first journey, I had gotten down to 186 just before the accident. My heaviest had been 230 which I had planned to never reach again. That started the second journey when I was 224.5 lbs so that I could avoid that reaching that high, but never made it back to Onederland although I did lose some. I have gone through all of the pain and guilt over the last few years as I watched the lbs mark new highs. Sometimes I was able to get down 10 pounds, but I didn't make it a true priority (because I put everything and everyone first), so it would creep back and then some. My overall highest was 264, not that long ago. I know that I can maintain weight for a long period of time. It's the lack of taking care of myself first when times get overly stressed that throw things off for me and add the weight (which I then maintain again, crazy I know). So to get back to a healthier me, I have to go through rediscovering who I am again.

The best choice I made on the first journey was to maintain my WISH journal. It keeps me accountable and allows for some time to reflect.

Currently, my goals are:
1. Lose 60 lbs by year end
2. Increase my water intake
3. Make conscious food choices
3. Increase my exercise

It's time to rediscover me!


<font color=blue>Glad to see that you had a chance
Feb 19, 2005
Woohoo! Down .6 lbs. Sounds small, but I will take it and own it. Only less than a pound to go and I hit a mark that I have been trying to reach for a year. :-)

Yesterday I spent too much time trying to stay on top of the current news. Good in terms of knowing how to plan for business, not so good since it can eat up much of my day. But I did take care of a few other things, but not exactly what I had planned, so I must work on that.

Water was up significantly and food choices were made with thought or at least awareness. Oh and I have stopped eating after 8pm for the past few days. I think I ate late due to stress, boredom, or just not wanting to think about that I didn't feel I had time to contemplate on.

I noticed that my mindset is more determined and looking for all the positives that will come from changing my lifestyle right now. It also helps that DD32 has also started her own journey recently to get into shape and DS17 is working on building good habits that will take him through life. He doesn't have much to worry about in terms of weight, but he likes to be active and wants his food habits to accommodate that lifestyle. So at least I don't feel like I am in this alone. (I have noticed that no one posts to journals anymore. How sad.)

Food yesterday:
Breakfast: 2 soft boiled eggs, 1 banana, cup of tea, 4 oz oj
AM snack: none
Lunch: 2 fatayr (small meat pies), couscous w/ veggies, 1 piece baklava, 12 oz iced tea
PM snack: serving of pretzels w/ PB
Supper: large salad, with chicken and parmesan
Later: 1 piece of baklava (I know I shouldn't, but I made it the other day and doesn't happen often.), 12 oz iced tea

Water: 84 oz

Goals for day:
1. Continue increased water intake
2. Continue being aware of all food, thinking about whether I am truly hungry
3. Work on planning a daily routine.

Everyone have a great day!


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