Principal 'paddling' first grader for damaging computer

[monsterkitty]

That did occur to me, which is why it became even more puzzling the mom's lack of response but large response after the fact.


I would have thought that if she had kept quiet about the entire incident. When you're trying to stay under the radar, if you're really that concerned (and I get it, we have that issue here and right now it's with getting minorities to get vaccinated) you do NOT typically draw attention to yourself. That's usually the last thing you do. Now she's national news. Doesn't get any more public than that.

___________
I don't want it to seem like I'm not horrified by the video because I am and the principal and colleague should have repercussions, but the voice we're hearing is from the mom and I'm just not certain all that transpired or why it transpired is being told here. Something just doesn't sit right for me beyond what most of us already feel which is no way in heck should this have happened.

I partially agree. She wants to stay under the radar but this has forced her into the public scrutiny. Two years ago I had a student who left his school flute in the car. The car was broken into and the flute was stolen. It took him 2 weeks to finally admit he wasn't forgetting his flute, but what had happened. Mom didn't report it stolen because she was afraid that her status would become known.

However, if mom had retaliated right there, the principal would have had her arrested. That would be an immediate consequence because she is undocumented and was charges with a crime. If she even made it to trial she would never be able to become documented because of the charges, even if she was found innocent. Any type of charges make in incredibly difficult to get documentation or even citizenship.

Mom was in a no win situation.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I partially agree. She wants to stay under the radar but this has forced her into the public scrutiny. Two years ago I had a student who left his school flute in the car. The car was broken into and the flute was stolen. It took him 2 weeks to finally admit he wasn't forgetting his flute, but what had happened. Mom didn't report it stolen because she was afraid that her status would become known.

However, if mom had retaliated right there, the principal would have had her arrested. That would be an immediate consequence because she is undocumented and was charges with a crime. If she even made it to trial she would never be able to become documented because of the charges, even if she was found innocent. Any type of charges make in incredibly difficult to get documentation or even citizenship.

Mom was in a no win situation.

But was she forced into public scrutiny? And can we say what the principal would have done right then and there? And what would she be arrested on? The police don't take in undocumented people as far as I know just on the basis of them being undocumented. That's an immigration enforcement. I can understand that being the fear but she also took on the huge risk of making this all public. I wouldn't want the mom to be physical so I'm not sure what charges would the principal say she should have against her, I was just saying in one of my comments I didn't hear any protest, it just felt off to me. I've wondered what recourse would the principal have if the mom just walked out with her daughter. Considering what the principal did was not legal calling the police on the mom for failing to allow the school to administer an illegal punishment doesn't sound like a good plan though obviously the principal isn't above actually doing the illegal act but that was without law enforcement right there.

In a weird twist having this recording to me actually makes me have more questions about what transpired than if there had been no video. I think I would have taken the mom's word on what happened and not really questioned much of anything.

How was this video released? Wouldn't that be something you share with just your attorney and presumably with the school board? You bring up the point about charges against her and impacts should she seek to be legal but it's incredibly risky to make this all public and it doesn't shield her should it become an immigration issue.

I'm not doubting that there can be a concern about someone's legal status. In my area that's why minorities didn't want to get a covid test, they aren't wanting the vaccine as much as others. We know that's often why workers put up with things because they are concerned about their legal status and don't want to tell anyone, it's often why they don't even get involved in legal matters. But there is something for me that is just not adding up and I'm not sure how much her documented status really has on her actions at the time. My internal bells say this is more of a personal issue between the two adults with the poor child thrust into the middle of this when she shouldn't be but I almost hope I'm wrong and it's just about an adult who has no business being in a position of authority. Regardless the principal shouldn't be allowed to be in education anymore though IMO.

 

[EveDallas]

I'm sorry...but how does someone freeze, yet have the ability to get out a phone and start recording their child being abused like that? Language barrier or not, at what point do you step in and defend your child from physical harm, and at what point do you just let it happen? Why is it okay to record it and release the recording, but not stop it when it's happening? I get being concerned over your status in this country, but not defending a 6 year old from this?
That's what I don't get...how do you 'freeze' - implying that you were afraid and/or unable to do anything in that moment - yet get out your phone to record it and watch it happen?

This was my thought. You were frozen in fear and yet managed to pull out your phone and hit record? Forget that and protect your child. I would have jumped right in front of my child and told the principal to hit me if she was brave enough.

 

[low-key]

I would of got my *** whipped and when my dad found out it would get whipped again

 

[EveDallas]

Yeah, I’m right there with you. She’s scared because she’s undocumented but she went to a lawyer anyway? Seems to me that this is going to be a big payday for her. She says she wanted people to know “what’s going on” at the school. People say it would have been her word against the principal’s if the paddling hadn’t actually happened. No. Just NO. I think she could have filmed herself arguing with the principal after the principal told her what was going to happen. Heck, she could have “allowed” one hit and then jumped in to stop it. She just sat there and filmed the whole thing! Sorry, but that’s just wrong.

Yeah, I'm probably just a cynical so-and-so, but after viewing this I can't shake the feeling that mom sees a big payday in her future.

 

[EveDallas]

Also, the mom is probably more terrified knowing what will happen to her as an undocumented person if she's arrested. Knowing that she would lose her child if she gets arrested and possibly deported for interfering is a bigger fear than watching her child get beaten.

She had to weigh what was better and worse for her child - getting hit with a plank or possibly losing her mother.

But she went to the media?

 

[usnuzuloose]

Why didn't the mother stop it instead of filming it?

 

[AndreaA]

I’ll say again - if the mother had stepped in and stopped this, she wouldn’t have cause for a lawsuit which will likely net her THOUSANDS of dollars.

She was NOT afraid because of her immigration status. First, she said that she started to record and the principal told her to put away the phone which is why she filmed it secretly. Why didn’t she walk out at that point? She didn’t say that the principal threatened to call ICE on her if she kept recording. If she was so scared about her status being made public then she wouldn’t have gone to a lawyer, for crying out loud. No doubt that lawyer ALSO sees many dollar signs in his future as part of his cut.

Oh, and don’t get me started on how she made this video public... a completely unnecessary step and clearly designed to drum up tons of support so that the school system will be forced to pony up.

I just don’t understand how anyone can defend the mother who just filmed all of this. Good grief.

 

[usnuzuloose]

I’ll say again - if the mother had stepped in and stopped this, she wouldn’t have cause for a lawsuit which will likely net her THOUSANDS of dollars.

She was NOT afraid because of her immigration status. First, she said that she started to record and the principal told her to put away the phone which is why she filmed it secretly. Why didn’t she walk out at that point? She didn’t say that the principal threatened to call ICE on her if she kept recording. If she was so scared about her status being made public then she wouldn’t have gone to a lawyer, for crying out loud. No doubt that lawyer ALSO sees many dollar signs in his future as part of his cut.

I just don’t understand how anyone can defend the mother who just filmed all of this. Good grief.

I do not defend her, I am wondering why she couldn't be charged

 

[ronandannette]

So how come some of y'all are putting the mom at fault? Do you think she should have taken the paddle and beaten the principal unconscious?

Of course not but how about something basic and instinctual like snatching your child up in your arms and shielding her? I wouldn't have considered attacking the principal but she would have had to go through me to get at my kid.

Even if people did turn out "fine", the question I always have is what did the spanking accomplish? What value did it add to you developing into an independent, successful, well-adjusted adult? If there's no purpose or benefit to doing something, you don't just continue to do it because you think it doesn't cause any harm.

You may be asking rhetorically but I'd like to give you a sincere answer anyway. I am not speaking for anyone's experience except my own nor am I endorsing or condemning spanking by parents. I was a child in the 70's and spankings as discipline was pretty much a standard in our culture. I was very, very rarely spanked as a kid, so rarely that I remember most of the ones I ever got. It was a last-ditch approach done only for the very most egregious behaviour (by my parent's standards). The intention was to convey an absolutely non-negotiable standard of conduct - an absolute line in the sand that made it clear whatever the behaviour was simply would not be tolerated. A behavioral deterrent of the bluntest and most decisive kind and even as a very small child it made the message clear and did correct me. Would something else have worked as well? Impossible to know but I certainly don't fault my parents for having done it nor am I scarred in any way.

 

[usnuzuloose]

Of course not but how about something basic and instinctual like snatching your child up in your arms and shielding her? I wouldn't have considered attacking the principal but she would have had to go through me to get at my kid.

You may be asking rhetorically but I'd like to give you a sincere answer anyway. I am not speaking for anyone's experience except my own nor am I endorsing or condemning spanking by parents. I was a child in the 70's and spankings as discipline was pretty much a standard in our culture. I was very, very rarely spanked as a kid, so rarely that I remember most of the ones I ever got. It was a last-ditch approach done only for the very most egregious behaviour (by my parent's standards). The intention was to convey an absolutely non-negotiable standard of conduct - an absolute line in the sand that made it clear whatever the behaviour was simply would not be tolerated. A behavioral deterrent of the bluntest and most decisive kind and even as a very small child it made the message clear and did correct me. Would something else have worked as well? Impossible to know but I certainly don't fault my parents for having done it nor am I scarred in any way.

Such a big difference between beating and discipline. A child was never scarred by a few swats. It's when you are leaving bruising or marks that's when abuse comes in.

 

[penn19]

Didn’t we just have a thread about recording someone else without consent? Although I guess the Principal knew? But is that still considered consent?

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Such a big difference between beating and discipline. A child was never scarred by a few swats. It's when you are leaving bruising or marks that's when abuse comes in.

Thin line exists between the two though. A belt across the butt or back but no marks to be seen every time you act up. Still just discipline? Slap across the face but no marks seen every time you act up. Still just discipline?

The old way of looking at things was "it didn't leave a physical mark, it's fine". New way of looking at it is not just using marks as a defining line and seeing it as "a few swats" and a few swats doesn't just mean the same to everyone.

I think these days we try to find different ways to correct behavior.

 

[usnuzuloose]

Thin line exists between the two though. A belt across the butt or back but no marks to be seen every time you act up. Still just discipline? Slap across the face but no marks seen every time you act up. Still just discipline?

The old way of looking at things was "it didn't leave a physical mark, it's fine". New way of looking at it is not just using marks as a defining line and seeing it as "a few swats" and a few swats doesn't just mean the same to everyone.

I am talking about swat with pants up nothing more

 

[DLgal]

I am talking about swat with pants up nothing more

At the end of the day, hitting kids is lazy. Put in some actual effort into getting the behavior you would like to see, rather than just swatting endlessly at a young kid who can't defend himself against an adult. Bottom line, people hit kids to inflict pain. That is mean and abusive. No way to sugar coat it.

 

[usnuzuloose]

At the end of the day, hitting kids is lazy. Put in some actual effort into getting the behavior you would like to see, rather than just swatting endlessly at a young kid who can't defend himself against an adult. Bottom line, people hit kids to inflict pain. That is mean and abusive. No way to sugar coat it.

At the end of the day, hitting kids is lazy. Put in some actual effort into getting the behavior you would like to see, rather than just swatting endlessly at a young kid who can't defend himself against an adult. Bottom line, people hit kids to inflict pain. That is mean and abusive. No way to sugar coat it.

Everyone is taking this out of comtext. I never spanked my children all the time. It worked also with time outs. So everyone stop freaking about my opinion

 

[Disneytrippin']

When I was a kid the threat of the principal paddling you was what kept you in line. Having said that, one time I was accused of not returning a library book. I was threatened with a paddle. My mom found out and poop hit the fan. She was soooo angry and said you will not lay a finger on my daughter. It was a long while after that she got a call. They found the book that I supposedly never returned. Jerks.

 

[Disneytrippin']

Thin line exists between the two though. A belt across the butt or back but no marks to be seen every time you act up. Still just discipline? Slap across the face but no marks seen every time you act up. Still just discipline?

The old way of looking at things was "it didn't leave a physical mark, it's fine". New way of looking at it is not just using marks as a defining line and seeing it as "a few swats" and a few swats doesn't just mean the same to everyone.

I think these days we try to find different ways to correct behavior.

Yes. And how's that working in society now. Not to good I would say.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I am talking about swat with pants up nothing more

I'm responding to your post where you said "It's when you are leaving bruising or marks that's when abuse comes in." that's an old school way of thinking (one of which I was raised under even in the 90s) that it's virtually harmless to the child because it didn't leave a mark, it's only disciplining the child, it's not abuse, it's not beating, just straight up discipline. These days people do tend to look at it in a multi-faceted way such that what most would consider spanking as largely ineffective, pants up or not, just a swat or not.

Everyone is taking this out of comtext. I never spanked my children all the time. It worked also with time outs. So everyone stop freaking about my opinion

Most of the time when the topic is discussed in terms of a repeated method to gain the child's compliance not a random one off. I'm not freaking out about your opinion, just explaining. You see it in a certain lens that pants up, swat no biggie and maybe you're just talking about a one off versus part of a parent's go to's. I'm just saying these days the conversation gets discussed in a more complex way seen in a more complex way. But I can understand where you're coming from.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Yes. And how's that working in society now. Not to good I would say.

Which part? The part where we try to find different ways to correct behavior?