I was thinking about e-mailing Sandcass, but I don't want to be a pest, but maybe she would like that. Maybe if I sent a short e-mail telling her that I was thinking of her would be ok. I really don't think that she's lurking--she had an agreement with her DH that she wouldn't even read the DIS, even occasionally. Too bad--she's a nice lady!
Can't say that I understand it, but I don't understand my own husband right now, so I guess it's not surprising that I don't understand someone elses husband or their relationship.