OP here. I have read Dave Ramsey, and actually we paid off our van almost 2 years early and the only CC debt we have is what we just put on this spring for our new furnace (will be paid off very soon). We paid for my DHs used truck with cash. We live in a very modest (small/older) home, neither DH nor I ever get new clothes, I try to buy everything for my DDs at garage sales, I cloth diaper to save money, we don't have fancy cable/cell phones/TVs/computers/etc. We don't go out to eat that often and when we do it is always a place where we have coupons. I believe we are very good with our money. I did have a PT job when my DH got out of work but I was downsized due to the economy. I would watch a little person or so but right now there is no one around me that I can watch!
Vacations are the only thing I/we splurge on. We NEVER go in debt on our vacations - cash only! It was a girls only very budget trip to WDW, and that was paid for with gift money from my dad that I had been saving for for years and with gift money for them. I know it is against Dave Ramsey, but I have lost a very close family member to me and I do still live life w/o regrets - meaning that I don't go into debt for vacations, but if something were to happen to my girls tomorrow - I wouldn't be wishing - I wish I would have paid off my student loans a year sooner. So, besides the student loans, we are doing very well.
Just looking at our student loans is so daunting/overwhelming - and I was just looking for some encouragement that it is possible! (also - they are totally up to date and still in good standing).
I get it. If you are like us, your student loan debt is so large, that if you buckle down and cut everything you can, your kids will be grown by the time you do pay them off, and you certainly will regret never doing anything fun or taking a vacation with them. We can cancel our upcoming VERY BUDGET trip and pay an extra 2K on the student loans, but it would be like spitting in the ocean.
For us, I did have to come to the realization (and this isn't really because of the student loans only), that because I did spend so much time and money getting that stinking accounting degree, that I really couldn't stay home any longer. Right now DH and I work 4 days a week each, and don't have the same day off, so we need child care M, W, F only. We each get a day home with the little guy, driving 2 older, paid off cars, and are still plugging along at the student loans. I don't regret not taking a more aggressive approach to paying them off, but I'll admit it seems like for DH's grad school loans, there is no end in sight. Hopefully we'll pay off mine sooner. Mine is Standard pay, and we do have DH's on graduated. If you want the cheapest payments possible, you want Extended, which is a 20 year amortization. Some options are only for over a certain dollar amount.
There's definitely an implied trade-off with our schedules. Not that we'd get raises if we went back to 5 day work weeks, but we definitely can't look at getting other higher paying jobs somewhere else at the moment, because our schedules and our family life is very important with the ages of our 3 kids. It's all one big balancing act between the preschooler's schedule, the other two kids, their activities- carpools, practices, games, shows, meetings, etc. We've negotiated what we have, and it's hard to walk into a new job negotiating an alternative work schedue.
And if you haven't already, DON'T consolidate yours and DH's. I have yet to see any benefit in doing so, except the convenience of one payment. At least if you keep them separate, you have the benefit of knowing if something were to happen to one of you, the loans are forgiven. If you consolidate, and something were to happen to DH, you would still be on the hook for the joint debt.
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