OT- Birthday dilemma, need advice!

[PrincessMama605]

We have neighbours that have a girl the same age as Dd. The girls are friendly, they were even in the same class last year. I don't really know them beyond saying hi at the bus stop. Dd came home yesterday and told me that the neighbours mother had invited her to come over on Thu for 10 to 15 mins to sing happy b-day and that it would mean a lot to this girl.
Dd says she wants to go, but she wants me to go with her. It seems odd to me and I am not sure what to do. If we do go should we bring her a small gift? And what would we get? I truly have no idea what this girl likes. Any advice is appreciated!

Sorry this is OT, but this is where I would usually go for advice.

 

[smitch425]

We have neighbours that have a girl the same age as Dd. The girls are friendly, they were even in the same class last year. I don't really know them beyond saying hi at the bus stop. Dd came home yesterday and told me that the neighbours mother had invited her to come over on Thu for 10 to 15 mins to sing happy b-day and that it would mean a lot to this girl.
Dd says she wants to go, but she wants me to go with her. It seems odd to me and I am not sure what to do. If we do go should we bring her a small gift? And what would we get? I truly have no idea what this girl likes. Any advice is appreciated!

Sorry this is OT, but this is where I would usually go for advice.

I have never heard of someone being invited over for a 10 minute birthday celebration, so I would not send a gift. That just seems odd to me. I probably wouldn't even let my DD go.

 

[aaarcher86]

Is this is on a school night or something? The only way that makes a small amount of sense to me is if they are just wanting her to come over after dinner to sing and have a piece of cake and then go home....

I wouldn't send a present since it isn't a party, but if it makes you feel better to send one you could always do a gift card to Target or something.

 

[TnTWalter]

they're probably trying to be friendly. i would go with her. make some cookies or something as a gift if you don't want to spend $$ otherwise journals and pretty pens are always great for girls elementary/middle school [not sure age].

 

[wiigirl]

As a rule of thumb, for me anyways, if it involves singing Happy Birthday...I would bring a small gift or atleast a card.

 

[scrapquitler]

I have never heard of someone being invited over for a 10 minute birthday celebration, so I would not send a gift. That just seems odd to me. I probably wouldn't even let my DD go.

I don't see why you think it's odd. They are probably just having cake with the family (maybe they are planning a party another time or something). So you go, sing happy birthday, eat a piece of cake then go home. It's not a big deal. I'd probably have my DD make a birthday card for the girl, and that would be it.

 

[smitch425]

I don't see why you think it's odd. They are probably just having cake with the family (maybe they are planning a party another time or something). So you go, sing happy birthday, eat a piece of cake then go home. It's not a big deal. I'd probably have my DD make a birthday card for the girl, and that would be it.

Had the OP said something about coming over for cake, it would make more sense, but she just said sing, so cake didn't even enter my mind.

OP, is there a reason why your DD wants you to go with her? Maybe she is not 100% comfortable with the invite. Do you usually go with her? Will the parents want you to come with her? I would give the neighbor a call and just say that your DD mentioned something about the girl's birthday and ask them what it is that they were asking of your DD. My kids don't go to anyone's house without me speaking directly to the parents first, unless they are going to just be outside where I can see them.

 

[v.t.]

Why don't you call the mom and ask? Just say, "DD said something about coming over but wasn't sure about the time." Hopefully the mom will fill in the details.

 

[girli565]

Isn't it kind of implied that if they're singing happy birthday that there'd be a cake, at least I would think so, lol.

I don't see it as strange. My mother always had a cake and we sang happy birthday as a family and a few neighbor kids when my bday fell on a school night. it was a quick sing and eat a slice of cake thing. I never expected gifts. maybe a nice card or something your DD could make?

 

[disykat]

That's what I was thinking. Just have your dd make her a card.

 

[angierae]

Is it possibly the case of them not being able to afford a birthday party, so this is their way of letting their daughter celebrate with a friend?

 

[midwestdee]

absolutely - talk to the mom before you do anything else. you don't say how old the girls are - but the way your daughter described it - it sounds weird and creepy to me. Of course, we all know that what was actually said and what your child communicated to you can be two separate things. Use your inner mom to decide once you get the facts.

 

[auralia]

my go to gift when in doubt is always a book of some kind, less than 5-7$ usually and most kids like them. the k-2 set do magic tree house or junie b jones, underpants ones for older, pete the cat. I'm sure you know the kid of books your DD reads! just my 2 cents.

 

[mrsbornkuntry]

I've done this before when we weren't having a party, instead we will be going someplace as a family like go-karts or something so we will have cake at home. The kids will just grab the friends in the neighborhood and ask them in for cake basically so we don't have a ton of leftover cake. A gift is never expected when we do it, really it's just to enjoy cake, but it would be a nice gesture if your daughter brought a small gift like a book or a generic "everyone" toy like a slinky.

 

[Claire&TheBoys]

When my son goes to a party where the birthday child says, "you don't have to bring a gift," I send him with a card and a giftcard enclosed. Just $10 to Sonic or DQ or something is adequate. I would do as the others said and make a point to talk to the mom at the bus-stop or call her and get more details.

 

[PrincessMama605]

OP here, thanks everyone for the replies. I did talk to the mother at the bus stop and she said that they were just doing a small celebration and wanted dd to come over to sing and have cake. I will let dd pick out a small gift to bring.

 

[nchulka]

What I find odd is that 2 girls who are friendly with each other and old enough to be in school and live close enough to share a bus stop aren't playing at each others houses all the time anyway. In our subdivision all the kids run around together outside and play at each others houses.

 

[wannagoback]

What I find odd is that 2 girls who are friendly with each other and old enough to be in school and live close enough to share a bus stop aren't playing at each others houses all the time anyway. In our subdivision all the kids run around together outside and play at each others houses.

Our bus stop is a block away from DD's good friend. They are 8 and rarely play at each other's houses. But we've got 3 kids, they've got 3 kids, and we're all busy doing kid things. Our houses are in different directions and we cut through two yards to get to the bus stop so it's not a clear path from one house to the other. Different things in different neighborhoods, I suppose. Maybe once they get a bit older and it is warmer they will see more of each other in the neighborhood. That's just my long way of saying that I didn't think it was odd that they don't already play together

OP, I'd have DD make a card and send that along for the birthday girl

 

[Leajess99]

What I find odd is that 2 girls who are friendly with each other and old enough to be in school and live close enough to share a bus stop aren't playing at each others houses all the time anyway. In our subdivision all the kids run around together outside and play at each others houses.

Just because a child is friendly does not make thm friends. My kids are friendly with several kids but they don't hang out together or anything like that. Heck, there are many kids around here that my kids are friendly with that I don't want in my house. My daughter's close friends don't live close by.

 

[angwill]

they're probably trying to be friendly. i would go with her. make some cookies or something as a gift if you don't want to spend $$ otherwise journals and pretty pens are always great for girls elementary/middle school [not sure age].

I see it this way. I would also just give a little something there are lots of inexpensive girly things. Even a cheap disney throw would work.