Opinions on repeating Kindergarten

[Tigger&Belle]

Where's it going to end? First you'll have kids with Summer birthdays being held back, then the kids with Fall birthdays will be the youngest, and their parents will want to hold them back, etc. Pretty soon all the kids will be 10 before they start 1st grade.

I'm kind of kidding, but the really old kids in my son's class are almost two years older than he is, since he's a Summer birthday kid. They are the better better at sports usually, and that's what really matters to a lot of parents.

It saddens me to think that parents hold kids back for sports reasons, but I know some do.

 

[OceanAnnie]

I'm a teacher too. My perspective is it depends on the child, but I think retention should only be done in extreme cases.

If you are retaining the child to "mature" in K isn't that counterproductive? The children will be younger than your child and they will be exhibiting younger social skill sets. If you were to let the child go to 1st he would be exposed to more mature children and will in time model those behaviors and it will become part of his norm. It happens all the time. It just seems more logical to me. (Ofcourse I'm not speaking to extremely immature children.)

I cringe when I hear of retention and the child is on target academically. I think of the message it sends to the child, when they hear they have to repeat K. I think of children becoming bored with the material they have already mastered and thus turned off to education. For every success story you hear about people retaining, there is one where the student reports it wasn't so great for them.
You just don't want that dissatisfied student to be your child in the end.

I do think it's a personal decision. But there is a lot to consider. Just my .02.

 

[momof2inPA]

All the kids in my sons' classes (3rd and K) know which students repeated a grade, but my kindergartener thinks one boy is repeating because he was too short to be in first grade. The kid isn't short at all, but my son is, so he's a bit worried. My third grader just started at this school this year, but word gets around.

 

[ILUVMYBRIT]

I just wanted to add that, while people are saying its not a good thing to hold a child back for maturity reasons...its also not a good thing to get a child in 4th grade who cant handle the stress. My son developed a tic from it. Within a week of moving him back to 3rd, the tic was gone. Now ours was extreme and the principal was a big help. She told the kids in the class that when the papers came from DS's old school she misread them and assigned him to the wrong grade. My DS doesnt have any issues about being held back and he says he is very glad we did it for him. Very well adjusted and happy with no problems in school or with friends.

Good Luck, only you and your child's teacher know the best choice for your child.

 

[tar heel]

The cutoff date for going to kindergarten is Oct. 15.

 

[jen0610]

Jen - Have been there and done that with two. I can tell you quite honestly to go with your instincts of what is best for you and your child.

DD8, like your son, has a June birthday, so she was the youngest in her class. Per her report card, she had all the skills she needed to go from K to 1st. We discussed with her K teacher, more than once, about having her repeat Kindergarten. Per the teacher, she was just fine and more than ready.
So, we go to the 1st parent/teacher conference for 1st grade and the 1st thing she asks us, did we ever think of holding DD back, becasue she is behind on so many of the skills, especially reading. Needless to say, something hit the fan. Told her what we had discussed the the K teacher and what she told us. Per the 1st grade teacher, THEY the teachers can't suggest to a parent to have a child repeat, but if a parent is questioning it, they are to provide accurate info for the parents to make a decision. Our K teacher did not advise correctly, which, according to the 1st grade teacher, our DD wasn't the only one in her class from this K teacher, that really wasn't ready for 1st. We made the decision to leave her in 1st and she how she progressed. By the end of the year, her reading was still only at an early 1st grade level. We had her repeat 1st grade. The 2nd time around was a wold of difference. With her reading over the summer, she started the school year at an improved reading level and she made honor roll all year.

With our son, his wasn't so much he didn't learn, but a teacher just flat out not liking a student and not doing anything to teach this student. DS has ADHA and if you don't make lessons interesting, his attention goes down the drain. The teacher that he had for 3rd, had a hard and fast rule, the kids put their hands on their desks, hands in laps and their minds and ears on her voice. Becasue of his ADHA and speech impediment, he has a modified learning schedule. This teacher WOULD NOT, modify her assisgnments to meet his BY LAW ordered schedule. And yes, the principle and the school administration were made very well aware of her issues. There was another girl in this class, on a modified schedule and she was given assistance and the modification her order called for, but not my son. So by the end of the year, this teacher was ready to pass him onto the 4th grade. When I questions about his reading level, I was told that, that wasn't really important, as he had made grades good enough to pass to 4th. Needless to say, once I went to the principle and demaded to know what his level was, he was only at late 2nd/early 3rd grade level. He repeated 3rd grade last year, and what a difference a year and a different teacher makes. He was on the honor roll all of last year. And he enjoyed school.

Trust your judgement. If you really feel that having your DS repeat, do so.