New SD banning abortion..

[VSL]

I also had to hold the hand of an 11 year old girl who not only was pregnant, but had four sexually-transmitted diseases. Her mother couldn't be with her because no one knew where she was; and the father couldn't be there because he was in jail for raping his daughter and getting her pregnant and giving her the STD's in the first place.

 

[luvmydogs]

Let's talk about the nonsense called parental notification which is still the law in many states. It really works in cases like this doesn't it?

We had parental notification here (not sure of the law anymore), and once had to go through judicial bypass for a 12 year old who lived with her illiterate grandmother although she didn't have official custody, because her parents were drug addicts and couldn't be found. The poor grandmother had to be read every single word of every legal and medical document and sign with an X after the judge gave the bypass. The 12 yr. old was pregnant by her 16 yr. old brother.

 

[mickeyfan2]

I did want to add a comment about the rights of the father, and this will probably be unpopular, but here you go:

I, as a woman, fully believe that if a woman has the freedom and choice to carry or not carry a baby to term (and she should) that the father should also have the freedom to "opt out" of participating in the child's life (whether financial or otherwise.)

I understand completely, that is why I asked the question. If the father can veto the abortion, then the women becomes a mom against her will and if the mother chooses to have the baby and the man wanted the abortion he becomes a dad against his will. I am very pro-birth control and would like to see no abortions (expect medical, rape, etc) and then nobody is unhappy with the results. I for one do not think abortions solves all of our problems.

Also I have heard that women who have abortions have twice (hope memory is not failing me now) the rate of depression as women who never had an abortion. This too is something that concerns me.

 

[MzDiz]

Something that has always been a question to me about the women's body and she can do what she wants is for the Father's rights. Many men are good father's but they have no say in their unborn babies life. I don't know how to resolve this. We give the women all the rights. If she wants to abort, he loses his child. If she wants the baby, he pay support. I know there are cases when he and she want the abortion or they both want the baby. That is not an issue for me. I am more interested when they want the opposite. For me the my body my rules is not the complete answer for me. For you pro-choice people how do you see this issue?

In my opinion, people should know who they're sleeping with. You should know where the person stands on these issues *before* you jump into bed with them. Of course, this kind of thinking would solve SO many problems related to sex. Common sense doesn't seem to be too common though.
If a guy hops in the sack with someone he doesn't know well and finds out later that she's got different views about that than he does, sorry charlie, you should have done your homework.

 

[mickeyfan2]

The story of the 11 and 12 years olds are just sick. I hope the girls got mega counseling.

 

[luvmydogs]

The story of the 11 and 12 years olds are just sick. I hope the girls got mega counseling.

It was terrible, and we gave counseling referrals to our local trauma center for both girls--they were way beyond our capabilities. The 11 yr. old had even stopped speaking.

I don't want anyone to think I posted these examples to dramatize the issue or to give it shock value. These two cases were certainly not representative of the majority of the women we saw. I honestly respect many viewpoints, and have counseled women about keeping their children when they felt pressured to have abortions--the resources and medical care were there, they just had to be given the knowledge to use them. My point of posting the experiences of these girls is just to give some pause for thought--abortion is not always as cut and dried as it seems, and I worry about those who would be in charge of drawing that line in the sand when it comes to a woman's rights under any circumstances--whom do we entrust with that? This is the reason I believe women themselves (and in consultation with others whom they deem important and appropriate) have the ultimate say in what happens to their bodies--be it adoption, abortion or continuation of the pregnancies.

 

[punkin]

I understand completely, that is why I asked the question. If the father can veto the abortion, then the women becomes a mom against her will and if the mother chooses to have the baby and the man wanted the abortion he becomes a dad against his will. I am very pro-birth control and would like to see no abortions (expect medical, rape, etc) and then nobody is unhappy with the results. I for one do not think abortions solves all of our problems.

Also I have heard that women who have abortions have twice (hope memory is not failing me now) the rate of depression as women who never had an abortion. This too is something that concerns me.

Biology isn't fair. Women carry babies and have more responsibilities for their care. They should therefore have final say. I'm all for talking with your SO, but a one-night stand should not be able to force anything.

Additionally, I don't think abortions solve any underlying problems, but they sure do get rid of the immediate problem: an unwanted pregnancy.

 

[mickeyfan2]

I'm all for talking with your SO, but a one-night stand should not be able to force anything.

I am not thinking about one-night stands, but when there is a longer term relationship. I worked with a women who got pregnant with her third, her DH wanted the kid and she did not. She got the abortion. To me there were alternatives (tubal, bit V) to have prevented the third pregnancy. Their marriage has been rocky, but I don't know if it was rocky before or not. This is the one that got me thinking about the father's right.

 

[wvjules]

Does this SD ban also include the morning after pill?

 

[Beth76]

Something that has always been a question to me about the women's body and she can do what she wants is for the Father's rights. Many men are good father's but they have no say in their unborn babies life. I don't know how to resolve this. We give the women all the rights. If she wants to abort, he loses his child. If she wants the baby, he pay support. I know there are cases when he and she want the abortion or they both want the baby. That is not an issue for me. I am more interested when they want the opposite. For me the my body my rules is not the complete answer for me. For you pro-choice people how do you see this issue?

As harsh as it sounds, I have no problem with the fathers having no rights here. That's just what sucks to be a man in this issue. What if you have a father who fights for the right to raise this child and then he changes his mind? What if this father is a rapist and there's no evidence for a conviction? You can not give a person the right to another person's body. You just can not.

 

[tiberius]

Does this SD ban also include the morning after pill?

No, it does not read that way to me.

 

[MrsKreamer]

Did anyone know that only about 800 abortions were performed each year in SD... I just thought that was interesting. If the represented people wanted this ban they why shouldn't they have it?

 

[Beth76]

Did anyone know that only about 800 abortions were performed each year in SD... I just thought that was interesting. If the represented people wanted this ban they why shouldn't they have it?

Because the represented people who want this ban are those who don't want abortions.

 

[crazyforgoofy]

Did anyone know that only about 800 abortions were performed each year in SD... I just thought that was interesting. If the represented people wanted this ban they why shouldn't they have it?

Considering how difficult it is to find a provider it doesn't surprise me the number is low. Also the total population of South Dakota is only 770,000. I wonder if you're sure if the "represented people" want this ban or if their representatives have decided they do.

 

[mickeyfan2]

Did anyone know that only about 800 abortions were performed each year in SD... I just thought that was interesting. If the represented people wanted this ban they why shouldn't they have it?

How does that compare to other states? Maybe SD residents don't really want abortions. I don't live there so I don't know the answer for them.

 

[Beth76]

How does that compare to other states? Maybe SD residents don't really want abortions. I don't live there so I don't know the answer for them.

Obviously 800 people wanted abortions. Of course, it's only the people who don't want abortions who want it to be banned. They don't use the service. But, what about the people who do? Why should they be denied? I don't smoke, but I don't seek legislation to stop others from smoking, even though I truly abhor the practice.

 

[beckmrk04]

What you miss is many people don't see the legal murder of millions of unborn babies as a freedom anyone should have. People constantly throw up that abortions are medically necessary, but if you read the statistics on the US CDC website. Approximately 1% of abortions reported in the US are medically necessary and another 7% in the case of rape. That leaves 92% who are using it is as oops birth control. Very sad and troubling!

I think that statistics for one- are nearly ALWAYS off. What if women simply didn't report that the abortion was due to a rape- what if they LIED because they were ashamed? Statistics should always be taken lightly, especially in issues where it is very hard to get statistics because of the sensitive nature of the subject. I have had victims in the ER who had OBVIOUSLY been raped, but were trying to protect the person or their family and would flat out deny being raped. One girl's ***** were ripped, and she claimed it was a spider bite! Later she finally admitted the truth, but would not talk to the police to even file a report. SO- there is yet another rape that didn't get logged into federal statistics... So- there's my rap about stats... They are usually off.

AND- agree with another poster- it doesn't matter why they happened anyway. WE HAVE CHOICE. Thankfully. Birth control does fail. Condoms break. My mom got pregnant with me on the pill. She chose to keep me. SHE HAD CHOICE.

Finally, if people were PROPERLY educated about sex and their bodies, and given birth control options available to them, there would be a whole lot less OOPS! We would never dream of sending a 16 yr old out to drive a car without instruction, but we'll send them out into the world without teaching them about their bodies, and healthy sexuality and healthy sexual relationships, and how to avoid getting pregnant, because I think it's pretty clear they are gonna have sex anyway. Let's teach them to be responsible.

 

[azgal81]

I am pro choice I don't want the government making my decision for me. That is my choice just like some of you choose to be pro life, don't look down on us who choose not to be it's our choice just like being pro life is yours. I think this is a free country and we should be allowed to make whatever decision we need to and the government is not us so they shoudln't be able to choose for us. There are way too many old fashioned people out there apparently especially those on the supreme court.

 

[WatchinCaptKangaroo]

Did anyone know that only about 800 abortions were performed each year in SD... I just thought that was interesting. If the represented people wanted this ban they why shouldn't they have it?

Why do they need a ban to prevent abortions? If someone doesn't want to have an abortion then they don't have one; they don't need a ban to stop them from not having one when they wern't going to have one to begin with.

 

[goofygirl]

I am fully pro-choice and concur with many of the statments made above.

I did want to add a comment about the rights of the father, and this will probably be unpopular, but here you go:

I, as a woman, fully believe that if a woman has the freedom and choice to carry or not carry a baby to term (and she should) that the father should also have the freedom to "opt out" of participating in the child's life (whether financial or otherwise.)

This, of course, doesn't solve the problem of the man wanting the child and the woman not, but it at least is a step towards equity.

Actually, I agree with this "unpopular" view: Its her body, her choice,
and men should not be forced into fatherhood just like women should not be forced into motherhood.