My MIL is Cold Hearted

[Crankyshank]

I'm not going to make any judgements about the OP.
Right now my concern is for that poor dog and to make sure it's saved and given to a good home. Please contact rescue or local no-kill shelters.

OT - It makes me so sad to see dogs taken from their home, especially for reasons like "moving" or "no longer had time for the dog". A local shelter has had a run on older dogs given up for the no time reason. It breaks my heart to see it.

 

[robinb]

I think we should all wait until she talks to her DH before starting to blow her to pieces. She sees now that she made a mistake by giving the dog to her in-laws. So what?!? She's trying to fix the sitution now and coulda, shoulda, woulda isn't going to help. Neither is picking at her. If you really care about the dog, then let her bounce some of these ideas off her DH over lunch. I honestly wouldn't make a decision about my in-laws with my husband's input!

 

[Serena]

Get the dog and take it to a shelter. At least there it has a chance.

I won't comment on all the bad decisions beforehand. Hopefully lessons will be learned from it.

 

[phamton]

Originally posted by tiggersmom2
Really? Do you also happen to know a child that is capable of biting another child's jugular, or ripping half the other child's face off or maybe causing puncture wounds so deep that the other child dies? I didn't think so.

We are not talking about viscous animals here. If a dog is truly dangerous then I have no complaint about choosing to put it down. But to put down an animal because it once bit in self-defense just sounds cruel. Surely you can see the difference. Any animal will bite if scared, injured, or attacked. The dog is a beagle for goodness sake, not a rottweiler. The dog shouldn't be branded as a killer.

I've owned horses all my life. They buck, bite, and kick and are perfectly capable of killing a person. I would not put one down for bucking once nor would I put a dog down for biting once in self-defense.

 

[Madi100]

Originally posted by Dee & Greg
We really should retire this thread to the "I made a series of bad desicions, and now I want to be showered with Pixie Dust" Hall of Fame.

After working in an animal shelter for over 10 years, I have heard this story so many times that it makes me crazy...

Parents get a dog/cat/other living animal

Animal doesn't fit in with lifestyle/children are frightened/ don't have the time/ moving/etc

Parent gives the animal away

Animal ends up in bad situation

No one wants to take the responsbility to do anything about the situation

OP: are you really looking for advice and will you actually DO anything? Or would you prefer we all just give you hugs?
You've received several good pieces of advice, and one direct line to an animal organization.

My favorite scenario: Folks are moving and bring the animal to a shelter. I would look at them and ask "Did you find another home for your children, too?" They would look at me like I was joking. Guess What? I'm not.

Yes, animals are not human, but they are a responsibility. If you get an animal, it is YOUR responsibility to care for them and treat them correctly. Not put them in a bad situation.

Thanks. I've made a mental note that you believe I'm a horrible person, and not to worry I wont' ever expect you to think otherwise.

It was not right in ours lives at the time for us to have a dog. Does that makes us bad people? No. Does it mean we made a bad decision? Yes. My FIL does really love the dog. I'm not sure why he is allowing it to happen. Would I have given them the dog if my niece was there to begin with, no. And, I don't think my MIL is exactly abusive, she's just not a warm fuzzy person. And, at the time I thought the dog was going to a good home. I know now that we made a horrible decision giving her the dog. I would have never thought she would put it to sleep and that is because the dog means so much to our children.

And thank you to the person who said that I should talk to my husband because it is his mother. My daughter is leaving for an overnight trip early this afternoon. Is she ready to go? Nope. I've got the house to clean before she leaves. Is it done? Nope. I've got about 20 hours of work I can be doing. Have I done any of it yet today? Nope. I have spent the last two hours trying to work this out. I've talked to my husband. He is supposed to be on the phone with his mother right now. I'm really trying to make this work. I really am.

I am very thankful for those that have provided links for me. My MIL lives four hours away from me. If she would wait to do it, we could go and get the dog. If she won't we really can't just run across the street and pick him up. I'm very thankful for those of you that have provided positive words to me.

 

[tiggersmom2]

Originally posted by phamton
We are not talking about viscous animals here. If a dog is truly dangerous then I have no complaint about choosing to put it down. But to put down an animal because it once bit in self-defense just sounds cruel. Surely you can see the difference. Any animal will bite if scared, injured, or attacked. The dog is a beagle for goodness sake, not a rottweiler. The dog shouldn't be branded as a killer.

I've owned horses all my life. They buck, bite, and kick and are perfectly capable of killing a person. I would not put one down for bucking once nor would I put a dog down for biting once in self-defense.

My post simply illustrated how ridiculous it is to compare a child that bites to an animal that bites.

 

[phamton]

Originally posted by tiggersmom2
My post simply illustrated how ridiculous it is to compare a child that bites to an animal that bites.

Oh, OK. Gotcha. Sorry I jumped to conclusion.

As far as the OP, I don't think you did a bad thing. You gave the dog to a good home (your FIL) and did not expect the dog to be put down. I don't blame anyone but your MIL.

I used to raise corgis. When I sold my puppies, even though I investigated the homes they went to, I have no guarantee that they won't put the dog down years later. You did the best you could at the time. Hopefully, you can help save this dog but if you can't, it is not your fault.

 

[tiggersmom2]

Originally posted by phamton
Oh, OK. Gotcha. Sorry I jumped to conclusion.

Not a problem I should have clarified myself and said that I DON'T think the dog should be put down......I guess I just expect people to read my mind!

 

[snoopy]

I don't think the OP is a horrible person either. I would be beside myself in a situation like this and looking for advice from wherever I could get it, so I don't blame her for asking us.

I sure hope it works out with that link cranky gave you. That would be the ideal situation for everyone involved.

 

[MB MinnieGirl]

To the OP. I hope that you have weeded through the nasty uncalled for and rude comments here and found some type of solution. I do feel for you, I'm sure you feel party responsibile - weather that is justified or not is not the point here.

I've read people speaking of how rude and nasty people have gotten on the CB lately, but other than political threads, I had been fortunate not to witness it. That is until last night, and now again today on this thread. It's really sad that somebody post with a problem or simply vents and people begin to snarl their teeth like a rabid dog. I believe I will exit this thread and start putting that ignore button to good use.

Good luck to you Madi100! And you are not a horrible person for the record. You placed the dog with your MIL b/c your FIL had fallen in love with it. Seems like a very kind thing to do - you had no crystal ball to look into the future with, or I'm sure you would have made another decision.

 

[Crankyshank]

Hopefully your MIL will be willing to wait before she takes action.

Please keep us updated with whatever you do.

If you do contact BREW or another rescue and they are unable to place the dog, please see if they will work it out with other rescues with arranging transportation for the dog to the northeast.
If I have to take in another beagle in order to spare its life, I will.

 

[EsmeraldaX]

Couldn't you go over to her house and take the dog out?

Or does she live too far?

 

[EsmeraldaX]

. Never mind.

I don't even know why I bother posting on threads about this subject.

 

[luvindisneyworld]

Has anything been figured out yet?

 

[momof2inPA]

Originally posted by EsmeraldaX
Couldn't you go over to her house and take the dog out?

Or does she live too far?

OP said MIL lives 4 hours away.

 

[EsmeraldaX]

Thanks. I missed that about the 4 hours.

 

[missyc]

Originally posted by phamton
Oh, OK. Gotcha. Sorry I jumped to conclusion.

As far as the OP, I don't think you did a bad thing. You gave the dog to a good home (your FIL) and did not expect the dog to be put down. I don't blame anyone but your MIL.

I used to raise corgis. When I sold my puppies, even though I investigated the homes they went to, I have no guarantee that they won't put the dog down years later. You did the best you could at the time. Hopefully, you can help save this dog but if you can't, it is not your fault.

I used to have a corgi! He was the best dog, except that he was an escape artist. And once he was lose he would growl and snap if anyone tried to catch him. He was like 2 different dogs. 1 inside...and 1 outside. He truly wanted to be free! So after 1 1/2 years we gave him to a friend who lives out in the country. He has about 10 acres to roam, and horses and chickens to torment! I still miss him sooo much. but I was afraid that he would bite someone and have to be put down.

 

[mudnuri]

I think this thread has gotten WAY out of hand......

Brandy

 

[LoraJ]

Originally posted by tiggersmom2
My post simply illustrated how ridiculous it is to compare a child that bites to an animal that bites.

And I wasn't talking about animals that maliciously attack. I said a bite that breaks the skin.

 

[DemonLlama]

Madi100
We were in the same boat as you as far as realizing the dog we had adopted was not working out. We were lucky enough to find a good home for her and she is now in her eleventh year with her family. She looked like a beagle, but must have had a hound for a father becuase she got BIG. We see in her in every Christmas card the family sends us.

Anyway, she was a good fit for them at the time, and it worked out, but if they had had a new family member come in and start being mean to the dog, we would have been in the same boat as you. And you don't deserve to be ridiculed for trying to find a good home for the dog when it didn't work out at your place.

Keep us posted!