Mean School Lunch Ladies!!

[Wishing on a star]

Magicfan,

Excellent post!!!!

And, really a great way to end this whole thread!!!

I am signing off the computer now, But, I just could not help myself from adding one last observation.

Here we have a thread about a child who has ended up WETTING herself at school.... More than once...

I think it is very interesting to note that we have seen not one tiny shred of concern about this child... not one tiny hint of respect for parents... No common courtesy whatsoever from the 'teachers'. Only derogatory, self-righteous, judgemental remarks. (The big slur of SAHM's and 'precious child', being some of the worst. Hey we've even got complete opposite judgements here.... Both, over-involved mama-bear who has taught the child that they are 'god's gift', and neglectful/abusive louse, in the SAME thread!!! )

Here we have a child and parent with a VALID problem.... But, watch out for the wrath of the Teacher-Gods....

 

[castleview]

While I am happy with your pro-potty-break outlook;

Sorry, but I have heard these kinds of 'Martyr' and 'Self-righteous' comments many times before...

ex: I don't even get to eat my lunch... etc....

ummmm..... HOURS without a potty break????? GET real... YOU get the chance to go WHILE the kids are in the lunch-room... (where they do not get the chance) WHILE they are in P.E., Library, Specials, etc.. on and on...

I simply do NOT buy it... You are an adult... You are the one in control. If you are not getting a potty break, then, guess what??? That is your problem.


edited to add, after reading above post: And, YES, ALL children are precious!!!!!! It is just SAD when teachers throw that term-around in a derogatory way.

Hey, TAG fairy(s), are you out there... Here is a little hint!

Happy and proud to be one of 'Those' moms!!!

or,

Fierce Mama Lioness!!!!!

OK, what's your problem with teachers? I've seen several of your replies on other education related threads and you seem to have a real complex about them.

Are you jealous of the millions of dollars teachers make? I think not. Are you carrying baggage from your own school days? Do you think the rules should apply to everyone except your child? Or do you simply hate not getting your way all the time?

No one at all is saying these lunch ladies were correct, but everytime you see an opportunity to slam a school system, you just jump on it.

*Edited because I put this up right after your last post. If you look at my first post on this thread, you'll see I was in total support of the parent. You are the one who got off track by insulting teachers. BTW, I too am a SAHM and didn't see any "slurs". But I guess if I really wanted to be a victim, I could take it incorrectly.

 

[Daxx]

I think it is very interesting to note that we have seen not one tiny shred of concern about this child... not one tiny thread of respect for parents... No common courtesy whatsoever from the 'teachers'.

Sorry, but both teachers on this thread stated that they do give bathroom breaks on a regular basis and can understand what the parent is going through.

The OP has had several tactics recommended ... from having her child just go to the bathroom anyway, to running out saying "Emergency" to volunteering to help w/bathroom during lunch time. Magicfan even posted an article on what parents and kids can do.

So, there is concern and care on this thread.

 

[magicfan]

You make it sound like every child in your class is starving and has uncaring parents. It's probably a small minority. And, if you have such a negative attitude and have to refer to kids in a sarcastic, negative light, then why are you teaching at all? Maybe you should find another career.If these kids are so poor, don't they qualify for free school lunches? If that child is hungry, then they will eat. You teach at a Catholic school?

How can I be judgemental when mothers tell me that they get up w/enough time to put their kids in the car to get them to school and no time to make breakfast. They tell me that their Kdgs. are "self sufficient" and get dressed by themselves and take care of breakfast. Is that judgemental when I hear it from the moms? I have had parents say don't have the time to work with t their child. I have had parents tell me that they don't care what happens at school b/c school "doesn't matter". They tell me that I shouldn't give homework and that I should teach them everything in school. Homework is given to reinforce what is learned -- extra practice. And, homework isn't much -- maybe printing your name three times or doing a four problem math worksheet. How can I be judgemental when I hear it from the parents? I am not judging them if they're telling me what it's like.

If you came into my class and saw some of the situations my students come from, you'd understand my post. Several are at or below poverty level. The parents of these children are able to send their children to my school b/c of parishoners who donate funds for needy children to get a Catholic education. We accept anyone who has a desire to attend. In many cases, as long as a parent can pay ten dollars a week, their child can attend b/c the priest will just allow the billing to go. Yes, they rack up a fortune and many end up not paying it at all in the end.

I have students who come in hungry, who tell me there is no food in the house. I have received boxes from our food pantry to send home to these families. I know they go home to very little to eat for dinner b/c food pantry boxes last only so long. I have students who don't bring in lunch b/c there's no food in the house. These kids get no help from their parents w/projects or school work.

How can I judge when it's being told to me straight from the horse's mouth?

 

[magicfan]

To the teachers:

Is school is session right now?

 

[RickinNYC]

How can I be judgemental when mothers tell me that they get up w/enough time to put their kids in the car to get them to school and no time to make breakfast. They tell me that their Kdgs. are "self sufficient" and get dressed by themselves and take care of breakfast. Is that judgemental when I hear it from the moms? I have had parents say don't have the time to work with t their child. I have had parents tell me that they don't care what happens at school b/c school "doesn't matter". They tell me that I shouldn't give homework and that I should teach them everything in school. Homework is given to reinforce what is learned -- extra practice. And, homework isn't much -- maybe printing your name three times or doing a four problem math worksheet. How can I be judgemental when I hear it from the parents? I am not judging them if they're telling me what it's like.

If you came into my class and saw some of the situations my students come from, you'd understand my post. Several are at or below poverty level. The parents of these children are able to send their children to my school b/c of parishoners who donate funds for needy children to get a Catholic education. We accept anyone who has a desire to attend. In many cases, as long as a parent can pay ten dollars a week, their child can attend b/c the priest will just allow the billing to go. Yes, they rack up a fortune and many end up not paying it at all in the end.

I have students who come in hungry, who tell me there is no food in the house. I have received boxes from our food pantry to send home to these families. I know they go home to very little to eat for dinner b/c food pantry boxes last only so long. I have students who don't bring in lunch b/c there's no food in the house. These kids get no help from their parents w/projects or school work.

How can I judge when it's being told to me straight from the horse's mouth?

Daxx, thanks for being a teacher. The school system needs more caring people like you.

Admittedly, sadly no, I don't have children. My partner Joe and I would love to adopt and perhaps we will one day. But I thought I'd show my support for you nevertheless. Why? Because I was a student at one time in my life. And so was Joe. And we remember those teachers that went the extra mile for us when parents might have failed. And parents do folks.

Joe was raised by a caring, loving single mother. They were welfare recipients and try as she might, things were pretty darn tough on the family financially. Joe distinctly remembers his principal, a man who made a point of knowing every child's first name. More importantly, he remembered every welfare child who received a free lunch. And without making those children suffer any embarrassment by forcing them to sign a ledger, submit a coupon or give their name while in line with their peers, this principal simply stood at the front of the line and when a child like Joe came up, tray full of food, big green eyes looking at the adult for guidance, the principal would simply smile, bid Joe hello and give the lunch lady a quick and discrete nod. And off Joe would go, dignity intact, enjoying his lunch with his friends.

Joe also told me of a few different teachers who would bring in boxes of donated clothes. They would discretely invite children from welfare families to come by after school, when no other kids were around, and let them sort through the boxes for themselves, selecting shirts, pants, socks, shoes, etc... These teachers would even mother these kids, making sure the shoes fit, that the pants were the right size, showing what matched what.

Joe tells me these stories, not with any sadness for having been brought up in a family that accepted welfare, but as bright moments in his life that wouldn't have happened without some pretty terrific, genuinely caring, wonderful teachers showing them that someone knows and cares. He remembers that these adults made him feel like he mattered.

So to the teachers out there who go the extra mile for the children, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I know one grown man who remembers you, and I thank you for helping shape him into the awesome, loving, caring man he is today.

On a sidenote, Joe has decided to leave his pretty successful, 16 year publishing career behind and has chosen to be a teacher. I'm nothing but proud of him for making such a great decision.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Sorry, but both teachers on this thread stated that they do give bathroom breaks on a regular basis and can understand what the parent is going through.

The OP has had several tactics recommended ... from having her child just go to the bathroom anyway, to running out saying "Emergency" to volunteering to help w/bathroom during lunch time. Magicfan even posted an article on what parents and kids can do.

So, there is concern and care on this thread.

Yet you felt the need to defend yourself when you are not guilty of restricting bathroom access?

Why?

 

[Maleficent13]

Yet you felt the need to defend yourself when you are not guilty of restricting bathroom access?

Why?

Perhaps because she is being accused of being a "Teacher-God". I don't know, when I'm attacked I tend to defend myself, whether there is a need to or not. It's an automatic response.

I too don't understand what is with the continuous attacks on teachers lately.

And I didn't hear Daxx speak negatively about ANY child...just some parents.

 

[Daxx]

You make it sound like every child in your class is starving and has uncaring parents. It's probably a small minority. And, if you have such a negative attitude and have to refer to kids in a sarcastic, negative light, then why are you teaching at all? Maybe you should find another career. Or, go to an affluent neighborhood where the parents aren't too poor to feed thier kids.
If these kids are so ppor, don't they qualify for free school lunches? If that child is hungry, then they will eat. You teach at a Catholic school?

I teach at a Catholic school in a low-economic area of my city. We don't have free/reduced lunch at school. We don't have a kitchen in our cafeteria and, b/c of that, we don't get governmental lunch programs. There is nowhere to prep the food. No government lunch program, no free/reduced lunches. The school buys the lunch items and serves them. Mon. is take out subs, Tues. is hot dog day, Weds. is take-out-pizza day, Thurs. is nacho day and Fri. is grilled cheese day. Hot dogs and grilled cheese are made on on a griddle by volunteer moms. Nacho cheese is heated in a microwave and served w/salsa and chips. If a child gets a free lunch at school, it's b/c school pays for it.

I'm sorry if it sounds like my whole class is like this. That wasn't my intention. I just am "lumping" years. But, over the years, I have seen a rise. Five years ago, I'd have maybe one out of twelve underpriveledged children. Now, it has increased to prob. four out of every twelve that are underpriveledged. Of course, not every child in my class comes from these circumstances.

I don't see how I'm sarcastic about my students ... I love them like my own. I help out when I can, giving breakfast, getting used uniforms from upper class students, I have taken uniforms home to wash with my own laundry, I provide art supplies out-of-pocket for those who run out, etc I am not complaining ... but sometimes I wonder how many other teachers do this for their students. I suppose I could stop doing it ... but then that would mean I've stopped caring, wouldn't it?

It isn't that I have a negative attitude ... I think the same thing w/someone beotching about their office. They like the job, etc. but sometimes it might not seem like it when they blow off that steam. I think it's easy to come off sounding negative when you grouse about what's wrong rather than what is right.

Why don't I work in an affluent school? I love my school. I love my students and co-workers. I have taught in an affluent school and feel like I'm making more of a difference in my school. If I can get these kids a better start in their education, then maybetheir lives will change for the better.

 

[Daxx]

Yet you felt the need to defend yourself when you are not guilty of restricting bathroom access?

Why?

B/c on Wishing On A Star's post, s/he stated that nobody cared about this kid. I had to back that up w/some evidence and defend myself. Thank you very much.

MagicFan -- I am on leave due to appendectomy surgery that I had done last Tues. I have been given clearance to return mid-October but I'm going back on Monday. I am working on laptop from a tv tray in my bedroom. ETA- I am on the phone every day w/my school and the substitute teacher to be sure all my students needs are being met.

 

[magicfan]

That's a really, really nice story, RickinNYC. Every school should have teachers and a Principal that are that caring. And, I agree that teachers deserve a big thank you, but not ALL of them. There are some that should not be teaching and I do not (and did not earlier) mean that comment personally against anyone in particular. I just know from my own experiences. Some are absolutely wonderful, just like the one you spoke of.

 

[Talking Hands]

I am a temporary teacher and work at all grade levels. In the lower grades most of the classrooms I work in have a bathroom in the room. They have scheduled breaks and are free to use the bathroom at anytime except when the teacher is actually talking, giving instructions. As they get older they can get a pass at anytime except when the teaccher is lecturing or giving instructions.
In middle and high school, students are instructed to use the restroom during the 5 minutes passing time. The hardest is block scheduling as classes are 110 minutes long. As long as the student is working I will give a pass for the restroom as long as we don't get into a parade situation. Btw in high school with block scheduling on some days the only time the teacher will get for a restroom break is during their lunch. During passing you monitor the halls. Some teachers at high school will leave a note on the board saying no bathroom passes. I then used my own judgement as to whether or not to allow a student a pass.
I will say that a student walking out after being told no would get a detention in the school I work at the most. Be very careful when telling your chilkdren to defy authority. It sets a very back precident and it is your child that will suffer for it in the long run not you.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Perhaps because she is being accused of being a "Teacher-God". I don't know, when I'm attacked I tend to defend myself, whether there is a need to or not. It's an automatic response.

I too don't understand what is with the continuous attacks on teachers lately.

And I didn't hear Daxx speak negatively about ANY child...just some parents.

I didn't read where "she" was called that.

Maybe I misread--but I thought it a generalized statement.

She could have just easily said that not all teachers behave that way. But instead--went 100 steps past that.

The thread is about a young child prohibited from doing a biologically necessary thing that she had to do--the 2nd time it happened with a doctor's note.

Where is it appropriate to be sarcastic and self-appreciating in defense of a generalized statement?

The kid peed her pants TWICE and then was being told she MUST eat food that she didn't have any more room for.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

B/c on Wishing On A Star's post, s/he stated that nobody cared about this kid. I had to back that up w/some evidence and defend myself. Thank you very much.

The kid in the OP....nobody as in the staff at the school?

Do you work there?

Sorry to be blunt with you--but I'm still not seeing the place for your post as it relates to the OP and the problems at HER daughter's school.

 

[meandtheguys2]

I teach at a Catholic school in a low-economic area of my city. We don't have free/reduced lunch at school. We don't have a kitchen in our cafeteria and, b/c of that, we don't get governmental lunch programs. There is nowhere to prep the food. No government lunch program, no free/reduced lunches. The school buys the lunch items and serves them. Mon. is take out subs, Tues. is hot dog day, Weds. is take-out-pizza day, Thurs. is nacho day and Fri. is grilled cheese day. Hot dogs and grilled cheese are made on on a griddle by volunteer moms. Nacho cheese is heated in a microwave and served w/salsa and chips. If a child gets a free lunch at school, it's b/c school pays for it.

I'm sorry if it sounds like my whole class is like this. That wasn't my intention. I just am "lumping" years. But, over the years, I have seen a rise. Five years ago, I'd have maybe one out of twelve underpriveledged children. Now, it has increased to prob. four out of every twelve that are underpriveledged. Of course, not every child in my class comes from these circumstances.

I don't see how I'm sarcastic about my students ... I love them like my own. I help out when I can, giving breakfast, getting used uniforms from upper class students, I have taken uniforms home to wash with my own laundry, I provide art supplies out-of-pocket for those who run out, etc I am not complaining ... but sometimes I wonder how many other teachers do this for their students. I suppose I could stop doing it ... but then that would mean I've stopped caring, wouldn't it?

It isn't that I have a negative attitude ... I think the same thing w/someone beotching about their office. They like the job, etc. but sometimes it might not seem like it when they blow off that steam. I think it's easy to come off sounding negative when you grouse about what's wrong rather than what is right.

Why don't I work in an affluent school? I love my school. I love my students and co-workers. I have taught in an affluent school and feel like I'm making more of a difference in my school. If I can get these kids a better start in their education, then maybetheir lives will change for the better.

Daxx, you sound like an awesome force in your student's lives.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Some teachers at high school will leave a note on the board saying no bathroom passes. I then used my own judgement as to whether or not to allow a student a pass.
I will say that a student walking out after being told no would get a detention in the school I work at the most. Be very careful when telling your chilkdren to defy authority. It sets a very back precident and it is your child that will suffer for it in the long run not you.

With respect--how do they handle young women and an univited guest. I would hope that the "no pass" rule is very appropriately ignored. I can see how this can be abused...but I can remember a few choice times in school....let's just say the school would have been responsible for my humiliation if I was told I could not be excused to take care of matters.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Daxx--curious question that I have pondered for a while--how do children in a low income area afford a private school?

If some don't have food--what are they doing in your school out of curiousity?

 

[Maleficent13]

I think that when someone in a profession sees that profession attacked, there is a strong urge to defend themselves. I think this is a natural response. If I saw a thread attacking people in the medical profession, whether I was the actual medical professional being attacked or not, I know I would feel I needed to jump in and defend the profession. Especially when that profession is being as vehemently attacked as wishing on a star is doing.

As you pointed out, Daxx is not the teacher in question in the OP. Nor are the thousands of other teachers in the country. So attack the OP's lunch lady for having a god-complex if you want...but don't say all teachers have one.

That's really what I was trying to say. I guess I needed to say it more bluntly.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I will say I remember fondly in the 2nd grade when my teacher took a moment and brushed my hair until it was smooth and shiny for picture day.

It wasn't b/c my parents didn't have time in the morning--I suffer from stringy scraggly hair as does my oldest--brush it and within an hour or so it looks like we just woke up. But still it was with compassion that she took me from disheveled to radiant for picture day .

 

[Talking Hands]

With respect--how do they handle young women and an univited guest. I would hope that the "no pass" rule is very appropriately ignored. I can see how this can be abused...but I can remember a few choice times in school....let's just say the school would have been responsible for my humiliation if I was told I could not be excused to take care of matters.

I don't know how others handle it but I ignore the "no pass rule" I consider that an emergency. I also know several students with special needs (diabetes, wheelchair dependent, etc) that I will ignore the "no pass rule" for.
I know some of the high school girls have the guts to yell out that the have the "uninvited guest" and do it quite crudely but I prefer they don't need to do that. I've been at this particular high school since it opened 4 years ago so the kids know me except for the 9th graders and pretty much know as long as they are good I'm easy to get along with..

Oh, the OP's child should be allowed to go to the bathroom anytime she asked as she has a doctor's note to that effect. If necesary Mom should have a 504 written so that is required accommodation.