Lulu201's Healthy Living Log (comments welcome!)

[ZerasPride]

Hi Lulu!

I just caught up with all the goings on with you and your journal. First, I know I'm a bit late for the party but congratulations on reaching your WW goal!

As I read your progress, I wanted to cry, tears of joy for you but some tears of sadness for me. I always thought that reaching goal would mean something magical would happen in my life but you have shown me that if I want magic and changes, I have to make those things happen, losing weight isn't some magical happening that will make everything alright. I will still have the same bills, same job and frankly the same "me" that I see in the mirror everyday. I needed that reality check. Thanks so much for sharing your feelings with those of us still striving to reach that place called goal.

I know you can get to your eventual destination, whatever weight that may be. I have decided that when I can wear a particular size, then I am at goal. I am going to try not to let a number on the scale dictate things to me. If I can wear a size 10 and weigh 190 pounds then that's where I'm stopping. Now, of couse, I know I'll need to be much smaller than that to wear a size 10 but I think you know what mean.

I've rambled on your journal too long. I just really want you to know how very very proud I am of all that you have accomplished and all that you will accomplish. You are such an asset to WISH and a true inspiration! Please keep up the fantastic work!!!

 

[septbride2002]

Don't you hate it when you lose a nice long post! Very frustrating! Have a great day today Erin!

~Amanda

 

[Strings]

Erin,

You must be one proud Mama. The concert sounds fabulous. I hope your day goes well. Your plan for the day looks good.

Beth

 

[lulu201]

Good morning! Uh, wait, need a little more . OK, the truth: I need a LOT more!

OK, now I'm ready to start the day.

Yeah, feeling more than a little tired today, but I'm willing to ride the wave into the DZONE. I'm going to pack a healthy lunch to take to work and goodness knows, I've been on this cruiseline before, so I'll just wish myself a bon voyage and set sail.

Thank you all for checking in. Lisa Z., to you. Like you, I'm faced with those same bills and same issues that I had before, but you know what? The "me" has changed--and the change has been more than physical. I think I have a new sense of myself--more belief in my abilities and in my personal God-given strength. This healthy living journey has changed me and while there are aspects of the day to day that are all the same as before, there is a difference in life now. Maybe it's just in the small things--moving without pain and discomfort, catching glimpses of myself in a mirror, seeing the twinkle in my DH's eye, not being uncomfortable around people I haven't see in awhile (I'm not wondering if they're assessing my weight in a negative way), but the differences are all there. I have some of those "what will I do" questions when I finally settle on a goal weight range--it's been fun to get new clippies and to strive for the changes--will I find the same satisfaction in staying the same?? But then I figure I'll just set up new challenges and goals for myself to celebrate. I've got to keep having those clippie parties! For me, hitting the WW goal was a celebration (thanks, WISH buddies) AND a let down--but maybe that's what happens when you achieve anything big. From the holiday let downs we all experience after Christmas, to the settling in after a wedding, to the moving to a new house--the emphasis for me has to be more on enjoying the journey and not just the destination itself. It's turning the clippie back to day #1, it's eating the oatmeal for breakfast. . .it's coming here to the WISH to start the day.

Uh-oh, I'm getting deep before I've had my coffee. . .always a dangerous thing.

Stats from yesterday:

1. Vitamins 28/31
2. Water 27/31
3. Exercise 24/31
4. Food 25/31 used one flex (I didn't eat dinner until 9 p.m. and used a point for some fruit salad)

Plan for today:

1. Take the vitamins.
2. Drink at least 64 oz. of water
3. Exercise one mile on the treadie
4. Food--23.5 points (22T, 1AP, .5 flex)
b--will be oatmeal and coffee=5
l--pb sandwich or tuna salad w/veggies=5
d--2 chicken taco supreme=10
McDonald's lowfat vanilla cone=3.5

Keeping my eyes open for the joy in the day. . .
Erin

Edit: 1. Check , 2. 10 oz. so far, 3. Check 4. Had 5.

 

[DoeWDW]

My deep-thinking WISH-sis Erin,

We focus so much on our goal. We yearn for it, we work long and tirelessly to attain it, we achieve it,.....and then what?? You're right, it's a part of all life's big events. I struggle with it to some extent after every Disney trip. In a way, I'm dreading the half marathon, because I know this same feeling will hit me.

But every time I worry about those feelings, I look at the alternative. If I never set any goals, if I never try, then what kind of a life would that be? Would I be happier? I know I wouldn't.

When I look back on my life, it is the big events I remember, the big achievements I'm proud of. I don't remember those feelings afterward. I think the time after is a time to regroup, to recharge and to search for the next goal, to come to terms with all you've achieved and the hard work it took to get there, to look at how you've changed and grown in the process.

That's what it's about, right? It isn't about the achievement as much as it's about how we've had to grow and stretch and challenge ourselves to attain it. We're better people, wiser and stronger, just because we set the goal and strived to achieve it. We can feel better about ourselves because we went the distance and didn't give up in the face of obstacles.

Oh my, now I've gotten all philosophical in your journal. Thanks, though, for the opportunity to reflect on what it means to set our goals and then work toward them. There are times when I wonder why I do it? Why not just live moment to moment and forget about this goal stuff that can be so hard! Now I think I see - it's not about the goal, it's about discovering a better me!

I wish you a peaceful happy day filled with laughter and smiles and blessings.

Love and

 

[lulu201]

, Doreen. Thank you so much for expressing your thoughts and sharing them with me here in my journal. I'll be carrying them in my heart all day.

Love,
Erin

 

[marsh0013]

i know i'm very very late for the party too, but i have to add my congratulations! erin, i know you are still continuing on your journey, and i know it will be one that you never end, and even if this is just your "first" goal, i'm so proud of you for making it!

can i just tell you how i love to come to your journal and read out your menu plan for the day? and let me explain why. i always think, ooh, maybe erin will switch it up today and *not* have oatmeal...and then i think to myself...self, are you crazy? erin will *always* have oatmeal for breakfast. you're the one that got me started on my favorite breakfast (pb/banana oatmeal), and i think the world would start spinning in the opposite direction if you skipped oatmeal one day

so keep eating that oatmeal, and keep taking good care of you, you deserve it

 

[Strings]

Wow Erin,

Today must be one of those reflective days, huh? Both you and Doe made wonderful statements about attaining a goal. I hope that one day, I will be struggling with the same problem. I do think I will be celebrating for a few weeks at least. You've made some amazing changes in your life and self. Savor them.

I hope you have a fabulous Tuesday.


Beth

 

[septbride2002]

Good Morning Erin! Your post is so right on this morning! I have found in my life that I am always setting goals - I tend to also become way to focused on those goals. LOL! I'm a business major- what can I say! My friends have told me that they can tell when I don't have a project to focus on because I tend to get antsy. When you decide on a goal and reach it you will just have to come up with a new goal! Maybe it will be to run a full marathon! Maybe it will be to read one book every month, maybe it will be to join a softball team, volleyball team, or some other sport.

~Amanda

 

[lulu201]

Hello, it's WEDNESDAY! I'm having a bit of a hard time getting my pre-coffee thoughts together, but here goes nothing:

First, my stats from yesterday.

1. Vitamins--29/31
2. Water--28/31
3. Exercise-25/31
4. Food--26/31 Stayed on plan. All I can say is, thank you, God for sugar-free jello. It was a lifesaver last night when I got home from choir last night at 9:30.

My weight loss has been getting quite a bit of attention lately. People have asked me all kinds of questions and made all kinds of comments, from wondering if I have cancer to telling me I'm "half the woman I used to be." One that struck me, though, was a comment yesterday from one of our teachers. She said, "it looks like you're working really hard. You really have to learn to say 'no," don't you? I thought about that for a minute and told her I didn't feel that way anymore--at least I don't at the moment, anyway. I feel like staying on plan and eating in a healthy way is EASIER than having to fight with food and make never-ending decisions re: "should I eat this, should I not. . ." I also find that WW is so flexible. Heck, if I can eat a Cinnabon on a "diet," I can't complain, you know what I'm saying?? This way of healthy eating is a workable structure for my life and one I'm grateful for. There's something in the "Thin Tastes Better" book that refers to the liberation of food control. . .I'll have to find that and quote it here.

Enough now. I'm feeling an extreme time crunch this week, so I'm sorry I'm not getting around to journals much--even less than usual. I know, however, that you're all understanding of this, and I appreciate it immensely.

The plan:

1. Vitamins
2. Water--LOTS
3. Exercise--1-2 treadie miles
4. Food--22T, 1 or 2 AP; trying to save flex for the weekend when I'm traveling to get my mom--there'll be lots of restaurant eating.

,
Erin:

Edit at 9:35 or so:

Dashing out to make my 10 a.m. class. Hi, Beth and Doreen. Thanks for your messages this morning. 1. , 2. 3 glasses so far, 3. , 4. Oatmeal and coffee =5

 

[DoeWDW]

Good morning!

Your attitude sounds sunny and bright in spite of all the demands on your time this week! You are truly walking the healthy living walk and lots of people are noticing!! If you can do it, so can I!!

I'm not sure I've gotten to that part of the Thin Tastes Better book about the liberation of food control - I've gotten sidetracked with reading "Interview with the Vampire" by Anne Rice (a bizarre book ). I'll be delving back into it tonight, though, and looking for that concept. Does it tell me how to quiet the voice from the EVM??

I'm sending extra and some energy-enhanced to help you get through your busy day!

 

[Strings]

Hey there,

I just thought that I would drop by to give you some extra and for your extremely busy week. Don't worry about journals. Take care of you, and Mickey , instead. I hope you have a good day, despite the schedule.

Beth

 

[septbride2002]

Good Morning Erin! I love it when people notice my weight loss! I've had a lot of people say that to me as well - you must get tired of saying no alot. And yes it does and every now and then you slip - but I find it easier getting back on program now then I ever did before! Because I like the foods that I can eat on this program! I really don't feel deprived all that often.

I need to check out that book from the library and give it a read!

Have a great day Erin!

~Amanda

 

[marsh0013]

hey erin, that is so great that people are noticing your loss, how's that for motivation

i'm so glad that you are loving your woe! the fact that it's just seeming so easy for you right now is a real inspiration. you really seem to have found a balance with your food...fitting in things that you enjoy (ie, cinnabon), but still making your points. that really is great about ww. the way you are talking about it is making me almost think i want to start counting points again...almost

anyway, i hope your busy day goes well and that you find some time to relax

 

[Castillo Mom]

Good morning! I was reading through the last few journal entries you've made. Such deep thoughts, something that's been on my mind as well which I mentioned to Lisa Z the other day. As I get closer to goal, I'm feeling a little scared, but I can't quite put my finger on why. Maybe I'm afraid I'll gain the weight back. Oh well, something to continue pondering.

Wow, so you can have Cinnabon on WW? Cool! Haven't had one of those in about a year. On Atkins maintenance, you can have the occasional sugar-laden treat, but of course I would have to keep those items minimum. But hey, this has to be a lifetime of making good food choices and nothing wrong with having that treat every now and then. Otherwise, how would we stick to it?

Hope you're surviving the D-zone this week. Take care Erin, and thanks for cheering me on!

 

[lulu201]

Did I say this was feeling easy? Well, let me take a moment and eat those words--and everything else that isn't nailed down. . .

Yesterday I fell apart, big time. I made it until 8:30 and then I sought comfort in every food item in the kitchen. I binged. BUT, I know why I binged and though I'm not proud of it, I accept it and I'm going to just try to grow and then let it go!

I was stressed--really stressed. I had the strangest day--from the parent who brought her BOYFRIEND to my toddler class (and I quote: "It's so convenient to have an affair with your neighbor") and then retold the events of the previous evening as I was teaching ("my husband locked me out so I had to climb through the bathroom window, but I had thought that might happen, so I had rigged it") to difficulties with a teacher. Lesson plans due at 9 a.m. still aren't done, the dust in the guest room (soon to be my mom's room) is an inch thick, PMS is raging. . .AGH!

But you know what? It's all good. In between all the STUFF were many special, happy moments with other children and families. DH and I are supporting each other through the craziness. . .it'll all work out. Unfortunately, I fell off the wagon, but is that anything new????? Nope, I'm just going to dust myself off and get back on.

Final stats from March:

1. Vitamins: 30/31-96%
2. Water: 28/31-I just didn't have time to get it all down. 90%
3. Exercise: 26/31--83%
4. Food: 26/31--83%

I didn't have any specific goals to hit, but I can say I'm pleased with my percentages. There is certainly room for improvement, but this is the best I've ever done. I've learned a lot this month--I even learned how stressed I have to be to resort to a binge!
Lucky me, now I can work on that!

Today my plan is just to hang in there!

1. Vitamins
2. Water
3. Exercise--honestly don't know if I'll get to this. It depends on how fast I get my lessons typed.
4. Food--the day opens with me taking a friend to breakfast (no music at the preschool today) at "The Talking Teacup." I know it'll be some kind of quiche, but I'm not sure what else. I'm not too good when I have trouble figuring out the points, but I'll do my best. I'm going to try to eat light today so I have at least a slight chance of hitting my April goal at weigh-in tomorrow, but it's not looking good.

So, in conclusion. . .yep, I'm loving my program until I'm stressed out and and reaching for medicinal carbs (specifically popcorn and triscuits)! Definitely something to work on for April.
I might be late in getting these goals down on paper--after breakfast I have to clean everything in sight and then head to work until 8 p.m. I'll try to get back before tomorrow, but I doubt it.

to everyone. I appreciate your comments and support; I'm going to visit everyone's journals as soon as the dust settles (but with the dust I have, it could be awhile yet. ).

Erin

 

[DoeWDW]

My dearest WISH-sis Erin,

I am sending lots of your way! Can you feel them???? You are under so much stress lately AND in the middle of the D-Zone - a little binge is perfectly understandable.

You may even feel the need for a couple extra medicinal carbs today. Girlfriend, if that's what it takes to help you get through the day, then I say go for it! Do NOT stress out over your food along with everything else today. You and I both know that these feelings are temporary and in a few more days you won't even WANT the medicinal carbs anymore.

You'll come through all this just fine, in time. Try to ride the wave as best you can but please do not try to be "perfect" with food and exercise along with trying to resolve everything else. If you want some exercise, put on some good music and dance away your stress for a few minutes - that counts just as much as the treadie and will release those stress-reducing endorphins, as well as soothing your soul!

I'm so glad you're finding strength in DH and savoring the happy moments in your day, despite all that's happening. You are dealing with things in a very healthy manner and I'm so very proud of you! I'll be saying extra prayers for your day today - do you think guardian angels dust?? It can't hurt for me to ask, right??

I'm wishing you peace and love today!

 

[Strings]

Erin,

Your binge of last night is totally understandable. You are STRESSED OUT! Throw Dzone in there and you have a recipe for disaster. You can ride this wave today, but you certainly don't have to be perfect. You are the one who wrote about not dwelling on a binge, Just move on. You'll be back OP and living the healthy life in no time.

Congrats on those stats. You did a great job last month. Focus on the positives you have done this year.

,
Beth

 

[septbride2002]

I would have binged too! OH! MY! GOODNESS! I can't believe someone would have the nerve to bring her boyfriend to a classroom where her kids are!

You did great on your goals in the month of March! Way to go! Be sure to reward yourself for what you did!

~Amanda

 

[DoeWDW]

Today is a busy one for you, Lulu! I'm sending many , plenty of and an extra helping of to help you.

I'll also be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, as always.

"Lean on me when you're not strong, I'll help you carry on.
We all need somebody to lean on."

Love ya, WISH-sis :happy1:
Doe-Doe