Let your daughter spend night with friend...only Dad home?

[Cantw8]

No way..men have penises=molesters

 

[low-key]

No way..men have penises=molesters

 

[mikie1011]

not always true you cant say all men are like that my daddy would never hurt no one thats kinda mean too say why do you say that a women can do bad things too but my mom would never let us go too someones house if the mom was not home i agree that part but not all mean are bad people

 

[DopeyDame]

Some people have issues with men. DD has occasionally had a friend not allowed to stay here because of DS... just the mere fact of having a teenage boy in the house is unacceptable to some parents, as though he's anything but annoyed by his little sister and her friends. I've learned to roll with it. I find it sad that some people feel the need to be that suspicious, but in the end I can't make their paranoia my problem.

Oh that makes me so sad. I have a son and a daughter. They're both still little, but the thought of my daughter having friends who couldn't come over because of my son... kind of makes me want to throw up. Or punch someone.

 

[Mizzoufan]

Not on a blimp on my radar

 

[Arielle22]

Both my DDs had friends who lived primarily with their dads. Older DD's friend's dad was a widower so no woman at all in the picture. Younger DD's friend since kindergarten alternated between parents' homes but primarily with Dad. We never gave it a thought that we were leaving our DDs with men. We knew the fathers and knew they were trustworthy.

When I was working weekends, DH would allow DDs to have friends over. No one ever declined based on it being only DH.

There is a woman who works in another business on the same floor as my company who hates men. If she sees a male walking down the communal hallway, she plasters herself to the wall and mutters under her breath. Not sure what her issue is but she looks ridiculous.

 

[Wish I lived in Fl]

The low view some women have of dads is disturbing.

My husband is the one worrying in our family. He will not let our DD stay overnight if only parent is a divorced Dad. Nor if parent is a Divorced Mom with a live in boyfriend.

 

[ELSA711]

Wouldn't even cross my mind. My BFF had her mom walk out on the family while we were in kindergarten. I slept over her house pretty much every other weekend from first grade to fifth grade.
Having children myself, as long as we know the family and my kids are comfortable with it. I'm good! My kindergartener just went and had a play date (not sleepover) with two of her friends with only dad on watch. Mom was out of town, didn't even cross my mind to be worried. I would however question why the mutual friend would say something like that.

 

[Vijoge]

As wife to an amazing dad and mom to an awesome son, this makes me sad.

As wife to an amazing Grandpa (who happens to be a better "mother" than most women) it makes me freaking angry!

 

[DawnM]

If I knew the father well enough, I would be ok with it. But that goes for BOTH parents. I need to know people before I let my kids go spend the night.

 

[ilovejack02]

My parent's did not allow me to spend night at one certain friend's house . Her Mom was divorced and there was an older teenage boy in the house . We were 13 and he was prob 17, I never understood until I had my own children. I allowed my oldest to sleep at a friend's house several times. The friend slept at our place too , knew the parents and trusted them. Turns out my DS15 at the time was having a sexual relationship with the Mom's dd who was 17 . It was his friend's stepsister . It didn't even cross my mind to think about something happening like that . Lesson learned . As far as a Dad being alone with daughters and friends, as long as I knew them really well I would be fine with it. Because of our problems with our oldest , I am more careful with letting my youngest spend the night out, but doesn't mean I would message a friend and question their decisions or give a no every time he asks to sleep out. There is a Dr James Dobson that wrote a compelling article on why not to let your kids sleep away from home several years ago. Gives you something to think about for sure. I don't want to raise my youngest in a bubble , but I am much more careful now . I thought I was careful the first time around, but even more so now.

 

[mi*vida*loca]

Some people have issues with men. DD has occasionally had a friend not allowed to stay here because of DS... just the mere fact of having a teenage boy in the house is unacceptable to some parents, as though he's anything but annoyed by his little sister and her friends. I've learned to roll with it. I find it sad that some people feel the need to be that suspicious, but in the end I can't make their paranoia my problem.

As a rule my kids don't have sleepovers anywhere unless it's family or very close friends of mine. I'm not friends with my kids friends parents and I don't know any of the moms at school so I would never let them stay somewhere that I don't know the people personally.

This may be cultural. I'm Latina and in my neighborhood growing up NO ONE had sleepovers. You slept at your cousins house and that was IT. Or at grandma's with your cousins. Friend sleepovers were unheard of.

I don't let my DS have sleepovers at a friends house that has teenage girls for my sons protection. I don't need a teenage girl blaming my DS for something. Not because I think my DS is a sexual deviant. I guess I watch too much Law and Order.

 

[DVC-Don]

Such an odd thing to do. My husband was a stay at home dad to my twins (boy and girl) for the first 6 years of their lives. He often hosted other people's children when I wasn't there. That's part of the gig of a stay at home parent. Good grief.

He's not a child molester. He's not a rapist. He's a solid guy with his head screwed on straight.

I too was a stay at home dad for my two children from 1992 to 2000. One thing became obvious was that during the day when my wife was not home, other kids in the neighborhood were not allowed by their moms to play in or at our house but my kids could go to theirs. We were also never invited to "go to the park" days. We'd run into them at the park, but the moms kept their distance. Funny thing was most of the kids were allowed to attend sleep overs on the weekend when they knew my wife would be home. But heck, my wife made three times what I did so it was a no brainer who got to stay home.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

We are all monsters, apparently.

 

[Allison]

My husband is the one worrying in our family. He will not let our DD stay overnight if only parent is a divorced Dad. Nor if parent is a Divorced Mom with a live in boyfriend.

What is wrong with a divorced dad? Do they have cooties or something?

 

[Goofy_Disney_Dad]

What is wrong with a divorced dad? Do they have cooties or something?

Is that what they're calling "it" now?

 

[anneboleyn]

Eh, I can't hold it against them for showing concern. We live in a society where people do horrible things to children. They were just making sure the parent was aware of the situation so that they could decide if they still wanted to send their daughter over.

 

[tehniqi]

I was raised by a single father after my mother died and many of my friends couldn't stay the night growing up unless my auntie was staying with us.

It's kind of depressing that these negative views of men continue to persist today :/

 

[kimblebee]

Eh, I can't hold it against them for showing concern. We live in a society where people do horrible things to children. They were just making sure the parent was aware of the situation so that they could decide if they still wanted to send their daughter over.

Do you think they warn the OP when only the mom is home? Do you think they should?

 

[anneboleyn]

Do you think they warn the OP when only the mom is home? Do you think they should?

If they are uncomfortable with their kids being around moms and think that it is worth being brought up, then sure.

When I was a child, I was wearing a c-cup bra the summer before 7th grade. Some of my friends' dads were creepy and awful to me and would "accidentally" walk in on in me in the bathroom or bedrooms. I had to stop going over there and it basically ended a few friendships. So I don't blame people who may be distrustful.

They say 1 in 4 girls are molested. That is cause for concern. Who can blame them for speaking out so the parent knew?