I think that we owe you all some hearty hugs, and a HUGE THANK YOU for all of your thoughts and prayers!!
We won.
And it's all thanks to the ACLU!! (ETA: AND a heck of a lot of pixie dust! LOL)
Here's what went down (It's sort of scattered, so hopefully it won't be too confusing)...
Tuesday, Jen got the call from a worker at our licensing agency. She was asking her lots of questions about how the placement originally happened. Who called? What did they say? Who all did she talk to on that day? Was anything said about this or that? Basically without saying it (bacause she couldn't), she was hinting to Jen that something was up and that we may want to prepare ourselves to lose the baby.
There was already a routine family support team meeting scheduled for yesterday afternoon. So the original plan of the supervisor (from the agency who made the placement) was to blindside Jen at the meeting, (right in front of the bio parents, the case workers, the guardian ad litem, the juvenile officer, etc.) with the information that the baby was being removed from our home.
Since our worker was never supposed to say anything about it to Jen in the first place, the supervisor thought she could get away with shocking her with it at the meeting.
It was very fortunate that our worker did clue us in on the situation, or we wouldn't have had the time we needed to get ahold of the ACLU. When Jen finally did speak with the supervisor, she asked about a decision making meeting, and the supervisor said that the decision was ultimately up to the agency, and that the decision had already been made. She would be removed from our home within the week.
Well, it turns out that the decision is VERY MUCH NOT up to the agency, and that just about everything in the way this woman was handling the situation was against the law! Our attorney from the ACLU cited 6 (possibly 7) grievances that would be filed against both the agency and the state should they choose to pursue the matter.
About an hour before the meeting, the attorney faxed a letter (on ACLU letterhead!
) to all of the parties involved. In the letter, he noted all of the laws regarding the case, cited all of the above grievances that would be filed, and stated in no uncertain terms that he was prepared to represent us in this case should the need arise. (Go lawyer, it's your birthday...
) (Who ended up getting blindsided?!?!?
)
So Jen gets to the meeting, and boy has the tune changed!!
The bottom line is that the case is being moved out of the religiously affiliated agency and into an unbiased city agency where we cannot and will not be discriminated against.
There were obviously several laws being broken by this woman and by her agency, but it turns out that the biggest deciding factor was that being a religious organization, they DID have the right to discriminate against us BEFORE the placement was made. Had they read through our home study (like they were supposed to) before they placed her with us, they would have known about our sexual orientation, and they could have denied us placement. But since they didn't read it, and they placed her with us, it was basically too late. Their "window of opportunity" had closed.
It's scary to think that if we hadn't been on our game, and if we hadn't questioned all of this, they could have gotten away with taking her away from us!
For a split second, we thought that the agency was perfectly within their rights to have her taken away. I'd hate to think about how many same sex couples could have been duped into thinking they had no rights in this situation.
We have been advised to keep in touch with the attorney, because we could still file suit against the agency if we choose to. We're actually considering it, mostly for posterity's sake. We figure if we bring a suit against them on these matters, it may make it a little more difficult for them to try to get away with this crap in the future.
Jen and I were discussing last night the possibilty of becoming some sort of advocates for LGBT foster/adoptive parents. We really didn't know where to turn when we were first hit with this. We felt helpless and alone, and although there were ultimately people out there who could help us, it took hours and hours of calling to find those people. It would have been nice to have just one organization in place to help us find the resources we needed.
I have a few more gray hairs, but it's worth it. We're not losing the baby, and she'll be with us at least until the next hearing in May.
We're heaving a GREAT BIG sigh of relief!!
Thanks again everyone!
-Christal
The adoption process as a whole is really warped, imho, and that's just one example.
