Is this school "punishment" acceptable?

[In a hurry]

So correct! By not instilling high behavior standards when they are young, you just set the rest of their teachers up for poor behavior if they don't supply bigger and better stuff.

 

[VSL]

It's a real world system.

In the real world you're far more likely to be punished for doing something wrong rather than rewarded for doing something good (or behaving in a way that is expected of you). These kids are just being taught that. Simple.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Ohhhh good gracious...

Another School-Discipline-Teacher-Parent thread gone amok!!!!

Like a name on a board, or a Nemo Sticker, are really going to make or break a child!!


Stick a fork in this, it's done!

 

[DisneyLovingMama]

Stick a fork in this, it's done!

 

[bianca]

It is so true that the quest for bigger rewards never ends. In our case, as I explained in my earlier post, the youngest (adopted) daughter is rewarded endlessly for everything she does in her special-ed class. Her teacher goes so far as to give her candy if she will just be quiet for 5 minutes while she teaches!! Of course, DD has been trained now to expect this kind of reward continually and it is a problem. She is rewarded every day with "points" that can be spent in the points store on Fridays if she has less than 3 time-outs on that day. However, she can have as many as 26 (that is her record) time-outs any day the rest of the week. Amazingly, she never has any time-outs on Fridays ....... hmmmmm. I am informed at every parent-teacher conference how brilliant she is and that her IQ is right within normal range for her grade level. Yet, she is rewarded at every turn and then expects it at home. THIS IS WHERE THE PROBLEM BEGINS! In our home, we refuse to play these games. Our older daughters have always helped a lot around the house ...... sometimes with rewards and sometimes without. They are able to see the advantage of "family" efforts to make things run smoothly, while youngest daughter is not. I attribute this largely to how she is being "trained" at school. We are curious as to how she will function next year when she is moved to middle school and the incentives start to dwindle. We have tried incentives with youngest DD, but we have yet to find an incentive large enough to make her clean her room (her only "chore" at age 12). There is the additional problem that with any kind of consequence for not behaving at home, she immediately runs to school where she proceeds to tell her school social worker (that she sees bi-weekly) how unfair "it" all is. Of course, social worker at school FIRMLY believes that there must be several reward systems in place to keep her going, henceforth, our on-going circle of frustration.

Whatever happened to just following the rules? There are consequences everywhere in life. Seems to me that it is better to learn this at age 5 for not raising your hand and getting your name on the board, than when you're an adult and can be thrown in jail for your offense.

EDITED: While I was typing this, apparently this thread got "done". Sorry for the redundancy!