IS IT REALLY SO HARD TO TEACH YOUR KID HOW TO BEHAVE IN A RESTAURANT?

[sdsatl]

You should, they are great fun! They rival the breastfeeding threads and the "boys in the ladies room." We actually haven't had one in a good, long while.

Oh, junk. I still take my son (6) with me to the bathroom. I'd like to see that debate (for my own education).

 

[Disney Doll]

What do you do if they scream at the top of their lungs? Put your hand over their mouth? If they writhe and kick and scream with tremendous force and determination? Sit here and pin them down with both you and your husbands hands? Getting hurt in the process and possibly hurting your child in the process? Do other patrons want to see and hear this?

And then after doing all that what is you had to repeat for over 30 restraunt visits in a row?

You don't take a child who behaves like that to a restaurant in the first place. They don't belong there.

 

[Planogirl]

I think people with one child who happens to be easy will usually be quick to pass judgment. I have the perspective of having 3 kids, 2 of which are as different as night and day. I figured out a long time ago how different kids just are, so I no longer pass judgments like that.

I do however feel free to pass judgment on parents who encourage poor behavior or subject others to it in a public place (restaurant, shop, etc.).

I only have one and he was pretty easy but even the easy kids have their moments. I still wouldn't subject others to any of that.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

Are you complaining about there being loud kids at a restaurant in WDW that caters to families/children and literally has real life representations of cartoons come out to meet them? Surely you can't be serious?

Where did I say "loud"? I said hooligans.

Food ground into the floor. Kids going over to other people's tables to see characters. Reaching in front of you at the buffet. Just general rude behavior.

And yes, it's for little kids. And my kids aren't little anymore. Therefore, we aren't going back.

 

[Christine]

First time in a long, long time I am accused of being sensitive. But whatever. The poster you quoted isn't the one who opened the door. Maybe you needed to reprimand the folks who brought it up in the first place.

No need to reprimand that original poster. She/he was not debating on whether to spank or not nor making a judgement about it. That poster stated they would smack their child's mouth or butt if they misbehaved. It was another poster who decided to comment on how wrong physical violence (spanking/smacking) was against children and decided to make a judgement on that. To each their own--I just commended that I didn't think this thread was the place for a spanking debate when all that was being offered was different opinions on how people control (or don't control) their kids in restaurants. It certainly is a good topic on its own merits.

 

[Turn the Page]

Not that I would care but most parents today will not smack their kids in the mouth or on the butt in public for fear of do-gooders calling CPS on them in the middle of a restaurant.

Have you ever been on a smacking/spanking thread on the DIS? Ugly. Makes anyone afraid physically disciplining a child. So, while many parents of kids who act up might be inclined to agree with you, most will not actually go through with that in public.

CPS asks about that too. We have to deal with CPS now because my stepdaughter came back from her mothers house the day before Memorial Day with a black eye saying "Mommy hit me." During their "investigation" the first thing they asked us was if we ever used any physical punishment.

Believe me, CPS is not someone you want to have to deal with if you don't have to.

 

[MrsCobraBubbles]

I notice similar behavior now in the local library.

Lol! My library is a designated Family Place Library. We encourage children to come in and play. Well, I say "we" but I'm not employed there anymore. I wrote (and won!) a grant to purchase thousands of dollars in toys to create a play area. Many libraries are tolerating more noise lately, as our demographic is changing with the times. We don't get very many patrons coming in to the library looking for a quiet place to study. More often, it's families coming in to borrow a few movies for the week, adults and children using the library computers or bringing their own laptop to use our wifi, kids playing with the many, many toys in the children's area, seniors hanging out in the cafe area and chatting over a cup of coffee, and you can hear laughter echoing up from the meeting rooms in the basement. Many public libraries are more of a community gathering place now. The people who need quiet are relegated to two soundproofed study rooms.

 

[MrsCobraBubbles]

It can be a challenge, honestly. My son is 7 and he doesn't always behave but he has legitimate issues with behavior. I try my hardest and if doesn't work then we leave.

This though is an entirely different problem. That woman was encouraging it and she's going to have a real mess on her hands shortly.

I try to never judge a parent who is trying to control their child in a difficult situation. Even if I don't agree with how they are doing it, or I think another way would be more effective, they are at least trying. But people like that who aren't doing a thing...or even worse are encouraging it. Sorry about you...

I agree. And you can't win, no matter what parenting decisions you make someone will find fault. My son has ASD, he was more prone to meltdowns in public places than typical kids, but handheld electronics helped him (and us) stay sane and allowed us to stay in a restaurant long enough to enjoy our meals and maybe even order dessert. You would not believe how many times we received nasty looks or worse, rude comments, from strangers. I understand that many people do not welcome electronics at the dinner table, we don't either when we are at home, but I fail to see how what my family is doing at our table is anyone else's business, as long as we are being quiet and keeping to ourselves.

I'd guess that the mom in the OP was so enamored of her son that she assumed everyone else around her would be equally delighted and entertained by his performance. As I've made my career out of working with kids and parents I've seen plenty of that.

 

[Boopuff]

I work with special needs kids every day. It's surprising watching parents with kids. Sometimes our students do not want to come to school. Pitch a fit getting out of the car... you get the picture. And what the parents do (I mean don't do) is be forceful. They start this "reasoning" "negotiating" "jonny if you get out of the car I'll give you a Happy Meal! Come on darling! Ms. Smith is waiting... " (this goes on forever....) If these parents would just say "ok Jonny we're getting out of the car...1,2,3" and get him out! Guess who has control!! So many parents give all the control to their kids. My job totally helped me be a stronger parent. My oldest DD has ADD and couldn't sit still to save her soul. At home she was allowed to stand during meals but she learned to stay at the table. When we went to a restaurant, she'd sit long enough to select her meal. Then either DH or I would take a stroll when the meal arrived, we ate. Then another post-meal stroll. As she got older she could sit longer, and I always had my "bag of tricks" now mind you this is all pre-cell phone, iPad era! (parents allowing full-on volume now is a whole other discussion..) But it's all about common curtesy...

 

[Maxpowers]

haha that's precisely what I was thinking about.

 

[DawnM]

Ridiculous!

If your alley is that bad, you should drive and not subject the rest of us to having to give up our peanuts. I fly specifically FOR the peanuts.

Peanuts on airplanes!

 

[lustergirl]

First time in a long, long time I am accused of being sensitive. But whatever. The poster you quoted isn't the one who opened the door. Maybe you needed to reprimand the folks who brought it up in the first place.

That poster would be me (I am the one that originally said a smack on the butt, not the mouth would work.) Guess I opened a can of worms?

 

[Maxpowers]

Food ground into the floor.

I'd say that's more on Disney to clean it up faster. While I understand that throwing food on the floor is not okay behavior, you can't expect a bunch of excited kids to be neat and clean while eating.

Kids going over to other people's tables to see characters

While I won't condone this behavior, I can understand it from a little kid. I mean Mickey in real life has just come out to meet people. MICKEY! The one from TV!

Reaching in front of you at the buffet.

This is just plan rude and totally unacceptable.

 

[Kathryn777]

I have three kids and getting my oldest to behave (he's 8) was a nightmare. Yes, I totally judge other people if they take their kids in restaurants and don't bother to teach them to wait or be quiet. When my 2 year old gets going, we take him out of the earshot of (most) guests, do a timeout and head back in. He is getting much better. I would muuuuch rather see a parent carrying out a kid hitting them and kicking and screaming than giving in to behavior (like the drumming) just to keep their kid from having a tantrum

 

[littleblackegg]

You should, they are great fun! They rival the breastfeeding threads and the "boys in the ladies room." We actually haven't had one in a good, long while.

I am full of comedy GOLD when it comes to self-righteous breast feeding discussions. I once almost gave myself a stroke!

 

[littleblackegg]

Oh, junk. I still take my son (6) with me to the bathroom. I'd like to see that debate (for my own education).

At this point in history, I honestly do not care who is in the ladies room. As long as there is TP, hand soap, and no sprinkle on the seat, I am good to go. I could come out of that stall and see an entire men's soccer team and I wouldn't bat an eyelash.

 

[slo]

I didn't read the whole thread, but from what I read in the OP, it just adds to my irritation with this whole "it's all about me" society we've become.

People like the mom the OP was venting about drive me crazy.
Our society is so selfish and that selfishness is so contagious.
More and more people are getting like this - I hate it!!!

 

[Reighngold]

Before I was a mom I rolled my eyes at these people, now that I'm a mom I have grown to hate them. They are why my incredibly well behaved child gets nasty looks when we go into a restaurant. Never mind she behaves like a dream and I'm all over her making sure she is appropriate. These kinds of parents make it so ALL kids are viewed as pains.

 

[slo]

Amen @Reighngold!!!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I'd say that's more on Disney to clean it up faster. While I understand that throwing food on the floor is not okay behavior, you can't expect a bunch of excited kids to be neat and clean while eating.
Yes I do expect a bunch of excited kids to be neat and clean while eating. That is called teaching your kids manners. When I am excited I don't fling my food all over.



While I won't condone this behavior, I can understand it from a little kid. I mean Mickey in real life has just come out to meet people. MICKEY! The one from TV!

Then you wait your turn. You (a general you) need to keep your kids at your own table and wait until Mickey or whoever comes to you. The end. There is no excuse except rudeness to think it is okay to let your child go hang around someone else's table.

This is just plan rude and totally unacceptable.

I agree.