Help! School Troubles!

[cindermomma]

Regarding "eat everything on your plate" rule, they give kids with special learning needs exceptions all the time, i.e, they don't get timed on tests, or they only get 10 spelling words versus 20. So, if they can do it for academics, they can do it for lunch. What a ridiculous rule anyway!! I would not only call on the principal, but the superintendent as well...this school needs some serious help.

As for cleaning his own mess, that is nonsense. That is what janitors are paid for. Maybe you can mention that you'd be happy to take your child's pay in small bills if it's more convenient since he did the work of a janitor![/QUOTE

My thoughts exactly! I also agree that they are taking the needs of the staff over the needs of the child. Talking to the nurse today she started talking to me like I am the crazy one...thanks dis friends for showing me otherwise. I am going to call the school and go in Wed. (the first day my DH can go too due to work), I am going to take my doctors notes with me. I hate to say this, but I think it will help to have DH there. It seems sometimes the people here listen to dad more than mom.

 

[Tiffa]

Sorry keep thinking of things, check and make sure your nurse is a nurse not a medication assistant.

 

[cindermomma]

I did work at a school and we were told we cannot check lunch boxes since that is what the parent is sending to school we had no say (we wanted to say something to the parent that sent a donut and candy lunch everyday) We did have a child with reflux he even had a band put in, we knew what was needed, our nurses were aware, one of his teachers had what I call a "yuck" factor it just seemed to gross her out, for medical reasons I would fight for your son they have no say in your lunches or a Dr's diagnoses check your school's medical policy and use it against them if you have too, better yet check with your DISTRICT policy you will have a way better idea on what to do.

Thanks for the info. Where would I find the policies for my school and/or district? I have the student handbook, but that is only rules for the kids...nothing of what is required of the school. I told the nurse that I would understand if I was sending a coke and a candy bar, but it is 5-8 items (sandwich, goldfish, grapes, go-gurt, bottled water, pudding cup, ect...) that are healthy lunch options. I told him to eat what he can and leave. So, today they called him down and told him to "Follow the rules of the lunchroom" (by the school nurse and secretary). Thanks for any info on those policies you could give me...the more info I have in hand, the better!

 

[Tiffa]

You may have to call your distict office, I worked in a private school not a teacher, basically I was a mom that volunteered so much they finally started to pay me, but my DH really didnt want me to work, policy handbooks are kept in the school office not that they would be helpful in that area, call the district if they choose not to help and ask for the policy in writing. The wording is what your looking for, does it say exactly what they are saying or are they making their own policy.

 

[cindermomma]

You may have to call your distict office, I worked in a private school not a teacher, basically I was a mom that volunteered so much they finally started to pay me, but my DH really didnt want me to work, policy handbooks are kept in the school office not that they would be helpful in that area, call the district if they choose not to help and ask for the policy in writing. The wording is what your looking for, does it say exactly what they are saying or are they making their own policy.

Please forgive me if this sounds dumb...where would I look in the phone book for the district phone number? The county pages in the phone book? Or is it a state of nebraska office? Thanks for the help. I am new to this! I am gonna look online right now for some info.

 

[Tiffa]

Well it would be the under the name of your school then the district which is the overall area, like if they say blah blah city schools are closed today and you say hey that's us. If not try your school website they usually have link to the district for calenders and school service areas. Good luck

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I sent you a pm.

 

[StephMK]

Hi, where are you in NE? I would be really upset about him cleaning up & checking their lunches. I know there is a state site that gives "report card" type marks to all schools, I can't remember if there are links to each county. I know our district has a site & would think most of them probably do.

Good luck, it definitely sounds like you need to have a group meeting so everyone's on the same page about your son's care. And if I another parent there, I'd be fussing about that lunch policy. I don't agree w/a clean plate philosophy at all.

 

[richmond282]

That eating all the food on your plate stuff or you will be punished is the stupidest thing I've ever heard! (and I'm a teacher.) I can understand lunch personnel (or whoever monitors) wanting to make sure the kids eat something, but everything on your plate??? My opinion is I, the parent, paid for the tray of food or packed the lunch. It is none of the school's business what my kid does or doesn't eat...

And cleaning up his own vomit??? That's ridiculous.

There are OSHA policies that must be followed for clean-up of bodily fluids. They are very specific. Every employee in our school system has to watch a video about it every year. Perhaps you could mention that to the school adminstrators.

 

[mom2my2gr8kids]

I am very upset that a child had to clean up after himself, in part because it needs to be cleaned in the proper way, to ensure the safety of other kids as well.

DS, 11, has terrible outdoor allergies, but this fall has been the worst. A simple laugh would put him into a coughing fit. His nose was constantly draining. 2 weeks went by and it wasn't getting better. He wasn't vomiting, but he had no appetite. I took him to our allergist that is about 1 hour away and she saig that it was so bad that we had to put him on steroids (prednisone) for 5 days, and add an inhaler before any exertion, and add nasonex, and singulair as well. Normally he takes a zyrtec everyday. It is finally under better control.

I think that it is due to the fact that I enrolled him in public school this year, no air conditioning. He was in a private school k-5 that had air conditioning. I feel bad, but with the price of private school going up, and since I have been off of work for 16 months due to an injury, we needed to tighten up our belts.

I don't know how to help you with the school. It is terrible that he has to miss recess, socialization, exercise, and so on. Good luck to you.

My kids were on singulair and we took them off, be careful with that stuff!! Lots of side effects that they don't tell you about.

 

[natnelliesmom]

There are definitely OSHA regulations regarding the cleanup of bodily fluids. The area should have been properly cleaned up by a staff member wearing gloves. It then needed to to be sprayed with a special disinfectant used by institutions exactly for the cleanup of vomit. It disinfects for all fluid borne pathogens and gets rid of odors.
I am also a teacher and we have standard written procedures to deal with any and all bodily fluids.
This is a sign of gross negligence on the part of your DS's school.
Not to mention the gross mistreatment of your son! He is a child with special needs and should be treated as such. He should have been escorted to the nurse's office and a parent should have immediately been contacted. It doesn't even sound like he was treated with respect. This is horrible.

As for students having to clean their plates to go to recess.... that is downright disgusting! How many children are overweight these days?? My DDs rarely finish what is on their plates. I encourage them to eat till they are satisfied. Nutritional experts will tell you that forcing a child to clean his plate will only cause weight issues later in life. Haven't these people ever watched the Biggest Loser???
All joking aside... this is a serious issue. I don't think you would be remiss in addressing this with your local school board. Just attend a monthly meeting and ask to address the board with a parent's concern.
Wow. That's all I can say.
Here's a hug from one concerned mom to another. Just take good care of that DS of yours and be his biggest advocate. With a school like that- it's a good thing he has a great mom.
-Sarah

 

[bushdianee]

I am a teacher in Nebraska and there is no way a child would be made to clean up their own vomit. In fact if one of my kiddos gets sick I take the class out in the hall so the custodian can get it cleaned up without an audience. He is always there as quickly as he can. Not to mention that I can't handle the smell and start gagging myself! As far as what he eats for lunch we encourage kids but don't force them to eat. If a child isn't eating much the lunch aides report it to me and I let the parents know so that they are aware.

 

[toy]

I think I would be considering changing schools. There is NO excuse for this. I can't imagine anyone making a 2nd grader clean up vomit. I also don't want anyone punishing my child for not eating all of his food. Not everyone is hungry enough to eat everything. The focus should be on what they eat not how much. If he were my child I would be looking for other options. This school doesn't seem to be looking out for the best interest of the child. I'm not sure what they hope to accomplish with this behavior.

 

[LindaDe]

I think before you approach any school district or superintendent you need to have all the facts. Being a mom and having dealt with teachers, school personnel, PTA's and attending school board meetings I know how they can wear you down if you don't go in totally prepared with facts and possibly even statements from professionals outside the district. Also when your at school functions see if you can lightly get into a conversation about some of these issues (the eating everything on your plate issue) with other moms, chances you will find they have a problem with it too and are too timid to speak up.

First place to start is the internet and find out all you can on the policies of the state and the district. Talk to your doctor and let him in on what happened, he can also direct you to some professionals that can also give you policies that the schools should be following on these issues. I think this school has some problems with the way they handled these situations and I would also add to this a self esteem issue that could follow your son through the rest of his years with the kids in this school.

Good Luck!

 

[KirstenB]

I wonder if this falls under a "disability" category. Meaning that your son has feeding issues, and may need to have the school accomodate him, including not holding him to the same feeding standards as the other kids. I understand where they're coming from in that kids do throw away a lot of their lunches, my own dd included. However, I would argue your son falls under a whole different category.

 

[LadyShea]

He has special medical needs that should be accommodated. Period. The school is acting crazy...I've never heard of such things as cleaning your plate and cleaning up vomit!

Here is a list of all the NE school districts. http://www.greatschools.net/schools/districts/Nebraska/NE I would find yours and get a list of the policies including special medical needs, bodily fluid clean up etc.

Our school district has a website with all policies as downloadable .pdf files, yours may too.

 

[cindermomma]

There are definitely OSHA regulations regarding the cleanup of bodily fluids. The area should have been properly cleaned up by a staff member wearing gloves. It then needed to to be sprayed with a special disinfectant used by institutions exactly for the cleanup of vomit. It disinfects for all fluid borne pathogens and gets rid of odors.
I am also a teacher and we have standard written procedures to deal with any and all bodily fluids.
This is a sign of gross negligence on the part of your DS's school.
Not to mention the gross mistreatment of your son! He is a child with special needs and should be treated as such. He should have been escorted to the nurse's office and a parent should have immediately been contacted. It doesn't even sound like he was treated with respect. This is horrible.

As for students having to clean their plates to go to recess.... that is downright disgusting! How many children are overweight these days?? My DDs rarely finish what is on their plates. I encourage them to eat till they are satisfied. Nutritional experts will tell you that forcing a child to clean his plate will only cause weight issues later in life. Haven't these people ever watched the Biggest Loser???
All joking aside... this is a serious issue. I don't think you would be remiss in addressing this with your local school board. Just attend a monthly meeting and ask to address the board with a parent's concern.
Wow. That's all I can say.
Here's a hug from one concerned mom to another. Just take good care of that DS of yours and be his biggest advocate. With a school like that- it's a good thing he has a great mom.
-Sarah

Your post actually made me cry. Thanks for the encouragement and kind words. I agree with everything you said. I am going to look up the OSHA info, get all my ducks in a row, and then I think we do need to go to the school board. You hit the nail on the head that they didn't treat him with an ounce of respect. Thanks for the hug. I needed it.

 

[cindermomma]

Thank you to all the great parents that have replied to me. The school actually was making me feel like I was the crazy one...it's nice to get your perspective and encouragement to continue this fight. I have talked to other parents, but since we live in a small school area, they don't want to "cause waves". I will dive right into the biggest one for my son though, and that's what I will do. I am going to work on the computer today, arming myself with any and all info I can find.

DS came home from school yesterday and said the school nurse and the secretary pulled him from class 2x to explain the "lunch room rules" and said they expect him to follow them. They also told him of a 3rd grade girl who needs to eat first so that she doesn't get sick (why did they say that...no clue, but it upset me that they were discussing another child's issues with my DS, what-and to who-are they saying about my kiddo?)

You guys are the greatest. I will post what I come up with and my plan of action. Thanks again, friends.

 

[LadyShea]

They also told him of a 3rd grade girl who needs to eat first so that she doesn't get sick (why did they say that...no clue, but it upset me that they were discussing another child's issues with my DS, what-and to who-are they saying about my kiddo?)

Okay now this is just nuts, and possibly illegal. That's private information.

Just remember, school employees are State employees (and your taxes pay for the schools). Do not let them bully you or make you feel in the wrong, and go to the top if needed to your State board of education.

 

[cindermomma]

Hi, where are you in NE? I would be really upset about him cleaning up & checking their lunches. I know there is a state site that gives "report card" type marks to all schools, I can't remember if there are links to each county. I know our district has a site & would think most of them probably do.

Good luck, it definitely sounds like you need to have a group meeting so everyone's on the same page about your son's care. And if I another parent there, I'd be fussing about that lunch policy. I don't agree w/a clean plate philosophy at all.

I live about 35 min. North of Omaha in Hooper.