Having a very hard time with DS going off to college

[LisaR]

And just like that, she's gone.

Classes and work start up on Monday so DD went back tonight to get settled. It seems like she just got home. We had a GREAT time while she was here, but that made it even harder when she left.

DD really loves college and had a terrific first semester. She had perfect grades, made plenty of friends, really got herself involved in the college, and made the best out of some really difficult situations. She belongs there. As much as she loves home, she really belongs at college now. The way she is growing through this experience is amazing. For her, it was the right decision. So as sad as I am right now, and as quiet as the house is without her, I have to go back to adjusting to this new way of life.

I know some of your kids still have a week or two at home. Hope you are all having a wonderful time! Happy New Year!!

 

[HERSEY]

Lisa

My son went back yesterday. They opened the residence halls early since we are getting a whole lotta snow. He was supposed to go back today, so that meant a hole lotta scrambling. I kind of felt my heart again took a hit. I know I'll be fine and he loves college. I really fell back into the pattern of cooking for him and the animals loved having him around too.

I am hating the winter and the snow this year

 

[mom2rtk]

And just like that, she's gone.

Classes and work start up on Monday so DD went back tonight to get settled. It seems like she just got home. We had a GREAT time while she was here, but that made it even harder when she left.

DD really loves college and had a terrific first semester. She had perfect grades, made plenty of friends, really got herself involved in the college, and made the best out of some really difficult situations. She belongs there. As much as she loves home, she really belongs at college now. The way she is growing through this experience is amazing. For her, it was the right decision. So as sad as I am right now, and as quiet as the house is without her, I have to go back to adjusting to this new way of life.

I know some of your kids still have a week or two at home. Hope you are all having a wonderful time! Happy New Year!!

Lisa

My son went back yesterday. They opened the residence halls early since we are getting a whole lotta snow. He was supposed to go back today, so that meant a hole lotta scrambling. I kind of felt my heart again took a hit. I know I'll be fine and he loves college. I really fell back into the pattern of cooking for him and the animals loved having him around too.

I am hating the winter and the snow this year

Hugs guys! I was so jealous when everyone's kids got fall breaks, but now feel so fortunate that mine has such a long winter break. I thought most kids got a little longer than this at Christmas. Our commuter student starts back a week from tomorrow. The one leaving doesn't start for 2 more weeks.

We got hit by a big winter blast last night too so that does drive home how much we'll need to watch that forecast as it gets closer. The drive down there ends with an hour on 2 lane curving highway, not something I would want to do myself, nor is it something I want him doing with his friend from school if the weather is iffy.

It really did surprise me how quickly I got used to him being back home. So it sort of worries me that it will come as a shock when he leaves again. It really was a great first semester here too. I think he got a 4.0, but he never did get online and check that last grade. Not that it matters..... he got through the rough patches and did well. Fingers crossed next semester will go as well, even though he'll be starting off with a new roommate.

Big hugs to everyone dealing with empty nests again.

 

[RejoyceoverDisney]

Odd this thread hasn't been showing new posts but apparently you all have been chatting. hmmm

Hi all. My guy is still here until the 14th. He has been a huge help with his brother in that I can come and go a lot easier. He and I also went up to church on Monday and worked together to haul some Christmas trees back to storage (they were heavy!!!) and then get rid of the pine wreaths. Ouch those were picky. We laughed and worked hard together. I'm proud of him. He even went out in the cold rain and didn't complain about getting soaked. Weird fond memory but it is fond.

He did well this Fall semester. He got a 4.0 so now he has equal to 4 semesters in credits behind him. (he was able to transfer in 5 AP classes)
He really has grown up a lot and I'm so impressed.
Yet so happy to see his child-like nature come out. Especially when our friends came over with their 12 and 8 year old boys and my son was right there playing with them and there was no sense of "I'm 20 and too old for you". Super proud.

Well the next few days will be prep time to get ready to bring him back. The house is going to be super quiet when he is gone. Even "big brother" is going to struggle this time. He even expressed it this past weekend which is a huge thing for him to be able to express.

Just wanted to check in and say hello and send hugs to all of you that already had to send your babies back. I hope all is well. We have had the extreme cold we haven't seen in a long time. I hope it does last much longer. They say 50 this weekend but I don't want that cold stuff to come back.
I know it's only January and I live in Massachusetts.

 

[Beachbumpirates]

And just like that, she's gone.

DD really loves college and had a terrific first semester. She had perfect grades, made plenty of friends, really got herself involved in the college, and made the best out of some really difficult situations. She belongs there. As much as she loves home, she really belongs at college now. The way she is growing through this experience is amazing. For her, it was the right decision. So as sad as I am right now, and as quiet as the house is without her, I have to go back to adjusting to this new way of life.

I know some of your kids still have a week or two at home. Hope you are all having a wonderful time! Happy New Year!!

I could have written this same thing! So proud/happy that they are doing well, adjusting and happy. Makes it that much easier - doesn't it? But yes the house is once again quiet and the 3 of us need to readjust to her being gone. Hard to believe we are half way through the first year. I have not posted in some time but am so happy to see that everyone's kids are doing so well and we as parents are too! I really think that the first 4-6 weeks are the worst. We ended up driving DD back after Christmas break due to the horrible snow last week and were so surprised at how familiar she was driving and getting around in her new surroundings. I was proud and know she is where she belongs. Rush begins soon and she is so excited!

Was very sad to see a DIS mom pass over the holidays (ugadog99). She posted a lot, especially last year. We all seemed to be looking as schools in similar areas for similar majors. I have thought of her and her girls much over the past few weeks.

And I had a small hiccup w/a class size issue for my HS DD this past week that now is resolved. Although it taught me not to post many things on the DIS until my skin thickens up. I am still in a bit of a 'fragile' state and wasn't prepared for the jabs.

Jealous of those who still have their kiddos home. Thinking of you all and hoping your holidays were happy. We made it through and are half way!

 

[Katy Belle]

My Big Guy is back at college too! His classes start today, he left Friday. His plan was to go back Saturday, but so many of his friends returned earlier in the week, he was ready to go back. That makes me very happy...and very sad!

He was home 30 days, but it really didn't feel like it. We were all so happy to have him here and all miss him now!

Glad everyone had time to make memories with their big kids over the holidays!

 

[cabanafrau]

Gotta admit I'm still a little bitter that the extreme weather meant my DD went back a day early. It was comforting to know that she was really missing everyone at school & was excited to get back and get together with everyone. She did say they all got a bit of cabin fever when no one really left their dorm Sunday, Monday and until about 5 on Tuesday. She said you could really tell everybody was just ready for classes to resume already.

This year I did temper my expectations of the break, knowing when they head back it's rough. I'm still adjusting, I think because last week's schedule was all mixed up due to the weather and I was busy, just not back in the groove and able to distract myself easily.

 

[Mom21]

Well, exactly what I feared is happening. It is time to hit the accept and pay button for my dd. I was in the middle of something Sat evening when she came in with her laptop for me to pay. I told her give me about 30 minutes and I would. Well she tossed the laptop on the bed saying, "Well fine. I just won't go." I talked to her later. I think she is struggling with not wanting to go. She said, "who wants to graduate and grow up and go to 3 years of high school (she skipped 9th), 4 years of college, get a job, and pay bills? Nobody."

Sigh. I knew we would have issues once I drop her off. I fully plan to get text and calls every single day at least for first semester. I asked her if she wanted to go local. She just screamed at me "I'm going to FSU. Only stupid people go local." I just walked away because engaging when she is like this doesn't work. I've learned that from years of experience. She comes home from her dad's tomorrow. How do I approach this so we don't miss the deadline to pay?

 

[mom2rtk]

I have the rest of this week with mine but in an odd way I wish he started already. Probably because I only have the bad part left and I wish that part was over.

My Big Guy is back at college too! His classes start today, he left Friday. His plan was to go back Saturday, but so many of his friends returned earlier in the week, he was ready to go back. That makes me very happy...and very sad!

He was home 30 days, but it really didn't feel like it. We were all so happy to have him here and all miss him now!

Glad everyone had time to make memories with their big kids over the holidays!

I totally get the "happy and sad" thing. Hang in there.

Gotta admit I'm still a little bitter that the extreme weather meant my DD went back a day early. It was comforting to know that she was really missing everyone at school & was excited to get back and get together with everyone. She did say they all got a bit of cabin fever when no one really left their dorm Sunday, Monday and until about 5 on Tuesday. She said you could really tell everybody was just ready for classes to resume already.

This year I did temper my expectations of the break, knowing when they head back it's rough. I'm still adjusting, I think because last week's schedule was all mixed up due to the weather and I was busy, just not back in the groove and able to distract myself easily.

I'd be bitter too. You got robbed. I'm bracing myself now already and not looking forward to the next week.

Well, exactly what I feared is happening. It is time to hit the accept and pay button for my dd. I was in the middle of something Sat evening when she came in with her laptop for me to pay. I told her give me about 30 minutes and I would. Well she tossed the laptop on the bed saying, "Well fine. I just won't go." I talked to her later. I think she is struggling with not wanting to go. She said, "who wants to graduate and grow up and go to 3 years of high school (she skipped 9th), 4 years of college, get a job, and pay bills? Nobody."

Sigh. I knew we would have issues once I drop her off. I fully plan to get text and calls every single day at least for first semester. I asked her if she wanted to go local. She just screamed at me "I'm going to FSU. Only stupid people go local." I just walked away because engaging when she is like this doesn't work. I've learned that from years of experience. She comes home from her dad's tomorrow. How do I approach this so we don't miss the deadline to pay?

Can you just pay the deposit now and take a chance? We didn't have to pay more than a deposit in the spring for my son. Sometimes you just have to take a chance and hope for the best.

That sort of second thinking is sure hard to handle though.

 

[Katy Belle]

Well, exactly what I feared is happening. It is time to hit the accept and pay button for my dd. I was in the middle of something Sat evening when she came in with her laptop for me to pay. I told her give me about 30 minutes and I would. Well she tossed the laptop on the bed saying, "Well fine. I just won't go." I talked to her later. I think she is struggling with not wanting to go. She said, "who wants to graduate and grow up and go to 3 years of high school (she skipped 9th), 4 years of college, get a job, and pay bills? Nobody."

Sigh. I knew we would have issues once I drop her off. I fully plan to get text and calls every single day at least for first semester. I asked her if she wanted to go local. She just screamed at me "I'm going to FSU. Only stupid people go local." I just walked away because engaging when she is like this doesn't work. I've learned that from years of experience. She comes home from her dad's tomorrow. How do I approach this so we don't miss the deadline to pay?

No advice, just hugs!

 

[PRINCESS VIJA]

And just like that, she's gone.

DD really loves college and had a terrific first semester. She had perfect grades, made plenty of friends, really got herself involved in the college, and made the best out of some really difficult situations. She belongs there. As much as she loves home, she really belongs at college now. The way she is growing through this experience is amazing. For her, it was the right decision. So as sad as I am right now, and as quiet as the house is without her, I have to go back to adjusting to this new way of life.

I too could have written this paragraph... except it is DS instead of DD! It is so hard to have to readjust each time.

Lisa
. I kind of felt my heart again took a hit. I know I'll be fine and he loves college. I really fell back into the pattern of cooking for him and the animals loved having him around too.

I am hating the winter and the snow this year

Second the snow and the cold hating! I am not a winter person anymore! When we dropped him off, my heart was hurting again too.

I could have written this same thing! So proud/happy that they are doing well, adjusting and happy. Makes it that much easier - doesn't it? But yes the house is once again quiet and the 3 of us need to readjust to her being gone. Hard to believe we are half way through the first year. I have not posted in some time but am so happy to see that everyone's kids are doing so well and we as parents are too! I really think that the first 4-6 weeks are the worst. We ended up driving DD back after Christmas break due to the horrible snow last week and were so surprised at how familiar she was driving and getting around in her new surroundings. I was proud and know she is where she belongs. Rush begins soon and she is so excited!

Was very sad to see a DIS mom pass over the holidays (ugadog99). She posted a lot, especially last year. We all seemed to be looking as schools in similar areas for similar majors. I have thought of her and her girls much over the past few weeks.

I didn't know we lost a DISmom. So very sad.

Well, exactly what I feared is happening. It is time to hit the accept and pay button for my dd. I was in the middle of something Sat evening when she came in with her laptop for me to pay. I told her give me about 30 minutes and I would. Well she tossed the laptop on the bed saying, "Well fine. I just won't go." I talked to her later. I think she is struggling with not wanting to go. She said, "who wants to graduate and grow up and go to 3 years of high school (she skipped 9th), 4 years of college, get a job, and pay bills? Nobody."

Sigh. I knew we would have issues once I drop her off. I fully plan to get text and calls every single day at least for first semester. I asked her if she wanted to go local. She just screamed at me "I'm going to FSU. Only stupid people go local." I just walked away because engaging when she is like this doesn't work. I've learned that from years of experience. She comes home from her dad's tomorrow. How do I approach this so we don't miss the deadline to pay?

Hugs to you both. Do you think she will approach you? I imagine that with a deadline coming,, she is stressing, conflicted, but probably doesn't want to miss the deadline? more hugs...

 

[PRINCESS VIJA]

Well... DS is back at school too, for over a week, and he is doing well. I am happy that he is happy, has friends, is very involved in the fraternity and loves his interim teacher. (they can take an accelerated class between semesters, doesn't cost extra and helps lighten the load).

But... I do believe that he has transferred his "home" feeling to away from here. Other things he has said and done really show that he is becoming independent super fast, and really breaking ties.

The night before he went back we went out for dinner and I mentioned I want him to send some emails/texts every so often. he asked if he doesn't do a good job of keeping in touch and in unison DD And DH said "no". He has made more of an effort to contact us. So that did make me very happy.

My new "normal" better include a better handle and grasp on the fact that he is flying the coop with strong wings. I am happy he is doing well... I just wasn't prepared for him to fly so fast.

 

[mom2rtk]

My new "normal" better include a better handle and grasp on the fact that he is flying the coop with strong wings. I am happy he is doing well... I just wasn't prepared for him to fly so fast.

It sure beats the alternative though, doesn't it?

I'm so glad he's doing well.

 

[kacaju]

My new "normal" better include a better handle and grasp on the fact that he is flying the coop with strong wings. I am happy he is doing well... I just wasn't prepared for him to fly so fast.

You have done your job as a Mother!! Not saying the job is ever *done* but you have done good so far!! Be proud!

 

[marcyinPA]

Welcome to the second semester folks!! My DS goes back on Sunday. Classes start Tuesday. He is ready. New major, new roommate, no girlfriend, new outlook!

We had a really good time with him home. A couple of minor hiccups (mostly him acting like he was still living in a dorm. Nobody else had that problem?!) We spent Christmas week in So California which was WONDERFUL. DS 14 marched in the Rose Parade with our HS band, and my DS18 was beaming with pride as a band alum. DS 14 stayed with the band, so we did not see him at all. It was kind of neat just spending the week with the older one. Different and kind of special. We spent two days in Disneyland and California Adventure which was fun. When we got home, he hung out a lot with his guy friends from HS (movies, game night, etc) and he had a blast. He missed out on a lot of that during senior year because of having a serious girlfriend. I'm glad the guys still want to hang with each other!!

He is going to be looking for a job on campus, and is considering applying to be a CA (RA). I really didn't think he would be interested in something like that, but he has been talking to the dean of student affairs (she is a friend of a good friend of ours) and she thinks he would be a good fit. Either way, he has some irons in the fire so we will see what happens.

Looking forward to returning to our little fellowship group here !! Best of luck to your kiddos!!

 

[mom2rtk]

I finally said goodbye this week like the rest of you. My husband drove him back on Monday. Not a great day, but thankfully so much easier than first semester. He seems to be settling in pretty quickly, and things seem to be going OK with the new roommate.

How's everyone else doing?

 

[marcyinPA]

I finally said goodbye this week like the rest of you. My husband drove him back on Monday. Not a great day, but thankfully so much easier than first semester. He seems to be settling in pretty quickly, and things seem to be going OK with the new roommate.

How's everyone else doing?

Hugs!!! This leaving and coming back for six weeks and leaving again thing is really hard on a mothers heart!! So glad that he is settling back in. Did he know the roommate or is a random person?

My DS started classes on Tuesday. Sort of. His classes were actually canceled due to the snow, and Wednesday classes were canceled before 11 am so he only had one class Wednesday. It has been brutally cold here- and he did not pack his boots. Duh. And yes, he wishes he had them! Funny how in HS, he wouldn't be caught dead wearing a coat. In college, he wears a coat, hat, gloves, scarf!! Haha!

He had all his classes by today. He called this afternoon to check in He says they will be a lot of work but he sounds happy with them. First assignment due is for journalism : write your own obituary. Creepy!

He was also asked by one of his professors to be a commentator at the men's and women's basketball games tomorrow! He will be the color commentator and will be on TV . He is super excited about this!! Living the dream!!

Hope everyone else's kids have had a good week and a good adjustment!!

 

[LisaR]

I finally said goodbye this week like the rest of you. My husband drove him back on Monday. Not a great day, but thankfully so much easier than first semester. He seems to be settling in pretty quickly, and things seem to be going OK with the new roommate.

How's everyone else doing?

Wow! You had a nice long break!! In a way that probably made it harder since you guys probably had time to get back into a routine. Two weeks with DD didn't seem like enough, but it was probably for the best. She just finished up her third week of classes.

Glad things are going well with the new roommate!! DD still has her one whacky roommate. 13 weeks and she won't ever see her again (especially since she flunked all of her classes but one so I'm guessing she'll be gone from campus for good).

Hope he has a great semester!!

Hugs!!! This leaving and coming back for six weeks and leaving again thing is really hard on a mothers heart!! So glad that he is settling back in. Did he know the roommate or is a random person?

My DS started classes on Tuesday. Sort of. His classes were actually canceled due to the snow, and Wednesday classes were canceled before 11 am so he only had one class Wednesday. It has been brutally cold here- and he did not pack his boots. Duh. And yes, he wishes he had them! Funny how in HS, he wouldn't be caught dead wearing a coat. In college, he wears a coat, hat, gloves, scarf!! Haha!

He had all his classes by today. He called this afternoon to check in He says they will be a lot of work but he sounds happy with them. First assignment due is for journalism : write your own obituary. Creepy!

He was also asked by one of his professors to be a commentator at the men's and women's basketball games tomorrow! He will be the color commentator and will be on TV . He is super excited about this!! Living the dream!!

Hope everyone else's kids have had a good week and a good adjustment!!

My son wants to be a voice actor so he is always looking for ways to use his voice. He has an internship at a radio station and got to record a commercial. He was beyond thrilled! He would love to commentate some day. How cool for your son! Sounds like he is all set for a great semester.

 

[HERSEY]

marcyinPA Congrats to your son. And WOW he wears a coat,scarf,hat and gloves. I am lucky if my son zips his coat. I do think he is wising up regarding this weird cold weather this year. He is using his knit hat, gloves and hand warmers I sent.

Next week we are going back into subarctic temps. I am so looking forward to spring I can't tell you.

Are all your kids picking roommates and housing for next year? My son picks his next week already. I guess it is almost FAFSA time again.

We are on the downside to having the Freshman year done

 

[mom2rtk]

Hugs!!! This leaving and coming back for six weeks and leaving again thing is really hard on a mothers heart!! So glad that he is settling back in. Did he know the roommate or is a random person?

My DS started classes on Tuesday. Sort of. His classes were actually canceled due to the snow, and Wednesday classes were canceled before 11 am so he only had one class Wednesday. It has been brutally cold here- and he did not pack his boots. Duh. And yes, he wishes he had them! Funny how in HS, he wouldn't be caught dead wearing a coat. In college, he wears a coat, hat, gloves, scarf!! Haha!

He had all his classes by today. He called this afternoon to check in He says they will be a lot of work but he sounds happy with them. First assignment due is for journalism : write your own obituary. Creepy!

He was also asked by one of his professors to be a commentator at the men's and women's basketball games tomorrow! He will be the color commentator and will be on TV . He is super excited about this!! Living the dream!!

Hope everyone else's kids have had a good week and a good adjustment!!

Thanks. I loved that nice long break having him home. But in some ways I do think it made it harder when he had to go back. At least he has a week for spring break in 2 months, so still much better than first semester. It really does feel like the down side now.

And YEAH! for your son. That is awesome! I hope he enjoys the experience.

But.... write your own obituary? Eek.

Wow! You had a nice long break!! In a way that probably made it harder since you guys probably had time to get back into a routine. Two weeks with DD didn't seem like enough, but it was probably for the best. She just finished up her third week of classes.

Glad things are going well with the new roommate!! DD still has her one whacky roommate. 13 weeks and she won't ever see her again (especially since she flunked all of her classes but one so I'm guessing she'll be gone from campus for good).

Hope he has a great semester!!


My son wants to be a voice actor so he is always looking for ways to use his voice. He has an internship at a radio station and got to record a commercial. He was beyond thrilled! He would love to commentate some day. How cool for your son! Sounds like he is all set for a great semester.

Wow, she's deep into her studies already. My DS doesn't even have all of his books yet! 2 weeks really wouldn't have been enough for me. I loved that it really felt like DS was "home" and not just visiting. But that also made it harder when it was time to leave.

And thanks for the wishes for a good semester. It's only been a few days with the new roomie, but they did know each other from first semester. He was on the same floor but just didn't click with first roommate. But I think he knew him well enough that they'll do fine. And maybe this roommate will play an occasional video game with my DS. I never thought I'd wish for that, but here I am. My DS really did like his first roomie. He was a really nice kid. But he didn't play video games, didn't watch TV and ate no junk food.

So shocking that your DD's roomie flunked all her classes! Didn't see that one coming, did you? Soon enough she will thankfully be nothing but a great story from your daughter's past.

And what a great opportunity for your son too!