Friends taking advantage

[stacy6552]

Ok neighbors I need to vent. In January we made plans to bring some friends with us to BCV this summer, in a 2 bedroom. About a month or so ago, they made some noises about maybe not going. I said no sweat just let me know. Over the last few weeks, I began asking if they were coming and a week ago, I said I needed an answer. I kept getting the can we talk tonight and I'll let you know tomorrow. So today is 31 days before our trip and I called this afternoon and said today at 5:30 was my deadline to make changes. My friend asked to call me back in ten minutes. At 6 pm I went to the gym and she called a few minutes after I left. When I called her back, she said she was sorry, that DH had been on the phone and then (brace yourself) she got distracted by the news about MJ. What?!? Not this is the truly kindest woman you could ever meet and I feel really really guilty for being pissed but....

I just can't help it! That's just so wrong. We using anywhere between 50 and 145 more points than we need on this trip and she can't be bothered to pause the freaking news and call me! Anybody got a punching bag? I think I need to go back to the gym.

 

[Kickapoo Joie Juice]

Ok neighbors I need to vent. In January we made plans to bring some friends with us to BCV this summer, in a 2 bedroom. About a month or so ago, they made some noises about maybe not going. I said no sweat just let me know. Over the last few weeks, I began asking if they were coming and a week ago, I said I needed an answer. I kept getting the can we talk tonight and I'll let you know tomorrow. So today is 31 days before our trip and I called this afternoon and said today at 5:30 was my deadline to make changes. My friend asked to call me back in ten minutes. At 6 pm I went to the gym and she called a few minutes after I left. When I called her back, she said she was sorry, that DH had been on the phone and then (brace yourself) she got distracted by the news about MJ. What?!? Not this is the truly kindest woman you could ever meet and I feel really really guilty for being pissed but....

I just can't help it! That's just so wrong. We using anywhere between 50 and 145 more points than we need on this trip and she can't be bothered to pause the freaking news and call me! Anybody got a punching bag? I think I need to go back to the gym.

Alas, it is a rite of passage every DVC'er seems to pass through.

With me it was my parents, and we got stuck with a dedicated two bedroom for four people (they insisted on the two bedroom for more "togetherness" ) and then bailed on us.

Now, I let people waffle as much as they want, but if I don't have the money in hand at a specific, agreed upon date,(and in time to let the ressie go and bank, if need be), then I don't hesitate to cut friends/family loose.

It's the only way people actually will commit!

 

[castleri]

Ok neighbors I need to vent. In January we made plans to bring some friends with us to BCV this summer, in a 2 bedroom. About a month or so ago, they made some noises about maybe not going. I said no sweat just let me know. Over the last few weeks, I began asking if they were coming and a week ago, I said I needed an answer. I kept getting the can we talk tonight and I'll let you know tomorrow. So today is 31 days before our trip and I called this afternoon and said today at 5:30 was my deadline to make changes. My friend asked to call me back in ten minutes. At 6 pm I went to the gym and she called a few minutes after I left. When I called her back, she said she was sorry, that DH had been on the phone and then (brace yourself) she got distracted by the news about MJ. What?!? Not this is the truly kindest woman you could ever meet and I feel really really guilty for being pissed but....

I just can't help it! That's just so wrong. We using anywhere between 50 and 145 more points than we need on this trip and she can't be bothered to pause the freaking news and call me! Anybody got a punching bag? I think I need to go back to the gym.

Could you try to change to a smaller unit for your family and then use the holding points for a second trip or extend the current trip for a few extra days? If you couldn't do that you might be able to rent the points in holding and have some extra cash for some special activities. Last but not least maybe you have some other friends or family that can join you on this trip. I just had to cancel a BCV 12/27/09 - 1/1/2010 2 BR trip because a family member decided she would prefer Sept - At least we didn't end up in holding but I had borrowed 2010 points for the original reservation so now instead of just using the banked 2008 points and 2009 points I will have to bank the leftover 2009 points into 2010 and will have to be sure to use them or lose them completely. Then after I changed the reservation to Sept she decided she wanted one day less so now I have even more points to bank. I do feel fortunate that we don't have points in holding which I did the last time we had a family trip planned for Christmas week and my son lost his job a day or so past the 31 day mark and didn't feel he could do a Disney trip when he really needed to find and start a new job. We ultimately used the holding points but it is a worry. I feel your frustration and anger - just don't let it spoil your trip.

 

[rentayenta]

That stinks!!!

 

[jekjones1558]

I think that many folks just don't "get" how this points thing works. I know my family didn't understand until one of them talked with a kiosk person during one of our family vacations. OP, it doesn't fix the problem, but I hope that your DGF is just ignorant about DVC and not selfish. Hopefully MS can help you in the morning. Good luck!

 

[DebbieB]

Did they have a separate room or do you want to downgrade the room you have? I would call them first thing tomorrow. If there is still availability, they could possibly substitute the holding points and free up regular points

 

[Lynne M]

That's really unfortunate, I'm sorry that happened to you.

I'll bet that your friends really don't understand the way timeshares work. So many people think that it's like a vacation home that you own, or that you're staying 'free', so there's no loss to you if they don't show up.

Not that is is any help to you, but maybe it will save others from your fate:

If there's one piece I'd give to people planning a trip where they're at risk to lose points if their guests back out, it would be to sit those guests down right at the beginning of the planning and explain that a) you'll lose points if they don't show up, and b) those points have a real monetary value. Make sure they understand that if they back out after the deadline, you will LOSE MONEY. Because of them. That your loss of points means your family will miss out on a vacation you could have taken.

I'd also set a cancellation deadline for your guests that's about a week before the real deadline, and I'd tell them that if they don't give you a firm commitment by that point, sorry, but you'll have to cancel their reservation, or downsize your villa.

 

[Deb & Bill]

I guess that's the last time they'll be invited.

 

[JimMIA]

Sorry you had such a bad outcome, but points going into holding is only one of the issues we have to consider when setting a drop-dead date...and often not the most important. Even if she'd let you know two weeks ago, you would probably have had difficulty switching to a smaller unit because of limited availability.

In most of these cases, I don't think it is really the lack of knowledge about DVC that causes problems. More often, I think people are enticed by the prospect of a free (or inexpensive) place to stay, but when they start adding up airfare, park tickets, and food the enthusiasm starts to wane.

They realize that they are going to be spending thousands of dollars on a vacation they really had not had any huge desire to take until the DVC offer was made. Even with "free" lodging, WDW is a very expensive vacation and I suspect that fact is the culprit most of the time.

 

[Nikisha421]

This is the exact reason I dont let ppl in on certain things unless it a must...I always have a studio I never upgrade to please anyone...if you want to come along and crash on the couch by all means...however, if you want your own space then I need your OWN money...so with that said...I have always been in a studio and all of the ppl that were coming with me that have back out at the last minute have not cost me a thing or frustration...I do understand your pain though@@$

 

[jekjones1558]

Sorry you had such a bad outcome, but points going into holding is only one of the issues we have to consider when setting a drop-dead date...and often not the most important. Even if she'd let you know two weeks ago, you would probably have had difficulty switching to a smaller unit because of limited availability.

In most of these cases, I don't think it is really the lack of knowledge about DVC that causes problems. More often, I think people are enticed by the prospect of a free (or inexpensive) place to stay, but when they start adding up airfare, park tickets, and food the enthusiasm starts to wane.

They realize that they are going to be spending thousands of dollars on a vacation they really had not had any huge desire to take until the DVC offer was made. Even with "free" lodging, WDW is a very expensive vacation and I suspect that fact is the culprit most of the time.

I never thought about it in this way. Excellent points.

 

[Starr W.]

This is the exact reason I dont let ppl in on certain things unless it a must...I always have a studio I never upgrade to please anyone...if you want to come along and crash on the couch by all means...however, if you want your own space then I need your OWN money...so with that said...I have always been in a studio and all of the ppl that were coming with me that have back out at the last minute have not cost me a thing or frustration...I do understand your pain though@@$

, good plan.

 

[Crystal_27]

We were in the same situation for our upcoming September trip (although our friends' plans changed because the husband was laid off, not because they were being wishy-washy about going). We were booked for a 2 bedroom at BLT and, because he was laid off, they had to cancel, leaving us holding the bag for a 2 bedroom. Thankfully, we were outside of the cancellation period and were able to get a studio instead, but we got lucky due to the fact that we're traveling in "slow" season. It probably sounds selfish, but DH and I decided that we won't be "comping" our friends' accommodations from now on.

 

[Disney_Villain]

I tried to treat 2 friends last year and they each backed out on me. Both initially said "absolutely" to going, but when pressed for a deadline to confirm I got ambiguous responses. I had to really push to get the word "no" out of them.

For each of them it was a money issue (different reasons behind each of them them) - but they couldn't bring themselves to say it for fear of shame.

After all that headache, I've vowed to never again gift our points to friends. They have no idea what value our timeshare really has and what we paid for it (in purchase price and annual dues), nor do they have any real idea what the consequences are for last-moment cancellations. It doesn't affect them, so who cares?

 

[goofy4tink]

We all seem to go through it, don't we??!! I have a friend that is always saying that nobody wants to go to WDW with her. So, I told her that if she wanted to go in early Dec, I would be thrilled to go with her...just let me know and I would book it. Well, both she and our pastor's wife said they wanted to go....so I booked a one bedroo villa for that time period. Well, the pastor's wife had to cancel because they were going to be in the Pocono's for Thanksgiving and not returning until Monday..the day we were to leave for WDW. So that left just two of us. No problem. I did keep asking my friend if she was sure or if she was having second thoughts...that whole 'money' issue...airfare, park tickets, food. She hemmed and hawed for months. I did have to pin her down and tell her that she had to give me a firm answer last week.....I don't mind being in WDW alone, but a lot of friends were going to be arriving the day I was set to leave...I wanted to try and rebook my dates so I could hang with them if she wasn't going to go. And each day, the availability for villas got worse and worse. She finally committed to going....booked her airfare and all.
But, man..I was sweating it for a bit there. They say no good deed goes unpunished. We all know how that applies to traveling to our DVC villas with friends!!!!

 

[kim532]

I am going to try to learn from your expereinces and not ever offer my points out. I will feed my addiction and keep them all to myself.

Kim

 

[CarolMN]

What is it about DVC?

Most of us would never offer to pay cash for an extra room to treat family and friends to a vacation.

Yet we buy DVC, go crazy inviting others to vacation with us and then become upset if they back out.

I agree with JimMIA. Most people do not consider all the extra money a WDW vacation costs until it's time to pay up. They also think there is no extra charge to the owner if they're going to be in a timeshare. They reason the cost is the same whether extra people are there or not.

When we treat, I give the invitees an estimate up front of all the costs they'll have to bear. I also try to get them to purchase something "non-refundable" before my banking or cancellation deadline (usually that's airfare). We haven't had anyone back out on us yet.

My brother came close, though. We invited them to come along in December, 2001. He called me to back out in October because they were getting too afraid to fly. I told him to quit watching cable TV news, reminded him that he stood to lose over $1000 in non-refundable airfare and asked that he call me in a week or two. They went. We laugh about it now - turned out to be the best WDW trip we ever took!

 

[La2kw]

If my friends or family want to come along, they can buy their own room. I don't have enough points to reserve them a room. Besides, I can't imagine any of my friends or family expecting me to provide their lodging for them.

 

[BostonDisneyKid]

CarolMN: My brother came close, though. We invited them to come along in December, 2001. He called me to back out in October because they were getting too afraid to fly. I told him to quit watching cable TV news, reminded him that he stood to lose over $1000 in non-refundable airfare and asked that he call me in a week or two. They went. We laugh about it now - turned out to be the best WDW trip we ever took!

I was there in Dec 2001 and it was probably our most memorable trips ever as well. There were no lines anywhere, for anything. We walked into any restaurant without reservations. We have pictures of us on MK main st with no one and I do mean no one in the pictures but us. The weather was incredible that year also. The holiday decorations were incredible as always. It was the first time we saw it snow in MGM (now DS). They premiered the snowflake glasses that year at MGM also. The lighting of the tree at Epcot might have been witnessed by 500 or so people. Memories!!! Memories !!! That was a great December at the world !!!

 

[theww228]

“Never use points for other people that you don’t expect to lose”.

It is similar to the saying about books, “Never lend a friend a book you expect to get back”.

You almost need to go in with the expectation that your guests will back out. It is better to be pleasantly surprised, than bitterly disappointed!