Do you complain about a rude waitress?

[Alexsandra]

I have had this happen to me. I have a severe allergy to anise (the spice), to cold cuts and I am intolerant to dairy. I have had to deal with a rude waiter once who refused to go get the Chef and said he would take care of telling the kitchen himself. I did have an ADR noting my allergy so I do not understand why they did not follow protocol or why he was so rude when I told him that I preferred talking directly to the chef!?. In the end, after a long discussion and debate, he went to get the chef. It was a stressful and uncomfortable situation and it ruined my evening. I did not complain to a manager because in the end I did get to speak to the Chef but in hindsight I should have alerted the manager of the waiter's lack of knowledge when it came to allergies.

I even had a bad experience at California Grill a couple of years ago when the Chef made me feel like my allergy was a real bother and he refused to modify any of his dishes because he said they were all cooked with butter!? He pointed to one option on the menu (sushi) and told me that was all I could eat. So I kindly asked if he could modify the steak dish to be dairy free since I figured a steak could be cooked without butter and he said no. As for dessert he said there was nothing on the menu for me. I just don't understand why he was so rude with me. It was like he thought I was being a picky eater and he was treating me like a child who was being fussy. Honestly, I was too shy to complain at the time and figured it would just make me feel worse to make a scene but I regret that decision now. I should have complained to upper manager. One should never have to deal with feeling guilty about having a food allergy. It is hard enough for allergic person to feel safe eating out.

That being said, other than these two situations, I have had nothing but great experiences at Disney Restaurants. Usually all the staff at Disney go above and beyond to make me feel welcome and safe.

 

[wilkeliza]

I have had this happen to me. I have a severe allergy to anise (the spice), to cold cuts and I am intolerant to dairy. I have had to deal with a rude waiter once who refused to go get the Chef and said he would take care of telling the kitchen himself. I did have an ADR noting my allergy so I do not understand why they did not follow protocol or why he was so rude when I told him that I preferred talking directly to the chef!?. In the end, after a long discussion and debate, he went to get the chef. It was a stressful and uncomfortable situation and it ruined my evening. I did not complain to a manager because in the end I did get to speak to the Chef but in hindsight I should have alerted the manager of the waiter's lack of knowledge when it came to allergies.

I even had a bad experience at California Grill a couple of years ago when the Chef made me feel like my allergy was a real bother and he refused to modify any of his dishes because he said they were all cooked with butter!? He pointed to one option on the menu (sushi) and told me that was all I could eat. So I kindly asked if he could modify the steak dish to be dairy free since I figured a steak could be cooked without butter and he said no. As for dessert he said there was nothing on the menu for me. I just don't understand why he was so rude with me. It was like he thought I was being a picky eater and he was treating me like a child who was being fussy. Honestly, I was too shy to complain at the time and figured it would just make me feel worse to make a scene but I regret that decision now. I should have complained to upper manager. One should never have to deal with feeling guilty about having a food allergy. It is hard enough for allergic person to feel safe eating out.

That being said, other than these two situations, I have had nothing but great experiences at Disney Restaurants. Usually all the staff at Disney go above and beyond to make me feel welcome and safe.

With the steak thing it does have to be cooked with something. If not butter, usually oil, or wine. If they didn't have either of those in the kitchen I could understand them being unable to do it if the small amount of butter used to cook is a problem for you. Not saying the attitudes are right but anise doesn't seem to be a normal ingredient and for lactose intolerance they typically do not get the chef as it is an intolerance not a life threatening allergy.

 

[DVC1991]

Update: I posted this originally earlier on in the meal. Eventually she stopped bringing us refills, rushed us along, and brought the check AND checked back to see if we had a card/cash in the booklet before begrudgingly saying she would bringing the allergy family member her special dessert (it was a buffet dinner so the rest of us were free to come and go for dessert). When we paid with magic band room charge, she snatched the touch screen device from my hand before I could finish typing my pin and left without explaining whether she was bringing a new receipt to sign. No thanks for coming or enjoy your night. Just walked away. We had to wait and flag her down to ask what we had to do.


It was a pretty frustrating experience. She had an attitude with us from the minute she saw the allergy paper on the table. We never even said anything to her before all this started. We agreed the food was good and every other cast member and character was an absolute pleasure to deal with.

We went to customer service and complained.

 

[MakiraMarlena]

it is possible that with the steaks, they may not have been able to completely avoid cross contamination, but they should have said so.

 

[Alexsandra]

With the steak thing it does have to be cooked with something. If not butter, usually oil, or wine. If they didn't have either of those in the kitchen I could understand them being unable to do it if the small amount of butter used to cook is a problem for you. Not saying the attitudes are right but anise doesn't seem to be a normal ingredient and for lactose intolerance they typically do not get the chef as it is an intolerance not a life threatening allergy.

I don't know why the chef did not want to serve me the steak plate. I have no trouble with oil or wine. Maybe it was because there was dairy in the sides dishes served with the steak like the vegetables or something like that but he did not mention it to me or offer to replace those. Usually a chef will modify a plate with steamed vegetables and a protein that can be cooked without dairy.

By the way, I have a dairy intolerance not a lactose intolerance which means I cannot eat dairy as it makes me sick but does not cause anaphylaxis. However my allergy to anise and to cold cuts (such as pepperoni, ham, and other processed meats) is deadly.Cross contamination is an issue. I carry an epipen and I have to be careful as a microscopic amount ingested can cause anaphylaxis, not to mention all the other unpleasant symptoms that occur. So I prefer talking to the chef to be sure what I am eating is safe and won't make me sick. I cannot tell you how many time there was anise hidden in many of the food served such as soups, dumplings or desserts.

Either way, I am always polite and try to be reasonable in my requests and do not deserve to be treated unkindly because of my allergies or intolerance.

 

[Alexsandra]

Update: I posted this originally earlier on in the meal. Eventually she stopped bringing us refills, rushed us along, and brought the check AND checked back to see if we had a card/cash in the booklet before begrudgingly saying she would bringing the allergy family member her special dessert (it was a buffet dinner so the rest of us were free to come and go for dessert). When we paid with magic band room charge, she snatched the touch screen device from my hand before I could finish typing my pin and left without explaining whether she was bringing a new receipt to sign. No thanks for coming or enjoy your night. Just walked away. We had to wait and flag her down to ask what we had to do.


It was a pretty frustrating experience. She had an attitude with us from the minute she saw the allergy paper on the table. We never even said anything to her before all this started. We agreed the food was good and every other cast member and character was an absolute pleasure to deal with.

We went to customer service and complained.

Good for you. I just don't understand the way she treated you. There was no reason for that whatsoever. Did customer service do something about it?

 

[Happy_Haunt999]

I don't know why the chef did not want to serve me the steak plate. I have no trouble with oil or wine. Maybe it was because there was dairy in the sides dishes served with the steak like the vegetables or something like that but he did not mention it to me or offer to replace those. Usually a chef will modify a plate with steamed vegetables and a protein that can be cooked without dairy.

By the way, I have a dairy intolerance not a lactose intolerance which means I cannot eat dairy as it makes me sick but does not cause anaphylaxis. However my allergy to anise and to cold cuts (such as pepperoni, ham, and other processed meats) is deadly.Cross contamination is an issue. I carry an epipen and I have to be careful as a microscopic amount ingested can cause anaphylaxis, not to mention all the other unpleasant symptoms that occur. So I prefer talking to the chef to be sure what I am eating is safe and won't make me sick. I cannot tell you how many time there was anise hidden in many of the food served such as soups, dumplings or desserts.

Either way, I am always polite and try to be reasonable in my requests and do not deserve to be treated unkindly because of my allergies or intolerance.

I know where you are coming from. I am the girl who is allergic to the world (yes I joke about it, but it's very serious). In your previous post, your complaint about the steak and the chef was valid, that sounds like the chef we had to deal with last fall at the Kona Cafe (maybe they moved him), as our chef there did the same exact thing to me and we ended up getting very, very ill from the meal in the end (even though he swore it was safe for my allergy-free needs). I have some spices, etc that I am allergic to and have to see the labels, book, whatever they have that lets me know EVERY ingredient in every thing that would possibly be on my plate because so much is hidden in recipes.
You def. have a friend in me here since I can completely relate.

 

[CynBeth]

I am sorry for the bad experiences. My Husband has a dairy allergy due to a medical condition he has and also can't have anything spicy hot like black pepper. My Mom actually has an issue with salt. Not that she has to watch it but it actually makes her sick if she has more than 600 mg a day. We have been to Disney several times including recently for Thanksgiving Week and our servers and chefs have always been great and my family has never felt they were a bother or made to feel bad and the chefs have put steaks in a pan with non dairy spray to avoid cross contamination. They have made special things for breakfasts or desserts for dinner and usually have come out to make sure the meal was ok.

 

[Micca]

I can overlook some mediocre service, a server overwhelmed with tables, having a bad day, etc.--it happens. I'd even still leave a reasonable tip. What OP is describing is way out of line. I'd be having a chat with the manager, and while I'd likely still leave a tip, it would be minimal. We had a server go south on us a couple of years ago at the HBD. Everything started out just fine, and somewhere along the line, her attitude and attentiveness just abrupbtly changed for the worse. Maybe she got a nasty text from an ex or something, but there was no excuse. Had a chat with with the manager, because we felt this needed to be noted. We got free desserts, but that wasn't our intent at all, we just wanted someone to know that the experience was comprised by her performance.

 

[Hibiscus]

You can complain and dock tip. I would do both and if the issue had ne asking for management then I would dock the tip even further than if it was just an off experience.

Not all restaurant managers go in the back and laugh about it with their staff. If it is a ligitament complaint I've heard waiters getting ripped a new one in the back. My fiance's mom manages restaurants and you better believe wait staff have been told to turn in their aprons and cash out after complaints were made.

I had to read this three times before I figured out that "ligitament" = legitimate. I kept reading it as "ligament" and was wondering what kind of meat they were serving these days.

 

[wilkeliza]

I had to read this three times before I figured out that "ligitament" = legitimate. I kept reading it as "ligament" and was wondering what kind of meat they were serving these days.

For some reason spell check doesn't work on the disboards from my phone and I am a terrible speller. Always have been no matter how I excelled in math or science. I'll just leave it be this time haha.

 

[Accident]

No. It would take quite a bit for me to complain. A server with a tude wouldn't be enough...we're thick skinned.

As someone with allergies and family where they would have minutes to get medical care to stay alive, this is not a thick skin situation. i'm with you any other time, but this is about someone allergy. Any hint that I can't trust the server to relay my food needs in the kitchen and I absolutely need to talk to someone who takes the situation more serious. We wouldn't even touch the food until we were sure it was safe so I would also go the manager route before even eating. I don't need free food or anything, I just need the food to not kill me.

 

[TheRustyScupper]

our waitress acts quite annoyed that one guest in our party has a nut allergy

1) I would need more details prior to making a comment.
2) In my personal experience,
. . . sometimes the CM does get rude.
. . . sometimes the guest is the one who is rude, or simply perceives the CM as rude.
3) With this posting, cannot tell who might be guilty.
4) In either case, on needs to call a manager IMMEDIATELY.
5) Talking after-the-fact leaves too many gaps for a manager or Guest Services to make a judgment

 

[kaytieeldr]

We went to customer service and complained.

In addition to taking the advice offered here, or instead of talking to a manager in the restaurant while you were dining?

 

[wdw&sonny]

To OP, first, sorry for your bad experience. As some have said, yours is a very subjective situation, from the details provided. It is difficult for us to gauge whether the waitress was truly being rude. However, if that was your impression, then I would suggest you TALK to the manager. I agree with others, that acting too offensive will make the manager defensive of his/her staff and likely not accomplish much. But, I have found if you suggest that the waitress was not very sensitive and might need further training for certain situations AND most importantly, IF you can provide factual evidence, not just opinion. For example, "she was rude" is very subjective, whereas, "she did not bring us the requested meal" is much more objective. Or "she was not caring about the nut allergy" is subjective. "She was unfamiliar with alternative menu selection for an allergic person" much more objective. Wow! just realized this whole thing sounds condescending. Sorry, part of my job to teach evidence-based writing.

 

[ChasingLeslie]

I think there's a big difference between "the server being rude" and the "the server making an allergy sufferer feel unsafe." I would have absolutely talked to the manager in this instance.