DH...the scrooge

[Nancyg56]

Errrrrr, I'm not sad others are not like me... In fact I would feel even worse if anyone was like me . Poor saps!

I just sense a lot of frustration/sadness/emotion of your choice... from other posters here regarding their husbands or even wives in some cases not care at all or have very little interest. I guess its just strange to me to hear people take separate vacations.

You sense wrong, I am not at all frustrated about our vacation choices. Not every couple can vacation together for every getaway. We are one of those couples. My DH loves WDW but there is no way he could go as many times as I like to go, and he would never ask me to stay home. Fortunately for us, we are comfortable enough to allow me to accompany my DD and her family on additional Disney treks. He also would hate to leave before dawn, drive for hours and follow my nieces when they participate in charity bike marathon rides, for a few days at a time. My DD, DGD and I love it, but my DH would rather poke his eye out with a fork. I would never ask him to go and place him in the awkward position of trying to put on a happy face. I send him pics all along the way, and we are all happy.

I also understand that for some people, the kind of planning that a WDW vacation requires is too much planning and too much structure. Others cannot comprehend it until they get there. Some folks then hate it.

I know that for some posters here, a vacation without their spouse is upsetting, but that is not the case for a lot of us. Please do assume we are sad about our choices, they work for us.

 

[Nancyg56]

My husband pays for the trip, get up on time on departure day and gets dressed, and puts the luggage in the truck. That's the extent of his help with the trip. If he doesn't like what I have planned oh well, he can go do his own thing for an hour or so. But, he always has fun and tells everyone how I plan the perfect trips. If your hubby doesn't want to get involved dont make him. Plan it the way you think will work best for your family and go with it!

LOL! Exactly! Years ago, we planned out first trip back in many years. My DH asked how much the trip cost, fainted ans then had very little to say other than he thought we were spending a fortune, Could we not go cheaper? No. Did we need to stay onsite? Yes. He honestly did not understand any of what we were doing, but because DD and DSIl thought we were making the best arrangements for our DGD, he went along.

First glance at WDW has was shocked. This was not the Disney he remembered when we took the kids. Nope. He told me that he was thankful for all of the planning, the careful decisions we made and it was the best money we every spent. OP- make plans, your DH will get it when you arrive.

 

[BooCar3126]

My BF is kind of the same way. We are planning on taking his/our kiddos down for their first trip in Oct. I have planned everything but part of that is I am big on structure and I have been there before. I ask him if he is excited and he says yes (he is not as big of a kid as i am). He does not like crowds, or heat (hence the reason we are going in Oct). He will talk about it with me if I keep bugging him, but he wont just bring it up on his own!

 

[Nancyg56]

My BF is kind of the same way. We are planning on taking his/our kiddos down for their first trip in Oct. I have planned everything but part of that is I am big on structure and I have been there before. I ask him if he is excited and he says yes (he is not as big of a kid as i am). He does not like crowds, or heat (hence the reason we are going in Oct). He will talk about it with me if I keep bugging him, but he wont just bring it up on his own!

You will love October! It is my favorite time to be there!. My DSIL cannot handle the heat so Summer is out. October seems to have it all, gorgeous weather, manageable crowds F&W Festival, and MNSSHP!

 

[KatieCharlotte]

Errrrrr, I'm not sad others are not like me... In fact I would feel even worse if anyone was like me . Poor saps!

I just sense a lot of frustration/sadness/emotion of your choice... from other posters here regarding their husbands or even wives in some cases not care at all or have very little interest. I guess its just strange to me to hear people take separate vacations.

I appreciate what you're saying. I don't think there's necessarily anything sad about occasional separate vacations. It's fun to leave the husbands home and go on a trip with girl friends, and someday I'd like to go to WDW with just my daughters. I've spent an evening alone at MK and had a great time. But it is a little disappointing when DH doesn't share my excitement about vacations that I'm planning for the whole family. The best part is sharing experiences together.

 

[SeattleSuz]

I appreciate what you're saying. I don't think there's necessarily anything sad about occasional separate vacations. It's fun to leave the husbands home and go on a trip with girl friends, and someday I'd like to go to WDW with just my daughters. I've spent an evening alone at MK and had a great time. But it is a little disappointing when DH doesn't share my excitement about vacations that I'm planning for the whole family. The best part is sharing experiences together.

Y'all are lucky ones who can take separate vacations! I did that once, with my mum, to DLR, and it was sooooooo much fun! I was trying to convince DH to let me do that again this fall, and take DD, but he wasn't having it.

 

[bopper]

I think we are married to the same guy. When planning our most recent trip, I asked DH for input regarding hotels. He said, "I don't care where we stay, but keep the price as low as possible so we have more spending money." I planned a split stay - two nights off site with SPG points and two nights at POP.

On our arrival day, we had lunch at the GF Cafe. DH complained that I hadn't booked us to stay there. Sigh.

That reminds me of a non-Disney vacation we went on with another couple. We were in the Florida keys, so I picked a room that was beach front. It was great...you could sit on your patio and read while looking at the ocean. The other couple's DH was a bit scroogey...when they were planning he wanted the best price room at the hotel. Once there were there, he was all "We should have gotten an ocean front room".

 

[SeattleSuz]

That reminds me of a non-Disney vacation we went on with another couple. We were in the Florida keys, so I picked a room that was beach front. It was great...you could sit on your patio and read while looking at the ocean. The other couple's DH was a bit scroogey...when they were planning he wanted the best price room at the hotel. Once there were there, he was all "We should have gotten an ocean front room".

That's the only part of our Disney vacations that DH is firm about, is which hotel we stay at on the beach part of our holiday. He did that in CA when we went to San Diego before DLR, he did it in FL when we went to Cocoa Beach before WDW and he's doing it again for MIA before our cruise. I think that's the only part he cares about, having a nice oceanfront room, so he can skip out to the waves as much as possible.

 

[Nancyg56]

That reminds me of a non-Disney vacation we went on with another couple. We were in the Florida keys, so I picked a room that was beach front. It was great...you could sit on your patio and read while looking at the ocean. The other couple's DH was a bit scroogey...when they were planning he wanted the best price room at the hotel. Once there were there, he was all "We should have gotten an ocean front room".

My DH exactly! If we stay on the beach, he insists on Beachfront with a balcony. He does not care what it costs, and it is the only thing he is firm about. I have to smile because he always says he "wants to go cheap" but he means he wants the best price for what we want.

 

[MichelleVW]

Y'all are lucky ones who can take separate vacations! I did that once, with my mum, to DLR, and it was sooooooo much fun! I was trying to convince DH to let me do that again this fall, and take DD, but he wasn't having it.

That's too bad and would never work for me lol! He doesn't like to go to Disney as often as I do and I'm not giving up my vacations!

 

[DeaverTex]

Based on our only trip so far, I'm the Disney planner. Mrs. Tex lets me hash out details of where and when, but she's deeply involved in the what -- reading over my shoulder (I love you too, dear) and dragging me into guide books and maps to figure out what we do and don't want to do. That's good, because separate vacations just wouldn't work for us.

Oh, and I'm also a Scrooge. In fact, I make Ebeneezer Scrooge and Scrooge McDuck look like a couple of newly paid sailors in Hong Kong for one night. Somehow, even though the prices give me the heebie-jeebies, Disney just seems to be worth it. How's that for fiscal responsiblilty?

 

[Granny square]

January wont be crowded. That is when we almost always go. It is perfect for your husband op. it is a long way away. Some people don't want to plan so far in advance. My husband would never care about Disney so far out.

 

[GaBelle]

Based on our only trip so far, I'm the Disney planner. Mrs. Tex lets me hash out details of where and when, but she's deeply involved in the what -- reading over my shoulder (I love you too, dear) and dragging me into guide books and maps to figure out what we do and don't want to do. That's good, because separate vacations just wouldn't work for us.

Oh, and I'm also a Scrooge. In fact, I make Ebeneezer Scrooge and Scrooge McDuck look like a couple of newly paid sailors in Hong Kong for one night. Somehow, even though the prices give me the heebie-jeebies, Disney just seems to be worth it. How's that for fiscal responsiblilty?

It's funny that you mention fiscal responsibility.
Because while DH may be a scrooge about the planning (and he does love to save a buck), he insists on a deluxe resort and DxDP. I tried multiple times while planning this trip to change to a mod or reg DDP. Nope! Not for Disney!

 

[elaine amj]

Based on our only trip so far, I'm the Disney planner. Mrs. Tex lets me hash out details of where and when, but she's deeply involved in the what -- reading over my shoulder (I love you too, dear) and dragging me into guide books and maps to figure out what we do and don't want to do. That's good, because separate vacations just wouldn't work for us.

Oh, and I'm also a Scrooge. In fact, I make Ebeneezer Scrooge and Scrooge McDuck look like a couple of newly paid sailors in Hong Kong for one night. Somehow, even though the prices give me the heebie-jeebies, Disney just seems to be worth it. How's that for fiscal responsiblilty?

Rofl. They put something addictive in the water!! We are frugal folks who don't mind splurging annually for Disney. Although...I get the fun of finding the best deals to do Disney

 

[luvthemouse71]

Perhaps these "grumpy" husbands would like to go on a vacation that interests them for a change- maybe one without the kids. Many couple don't put the same love and attention into their marriage that they do for their kids.

Some people just don't like Disney. I think for someone like that, the fact that they go at all should keep their spouse happy. Not all of us plan everything to the T either. Maybe backing off a bit would help.

 

[NLD]

I'm married to a WDW hater.

So like others have said, I go without him. Have been with just my sister; with my dd, my MIL and MIL's sister; and with my dd, my parents, and sister.

Next week I've got one day solo at DLR, tagged onto a work conference.

Works for us.

 

[NLD]

Oh. And I do agree about planning different family or spouse-only vacations. Dh doesn't enjoy travelling much to anywhere, so most times it's fine for me to spend our vacation dollars on Disney without him. But this year I really wanted a family vacation again, so we did Utah and Arizona. Fantastic trip... even dh, who wasn't looking forward to it, loved it. I knew he had loved the desert southwest last time he was out there, so that's how the destination got picked.

Now it'll be a while till I can do a proper Disney vacation, because those vacation dollars got spent out west, but it was more than worth it.

Actually I think I'm more addicted to national parks than Disney now, anyway. So maybe it'll be another NP vacation again, next, rather than Disney, even if I'm solo / sans dh.

 

[blondie511]

Wow, reading all these posts reminded me of our last family trip to Disney. My in-laws came as well. My hubby, 7 year old son and I were Disney "pros" - detailed itinerary in hand, snatching Fastpasses, waking up early for rope drops, making a beeline for headliner attractions, high energy go go go! My in-laws wanted to "try" Disney and were more interested in slowly pacing themselves, admiring the gardens, resting at fountains, chatting with cast members - nothing wrong with any of that - we all just had 2 totally different ideas on how to spend our vacation! My in-laws refused to split up from us so after a week of "dragging" them to hurry up and them "insisting" that we slow down our crazy obsession with Disney, we were all fighting so badly it was embarrassing! We didn't talk for weeks and it was truly the "most miserable place on earth" for all of us. My best advice that I will give is: have an open discussion BEFORE you go about what you want to do and HOW to approach it then don't be afriad to SPLIT UP if those ideas differ - meeting up as a group for ice cream or dinner later in the day, when each person is happy, is better than staying together and fighting. I learned the hard way (sad face....)

 

[HMANSION LOVER]

Wow, reading all these posts reminded me of our last family trip to Disney. My in-laws came as well. My hubby, 7 year old son and I were Disney "pros" - detailed itinerary in hand, snatching Fastpasses, waking up early for rope drops, making a beeline for headliner attractions, high energy go go go! My in-laws wanted to "try" Disney and were more interested in slowly pacing themselves, admiring the gardens, resting at fountains, chatting with cast members - nothing wrong with any of that - we all just had 2 totally different ideas on how to spend our vacation! My in-laws refused to split up from us so after a week of "dragging" them to hurry up and them "insisting" that we slow down our crazy obsession with Disney, we were all fighting so badly it was embarrassing! We didn't talk for weeks and it was truly the "most miserable place on earth" for all of us. My best advice that I will give is: have an open discussion BEFORE you go about what you want to do and HOW to approach it then don't be afriad to SPLIT UP if those ideas differ - meeting up as a group for ice cream or dinner later in the day, when each person is happy, is better than staying together and fighting. I learned the hard way (sad face....)

Have traveled with another family in the past. We did exactly that! We would split up and meet for lunch/dinner etc... Have heard others who had the same problem you had and it does not sound like fun. TRULY THE BEST ADVICE FOR PEOPLE TRAVELING IN GROUPS.

 

[jennylyn_b]

My DH and I do all the planning together for each trip (every 6 months). We are both major Disney addicts though.

If Dh doesn't want to be part of the planning then just tell him that's his choice and you will respect it but then he cannot complain at all when you get there.