Seriously? You really and truly believe you cannot control your child's behavior? And y'all think that's normal? And when they do this you just let them?
No wonder they keep doing it.
Actually, my children have both only had one tantrum in their lives, one. That is because I completely ignored them and walked away the first time they tried it. I haven't had the problem since. Some parents cannot ignore a tantrum so they don't stop like that straight away, but that doesn't make me a better parent!
No-one can control anyones behaviour, they can only
try to prevent it (distraction) and react (discipline). I find those who think they can control their children are absusive parents. I am not saying this about you, although you have no problem saying you think you're a better parent than anyone who has disagreed with you. I can guarantee you're not.
I could *write* a book but it wouldn't be helpful. The issue is not what I CAn do that other's can't, it is what I WILL do. It is 100% possible to raise a child who does not throw tantrums. You simply have to be willing to be consistent, firm and prepared to put your own personal desires second to the task of raising a kid who isn't a pain for those around you. This is not something most people are willing to do.
Anyone who tells you to "just let them scream" in a public place ought to be horsewhipped. No wonder there are so many places that nicely behaved children are no longer welcome.
Ignoring a childs bad behaviour is a classic, well known discipline technique that has been proved to work along side praising their good behaviour. I would have though a 'good' parent like you would know that.
Your book would only be helpful to other delusional parents in denial about their childs
real behaviour like you obviously are. I would be very upset if my children were perfect all the time. How boring would that be? I'd see those children as passive and easily led, which would worry me a lot as they grow up and get into the wrong groups at school.
I would rather have confident children who can express their feelings (sometimes in a tantrum believe it or not!) and feel safe and comfortable with telling me how they feel and if they disgree with something I have told them to do. That brings communication and negotiation, both invaluable skills for children to learn.
I'd imagine from your posts that you are not close to your children, and they wouldn't feel comfortable coming to you in their times of need if they feel they have to be quiet and perfect all the time around you.
So... some children are too horrible to behave themselves in public even if praented properly? I don't believe in selling them short like that.
I can't figure out if you're ill informed, delusional, or just plain ignorant. If you didn't have children I would understand your blinkered iews, but as you have, I think maybe you've dug yourself into a hole and have no other way out other than to dig further.
It would be interesting to see how our children will turn out. I'd bet most of us here will have happy, well behaved children, even if they do have tantrums! We are talking about a flight here.
Like I said before, if a child cries on a plane, it is most likely due to pain or fear. I will be flying on my own with a 5 year old and a 3 year old. I'm not naive or ignorant enough to think they won't cry or winge at some point. I will moan myself, it's a 9.5 hour flight, so how child I expect a young child to behave perfectly? You're extremely naive if you think your children will always behave the way you want them to. It's impossible, whatever you may say.
