Can I have a retirement party without booze?

[mrsstats]

I would like to have a small retirement party for my husband (30 people, mostly family) However, the cost to add alcohol to the party puts it out of my price range. Would it be ok just to have a cash bar??

 

[Bob NC]

Uh oh.

 

[luvpoohandcompany]

Definitely ok

 

[Polyluvr]

I personally wouldn't JMHO; Can you just do beer and wine ?

Is this in a hall or restaurant ?

 

[Snoozan]

Uh oh.

This is what I was thinking. I'm the OP on a post a few months back regarding cash bar vs. open bar at a wedding reception. After reading all the nasty remarks I got regarding the cash bar option(which is quite normal here in the New England area), I still decided to go with what I felt I could afford. I know people are grateful to get a drink or two free and won't think any less of the fact that it's not open bar all night.

Do what YOU can afford to do and don't let others talk you into something you're not comfortable with - unless they want to foot the bill for you!

 

[marcyinPA]

I think you can do whatever you want because it is your party, however Iwould either skip the alcohol completely (no cash bar), or I would put a bottle of wine on each table. That should not set you back too much $$.

 

[goofy4tink]

I would do a cash bar, but have a bottle of white and a bottle of red wine on each table.
I hate open bars...I think they are wasteful and lead to huge overdrinking issues. I know that when my mil died last fall, my dh's brothers decided to have an open bar after her funeral..at the collation. It was in a restaurant that mom had liked. Well.....I kept seeing all these half full drinks, just left around the room. I couldn't figure it out!!! well, that was because no one had told my dh and I that it was an open bar. Seems one brother thought the other brother had told us, and he thought that the other brother had...so, no one told us!!
But people put their drink down, walked away, and just went to the bar and got a new one!! Happens all the time. And you have to pay for that!!!! So, all those left behind drinks come out of your pocket.
Nope, really don't like open bars. Let people pay for their drinks, you pay for their meal and a few bottles of wine at each table.

 

[anniemae]

I personally don't like open bars. I do like the idea of a bottle of red & white at each table, then if guests want more they can pay for their own. Sometimes I have heard of people having an open bar for about an hour or so also. I still don't like that idea, I think it can be wasteful.

 

[clarkshel]

I agree, no open bar. Besides the waste that has been mentioned, people drink too much. I really hope this thread doesn't get nasty like the wedding reception one, but knowing DIS, it will.

 

[powellrj]

I would the do party without alcohol. Very few of the parties I attend do serve alcohol, so I never expect it.

 

[Skywalker]

I say do one way or the other - you provide alcohol or not. No cash bar. A cash bar at a retirement party is a new one to me, lol.

Even better if you can provide some sort of wine or champagne or something for toasting.

 

[bellarella]

What is it about alcohol that makes people lse their basic sense of etiquette?

Host: I can't afford to serve lobster at my party. Is It ok not to serve it?
Normal answer: Of course!

Host: I can't afford to serve lobster at my party. Is it ok for me to serve it, but charge the guests who eat it?
Normal answer: No, that would be rude. Serve what you can afford, but don't charge your guests to upgrade the menu.

Guest: I was at a party to celebrate a friend's milestone. They didn't serve lobster! Can you believe it?!?
Normal answer: You really cared what they served? You sound like the rude one.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

I would like to have a small retirement party for my husband (30 people, mostly family) However, the cost to add alcohol to the party puts it out of my price range. Would it be ok just to have a cash bar??

When my mom retired we did a brunch type meal on an early Sunday afternoon. Out of the 50 or so people invited only a handful ordered mimosas or bloody marys . Most people at least the ones I know dont drink alcohol at that time of the day.

The alcohol bill was not a huge added expense.

 

[mjkacmom]

It's really not fair for people who don't live in this area to say it's perfectly fine to have a cash bar at a party. The OP is on LI - I have friends and family there, have been to several parties and weddings, and a cash bar is unheard of. Sure, the OP can do whatever she wants, but yes, there will be talk.

OP, I live in NJ, and I've noticed a trend of having beer/wine only, instead of open bar. I think that would be a nice compromise. I would have it flowing though - a bottle will only give you 6 small glasses of wine.

 

[mjkacmom]

I would the do party without alcohol. Very few of the parties I attend do serve alcohol, so I never expect it.

But where do you live? I'm in my mid-40's, same area as the OP, and have never once been invited to a party without alcohol. I've rarely seen people get too drunk, and many still just drink soda.

 

[ronandannette]

I would like to have a small retirement party for my husband (30 people, mostly family) However, the cost to add alcohol to the party puts it out of my price range. Would it be ok just to have a cash bar??

If we're talking about mostly family make it a come-and-go open house at your place and BYOB.

 

[ArwenMarie]

Yeah, I agree with the previous poster...I live in the same area and I don't think you can have a party without some alcohol offered, even if only wine and beer.

 

[Bob NC]

Yeah, I agree with the previous poster...I live in the same area and I don't think you can have a party without some alcohol offered, even if only wine and beer.

Is this state law?

OP, you can do whatever you want and it will be fine.

I would assume if you are thinking of a cash bar, then that is something that would be fine with your circle of friends and family.

I would assume that if you thinking of having an alcohol free party, then that is something that would be fine with your circle of friends and family.

 

[powellrj]

But where do you live? I'm in my mid-40's, same area as the OP, and have never once been invited to a party without alcohol. I've rarely seen people get too drunk, and many still just drink soda.

I live in Indiana and its normal to have parties around here without alcohol. I see it more and more. When we were younger, alcohol was more common, but anymore I go to lots of parties without it. I will add that open houses seem to be the most common type of party anymore if that makes a difference.

 

[ArwenMarie]

Is this state law?

OP, you can do whatever you want and it will be fine.

I would assume if you are thinking of a cash bar, then that is something that would be fine with your circle of friends and family.

I would assume that if you thinking of having an alcohol free party, then that is something that would be fine with your circle of friends and family.

Of course it's not a state law, don't be silly!

Just that people might talk, that's all. I know these things vary by region greatly. With a small party of only 30 people, obviously, the people would be closer and less likely to talk, but on the other hand, with only thirty, it wouldn't be as hard to provide something.

JMHO!