Bridal Shower: Writing Your Own Address on the Envelope of a TY Card

[Andtototoo]

I remember doing this routinely decades ago when we lived on the east coast. So it's not new to me.

Nor does it bother me because to me, a shower IS all about the gifts. The point of a shower is to give/receive gifts. I don't view it as a "celebration" because that to me, would be an engagement party.

 

[Kalliope]

And like I said, I don't go to a shower and bring a gift because I expect a certain level of appreciation. I go and give a gift to support whomever the shower is being held for. But I guess that's where everyone is different, and I'm glad I'm surrounded by people of a similar mindset and not those who are so self-centered that they think a shower is AT ALL about them and what they deserve out of the situation.

And I meant 30+ minutes to write addresses (completely mindless thoughtless work), NOT write out the cards.

Expecting a thank you does not mean I am self-centered. It means I was raised knowing good manners.

 

[bsblady01]

we just did this for my sister's baby shower. it got the thank you cards out faster and we also used it for the door prize.

 

[Goofy_Disney_Dad]

Bride to be: "Hey, would you mind putting your address on this card for me?"

Me: "Of course I can do that".

Bride to be: "Thanks very much".

Me: "No problem".

 

[usd2bmd]

My husband's niece is getting married (tonight actually) and she did this at her shower. I also am not a fan. I'm old school in some thinking. If these people took time out of their day and money out of their wallet to show their joy for your wedding, the very least you could do is write and thank and address the envelope yourself.

 

[alicat8]

Expecting a thank you does not mean I am self-centered. It means I was raised knowing good manners.

Good manners that don't at all involve a desire to help others or give them a break by completing a simple task doesn't inconvenience you at all? Again, the level of "thank you" expected-not a note that is written to express gratitude for your gift-that's not enough, but the requirement of a bride-written address that makes the level of "thank you" ok.

 

[usd2bmd]

This reinforces my resolve to never attend a bridal shower again.

LOL... I'm inclined to agree.. I will send a gift but I dread them. I didn't even want to have my own. At the shower I just attended, one of the games was sort of a scavenger hunt about what you had in your purse. Different items had different point values. I was amused that food was on the list, confused when I saw rocks, but when I saw hand gun, I told my daughter if anyone said they had one we were out.

 

[CookieandOatmeal]

Good manners that don't at all involve a desire to help others or give them a break by completing a simple task doesn't inconvenience you at all? Again, the level of "thank you" expected-not a note that is written to express gratitude for your gift-that's not enough, but the requirement of a bride-written address that makes the level of "thank you" ok.

I don't think you're talking about having good manners. You're more talking about doing a good deed by filling out the address on the envelope and giving the bride a break.

 

[alicat8]

I don't think you're talking about having good manners. You're more talking about doing a good deed by filling out the address on the envelope and giving the bride a break.

That's exactly what I'm talking about. Because at the shower, it's not the bride who decided to ask people to fill out their addresses. So it's not the bride being tacky or lazy or rude (if you happen to consider the heinous act of writing your address on an envelope any of those things...) It's the host throwing the shower-asking you to help the bride. I find it weird that people have a problem with this. But I guess it's just another one of those things I see on the internet that I'm thankful not to understand...

 

[ZellyB]

I faithfully sent out thank yous for gifts given to me for bridal showers and baby showers because I was taught it is what you do and I genuinely appreciated the gifts.

I can honestly say that when I give a gift now for a shower or wedding I totally forget to even look for a thank you. I give the gift because I'm happy for the individual and want to give them something. I expect nothing in return. If I get a thank you note I appreciate the time and thoughtfulness the person put into sending it to me, but I never even give it a second thought if I don't get one. Most of the time, I don't think I even notice if I didn't get one. I certainly wouldn't have any problem filling out my own address on an envelope.

 

[CookieandOatmeal]

That's exactly what I'm talking about. Because at the shower, it's not the bride who decided to ask people to fill out their addresses. So it's not the bride being tacky or lazy or rude (if you happen to consider the heinous act of writing your address on an envelope any of those things...) It's the host throwing the shower-asking you to help the bride. I find it weird that people have a problem with this. But I guess it's just another one of those things I see on the internet that I'm thankful not to understand...

I still find it tacky regardless of who asked! To me doing a good deed is raising money for a cause or helping an elderly person by returning their shopping cart so they don't have to walk all that way. Good manners would be things like please, thank you, acknowledging nice things people do for you by writing/calling on your own without assistance from that person. But to each their own.

 

[wvjules]

can you imagine the twisted knickers if the thank you card was printed on a printer, or *gasp* a printed label?

I'm faint just thinking about it.

 

[Adelle Dazeem]

Gosh - the bride should just have thank you note forms with a blank line to enter whatever gift you gave her. You could even save her time by filling out your own thank you note with the gift you brought so the bride only has to sign her name. That would save her time as well. After all, it is all about the bride, right??

When a guest arrives, they should get the following form:

Dear __________, (Guest - please write your name here)

Thank so much for the _________________. (Guest - please enter what gift you gave bride here)

Love,

Lazy Bride who can't be bothered to take time to send a proper thank you even though you spent time shopping, wrapping, and driving to her shower

 

[lauracitawita]

Expecting a thank you does not mean I am self-centered. It means I was raised knowing good manners.

Expecting a thank you does not mean you were raised knowing good manners. I was raised to know good manners and therefore I would always send a thank you. I however would never expect one.

 

[teller80]

can you imagine the twisted knickers if the thank you card was printed on a printer, or *gasp* a printed label?

I'm faint just thinking about it.

I'm thinking bed bath and beyond could have a merge document on their registry, it would make life so much easier for the bride. When you buy your gift, input your mailing address, salutation, and the computer will track who gave what. All the bride would have to do is run the thank you's through her printer, sign them (unless she uses that field as well) affix the address label, and mail it out.

 

[Dizlvr]

I think in the interest of full disclosure those who think it's ok should state if it's what they did. It's like asking people who made an Akershus reservation only to blow it off to get to Anna & Elsa before everyone else if it's ok. Of course they see nothing improper about it, they did it!

Nope didn't do it, and don't care if anyone else chooses to do it, but I don't get myself in a tizzy because someone didn't sit down and personally write my address on an envelope. I don't have issues like that.

 

[brooke789]

I've never heard of it, but it seems like a really great idea.

 

[NFLDERS]

Count me in as not a fan either. Maybe I'm getting old and crabby, but I take the time to go shopping, wrap the gift, come to the party and now I have to write my own envelope? I always think that next I'll be asked to write my own thank you.

I had this at a graduation party this year too.

^ +1

 

[SanderMC]

I have to say that I have been surprised by this whole thread. What is the big deal about the envelope. I did this same exact thing for my sister when I threw her bridal shower to save her some time. For my own wedding shower I already had all the addresses in a document and just moved them into a label document and printed off the labels. Then I used the same document for my wedding thank yous, baby shower thank yous, and I use it for my Christmas cards too. In my mind the envelopes look a lot nicer with a printer label and are much more easily read.

In this day and age where half the time you don't even receive a thank you note, to me I don't care how the card is addressed. If everyone is this up in arms over the envelopes then I'm assuming you haven't heard of the new (and I think extremely tacky) way of doing thank yous. Printing up generic photo cards (like Christmas cards) that say thanks for spending our special day with us or something to that effect. Those are the thank yous that boil my blood.

 

[CookieandOatmeal]

can you imagine the twisted knickers if the thank you card was printed on a printer, or *gasp* a printed label?

I'm faint just thinking about it.

I don't find printed labels a problem. We did them for all our thank you cards. I just find asking the recipient of the TY card to be part of putting their TY card together a bit tacky. Want to save the bride some time? Ask the bridal party or MOB to do it then! If you emailed me a personalized TY , I wouldn't mind either!