Breastfeeding: Pro or Con? **Update Post #1**

[punkin]

Yikes! Nothing subtle about this.

And this is why non breastfeeding moms always feel so guilty.

I'm seriously impressed with your honesty!

When a breastfeeding mom is adamant about HER OWN breastfeeding, you tell her she's making others feel guilty, but when a someone rejects breastfeeding as having life "controlled by your breasts" you are impressed. I think you are a tiny bit biased here.

 

[jodifla]

Why? I am talking about myself only. You can do what you choose to do. Just because I tried hard to make it work for me, doesn't mean I expect you to do the same.

You seriously don't get how judgmental this sounds?

Lots of women try -- hard -- and it still doesn't work well.

 

[jodifla]

When a breastfeeding mom is adamant about HER OWN breastfeeding, you tell her she's making others feel guilty, but when a someone rejects breastfeeding as having life "controlled by your breasts" you are impressed. I think you are a tiny bit biased here.

I'm impressed with the honesty to go against what is so politically correct these days.

And yes, I'm probably biased since I was one of those moms who really struggled, brought in professional help, and still couldn't make it work. And while friends SAID they supported me...and most did...there were a couple "breast is best" friends who really made me feel terrible about not "sticking it out" -- even when the lactation consultant told me to supplement immediately because I was effectively STARVING my son.

 

[tonilea]

My friend is having a real hard time with breastfeeding. She is frustrated and I cannot help her. I tried for a few days and had to stop because my son was jaundiced and they told me they needed to measure more accurately.

I've heard EVERY argument known to parenthood, what are your feelings? And with your feelings, what are the long term results?

Not a debate, just personal experience.

I didn't read all the responses, but nursing was very important to me. It was also very difficult and painful at first. I can remember crying while DS nursed (I was 34, so not young), anyway, one day I was crying and after that it improved dramatically and was easy peasy. Encourage her to stick it out, if it is important to her.

 

[MrsJackSparrow4Life]

Not every woman's breast milk is superior to formula. Some babies are allergic to their mothers milk, some mothers do not produce enough to keep the baby full, some mothers have to take medication that make the milk toxic, etc.

Like I said before, I got lucky when it came to the BFing but sometimes it doesn't matter how hard you try, it just does not work. I would rather see a happy, well fed baby on formula than a miserable, hungry baby on breast milk (and I have seen both IRL).

 

[golfgal]

I voted, "Con - I won't even try it".

I have ZERO desire to breastfeed when I have children.

A baby controls your life enough on its own, let alone to add your BREASTS controlling your life! I'm serious. I have no desire to sit there and breastfeed to "bond". I'd much rather cuddle and kiss to bond, and send the baby to dad for feedings if I choose.

I in NO WAY want to depend on a pump when dad is feeding, or when baby is away, or when I am leaking....

I REALLY have no desire to have leaking nipples.

Or chapped, cracked nipples.

I just don't want it. Sorry.

I have ABSOLUTELY no problem with a mom who chooses to do this. Hey, more power to you! I choose not to let my life revolve around my breasts. If a mom chooses to do that, fine! I get it, "breast is best". Okay, good. For me, "formula will be just as good". I was fed Similac and I am alive and well to tell you about it here! My baby will be the same.

I am in NO WAY trying to change your mind but not every person experiences these things if they nurse. I did nurse but they also got an occasional bottle. I will tell you that nursing is a heck of a lot faster and easier then bottle feeding when you factor in making the bottles, washing the bottles, etc.

A baby really doesn't control your life, changes yes, but not controls unless you let that happen.

 

[Saphire]

You seriously don't get how judgmental this sounds?

Lots of women try -- hard -- and it still doesn't work well.

I found it hard to get into the routine of nursing an infant. And I found that in many ways it wasn't easy or convenient. I stuck with it because I thought it would be best for my babies.
Some women try hard and make it work, some try hard and can't get it to work, some give it a quick try, some don't want any part of it. All I was saying is that I was commited to it and it worked out well... but I know it is different for everyone!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I am completely pro bf. (not a militant though) I was fortunate that I was able to BF all of my children. (and still am!) As for others, well, if BF works then I think that is what should be done. However, if a Mom is getting stressed out everytime she has to nurse and is frazzled etc. then maybe BF is not for her. In that case I think that FF is just fine. At the end of the day feeding time should be stress free and as long as the baby is getting what they need to thrive then that is what the Mom should do.

As for making others feel guilty etc. nobody can make somebody feel anything. That is something that we all bring upon ourselves that extends to everything we do. I do also believe that some mothers are simply too lazy to bother and then claim it didn't work for them. Now I don't care if you ff or bf but don't spout off nonsense about how it didn't work for you. Make your decision and be okay with it. Only you know what is best for your own family.

Oh- FTR- I was never had chapped bleeding and sleep deprived. I sleep great. In fact I co-sleep and there is no way I would want to haul my butt out of bed to make bottles at night. Of course that is what works for me. I personally don't care what others chose.

ETA- My breasts don't control my life. Although that would be quite entertaining if they did.

 

[Pooh Crew]

I loved nursing my babies! I nursed my triplets until I found out I was pg with baby #4--surprise baby--I was already in my second trimester, so dr was concerned the nursing could cause contractions. Anyway, I loved that "down time". It was the only time when I could not do anything else because I was nursing the babies. I loved being able to sit in our recliner with one or two babies in my lap and just soak up the moment. I treasure those days and knowing how fast they go by, I'd do it again and longer!

I hated pumping and quit after a few months...it was just easier to nurse and go.

I nursed baby #4 until he was almost two. He never had a bottle!

ETA: had a few problems in the very beginning, but they quickly passed. I really wanted to bf because my babies were preemies and the drs said the breastmilk was so good for them. Nothing I experienced ever made me want to stop bf'ing.

 

[CaliforniaDreamin]

My Pros and Cons:

Pros:
Free
Availability
Antibodies

Cons:
Time Consuming
Breast Pain
Leakage
Pumping
DH felt left out
Feeding in public

Reading this thread has reminded me of one BIG Pro and one BIG Con.

Pro: NO PERIOD!!! That was a blessing for me, as I have horrible cramps. I didn't get a period again until I started weaning DD at 10 months. I had one period, got pregnant again and nursed another 11 months with second DD. So in over 3 years, I only had one period.
Con: Milk leaking even when a baby other than yours is crying! It's funny now, but it was kinda frustrating at the time. I'd be at the store with my nice sleeping baby in the carrier, another baby would cry, my milk would let down and that would wake my sleeping baby up! It's amazing how well a baby can smell and wake up when your milk lets down.

 

[grafxgirl]

I went to LaLeche league meetings BEFORE my baby came-to get tips from breastfeeding Moms. Your friend could still try to find a meeting-they occur in most towns and cities.


My breast fed kids did not go to the doctor as much as my friends babies who were bottle fed-that plus its FREE were two BIG pluses

I can't agree totally with this statement. My sister breastfed both her babies and both have been sickly kids from the time they were born. Her son had multiple ear infections, tubes in his ears twice, has seizures, has asthma, and is consistently sick with some kind of cold or virus. Her daughter had all the same things except for the seizures.

My kids were both bottle fed. My daughter does have IBS, which is controlled with diet. My son had tubes in his ears due to ear infections and he has asthma too. All 3 "illnesses" that my kids had/have are genetic. As you can see my sister's kids also inherited the ear infection issue and asthma. However, my kids rarely get sick with colds or viruses.

I think how well or sick kids are depends totally on genetics and how well the parents teach them proper hygiene. I don't necessarily believe the whole breastfeeding yields healthier babies, but if a person wants to breastfeed then I say Go for It!

 

[jodifla]

I found it hard to get into the routine of nursing an infant. And I found that in many ways it wasn't easy or convenient. I stuck with it because I thought it would be best for my babies.
Some women try hard and make it work, some try hard and can't get it to work, some give it a quick try, some don't want any part of it. All I was saying is that I was commited to it and it worked out well... but I know it is different for everyone!

You know, I apologize. This was a very nice post, and I was reading things into your other posts that you didn't mean.

Sorry.

 

[grafxgirl]

Not from what I've seen. I didn't breastfeed and I lost the weight quickly, and I know many people that breastfed and they all had problems losing the weight. I still think that's something pro breast feeders tell you to push you to their side.

I didn't breastfeed either and lost the 20 lbs I gained during my pregnancy plus an additional 20 lbs within 6 weeks after having my daughter. I lost the 15 lbs plus 15 lbs extra within 6 weeks after having my son 3 years later. I attribute it to good exercise and diet during my pregnancies. I didn't have the mentality that some women have about "I can eat whatever I want because it's for the baby". I worked with a nutritionist who helped me make sure I was eating enough calories, and a balanced diet along with the right amount of exercise the entire time.

 

[HelenePA]

OMG the no period thing ROCKS! I didn't get i back until he was 19 months old! I never had dry, cracked,, chapped nipples, mine NEVER hurt (unless I tried pumping!) my breast did not rule my life with an infant at ALL! He has had one ear infection and did not get the flu when the rest of us had it or that awful stomach bug that was going around last christmas. He didn't get that either... He had all his teeth by 1 year they started coming in at 2 months (no joke) and by 6 months he had about 8. He never bit me, drew blood, chewed on me.. I do wish I would have tried with the other 3 but I can't go back and know what I do now.. I'm very lucky it was sooo easy with him I guess! I also co slept so I was not a zombie walking into walls. I slept he ate.. win win

 

[JoanneMouse]

I was on the fence about breastfeeding. Before my DS's birth I had bought the book breastfeeding for dummies. I read the entire book so that I felt like I knew something. This book was my savior! It really, really helped!
I recommend ANYONE is thinking about breastfeeding to seriously set SMALL goals for themselves. Don't automatically say okay I am going to do this for 6 months or a year. GIve smaller increments than that. It is a very overwhelming experience (for your first time that is) and omg 3 weeks into it I thought I was going to quit....
I ended up pumping and my child was on breastmilk for over 7 months. He had a traumatic experience at birth and it caused him to never really properly latch.
I set small goals.....like I will do this for a month. Then a month came and I would say okay I can do this for 2 more months etc. I was so proud of myself. It was such an accomplishment. When I reached that 7 month mark I was just so happy and I was able to feel good about what I did for him for that amount of time. I didn't feel guilty. I put my all into it.
Whatever you do it is fine. Either way your baby will be fine.

 

[torinsmom]

I hear this a lot and I'm curious about this. This has not been my personal experience at all so I wonder if this is across the board.

Not mine either. DS was on formula, while my sister's two were BF'd. Her oldest has asthma and allergies, and had ear infections constantly for his first 5 years. He had to have three sets of tubes. Her youngest also had lots of ear infections, though not as many as his brother. My DS had very few ear infections and has always been healthy. As far as intelligence, they are all really bright kids.

I was 23 when I had DS and I had no interest in breastfeeding. I did not want to feel uncomfortable in public and stop taking the meds I needed for chronic headaches(I had to stop for the 9 months I was pregnant) I feel like I bonded really well with DS; we have always been very close.

I am pro-choice, as far as breastfeeding. If you want to, go for it. If you don't, no big deal. Its a personal choice, plain and simple.

 

[MaumeeMom]

Reading this thread has reminded me of one BIG Pro and one BIG Con.

Pro: NO PERIOD!!! That was a blessing for me, as I have horrible cramps. I didn't get a period again until I started weaning DD at 10 months. I had one period, got pregnant again and nursed another 11 months with second DD. So in over 3 years, I only had one period.
Con: Milk leaking even when a baby other than yours is crying! It's funny now, but it was kinda frustrating at the time. I'd be at the store with my nice sleeping baby in the carrier, another baby would cry, my milk would let down and that would wake my sleeping baby up! It's amazing how well a baby can smell and wake up when your milk lets down.

Lucky you! I had horrible periods after my kids. After DS#2 they came every two weeks and were heavy, even with breast feeding. They finally became regular by the time he was two - they came every three weeks and lasted 7 days. But, I know that this is very rare and have actually had something done to help.

I'm with you on the leaking. I had it happen at work - so embarrassing! Eventually, I was able to manage during work hours (I couldn't pump) but every now and then - YIKES!

I popped a button once. I was so excited to wear a non maternity blouse when I first returned to work. As the day progressed, I grew and grew and POP! the button came undone and I couldn't keep it fastened - I had to put on my sweater!

The worst is shooting milk across the room though.

 

[grafxgirl]

I was able to breastfeed DD, and thankfully, it was true for us. DD seemed to get less sick than some of the other FF kids her age. I do agree that it probably has a lot more to do with them being in daycare or not.

Breastmilk does contain antibodies that the mother's immune system produces. So, whatever germs the mom is exposed to, she passes antibodies for them on to her baby.

http://www.kellymom.com/newman/how_breastmilk_protects_newborns.html

All babies receive antibodies from their mothers through the placenta.

 

[pigletgirl]

I really don't know. I haven't thought about it much. I do know one thing, no breastfeeding in public for me! That is TMI...

 

[Nancy]

The guilt is overwhelmimg. I have two children and milk never came in with either one of them. My doctor had no answers. That didn't stop the lactation nazis (that's what my husband and I called them as well) from waking me up every day when I managed a nap to see if I wanted to try again.

Thank God for my sister who talked me out of the guilt and brought formula. I was finally able to relax.

Mine never came in with all 3 of mine. My first I tried for days...what we had was a miserable baby, a very overtired and frustrated mom and a very tired dad,..who was on the verge of being miserable. One night after almost no sleep for days I decided to make up a bottle. She sucked down 3 ounces and was still crying, burbed her and gave her more..and then she slept for 7 hours...and so did mommy. I figured it was better for everyone if we were all happy.

My kids are healthy, happy and we had no issues with bonding...bottle fed babies get snuggled just as close while getting the bottle.

Luckily I never had to deal with anyone telling me I was making a wrong choice. Even with #2 and 3 when I told them in the hospital that we were doing bottles I heard nothing. The only time they were shocked was when they tried to give me meds to help "dry me up" and I told them not to bother since I wouldn't need it. Funny thing, every talks about getting huge while pregnant..not me, I wore the same size bra as I did when not pregnant.

Anyhow...I didn't answer the poll because nothing fit for me. I am not con and I'm not pro..I really have no feelings about it one way or the other. I just wish woman/other moms would stop dumping on those that don't make the same choice as them.