Vija - just dropping in for a minute here.
You hang in there and go do this for you! Forget everyone else.
Believe me, I know how you feel. I put myself on the starting line of a major race at nearly 350 lbs, like I told you.
Instead of the "unbelievable failure" I thought I would be - just look at the support I got.
As I also put in my report of the Disney experience, I had "gazelles" shouting words of support on their way back to the finish line as I was pushing forward.
I bet that more folks will support you rather than ridicule you, and , if they do the latter, they have more problems than you.
Maybe they'd like to strap on 100 lbs and try it!
I continue to "race", as you know, despite my size because I love it. There are undoubtedly some that feel I should not be there, but who cares about them?
It only matters that you are doing it and we all have to start somewhere.
So keep your head up high, put on that "marshmallow" suit as you call it, go do your modified moves and write to me later.
Linda

Yeah Vija!
P.S. If there are any "gazelles" on this list, keep shouting out the words of encouragement, it means the world to folks like me and gets me to the start line.
