...And Then Scotty Happened. A Hawaiian Adventure (CHAPTER 32 Added 5/23--THE END)

[KatMark]

Well, we didn't expect Scotty to buy any.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

I've just finished all your Aulani posts and you have me very excited about the prospect of staying there. I have all fingers and toes firmly crossed that some points come through with the brokers.

I hope it works out! You won't be disappointed!

Also, we had no intention of doing any excursions except the Pearl Harbour one. But that Japanese temple you visited looks stunning - especially surrounded by those beautiful mountains. You've got me thinking.

Definitely worth the trip to see the island. I would highly recommend hiking to the top of Diamond Head as well.

Congrats on the upcoming addition to your whanau (the Maori word for 'family'). From your TR's I can tell that this lucky baby is being born into a very loving family.

Thanks so much! We can't wait to meet the little one. And I'm going to have to start using the word "whanau" in conversation, because it's cool to say anything in Maori.

I just love the geek posts. I had no idea about the size of the mountains in comparison, thanks for sharing!

I'm glad you enjoyed them! So much fascinating stuff out there. Personally, I'm proud that the largest mountain in the world is actually in the good 'ol U.S. of A.

I love all the science geek references. I am a geek too inside all the Disney smokescreen!

Don't worry, your secret is safe with me!

I hope everything goes well for you Julie with the birthing process. I have no clue on what to guess regarding the baby, I just hope that you have a healthy one and give it lots of love!

Sounds like a plan to me!

I'm sad to hear about the road being wiped out around the Crater. It was a great drive around when we did it back in the 90's before the lava flows took over. I'm looking forward to hearing about the rest of your trip!

Well, the road is still there. They've just closed a portion of it so tourists don't poison themselves to death. I'm sure it'll be re-opened if/when Kilauea goes inactive again.

Good luck with the newest addition!

Baby Watch Time! I'm guessing girl and I'm guessing she will come when we have bad weather. That's as far as I'm going. But its a girl. I just know it!

We shall find out soon enough! Not so happy with the bad weather prediction, though...

Great update, but I am getting really nervous about the no snacks or food. This is SO night like you guys to not have PB&J or at the very least, cheese balls. You are certainly NOT going to win parent of the year awards with this poor planning.

I must say mea culpa on the cheese balls.

Love the pictures. What an amazing place. It looks well worth the 100 or so winding miles to get there. That cave is super cool.

Very cool! This was our one chance to see active volcanoes--totally worth a 100-mile drive!

OK - now don't make us wait two weeks to find out if the kids needed to eat dirt and drink water off of tree leaves to fend off hunger.

Yes ma'am!

 

[afwdwfan]

Just wanted to announce that we are now officially under a Baby Watch. Julie is officially due on Feb. 5, but she was 2 weeks early with David and 3 weeks early with Scotty, so we're in that window when it could happen at any time.

Wow. I didn't realize it was that close. Good luck.

Feel free to send in your guesses as to the gender, birth date and time, weight, etc.

I was going to say boy, Jan 25, 1:05 am, 7 lbs 14 oz. And if that's the case, God help you, because I just described DS.

Because its eruptions have generally tended toward slow, smooth lava flows, it’s known as a “shield volcano”, due to its gently sloping shape to a cone at the top.

A shield volcano, hmm??? So is this where Samuel L Jackson has his secret volcano lair????

I’m guessing it’s a euphemism for “pot”.

We'll just go with that, then.

“Uhhhh…looks like we do not.”

Come on, can't you see that yourself. It's like you're oblivious or something.

Again, this caused much consternation for Stoney, and he furrowed his brow much like I used to do whenever Andy Reid would call another screen pass on 3rd-and-17 in the 4th quarter.

Come on, Mark. Let it go. It's Chip Kelley's fault this time around.

If you stopped by a bakery specializing in coffee and pastries at 7:00 in the morning, you wouldn’t expect them to be fully stocked, would you?

Unless they really, actually make their money selling "pot."

Julie said her latte tasted like Valvoline.

So they were serving Nescrape?

Keep in mind that we hadn’t made a Costco run since we were only going to be on the island for 2 days. There was no PB&J or other snacks in the car.

I can't believe there's going to be an oblivious family road trip without any PB&J.

Unfortunately, the part of the road that is closed includes the Halema’uma’u overlook, from which you can peer into the deepest part of the crater and actually see the lava pool. They did set up a webcam so you can see what it looks like, though. Here’s the link:

We didn't come all the way to Hawaii to look at a webcam. Somebody better have a gas mask somewhere around here...

They had various samples of lava you could touch as well. Pahoehoe is smooth and gooey before it hardens as it cools, like nature’s version of the chocolate shell on your ice cream. A’a is rocky and chunky, which obviously makes it the Oreo crumbs in this tortured metaphor.

Mmmmmm... delicious, tasty rock...

Nature has nothing similar to Scotty, though. He just happens.

Shoulda seen those rocks after he got done with them...

Here’s the entrance to the lava tube. Raise your hand if, like me, you expected a guy in a leather jacket and a fedora and a giant boulder to come rolling out of this cave at any moment.

I'm not sure what to expect, but I think I'd send Scotty in first just to check it out.

There’s not much else to say except it’s really cool inside. Literally and figuratively speaking.

Very descriptive.

Coming Up Next: Hikes! More hikes! And did I mention that this park is in the middle of nowhere with few options for lunch available?

Are those little red spikey flower things edible?

Won't SOMEBODy think of the pregnant lady and get her some food?!

Um Mark... I think the pregnant lady is hungry. And I'm not 100% sure she's talking about Hawaii anymore.

Male- Jan 16 3:24 a.m. 12lb 14oz, full head of hair

Come on man... What did Julie ever do to you to make you say that? She's going to hate you.

Oh snap! They had a jagermeister museum there?

Oh, I thought it was a Rolling Stones museum... Either one works for me.

 

[eandesmom]

Real Life Update:

Happy New Year! I hope everyone had a nice, restful holiday season. I wasn't at work, so mine was great.

Just wanted to announce that we are now officially under a Baby Watch. Julie is officially due on Feb. 5, but she was 2 weeks early with David and 3 weeks early with Scotty, so we're in that window when it could happen at any time. Feel free to send in your guesses as to the gender, birth date and time, weight, etc.

Need rank and serial number (aka weight etc for the others) to accurately predict.

Now, back to our regularly scheduled program.

________________________________________________________________

They call it “The Big Island” for a reason.

Our goal for the day was to explore Hawaii Volcanoes National Park. As the crow flies, it’s about 48 miles from the town of Kona. The only thing standing in the way is the most massive mountain in the world.

Anyway, why do we care? Well, that mountain was in between point A and point B for us. There’s no road over the top of the mountain. So you have to go around it. Which meant that our drive was going to be closer to 100 miles on a curvy 2-lane road cut into the sides of the mountain slopes. The speed limit was 35 mph for a good portion of the drive, getting up to 50 mph on the flatter sections. In other words, this was going to take a while. There’d better be something worthwhile at the other end. Like natural phenomena of a kind not normally witnessed in Delaware, for example.

Not exactly just around the corner was it!

We set off fairly early in the morning, as we not only had a lot of ground to cover, but a lot we wanted to see. Our first stop was for breakfast: there weren’t many choices south of town, but the guidebook had made mention of a little hole-in-the-wall bakery called Coffees ‘n Epicurea. And no, I have no idea what “epicurea” means and was too lazy to look it up. I’m guessing it’s a euphemism for “pot”.

Oh my, quite the experience. Memorable though so that's something????

At one point, there was a side road leading to the Southernmost Point in the United States. It’s helpfully called South Point Road. We had considered it, but it’s an 11-mile side trip down a partially dirt road, and there’s no memorial or anything very memorable at the end. You just stand at a cliff edge and proclaim yourself to be standing at the southernmost point in the U.S. We figured we were already further south than anywhere on the mainland and could see the end from a convenient overlook on the main road, so that was close enough for us.

No memorial? What about this?



or this?



This?



or maybe



oh wait, here it is!!!



Probably a good call not to do it, it was a good hour detour I think. Very cool (I'll spare you Jeff's end of the earth picture montage) and you really do feel like you are at the end of everything but the kids would likely have been bored out of their minds unless looking at the wind turbines is fun. Then again, they are your kids so maybe...

We left the museum and drove towards Chain of Craters Road. Don’t worry, you haven’t seen the last of Kilauea. Our next stop was a trail for the Thurston Lava Tube. The trail led us through a dense tropical forest. Even though we’d now been in Hawaii for almost 2 weeks, it was still stunning how quickly we could travel between dry, rocky terrain and lush jungle.

Pretty cool!

Here’s the entrance to the lava tube. Raise your hand if, like me, you expected a guy in a leather jacket and a fedora and a giant boulder to come rolling out of this cave at any moment.

The lava tube was formed when conditions cause the surface of a lava flow to cool, while the rest still flows underneath. Eventually it empties and leaves the empty cave behind. In this case, it left behind a 1/2-mile hike through a dark cave. There’s not much else to say except it’s really cool inside. Literally and figuratively speaking.

no fedora, just me expecting Jeff to whack his head.

At this point, it was still mid-morning and we had a lot more of the park to cover. And no snacks or lunch supplies in the car.

Coming Up Next: Hikes! More hikes! And did I mention that this park is in the middle of nowhere with few options for lunch available?

Ruh row.....

 

[glennbo123]

Just caught up on, oh, about 5 chapters. Loved the anniversary pictures and am enjoying seeing Volcano National Park.

The baby will be a girl, 7 lbs, 10 oz, born on Jan. 21st, 9am.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

So you’re suffering from a Brain Cloud too?
Good thing you brought those steamer trunks

+1

Some would argue that I've been suffering from a Brain Cloud since day 1.

Couldn’t even begin to come up with a rational guess, so I’ll just offer up my wish and prayers for as smooth a delivery as possible and for another very healthy Oblivious child to grace the world.

Thank you, sir.

There was a schedule?

More like guidelines, actually.

Because they ran out of new combinations for the letters: A, E, H, I, K, L, M, N, O, P, U & W?

It's as good a reason as any.

So I’m guessing at this point that, not being crows, y’all were going to have to travel just a might farther to reach that particular destination.

Plus we didn't bring our helicopter, as Tim pointed out.

So… did the car rental agency have a rule forbiding you from driving their vehicle on this road as well?

Like it would have mattered…
That rule was more like a guideline in the first place.

There actually is a restriction against driving on the "saddle road" between the two mountains across the middle of the island. But that route would have been longer anyway, so it didn't concern us much.

Nor anywhere else in the Eastern US for that matter…

We're pretty boring, huh?

Means: “good food and drink”.
So technically, it’s a little bit redundant as used here.
And possibly a bit optimistic…

My mistake, then, for walking in and expecting food and drink.

I don’t know…
sounds like you’d already left civilization when you arrived here.

In retrospect, that does appear to be the case.

My general rule is that if you’re going to put a specific item in the name of the shop…
you better be good at making that particular item in the first place.

Exactly.

But you do have a good story.
No breakfast to speak of, but a good story.

That's one of our mottos: Keep trying new things. You either discover something you love, or you have a great story.

Hummmmm…
This does not bode well.

** queue subtly ominous background music**

Not so subtle, if you read the commentary.

Nice?
I think I’d rather receive total consciousness on my death bed at this point.
But then again, if I ever get out there, I’ll make the drive as well.

That's what keeps you going. The knowledge that whatever's at the end of the road is worth it.

Just not with the inclusion of a stop at “Coffees ‘n Epicurea”

We'll have a better recommendation for you the following morning.

Very cool…
Wish you could have seen it directly though.

If we'd had more time, I'm sure we would have gone for it. But there was a lot to pack into the day.

You must have a single story house or you’d have that unsettling thought every time you were upstairs and the young’ens were downstairs.

** Queue shower scene music from “Psycho” **

I can’t help it!
I was born that way…

Me too.

And that is as it should be.

I shudder to think what this 4th kid is going to do to us.

Ahemm…
I’m still here ya’ know.

Me too.

** Hand Raised **

Good thiing you didn’t chose the wrong friends.

This is it. This is where Forrestal cashed in.

**Queue up dark ominous music **

A whole lot of those rumbling bass strings happening here.

Sounds like you’ll be working up quit the apatite.

I really thought there'd be a fast-food option or something in the area.

Yes… yes you did.

** Dark ominous swells to a fever pitch **

** Sudden cut to darkness and silence **

** silence**

** silence**

** more silence**



** Queue: Maniacal Laugh **

You didn't tell me I was in a horror story!

 

[DawnFeiss]

Hi glad the holidays were great. I on the other hand worked them all ugh!! Costco got to love it. My guess is Jan 28th boy and 8'7oz

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Thanks for the great update. Hopefully no one took any of those lava rocks home (cue Greg Brady mystery music ) I do hope you found some food for Julie. I remember those days all too well and I would not have been happy.

As always, we end up improvising. And no, we didn't take any lava rocks home. I heard it was much like stealing Aztec gold--you bring a terrible curse home with it.

Prayers for a smooth and easy delivery for Julie. I say Jan. 26th and girl (for no other reason than it is my mom's birthday and well, she is a girl).

Well since Mark's birthday is the 15th and my bosses is the 17th (he'll be 88), I'm going to pick the 16th, a girl and she will weigh 8lbs. 8 oz.

For Sarah's sake, I am going to say a girl. I will go with Feb. 1 with 7lbs 4oz.

Duly noted!

Ut Oh…. now you really have to start behaving yourself.

I tell ya, Julie's got spies everywhere.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Well, we didn't expect Scotty to buy any.

He would have eaten them before we made it back to the car.

Isn't this where I tell you to sit on a tack or something?

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Wow. I didn't realize it was that close. Good luck.

Thanks! And you're all counting on me, right?

It does seem like that 9 months went by quickly.

I was going to say boy, Jan 25, 1:05 am, 7 lbs 14 oz. And if that's the case, God help you, because I just described DS.

Actually, he seems like a cool kid from what I can tell.

A shield volcano, hmm??? So is this where Samuel L Jackson has his secret volcano lair????

That would be awesome! And instantly cooler than anything on the current SHIELD TV show.

We'll just go with that, then.

See? I knew I was right.

Come on, can't you see that yourself. It's like you're oblivious or something.

And here I thought the bakery might, you know, be actually baking something.

Come on, Mark. Let it go. It's Chip Kelley's fault this time around.

Chip Kelly hasn't been around enough to develop any annoying habits yet. Besides, we're all still grateful to have made the playoffs after last year's train wreck of a season.

Unless they really, actually make their money selling "pot."

You might be onto something there.

So they were serving Nescrape?

We were definitely in that ballpark.

I can't believe there's going to be an oblivious family road trip without any PB&J.

To tell the truth, even we get sick of PB&J occasionally.

We didn't come all the way to Hawaii to look at a webcam. Somebody better have a gas mask somewhere around here...

I'll let you take that up with the park ranger. But don't worry, we found something cool to do here later.

Mmmmmm... delicious, tasty rock...

I guess it's better with Oreos?

Shoulda seen those rocks after he got done with them...

I'm not sure what to expect, but I think I'd send Scotty in first just to check it out.

Good idea. The scouts are always expendable, right?

Very descriptive.

Inside, we saw...things.

Are those little red spikey flower things edible?

We might have to try it out. Scotty, come here!

Um Mark... I think the pregnant lady is hungry. And I'm not 100% sure she's talking about Hawaii anymore.

Come on man... What did Julie ever do to you to make you say that? She's going to hate you.

That was my first reaction, too!

Oh, I thought it was a Rolling Stones museum... Either one works for me.

You know, some of those lava rocks did resemble Keith Richards.

 

[KatMark]

Isn't this where I tell you to sit on a tack or something?

Tit for tat; I guess it would.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Need rank and serial number (aka weight etc for the others) to accurately predict.

Julie just posted that info on FB the other day. I'll see if I can find it and post it here.

Not exactly just around the corner was it!

In the same sense that ghost chilis are not exactly good for mild sauce.

Oh my, quite the experience. Memorable though so that's something????

Like we say, it's a good story! My kids enjoy the stoner-dude voice in the re-telling.

No memorial? What about this?



or this?



This?



or maybe

You certainly came prepared!

oh wait, here it is!!!

Well, there you go. Given all we wanted to see that day, I feel justified in not making the trip.

Probably a good call not to do it, it was a good hour detour I think. Very cool (I'll spare you Jeff's end of the earth picture montage) and you really do feel like you are at the end of everything but the kids would likely have been bored out of their minds unless looking at the wind turbines is fun. Then again, they are your kids so maybe...

What are you trying to say here?

Just kidding, we are pretty nerdy. But then again, you can only stare at a windmill for so long. If we'd had more time on the island, we probably would have made the trip.

Pretty cool!

no fedora, just me expecting Jeff to whack his head.

Does this happen often?

Ruh row.....

Not even a Scooby snack!

Just caught up on, oh, about 5 chapters. Loved the anniversary pictures and am enjoying seeing Volcano National Park.

Welcome back Glenn! How many times did you fall asleep during those 5 chapters?

The baby will be a girl, 7 lbs, 10 oz, born on Jan. 21st, 9am.

9 a.m. sounds pretty good. As long as it's not an all-night labor.

Hi glad the holidays were great. I on the other hand worked them all ugh!! Costco got to love it. My guess is Jan 28th boy and 8'7oz

Sorry about your holiday schedule. Thanks for joining in!

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Need rank and serial number (aka weight etc for the others) to accurately predict.

Here's the data for the previous kids:

Sarah--due 2/3, born 2/5, weight 7 lbs. 9 oz.
David--due 5/5, born 4/17, 8 lbs. 7 oz.
Scotty--due 4/30, born 4/12, 8 lbs. 4 oz.

 

[eandesmom]

Here's the data for the previous kids:

Sarah--due 2/3, born 2/5, weight 7 lbs. 9 oz.
David--due 5/5, born 4/17, 8 lbs. 7 oz.
Scotty--due 4/30, born 4/12, 8 lbs. 4 oz.

Girl, I'd like to say 8 lbs. 2oz, 2/7 (Because it's my birthday). But it is more likely to be girl, 7 lbs, 11 oz, 1/28.

 

[Steppesister]

Finally made or through through the trip report. Yay, Me! All in all it looks like you had a beautiful vacation. A little Disney, and a whole lotta sightseeing in a very pretty place.

Congrats on 15 years! You've got a great perspective on what marriage is... and what it isn't. And don't give up on that promotion!

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Girl, I'd like to say 8 lbs. 2oz, 2/7 (Because it's my birthday). But it is more likely to be girl, 7 lbs, 11 oz, 1/28.

Got it! It would be cool to share the birthday, but I know for a fact Julie doesn't want to wait that long!

Finally made or through through the trip report. Yay, Me! All in all it looks like you had a beautiful vacation. A little Disney, and a whole lotta sightseeing in a very pretty place.

Wow, that was some heavy-duty reading! Thanks for wading through all of the drivel! And we still have a few more beautiful places to visit.

And if you're lucky, maybe another pupu platter joke.

Congrats on 15 years! You've got a great perspective on what marriage is... and what it isn't. And don't give up on that promotion!

Thank you! We're always still learning, aren't we? Ask me again about my perspective when this baby is born.

I'm not sweating the promotion. Mostly because I haven't had to start paying college tuition yet.

 

[Iamthequeen]

The very best bakery on the Big Island is in Na'alehu, which is near South Point. Not down the 11 mile road (which by the way, is now paved all the way). You probably drove right past it on your way to the volcano.





And here's what you missed at South Point:







Did you go down Chain of Craters Road to End of the Road? Did you ever find food? Inquiring minds want to know.....

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

The very best bakery on the Big Island is in Na'alehu, which is near South Point. Not down the 11 mile road (which by the way, is now paved all the way).

I think I had read about that bakery in the guidebook, but at that point we were on a mission to get to the park! Those donuts look pretty awesome, though.

And here's what you missed at South Point:

Aw, man! I missed a random propeller!

I do wish I'd scheduled a bit more time to explore the Big Island. You'd think I would have given more time to the biggest island.

Did you go down Chain of Craters Road to End of the Road? Did you ever find food? Inquiring minds want to know.....

We shall soon find out! Unless the baby is born before the next update.

 

[Cinderella's Fella]

We shall soon find out! Unless the baby is born before the next update.

Boy, I sure would like an update before the baby comes...

 

[GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes]

Here's the data for the previous kids:

Sarah--due 2/3, born 2/5, weight 7 lbs. 9 oz.
David--due 5/5, born 4/17, 8 lbs. 7 oz.
Scotty--due 4/30, born 4/12, 8 lbs. 4 oz.

OK… I’ll play. I won’t win, but I’ll play.

From my fractured point of view, Febuary 2nd needs saving (desperately). Something that is purely good and that I’m aware of needs to happen on that day, so it gets my nod in this little game of speculation. As for the LBs and OZs…

You know it’s improper to discuss a Ladies’ weight regardless of her age…
(unless it happens to be a boy, then it’s 8 pounds and 3)