An Inconvenient Truth: happyhaunt Style! (New... pg. 113!)

[aGoofyMom]

Mel, just had to say the bit about Calvin and the boy was beautiful...crying happy tears here at work and I read that part out loud to everyone because when I started to cry, aGoofymom jumped suddenly thinking something really bad had happened to you!! Yes, we care about ya that much!!

Calvin, you are an angel...that little boy will remember you and that moment for the rest of his life!


Keep it coming...needing the good belly laughs at work lately and your trippies are the perfect prescription!

What she said. Especially since I can't read at work right now. Cuz I have to work. Ugh.

And Mai Tai recommend the Jarlsberg cheese soup at Akershus in Norway? Very good cheese soup. On the lunch menu. Riding the Maelstrom not required.

 

[MissMagnolia]

One word of caution:

PLEASE do NOT associate grits with the U.S. entirely. That is a southern thing completely. Here in the midwest (WI) you won't find grits anywhere (Whew! ). And for all you southerners...I went to Auburn, I've tried grits and I still say YUCK!!!

 

[PaulDavid's mom]

One word of caution:

PLEASE do NOT associate grits with the U.S. entirely. That is a southern thing completely. Here in the midwest (WI) you won't find grits anywhere (Whew! ). And for all you southerners...I went to Auburn, I've tried grits and I still say YUCK!!!

I Agree. Thank goodness I'm in WI!

Then... again... there are other American foods one must avoid. In my opinion. Like: American cheese "food product", jerky, grits, Spam, peanut butter, pork rinds and fried dill pickles. And the WORST of the WORST... Chicken-Fried Steak.

I hate to say it but I LOVE jerky I am not sure why. I just do. Love it.

 

[MissMagnolia]

PaulDavid's mom - Hi neighbor! I agree on the jerky. We have a dehydrator that sits on our kitchen counter permanently so DH can cook up jerky from the spoils of deer hunting (poor Bambi ). I have half a shelf in the pantry dedicated to the differing spices you can use for the stuff.

 

[AshClan]

We continued on. Through World Showcase.

Past Italy.

Past Germany.

I stopped dead. In front of Norway.

Me: I guess we better ride Maestrom. Now.
All the other happyhaunts: NO!
Me: I HAVE to.
Mellyman: For ZZUB?
Me: Ha ha! Good one. But, seriously, for the Vikings. My Disfriends.
Mellyman: It's for ZZUB.
Calvin: ZZUB said this. ZZUB said that. ZZUB likes this. ZZUB likes that.
Me: Can it, little man. If you'd like to see the inside of Test Track. Instead of sitting around on your butt on a bench outside.
Mellyman: Touchy touchy.
Me: So... who's going? With me?
Beth: Mommy. I think you are on your own.

They left me. They took the FASTPASSES for Test Track. And left me all alone in front of Maelstrom.

I'd LIKE to say. I rode it. And loved it.

But I CAN'T.

I couldn't do it. Not yet. In the trip.

I knew this: That it would drain my will to live.

I left Norway.

With my heart light and happy. For I had NOT ventured into Maelstrom. Yet.

Maelstrom is one of the WORST rides. Ever. In the whole WDW. The whole world. Truth be told.

And... get THIS... it is a FASTPASS! Ride.

OMG!!!! Blasphemy!!! It DOESN'T MATTER how bad the ride is, baby. You still gotta do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And not just for ZZUB. Though it's very funny to "hear" your family kvetching about ZZUB (with a little jealousy, even?)! Hmmmmmm, maybe you don't HATE him as much as we've been lead to believe. As a matter of fact, I bet if he were in an accident, you wouldn't stop to get a beer. I'm just sayin'

Riding Test Track is like going to the mall. In my Mother's sweet ride.

For this reason Test Track makes me laugh. And cry. At the same time.

The only thing missing is the running over of her neighbour's small dog. Named "Biscuit" aka "Bikkies".

I swear.

Okay, sic PETA on me, but that there is funny!!! I don't care who you are!

Another great one, Mel. And that Calvin....what a sweetie!

 

[NAB]

Oh my gosh Mel you almost made me cry when you told me about Calvin and the little boy. You should tell people that Terry Fox ran across Canada to raise money for cancer. He last one of his legs when he was a teenager. He died young 20 I think. Kids and adults here do a Terry Fox run every year.

Great report your showing your heart in this installment.

 

[LaLa]

Melly Mel.

I have to tell you that I was really enjoying this installment. Hilarious stuff from a hilarious chick. The Maelstrom thing "for ZZUB" was great and the Cheez Whiz discussion was funny and thought provoking all at the same time. And then the thing about being classy for not taking off your shirt and sitting in the sun made me spew new new Diet Coke all over my screen.

But when I got to this part...

But, then, the boy looked over. And saw Calvin staring at his leg.

He looked self-conscious for a minute.

Then Calvin said, "Your leg! Your leg!"

I froze. The boy did too. He just looked at Calvin.

Then Calvin yelled, "COOL! It's like Terry Fox's!" And raised his thumbs up high in the air.

The boy paused for a second. And then this great big smile spread across his little face.

And he raised his two thumbs up like Calvin.

And we all stood in the water raining down from the Fountain of Nations.

I stood with a lump in my throat. And some wetness on my face.

Which did NOT come from the fountain.

I just sat still for a second. With a lump in my throat and a little bit of wetness on my face too. What an awesome little guy, that Calvin. Beth too. And Tommy. Your kids are definitely good people. And I know exactly where they get it from. You have reason to be very, very proud of them, Mel.

Thanks for sharing them with us.


La2

 

[Lisa_Belle]

Saw the Viking PLUTO. And decided that I would buy him. For something. I was gonna do.

But... later.

Hmm - a bit of foreshadowing here? Me(l)'s getting literary on us!

I don't eat grits either. Nor chicken fried steak. And I'm a born-and-bred South'ner.

Wow - the story about Calvin and the boy just about made me cry. It did give me a lump in my throat. Right before a staff meeting. Which I guess serves me right for DISing at work.

Well done, my favorite Hauntie!

 

[ead79]

That's where Calvin noticed the boy.

He was about the same age as Calvin. But very slight. Pale. With a brush cut of white-blond hair growing in. It seemed.

He had one leg. The other one was metal. A prosthetic leg with a running shoe on the foot of it.

Calvin looked at him for a moment. I was about to lean down and tell Calvin to please not stare.

But, then, the boy looked over. And saw Calvin staring at his leg.

He looked self-conscious for a minute.

Then Calvin said, "Your leg! Your leg!"

I froze. The boy did too. He just looked at Calvin.

Then Calvin yelled, "COOL! It's like Terry Fox's!" And raised his thumbs up high in the air.

The boy paused for a second. And then this great big smile spread across his little face.

And he raised his two thumbs up like Calvin.

And we all stood in the water raining down from the Fountain of Nations.

I stood with a lump in my throat. And some wetness on my face.

Which did NOT come from the fountain.

This is about the sweetest thing I've ever read. It sure seems that Calvin has a heart of gold. Now pardon me while I go get a tissue to wipe my eyes.

 

[Lil' Grumpy]

......calvin has wonderful insights. of,chorus...he gets it from his mother.


[ please reassure me that yor lil' manbride doesn't read?!, don't want to be
lokkin over my shoulders....of course, if he WROTE a tr, please alert me too?
now that would be some enteraining reading. just ]


yor reports are such a treat. maybe not exactly like A dripping & lickin
mickey bar, but close! see? that's > me and i'm devouring a
mickey bar..and if you look real close , you might see what left of
his tail. [ here's a tippo, tied it to my glasses, so no kid can sneak
it away from me {l}...esp. those tour groups...no! it isn't true, sticking my
mickey bars in close to their faces for cutting in front of me ]

you> me{l} [see ?, frenchie version..."?", my lil miss having the nerve
to say i don't have any culture-in me< ]...and oh,yeah...they called
him mr. Zzub-doubleb type...belongs together..or on the same trip? now
wouldn't that make a cute lil trip report? [ except maybe it would half to
have a higher rating...profanity& such. so your fessing about being @
malley-stormer [sp.-ok?-i'mnot prefect ,u know!]....and ""chose"" not to
ride???? tell me {l}...that's isn't true! i truly broken!

' a muck! shucks, u too?

 

[patrokls]

Oh come on. Maelstrom isn't that bad. It has trolls and oil platforms. Its a little like the internet that way.
Cheez Whiz is called Cheez Whiz for legal reasons. As in it can't legally be called cheese for there is no cheese in it, and the whiz comes from: gee whiz I can't believe I just ate cheez.

 

[BratTink]

Philly checking in to comment on the cheesesteak. WS can't have a cheesesteak in their restaurant because you can't get a good one outside of Phila. Its all about the roll, see; and you can apparently only make our rolls with our water. A little scary, actually.
Now cheese whiz is not cheese it is "cheese product" whatever that is and NOT good on cheesesteaks.

Great TR Mel, keep it coming!

 

[kathymc]

awww - that was a sweet ending.

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

I just want to tell you all something about Calvin. He's an intense kid. And he gets obsessive about things.

He's currently obsessed with The Titanic, The Bermuda Triangle and Terry Fox.

Not surprisingly... we're crossing THE DISNEY CRUISE off of our vacation plans. For a while.

Anywho... the Terry Fox thing. Has been ongoing for a least two years. Now. Thanks to me. I got him interested in it. I remember Terry running through Ontario when I was growing up. Watching it on the news. Every night. Cheering him on. I remember when he had to stop running because his cancer had come back. In his lungs. He stopped just outside of Thunder Bay. And I remember crying with my Dad when we heard he had passed away the summer of 1981.

I read to the kids about him. We watched The Terry Fox Story. We had to dub it, illegally from the library copy, because Calvin watches it so much.

I also lost a childhood friend to brain cancer when we were both fourteen years old. And my father to lung cancer later on.

We fully participate in the Terry Fox Run. My General canvasses for the Canadian Cancer Society. Every year.

Anywho... Calvin is OBSESSED with Terry Fox. Both years (Grades 1 and 2) that he has participated in his school's Terry Fox Run he has done the whole thing with a "hop-step-jump". In his stride. Like Terry ran. He has given his entire piggy bank over as his donation. Each year.

He claims he wants to finish Terry's run when he is 18 years old. He figures the rest of us will come along. Drive a camper trailer behind him. And all that.

We're taking him to Thunder Bay, either this summer or next, when we can fit it in our vacation planning. He wants to see the spot on the highway where Terry stopped running. It is marked with a plaque.

He's a pretty good kid. I gotta say. He DOES get that from his father.

Still... he's a really naughty kid, too. Not sure where he gets THAT from.

That reminds me... I've got to go outside and haul his little butt in here. And ground him. For something or other. That he's done.

I'm sure I owe him.

Later, Mel.

 

[Lisa_Belle]

Philly checking in to comment on the cheesesteak. WS can't have a cheesesteak in their restaurant because you can't get a good one outside of Phila. Its all about the roll, see; and you can apparently only make our rolls with our water. A little scary, actually.
Now cheese whiz is not cheese it is "cheese product" whatever that is and NOT good on cheesesteaks.

Great TR Mel, keep it coming!

I've had the Philly water, and this does shed a new light on the situation. Let me put it this way - IMO even their Cokes are bad. Because apprently the local bottling company uses the local water. But is it worse than Disney water? (Does this need a poll?)

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

A poll might be a good idea.

Let's vote for the cheez product that should be served on top of Philly Cheesesteaks.

I'm a 100% Whiz Girl.

I'm just joking.

About the poll part.

That would be way too Off Topic.

Let's talk some more about Terry Fox.

Heh heh.

Mel.

 

[HaleyB]

Well I know Mr. Silly reads this thread.
But I see he never replies to Mel.
I think he is afraid.

But I am very surprised he did not respond to the Quebec bashing in your post.

 

[ZZUB]

Me: I guess we better ride Maestrom. Now.
All the other happyhaunts: NO!
Me: I HAVE to.
Mellyman: For ZZUB?
Me: Ha ha! Good one. But, seriously, for the Vikings. My Disfriends.

Where to begin? You don't ride Maelstrom for ZZUB; you AVOID Maelstrom for ZZUB! Duh.

I don't know what to make of this exchange:

Mellyman: It's for ZZUB.
Calvin: ZZUB said this. ZZUB said that. ZZUB likes this. ZZUB likes that.

I'm either flattered or freaked out or some combination of the two, maybe fleaked? or frattered?

I think my favorite screename summed it up best with this:

It DOESN'T MATTER how bad the ride is, baby. You still gotta do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And not just for ZZUB. Though it's very funny to "hear" your family kvetching about ZZUB (with a little jealousy, even?)! Hmmmmmm, maybe you don't HATE him as much as we've been lead to believe. As a matter of fact, I bet if he were in an accident, you wouldn't stop to get a beer. I'm just sayin'.

What's a nice goy like Ashclan doing bringing the Yiddish? And she dropped in an obscure WW reference to boot. For clarification, I do believe if I was in an accident Mel would stop off for Ju Ju fruits.

In any event, the thing with Calvin. One of the great joys of parenthood, from my perspective, is when you see your kids do something right. Good. Decent. Props to you and Mel, Mel.

You realize I'm referring to Calvin, "ZZUB said this. ZZUB said that," and not the kid with the leg thing. But you knew that, right?

for my man Calvin.

 

[kathyg]

I don't usually (actually never) reply to Mel's posts. But I find this time I must in order to defend the name of my good city and it's epicurious invention, the cheesesteak. The only cheesesteak that is real is made in Philly and, yes, it is because of the rolls. It is also because of the cheese whiz, which is pastuerized processed orange cheese sauce (which means notihing real included). You order a cheesesteak only by saying either "whiz wit" (that means with onions) or whiz widout (philly speak for without onions). The soup nazi has nothing on us. There are some places that serve steaks with provolone or american or (heaven forbid) cheddar, but we don't consider those real cheesesteaks.

Now, to keep this on topic, everyone picture Calvin eating his Cherry Kaki Gori or Mel eating her Rainbow Kaki Gori, topless, of course. The test of how good a cheesesteak really is is how much you can get dribbling down your chin and onto your shirt, pants, shoes, neighbors, etc. The 3 inch by 5 inch napkins which accompany the cheesesteaks are also traditional. I think its because all the regulars (who, of course, bring their own tablecloths to wipe up the mess) get a kick out of watching all the newbies on dates trying to look cool and sophisticated while covered with greasy, slimy, orangy goop and trying to clean it up with 500 greasy, wadded up pieces of napkins.

Oh, and don't forget the coke (or pepsi). Oh, I forget which one is which, but I adore you both!!

 

[offwegotoneverland]

Mel,

I forgot to ask did Calvin get ahold of the Terry Fox loonie when it came out? My DS drove me bonkers till I brought one home.

By the way in march of 2005 (before that years run) it had raised 360 million far suprassing Terry's inital goal of raising 22 million or one dollar for every Canadian.

What is with you though and the faux cheese stuff today...do you not like cows?