AmyT's Journal (Comments Definitely Welcome!)

I am getting frustrated again. BFL is obviously not working for me like I wanted it to. I am still at 137. :guilty: I am getting to the point where I just want to GIVE UP because no matter what I do, how much I exercise, or what I eat, I can't seem to get below 134-135. I mean, I have been trying to lose weight since JULY!!!!!!! :furious: I am sick of worrying about what I eat, sick of being obsessed with food and sick of not being happy with my body. :sad: I haven't been doing the BFL weight routine, but I have been lifting weights for 30 minutes at least 3x a week for months, and doing cardio at least 3x a week as well. And yes, I have firmed up, but there is still a long way to go. I don't know if it's because I am getting older or what, but I am really upset about things right now... :sad2:

My friend started BFL yesterday and she wants me to be her buddy, but right now I am really lacking motivation. I have all my BFL meals planned out for the day, hopefully I will be in a better mood later on. :confused3 I guess I am just ticked off that I am not where I wanted to be for my cruise. Yesterday I drank 100oz of water, 2 cups green tea and a DC:

6:15am: Egg Beaters; Oatmeal
8:30am: Balance Bar
11:00am (@class): Turkey-n-Provolone w/Mustard on Wheat; Carrots; 2 Bit-o-Honey
2:30pm: FF Cottage Cheese; Apple; 2 Caramels
6:30pm: Chicken; Wheat Spaghetti; Jicama
9:00pm: FF Cottage Cheese; FF Yogurt; Apple Jacks (1/2c)
WORKOUT: Walking (40min); Weights (30min); Elliptical (30min)
RESISTED: Cheetos and Cookies at class; Chocolate
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Jane, I definitely eat more when I drink, and I think the alcohol makes me retain a bunch of water too. I have been trying to cut way back as well. I had a record 12 day period, it finally stopped. And I am on the pill! I can't wait to get my procedure done, maybe that will help with some of my constant water retention too...

Beth, thanks, but I am definitely not doing great! I need to get refocused and lose the bad attitude... :rolleyes:
 
I understand the frustration of not losing the way you want to. Been there way to many times when I have stayed exactly the same for three or four months and then lost about .2 and then stay the same etc....It's really hard to get over and to not give up but know that you are doing the right thing for your body with the healthy eating, and the workouts (regardless of what plan you are following)
 
Happy Valentines Day! I hope today gets better for you. Its been a rough month. I don't blame you for being upset. Could the pill be part of the problem? I was on one brand once & had problems. When I switched brands my problems went away. I just hope that once you have your procedure that you start feeling better. Once your health problems get squared away it may be easier to deal with the weightloss issues.

I wish you could have watched Oprah last week. She had on women who had all lost weight but were stuck with the last 5 to 25 pounds. No matter what they did they couldn't seem to get rid of it. Of course, she had Guru Bob to help them tweak their programs. Hopefully, they'll be back on with their success stories. When that happens, I'll let you know what they did. Just remember you're not alone!!
 

I am still at 137. :confused3 I am feeling better about things, but still kinda frustrated with the scale. I am going to stick with BFL (but not during my cruise :rolleyes: ). DH got me Body for Life for Women and Eating for Life (don’t worry, I asked for them :teeth: ) and there was a sub-chapter in BFLW that really hit home. It was called “Strive for Progress, not Perfection”. :thumbsup2 I think the most important thing for me is to learn to be happy with my body. I am healthy, not overweight according to any charts, and I think I look better to others than I look to myself. I just need to start believing that wholeheartedly. I had a much needed break from heavy exercise (my hamstrings were killing me) but I still got my walk in. DS, who rarely shares anything, gave me 3 M&M’s because I didn’t have a Valentine’s party at work. And of course DD also gave me 3, plus one-upped him with a Starburst. Other than that, I was 100%. I had a little piece of chocolate in my hand more times than I care to admit, but I put it down and walked away every time! :cheer2: I drank my 100oz of water; 2 cups green tea; Minute Maid Light; a DC:

6:15am: Egg Beaters; Oatmeal
8:40am: Balance Bar
11:45am: Chicken; Brown Rice; Jicama
2:30pm: Egg Whites (4); Apple
6:30pm: Beef Roast; Red Potato; Carrots; 6 M&M’s; 1 Starburst
8:20pm: FF Cottage Cheese; FF Yogurt
WORKOUT: Walking (40min)
RESISTED: Candy from boss’s candy jar; Chocolate
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Jane, you might be on to something with the pill. I was at 128 for years and right when I started the pill is when the weight creep started... I am getting my tubes tied when I get the endometrial ablation, so maybe that will help! Thanks for the pep talk, I really needed it. I plan on reading BFLW this weekend (no kids and DH is golfing on Sat) and I bet that will motivate me all over again!

Beth, thanks for sharing. I know I am not the only one in this situation, but sometimes it sure feels like it! The most important thing is that I am working out consistently and I know I am in the best shape I've ever been in, and that matters more than what that stupid scale says! ::yes::
 
Hi Amy,

I am so sorry that the scale is not moving for you. I share your frustrations....I can't seem to get the scale to move either......It will though....just have to think positive. I know at times it is hard. I keep thinking that if it does not move soon, I am giving up, but then I would be giving up everything that I have accomplished. Same thing for you......

Keep your head up, things will get better....

Happy Hump Day!
 
The fact that you feel that you are in the best shape of your life says alot about your progress. Way to go!! :cheer2: Also, that you can even THINK about trying on a bikini, let alone wearing one, is awesome. Since you didn't have those extra few pounds before you went on the pill maybe those 5lbs will melt off after you get off of it. I'm glad you'll have some down time to yourself for reading & getting remotivated this weekend. You're so busy you may just need some R&R.
 
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I was at 135 this morning… I did really good yesterday although I had 2 caramels after lunch - but that was because there was a chocolate cream pie in the breakroom just calling my name. I figured 2 candies were WAY better than a piece of that pie! I can’t wait to read my books this weekend and I am definitely going to try some of the recipes next week. There is a page in the BFLW book that has a big sign you can print out – it says STOP, THE ANSWER IS NOT IN HERE and you are supposed to put it on your fridge, pantry, wherever you are always looking for naughty snacks. I wonder if my boss would notice if I put one in his candy jar… I drank 100oz of water; 2 cups of green tea; a Minute Maid Light and a DC:

6:15am: Egg Beaters; Oatmeal
8:30am: Zone Bar
11:45am: Beef Roast; Red Potato; Carrots; 2 Caramels
2:30pm: FF Cottage Cheese; Apple
6:30pm: Lemon Pepper Chicken; Sweet Potato w/Cinnamon; Broccoli
8:30pm: FF Cottage Cheese; FF Yogurt
WORKOUT: Walking (40min); Weights (30min); Treadmill (30min)
RESISTED: Chocolate Cream Pie (in breakroom); More Candy from Boss’s Jar; Valentine candies (I think all of the stuff the kids brought home will mysteriously disappear into the trash while they are at their dad’s this weekend…)
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Jamie, you are way more patient than I am! But you are also right, I need to stop focusing so much on the scale and more on measurements.

Jane, thanks for the pep talk! I know things aren't as bad as I think they are, I just get so irritated sometimes! Thanks for understanding and helping me get out of my funk! :goodvibes
 
Hi Amy,

Seems like I've been away forever, but just a few weeks, I've been busy, and got a new computer (was without the internet for a few days :eek: )

You can do this! I know when I originally lost my majority of weight (50 lbs) it did take me forever to lose those last 5 - 10 lbs. I'd go up and down and finally, it happened.

Now where I am is that I was maintaining, then went up a bit last summer, and up a bit at the holidays, and now I'm 10 lbs over where I want to be, so I understand. I have these same stupid 10 lbs to lose all over again, and it is hard.

I agree that the pill can mess with the body and keep the weight on. That worked that way for me many years ago.

Don't give up. Maybe you just need to shake things up a bit? Eat some different foods than usual or do a different workout routine?

Keep on, you can do this. And you've been great encouraging me and others.

pixiedust: Good luck. :sunny:
 
You just reminded me to dig out that heavy pic of myself. After reading your post about the BFL stop sign, I knew I needed my own personal stop sign. I grabbed a bad pic of myself and put it out in the kitchen. Now if that doesn't motivate me nothing will.

As for the boss' candy jar, I dare ya!!!!

Have a great weekend & watch out for those hidden calories!!!!
 
Hi Amy!!!!

Yippie!!! You are down to 135. That is great!!!!

You are doing a great job! Keep up the great work.

I agree, those two candies were way better than that piece of cake. Congrats on reisisiting it. You can do this!!!!

Happy Friday, I have been waiting for this day all week long!!!!
 
I did not have the best night last night – extremely snacky! :guilty: Not one particular thing, just 5 Goldfish here, a handful of almonds there (the bag is now gone, thankfully), a couple Hershey Kisses here.... I am at 136, and I am OK with that. I totally understand why it went up… :rolleyes: I think this weekend I am going to take a bunch of measurements (arms, legs, waist, hips). I know my arms are more defined and less flabby, my butt has gotten smaller and my legs don’t jiggle as much as they used to. Progress has definitely been made. :thumbsup2 And so what if I don’t look perfect in my bikini – not many women do! It’s a Medium, so I am assuming that means I am “average” size. I already told DH to remind me when we get on the ship/beach that no one besides me is paying any attention to what I look like in my swimsuit. I wish there were some kind of magic “body image” pill I could take… Hopefully my little pep talks to myself will eventually sink in! I didn’t even get to the gym - I had to work late. But instead of going to Outback tonight, like we usually do, I am going to go to the gym and make a regular, healthy dinner! :cheer2: That is my promise to myself. I drank 100oz of water; 2 cups of green tea and a DC:

6:15am: Egg Beaters; Oatmeal
8:30am: Balance Bar
11:45am: Chicken; Brown Rice; Broccoli; 1 Tootsie Roll midgie; 1 Caramel
2:30pm: Egg Whites (4); Apple
6:30pm: Ground Turkey; Wheat Tortilla; Carrots; Little Junk Items
8:30pm: FF Cottage Cheese; FF Yogurt
WORKOUT: Walking (40min)
RESISTED: Nothing – one of those days…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kate, thanks so much for the encouragement. Everyone always says it is hardest to lose the last 10lbs. What if it is the ONLY 10lbs? For me, it seems like an impossibility! I am going to try to focus more on measurements, etc. I also need to find some way to counteract my unhealthy obsession with food (I do have obsessive-compulsive tendencies and now it seems to be focused on food/weight :worried: ) I'll keep chugging along! :cheer2:

Jane, my house is going to be plastered with STOP signs. I need to have it tatooed on the back of my hands too... I hope your picture works for you. The BFLW book seems to have a lot of the emotional games we women play addressed in it, I can't wait to read it this weekend! :hyper:

Jamie, I'd like Fridays a lot better if they didn't start off with an insanely boring staff meeting... :crazy2: Thanks for always being there to support me!
 
I was 136 again this morning (the scale did the notorious 135 then flip to 136 at the last second bit again - several times in a row). No Outback last night! No going out to happy hour with our friends at the Monastery! I did not make it to the gym (once I get home, it is pretty much impossible to get back out to the gym), but I did do my Pilates Sculpt DVD! Then I made the EFL recipe Shrimp Scampi w/Wheat Noodles and we headed off to Hi Health and Target to get some stuff. We did stop at Baskin Robbins and I got a single scoop of "Happy Camper" ice cream in a cup. I counted that as my last meal (not quite as healthy as FF cottage cheese and yogurt, but oh well!). I drank 90oz of water; 2 cups green tea, 1 glass of white wine and a DC:

6:15am: Egg Beaters; Oatmeal
8:45am: Balance Bar
12:00pm: Chicken; Wheat Noodles; Carrots
2:30pm: FF Cottage Cheese; Apple
6:30pm: Shrimp; Wheat Noodles; Zucchini; 2 Mini Hershey bars :confused3
8:30pm: Ice Cream
WORKOUT: Walking (40min); Pilates Sculpt DVD (55min)
RESISTED: Candy from boss's jar :cheer2: ; More chocolate; Cone w/ice cream
 
Here we are in the middle of another weekend. I find that the unexpected temptations are the worst. Like today at work they had a bakery cake for the employees. I'm not thinking ahead like I used to. You're right about gaining control of our eating for the remainder of the 12 weeks.

How was the shrimp scampi? It sounds delicious. And what in the heck is Happy Camper Ice Cream? We used to have a Baskin Robbins here but it was replaced by an Edies. I miss their chocolate fudge ice cream. Have a great weekend and enjoy you free day!
 
Yesterday I went to a Cardio Kickboxing class that cardio kicked my butt! :rotfl: I am very sore today, but I can't wait to go back next week. :goodvibes I was very intimidated when I went in there because I was the biggest person in there (yes, at 136lbs). All the others were in their 20's and weighed 110lbs dripping wet. And did I mention their legs stopped where my neck begins? :rolleyes: Anyway, I was so proud of myself because I was able to keep up with ALL the abs and I could do ALL the pushups (real ones, not on my knees). The Skinny Minnies were struggling and taking breaks! Needless to say, my eating wasn't great, but it could have been worse. I got some things at Trader Joe's (High Fiber O's cereal, wheat tortilla chips, individually packaged bags of almonds). When I was there I found some Blueberry Fiber Cakes that are only 80 calories, 1.5g of fat and 13g of fiber in each one! I ate 2 of those for my snack yesterday - they were actually good! I'll have to stock up on those everytime I make the trip to TJ's. I went out to eat for lunch AND dinner yesterday... :confused3 I am debating on whether or not to call that my free day and behave today. We'll see how the day goes. I did drink 120oz of water and a peach margarita:

7:30am: Chocolate Oatmeal (yum)
10:00am: Kashi Crunch; FF Yogurt
1:00pm (@ Phoenicia): Chicken Schwarma Whole Wheat Pita Wrap; Whole Wheat Pita w/Hummus
3:00pm: Blueberry FIber Cakes (2)
6:30pm (@ Serranos): Chips-n-Salsa; Chicken Machaca; Spanish Rice (1/4c or less); 2 Mini Hershey bars
WORKOUT: Cardio Kickboxing (60min)
RESISTED: Another Margarita; More chocolate
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Jane, Happy Camper ice cream was not that great. It was vanilla ice cream with a peanut butter swirl and banana chips, raisins and chocolate covered peanuts. The taster she gave me had some pb and a nut, so of course I jumped all over it, only to be gagged when I bit into the first banana chip... :crazy2:

The Scampi was pretty good. I'll give you the recipe if you want (you might want to get the EFL book or borrow it from the library to jot down some recipes - it's worth it). I am all fired up to make these next couple weeks before my cruise my best BFL days yet! WE CAN DO IT! :cheer2:
 
Hey Amy - congrats on how you did at the kickboxing class!

I love shrimp scampi - heck I love shrimp ANYTHING!

Have a good weekend! :sunny:
 
I am SO excited! I thought it was going to be TOM during my cruise, but I just double checked and I had miscalculated - TOM will be the week BEFORE my cruise!!! :cool1: :banana: :Pinkbounc :cheer2: :thumbsup2 :woohoo:

I did not do good at all yesterday - another free weekend. I also forgot to take my measurements, I need to have DH help me with that tonight. Today is the start of my "no excuses to not stick with BFL eating" pre-cruise crunch. I'm going to nail it! :cheer2: I did drink 100oz of water, about 1/3 of a DC, 24oz NF Chai Latte and 1 glass of white wine:

7:15am: TJ's Organic High Fiber O's w/Skim Milk
10:45am: Kashi Crunch; FF Yogurt; Blueberry Fiber Cake
1:45pm: Wheat Tortilla Chips; Chili-n-Cheese Dip; Mini Hershey Bar
5:30pm: Pecan Halves (15); Celery-n-PB
6:30pm: Lemon Pepper Tilapia; Dirty Rice; Cauliflower; Frosting Graham Sandwich
8:30pm: Root Beer Float
WORKOUT: None
RESISTED: Pop Tarts; Cheetos; Almonds (at least the almonds are now in single serving baggies!)
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Kate, Thanks! Do you have the Eating for Life cookbook? I like it so far. I am trying 2 more recipes out of it for dinner this week. ::yes::
 
WTG!! And you are so close on your February excercise goal YEAH!!!

Which recipes are you trying this week?
 
Congrats on that kickboxing class!!!! :dancer: Sounds like you nailed it! Real pushups are a big deal. I can only do 8-10 of the sissy ones. Pretty soon you'll be one of the skinnies in that class. You're on your way with your BFL eating precruise crunch! I'll check my library for the EFL book. They had the BFL book and tapes so they probably have the recipes too. We can do this!!!!
 
I did great yesterday. :cool1: I absolutely DID NOT want to go to the gym, but I forced myself to go anyway. I had a real lack of energy for some reason, but I’m glad I toughed it out. I tried some Jedi mind tricks (actually I used some techniques from the BFLW book) and whenever I wanted to nibble, or was trying to talk myself out of working out, I reminded myself how much I want to prove that I can stick to something and not fail. And if that didn’t immediately snap me out of it, I reminded myself that I want to look great in my bikini, not just settle for a one-piece. It seems to have worked, at least for last night… :teeth: I am going to stop posting my weight until I hit some major milestones (I am currently at 136). The ones that I hope to reach soon are 133 (at which point I will finally get a 5lb clippie) and 129 (which will finally get me out of the 130’s). I drank 100oz of water, 2 cups green tea, 20oz AZ NoCarb Blueberry Green Tea and a DC:

6:00am: Egg Beaters w/FF Cheddar; Oatmeal
8:30am: Egg Whites (4); Blueberry Fiber Cake
11:45am: Chicken; Sweet Potato; Cauliflower
2:45pm: FF Cottage Cheese; Apple
6:45pm: Leftover Lemon Pepper Tilapia; Dirty Rice; Cauliflower; Pecan Halves (1/2c)
8:30pm: FF Cottage Cheese; FF Yogurt
WORKOUT: Walking (40min); Weights (30min); Elliptical (30min)
RESISTED: Boss’s candy jar; Cereal
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Beth, I am going to try the Goulash and Deluxe Turkey Dinner this week. Have you tried either one of these? I'm trying to pick things the kids will actually eat without complaining... :rolleyes:

Jane, so far so good this week! I ate more pecans than I probably should have, but I'm not worried about it. The main thing is that I worked out and didn't snack! :cheer2: Were you able to get the EFL book at the library?
 

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