Thanks Tracy and Diane!
Where has this week gone? We had out of town company for one thing and I had a dinner party last night. I did well on Thursday, this was my mom's best friend here from AZ., and it was really good to see her. And really weird to not have my mom here as well. I hadn't seen her since last September, she also has cancer and had a rough winter and spring. But she made it and while she looked very thin and tired, she seems to be on the rebound. I made a healthy dinner and did just fine. Yesterday's dinner, not so good! Too many rum and diets, salty foods and I had a large piece of buttermilk pie! I made that because none of my Colorado friends knew what the heck I was talking about when I mentioned it recently. They became instant converts! Whats not to love about a pie that has a bunch of sugar, buttermilk, eggs and butter in the filling?
Today I have felt blah, yucky and bloated. And I haven't ate that well. All leftovers will be eaten or tossed by tonight. I am beat, it was a hectic week and I have no energy. I did manage to walk two days this week and did weights another day. So I was pleased with that. I also cleaned the house from top to bottom, did some painting and rearranged some furniture. So that was some activity as well. I also really limited my tv, for some reason this summer I have watched more tv than I normally do.
I have decided not to do August exercise challenge. I did 800 minutes of exercise in July and didn't lose but one pound. Not very good. I really, really, REALLY need to focus on food. So I have decided to set a different challenge. Beginning tomorrow, we have 73 days before we leave for WDW. So I will set my own little food challenge. In this upcoming 73 days, I am going to shoot for 65 days of on target eating. That leaves me roughly one day a week to have a cocktail if I want one or a dessert or eat out. The other six days a week, I will be disciplined, eat within points, journal every bite I take and have nothing but water or tea to drink ( I plan to eliminate diet soda as much as possible as well). I really need to discipline myself with food. I always go back to what my trainer (way back in 2002) told me. Food is over 70% of the weight loss equation. Given my poor eating habits, I cannot exercise my way to being thin and healthy. Since I seem to be unable to do both components successfully, I feel its wiser to focus on the bigger issue. I didn't get to this weight by being a couch potato. Because in all I consider myself a pretty active person. Its rare for me to log less than 7000 steps on my pedometer, even on days I don't "walk". I got to this weight by being a binge eater. So I need to tackle that. I do intend to exercise at a minimum of 3 times a week but I'm not going to set firm goals for that right now. One thing at a time for the next 10 weeks. If I am successful then I will know I am on the right path. If not, then I know I am not! But in the past when I did this, it worked. This was how I lost 25 pounds in five months back in 2006. Focusing on food. I just need to stick to it this time.
On that same wavelength, I cancelled all but three ADR's for October. No need to spend so much money (why is WDW so expensive on their sub par meals I must ask) and time eating. I want the emphasis to be on time with family and fun. I swear in June on that dining plan, all we did is eat and travel to the next meal. And I haven't gotten on track since for more than a few days here and there. I just feel like it is a telling and sad facet of my overall life that my Disney trips have evolved into food fests like everything else in my life. I told dh he can pick where we eat each day, I need to distance myself from worrying, obsessing and controlling all the food choices of our family. I mean you wouldn't put a drug addict in charge of the medicine cabinet right?
I also got out some books that I have in the past found helpful. The book Pearlie recommended that I started but then never finished, a Bob Greene book and Dr Phil's book. I want to re read what helped in the past and finish the other book. I find them all helpful with getting to the emotional issues. I also plan to start back regularly with WW. I signed up for the online monthly pass today, and backed out of something on Wednesday morning I didn't want to go to anyway. Again, I need to focus on this and make it my top priority. Which as we all know, I have done before! This time I just need to stay on track.
I got an email from a good friend who had a lap band operation this week. I am happy for her, she's always been very overweight (more so than me poor thing) and has diabetes. I am really hoping this works for her. I am sure her insurance paid for it given her health history. Since I don't have any health issues (yet) related to my weight, and I don't have the thousands of dollars to invest in that, I need to do this the old fashioned way.
Last night was like probably a thousand other nights of my life. Me being very funny, a good hostess and feeling like total crap inside as I sat there a good 80 pounds heavier than the women and probably 40 pounds heavier than the heaviest of the men. 8 adults, including a couple guys over 6 feet and me the only fat person in the bunch. Denver just happens to be the leanest city in the U.S., and boy it sure felt that way last night at my house. I had a great time but of course that black cloud hung over me all night. And is probably why I drank more than usual. I had a nice outfit on, a good hair day and I looked like a dowdy, fat person. Not exactly what I wanted to be when I grew up. Ahh, big sigh. but then again, I feel very motivated and very helpful. They say you have to hit rock bottom, I hope this is it for me. Not only because I am ready to succeed but because I can't imagine feeling worse!
I will vist journals either later tonight after church or tomorrow.
Cinnamon Toast Crunch, I'm glad you found something sweet that wasn't as damaging to get rid of that craving. 
I'm so glad that it made you happy!
but I just can't justify Disney's prices. I am thrilled we took our 7 day Eastern Caribbean in 2006 but the cost of doing that again is prohibitive. And I want to try a different itinerary and the one week we can go offseason, during the kids fall break, is Eastern. So I found a 
