Alternative to baby "leash"

[BYC]

Call it a "tether" and remind him that NASA tethers astronauts to the Space Station when they're outside working.

It's because they love their astronauts and don't want to see them drift away...

 

[Suellen]

My question is for those who are vehemently against them and say consistency and consequence are the solution. I've seen PPs ask this too but I haven't seen an answer. If someone has answered it, I apologize.

Do you have locks on your cabinets to keep your toddler away from the chemicals under the sink? How about a baby gate at the top/bottom of your stairs? How about a fence around your pool?

If so why aren't these things considered "lazy" parenting. As you've stated consistency and consequence are the solution. Using your argument all an engaged parent would need to do is instruct their children to stay away from said cabinets/stairs/pools and do so consistently on order to keep their child safe.

I'll answer this but I'll also add that I am not vehemently against them in general... just for MY kids.

We never baby proofed the house. We all piled in the car and headed out to buy them. We stood in the aisles at Babies R Us trying to decide what we needed and began piling things in the cart for our house.... then I decided she (at the time there was only one) spent a lot of time at my moms. So we needed duplicates for her house. But wait. What about his parents where they go occasionally? Or my grandmothers where the also go often? How about my dad's house they go there a lot too. Hmmmm..... this was getting complicated.

So we put it all back and spent tireless time telling them what NOT to touch. Because in real life there are no baby latches on everything.

Was it easy? NO! Was it a total PITA? Yes! Did I say the same thing 500 times and have to keep an eye on the one year old every second? YES! Did she climb to the top of our stairs once? YES?

She only got memorable hurt twice that I can remember. Once she got her fingers under our heavy television and once she jumped so high throwing a fit in her crib that she smacked her head on something and still has a small lump I can feel on her forehead.

I can say they did have some kind of leashes in the mid seventies.

 

[JACH1976]

-

 

[FosterA]

My question is for those who are vehemently against them and say consistency and consequence are the solution. I've seen PPs ask this too but I haven't seen an answer. If someone has answered it, I apologize.

Do you have locks on your cabinets to keep your toddler away from the chemicals under the sink? How about a baby gate at the top/bottom of your stairs? How about a fence around your pool?

If so why aren't these things considered "lazy" parenting. As you've stated consistency and consequence are the solution. Using your argument all an engaged parent would need to do is instruct their children to stay away from said cabinets/stairs/pools and do so consistently on order to keep their child safe.

Now, I'm not arguing that consistency and consequence are not key concepts when working with children in any capacity. However, it often takes more than a few times in order for the child to "get it" especially at a young age. Why is it so wrong to use a back up method, like a leash/reigns/tether until they understand like you would a cabinet lock, gate or fence?

You know, I've tried to ask similar questions several times with different examples on this thread and they get shot down as being "apples to oranges" I have no idea why putting a fence around a pool would be good parenting yet attaching your child to a leash while in a crowded area is "lazy" (in case they haven't mastered walking like an adult yet)?? if you ask me, all these things are extra safety measures to help the parent have peace of mind. Once again....since these examples are clearly not "apples to oranges" and rather "apples to apples" than I stand by my theory that people are just hung up on leashes because they "look" like dog leashes and that just freaks them all out. They DO look like dog leashes but who cares!

I'm sure there's one or two posters here (not going to name any names) that think I'm sticking up for the "leashers" because I'm a lazy parent and take vacations from parenting when on vacation. No...i'm just realistic and am trying to get the point across that it's really ok to snap a leash on your kid while at a mega crowded park if it helps you relax a little and be able to enjoy yourself versus having to hold a sweaty hand all day. If there is a product out there that DOESN'T HURT THE CHILD, DOESN'T DISRUPT OTHER GUESTS, and MAKES YOUR LIFE A LITTLE EASIER than why be so ashamed to use it? It's almost like the anti-leashers want to do things the harder way to earn some sort of parenting badge. It really is quite odd There's a million apparatuses sold at Baby'sRus that help provide safety and PEACE OF MIND TO "LAZY PARENTS" such lifejackets, safety locks, baby gates, baby monitors, child proof medicine bottles.....oh and just send your toddler out the front door to ride their tricycle while you watch tv because "if they were disciplined they wouldn't be running out in the street". And if you were truly good at discipline you would have no need to put your meds up high and out of the way because your kid KNOWS BETTER than to get into them because you are a "consistent disciplinarian" puuuuleeeze!

ok, I'm getting kind of tired of this thread and it's really quite petty anyway. My kids are 12 and 15 so it really doesn't apply to me. I've never used a leash and I actually never even needed baby gates or child locks either. Not because I rock at being good with discipline but because my kids were timid and clingy and sort of little "sissies". BUT....I would never judge and jump to the conclusion that a parent is lazy for using a leash. I would see one and think "ah, clever idea, kid seems happier than being tied into stroller and mom and dad can chat and be adults since they have peace of mind". I'd also think to myself, "glad my kids aren't the kind to run off since they are so clingy but not everybody has clingy scaredy-cat kids so I totally get it". I mean do you really think they tie this kid up at home and walk him around their neighborhood on a leash?! (and if you do, you'd be on youtube) of course not, they probably just whipped it out at WDW because the place is freakin' crowded. duh. Said parents might actually want to be able to "relax" just a bit on vacation and probably have every intention on getting back to working on discipling the kid to walk in crowded places once they get back home and they are not in such an overwhelming venue.

 

[FosterA]

I'm going to pipe up one final time before this toxic thread gets closed down. We've established that leashes are just a safety device to give a parent peace of mind (no different than pool fences, child proof locks, etc etc) and yet people are still disgusted by them.

I am 100% sure i know why. Because there are so many neglectful and abusive parents out there, when somebody sees a kid on a leash they jump to the conclusion that this kid is probably chained up at home and put in a cage and forced to eat dog food with hot sauce on it. It's human nature to think that seeing a "leash" looking -apparatus on a kid makes people uncomfortable and they they can't shake the stigma. Because they can't logically explain how a leash is so much worse than a pool gate or child locks, then they throw out the"that's lazy parenting card".

Same goes for why you don't see alot of people out there using them...not that a zillion parents don't deep-down want to use one. They don't because they are afraid of being judged and having people think they abuse their kid. you know as well as I, that if you didn't think you'd be judged and laughed at, you'd run out and buy one too.

 

[Suellen]

I'm going to pipe up one final time before this toxic thread gets closed down. We've established that leashes are just a safety device to give a parent peace of mind (no different than pool fences, child proof locks, etc etc) and yet people are still disgusted by them.

I am 100% sure i know why. Because there are so many neglectful and abusive parents out there, when somebody sees a kid on a leash they jump to the conclusion that this kid is probably chained up at home and put in a cage and forced to eat dog food with hot sauce on it. It's human nature to think that seeing a "leash" looking -apparatus on a kid makes people uncomfortable and they they can't shake the stigma. Because they can't logically explain how a leash is so much worse than a pool gate or child locks, then they throw out the"that's lazy parenting card".

Same goes for why you don't see alot of people out there using them...not that a zillion parents don't deep-down want to use one. They don't because they are afraid of being judged and having people think they abuse their kid. you know as well as I, that if you didn't think you'd be judged and laughed at, you'd run out and buy one too.

This doesn't describe anything about me. That is not why I wouldn't put a leash on my kid and I have no deep desire to run out and buy one if I knew I wouldn't be judged ~ honestly being judged is a simple fact of life. People are in general judgmental. I do my best not to judge others because I have no idea what is going on beyond the surface glimpse I get.

I personally don't think it is possible to be a caring parent and be lazy. Parenting is a lot of work.

All those that talk of holding your arm up in the air and how uncomfortable that would be.... I was thinking about that while walking with my 44 inch tall dd in a parking lot yesterday and holding her hand.... she wasn't even CLOSE to lifting her hand up to meet mine.... never mind stretched above her head. I know I am short and they are tall... but really? Stretched above their head??? How tall are you people? Plus ~ ALL day? I don't hold my kids hand ALL day. I hold it where it is crowded and it would/could be a danger for her to run off. I don't hold it while we are on rides, in the car, standing in line, playing at the play spots. I mean really... it isn't like 12 hours of hand holding.

Of course my kids are now older too and know that running off is unacceptable behavior... I do still hold their hands in parking lots, near deep water... i.e. walking on the pier because honestly even at 7 and 5 they can easily spy something shiny and dart ~ yes they know they aren't supposed to but in reality they are children...... most times it is fine and I let them explore but they know that if I am holding their hand it is because there is a safety issue it is like clue to them that they should be more careful.

 

[cyb]

Watch Modern Family Episode of DL trip this year.

***** spoiler alert ******************


This was an issue, and they ended up buying the kid uncomfortable princess shoes to slow her down.

Must see for Disney lovers

Loved that episode! Best Modern Family episode ever!

 

[dzaharchuk]

really?

 

[tpettie]

Call it a "tether" and remind him that NASA tethers astronauts to the Space Station when they're outside working.

It's because they love their astronauts and don't want to see them drift away...

I have to say as much as I'm not a fan of these I really do like this way of thinking about it.

 

[DisneyFan32WI]

J E N A S S I S
Get out your jazz hands!

 

[TLSnell1981]

Oh, I just needed one more , before this is locked.