Which of life's transitions have you struggled with?

[ncc1701]

DH is struggling letting DD be an adult. She's 29 and lives with her boyfriend. Just last night he was talking about how he wished he knew more about this and that. I told him it's not our problem or concern. She's a grown up. He didn't tell his parent all his business when he was 29.

The thing that has struck me the most in a life transition is my father passing in 2021. He went in the hospital for some issues breathing and after 2 weeks passed. I knew he had lost a lot of weight but he was under 100 lbs at this time. His wife came to see him twice in those 2 weeks. Twice. The hospital was 5 min from their house. I stayed with him every day and at the end during the night. The hospital was 45 min from my house. It is hard having your father ask for your opinion when the Dr is asking if wants a DNR order. It's hard being the one forced to make those decisions.

So sorry for your loss and having to make those decisions. DH & I were lucky that our last surviving parents had been very clear on their wishes. And that in both cases our siblings were on board.

 

[Lord Manhammer]

Becoming a parent when I had no intention of doing so (but it turned out well)

Being estranged from my sister (I know, life's too short and all that, but I truly have no desire to see or speak to her ever again)

 

[SpaceMan5]

Being estranged from my sister (I know, life's too short and all that, but I truly have no desire to see or speak to her ever again)

Ah, yes. I can totally relate to your post. We are estranged from part of DW family, coincidentally the beginning of the end happened on Christmas day several years ago.

Life is short but we have decided not to waste that precious time on those that are not willing to compromise or seek some middle ground.

 

[Lord Manhammer]

Ah, yes. I can totally relate to your post. We are estranged from part of DW family, coincidentally the beginning of the end happened on Christmas day several years ago.

Life is short but we have decided not to waste that precious time on those that are not willing to compromise or seek some middle ground.

Thank you, sometimes when dealing with these things it can feel very lonely. It's comforting to know others out there are dealing with it too.

 

[SpaceMan5]

Thank you, sometimes when dealing with these things it can feel very lonely. It's comforting to know others out there are dealing with it too.

So true, so true

While I don't have the extensive collection of fine whiskey as you do, I will raise a toast of some Eagle Rare to you on Christmas day. Cheers!

 

[Lord Manhammer]

So true, so true

While I don't have the extensive collection of fine whiskey as you do, I will raise a toast of some Eagle Rare to you on Christmas day. Cheers!

And I will do the same to you my friend. Cheers and happy holidays!

 

[EveV]

Getting older

Taking care of an aging parent for me... The role reversal and setting boundaries can be difficult after 40+ years of doing things the regular parent/child way. My husband and I are finding out way through it together, so that is good, and I'm learning to let go of certain things that I just can't control or convince others of.

 

[Princess Me]

Becoming a widow at 44. It’s been very hard to just be myself again. We were together for 22 years, pretty much all of my adult life. I loved him dearly, but my husband had very strong opinions about everything. Most of the time I just indulged him instead of pleasing myself. I am now struggling with discarding “our” likes and opinions and figuring out my own.

 

[leebee]

I'll agree with @Lord Manhammer, becoming a parent when pushing 40 was an adjustment. I love my daughter, consider her the best and most shining part of my life, but finding myself pregnant was an adjustment. I liked the life DH and I had, and wasn't sure I was ready to make the change.

Right now? Aging. I don't feel old inside, but realize that my body is changing. I had knee replacement surgery last summer. I wasn't having any issues with my knee other than the usual "old injury, always my bad knee" stuff. A fall and subsequent MRI showed no cartilage at all so the replacement was done. Not sure I'd make the same decision again. I'm not healing as well/quickly as anticipated and that makes everything else harder. I am tired at night, too tired to accomplish anything here at home other than cooking/cleaning the kitchen. Is that due to my knee, or just getting older? I don't enjoy going to work anymore, although I've always loved teaching and interacting with my students (and also loved bench research... funny mix). Now? I go for the health insurance and paycheck. It's an odd phase of life, not having a lot of interest in a lot of things... mostly because I'm just tired.

 

[NannyBeBe]

Losing my sweet twin granddaughter at the age of six. She died during an asthma attack; went into cardiac arrest and was gone in the blink of an eye. It was over 6 years ago and we, as a family, will never be the same. Time does not heal all wounds.