What?

[Crystal0608]

I don't really hear sir or ma'am said a lot around here (NC). My response to the dentist may have been "What?", "I'm sorry, repeat again?", "Could you repeat that please", or even "Hmm?" but not "Sir".

 

[aprilgail2]

The answer wasn't "what/Sir"
It was the kids response when he didn't understand what the Dr had said to him. Wheather it was a question the Dr was asking or he was just speaking to the child "what" is never the proper response for a child to use toward an adult, when they miss what ever the adult just said.
I was taught "Sir?" is correct.
I don't suppose anyone uses "I beg your pardon" anymore either.

What????

It is here.

Perfectly fine here too!

I hope you are not saying that mothers who did not raise their children to say "sir" or ma'am" aren't "true ladies," because your comment reads like you are saying just that.

Now to me it is NOT perfectly acceptable to be calling me Ma'am- I would think you a rude little pissa if you were to say yes ma'am to me! It's like nails on a blackboard to me!

 

[mhsjax]

What????



Perfectly fine here too!



Now to me it is NOT perfectly acceptable to be calling me Ma'am- I would think you a rude little pissa if you were to say yes ma'am to me! It's like nails on a blackboard to me!

I swear, I don't think I have ever in my life run across so many people that get offended by the word Ma'am and sir. Only on the dis boards, I have plenty of friends from up north and they don't have a problem with it. Only people here seem to. Makes me wonder. OH well, you would just have to think that my kids are "rude little pissa's, because they have been taught to say ma'am and sir and please and thank you and excuse me. You know, all of those good mannered words that seem to offend so many people here.

By the way, when I was in NYC, everyone smiled at me when I said ma'am and sir. Got alot of compliments on it too.

 

[dismom0204]

I believe this is a regional thing. Has anyone heard of the term G.R.I.T.S (Girl Raised In The South) THATS ME!! I have always said yes ma'am no ma'am etc... my children do as well. Even to me. I was suprised when my daughters friend called me by my first name. I never would have called an adult by the first name. My kids use proper names as well. Call me old fashioned!!

 

[sasywtch]

What????
Ok, couldn't resist. I lived down by the south for awhile but CA born and raised and back here. Myself and children have never used sir or maam and I think we all are pretty good people. I don't get hung up on this kind of stuff. I too hate to be called ma'am.
One thing I really don't like is hearing kids call their parents sir and ma'am. I rather enjoy mom and dad. Much more loving sounding.

 

[hentob]

Thank God I live in the south. I just don't understand why some people take offense to good manners.

Sigh.

Good manners are not indigenous to The South. In fact, it is VERY crude, pretentious, and down right boorish to constantly point out that you have good manners This is something many southerners enjoy doing quite often. They have no idea how impolite it is.

We are relocating to The South, and if I hear one more realtor/ relocation tour person tell me how “everyone in The South is so polite” I am going to scream

FYI--it is NOT polite to tell me HOW polite you are. I will be the judge of that

 

[FireDancer]

FYI--it is NOT polite to tell me HOW polite you are.

It is right up there with pointing out how humble you are.

 

[aprilgail2]

I believe this is a regional thing. Has anyone heard of the term G.R.I.T.S (Girl Raised In The South) THATS ME!! I have always said yes ma'am no ma'am etc... my children do as well. Even to me. I was suprised when my daughters friend called me by my first name. I never would have called an adult by the first name. My kids use proper names as well. Call me old fashioned!!

All the neighborhood kids and my daughters friends call me by my first name and she calls all her friends parents by their first names....She had one friend that used to put "Miss" in front of my first name, I had to tell her that I really didn't care to be called that and could she please just use my name!

 

[hentob]

Ah, I couldn't tell you whether her Mom is a true lady or not but from the time I've spent in the South I do know that many of them are absolute experts at hiding all their nastiness and spite behind those pretty polite words.

Bless their hearts.

That is the thing

I would rather have someone be honest and upfront. Not all this "sweet and sugary, behind your back, bless your heart, I will smile while I am nasty because that is how polite we are here in the south". It is fake to put people down and not be upfront about it. It is NOT mannerly

We have met some very nice people EVERYWHERE. Yes. People have manners EVERYWHERE. And people LACK manners everywhere. In fact, I have never witnessed so many men that keep their baseball hats on while in a restaurant as I did when we were in NC

 

[hentob]

Thanks Ya'll
I'm headed back to the theme park board where the happy people are

Yes, of course. Only YOU are allowed to complain

About a child who was in the dentist's chair, nonetheless

 

[Karibeth19]

My DD12 would never use the term "Sir" in response to another man, because that is the name she uses for her grandfather!! It's a long story, but before my DD was born, my mom had this discussion with my dad (who has a very dry sense of humor):
Mom: "I think when our grandchild is born, I want her to call me Nana. What do you want her to call you?"
Dad (with a straight face): "Sir!"
So, it started off as a joke, which took off during my pregnancy, and by the time she was born, it just seemed right to call them Nana and Sir. So, she did, and still does. So, while she is great with her please's, thank you's, excuse me's, and even ma'am's, she would never use "Sir" with anyone else. It is a term of endearment reserved specifically for her grandfather!

 

[MiniGirl]

Now to me it is NOT perfectly acceptable to be calling me Ma'am- I would think you a rude little pissa if you were to say yes ma'am to me! It's like nails on a blackboard to me!

So, if you asked one of my dds (10 and 8) a question, and she responded with a "Yes ma'am" you'd think she was being rude? Why? I never understood that. I mean I don't like being old enough to be a ma'am, but truth is I am. Their intent with their response would not be malicious in any way, so why would it make them rude?

Not trying to start anything just trying to understand.

And as to the OP's comment, "sir" and "ma'am" isn't common here, but it is where I grew up. I do not expect my dds to respond with that, but a "huh" is definitely not acceptable, and a "what" depends a lot on the tone that is used. I prefer an "Excuse me, mom" or something like that though.

Also, I think it should be noted as well that sometimes we may not realize things are regional. For example, if you were taught a certain response was proper during your childhood, you do not realize that people in other parts of the country were taught something else. It doesn't make one more polite or more laid back than the other. Just different.

 

[lacrosse_lady72]

So many people get offended when ma'am or sir is used.

I don't have any idea on why people get offended but they do. I think some people have this idea that it makes them old but I think it's just politeness. Oh well, everyone gets offended at everything these days, it's best to just keep to oneself.

 

[Mrs.Toad]

Sigh.

Good manners are not indigenous to The South. In fact, it is VERY crude, pretentious, and down right boorish to constantly point out that you have good manners This is something many southerners enjoy doing quite often. They have no idea how impolite it is.

We are relocating to The South, and if I hear one more realtor/ relocation tour person tell me how “everyone in The South is so polite” I am going to scream

FYI--it is NOT polite to tell me HOW polite you are. I will be the judge of that

Thanks for saving me some typing.

 

[Lassie Lynne]

Well.....I try not to say "what?" when I don't hear people...but....apparently it does get said at home because "what" said very loudly is something our parrot says to us and quite frequently, so I guess I have raised a rude birdie-child

 

[minniecarousel]

My kids say Sir or Ma'am if they don't understand something or didn't hear.

I will say that Excuse me, I didn't hear you , or I'm sorry I didn't hear you r something like that you be fine, but if I ever heard "what" come out of my child's mouth. Well lets just say that it would be the last time they ever thought to use the word what. IMHO, saying what to an adult is extremely disrespectful and rude.
Thank God I live in the south. I just don't understand why some people take offense to good manners.

I don't understand why the word "what" is considered so rude?

I believe that we have good mannrs in my family. We have family in Louisiana & I find the "Sir" & "Ma'am" cute....very endearing. But it would sound strange without the Southern accent.

 

[Katy Belle]

I grew up in small town Nebraska and we always answered with "what?" Then I started teaching in small town Oklahoma and had a teacher's Assistant in my room that would freak if a child answered her with "what?" She wanted them to say, "Yes?" Or, "Excuse me?"

I've taught my own children to answer Yes or Excuse me. I think it does sound more polite.

 

[Mandy_in_NC]

I am a 911 Disptacher so I use Sir and Ma'am everyday. I have raised my kids to say Sir and Ma'am. However I don't like it when somebody calls me Ma'am. I went to the bike rally in Panama City Beach Fl a few weeks ago with a group of people. One of the guys is in the Military so Sir and Ma'am are standard for him. After about the 1st day I pulled him aside and told him that I know he was in the Military and it is standard use for him but I am only 33 and it was making me feel old so please quit calling me Ma'am. He told me that he had been raised that way and he didn't even know he was doing it. It made me feel so old to have somebody 10 years younger then me calling me Ma'am. But in the South we are taught from birth to say Sir and Ma'am as a sign of respect. There are still adults that I call by their last names. Just because I am out of school doesn't mean that I can call adults by their 1st name. And we also say Bless their heart or Bless their pea pickin heart.

 

[mhsjax]

Sigh.

Good manners are not indigenous to The South. In fact, it is VERY crude, pretentious, and down right boorish to constantly point out that you have good manners This is something many southerners enjoy doing quite often. They have no idea how impolite it is.

We are relocating to The South, and if I hear one more realtor/ relocation tour person tell me how “everyone in The South is so polite” I am going to scream

FYI--it is NOT polite to tell me HOW polite you are. I will be the judge of that

POint taken. Just please remember that when you move down here, we also don't like hearing about how mush better things are done up north. Because, most of us down here in the south can't stand to hear that over and over again. See it works both ways.

 

[jrmasm]

Who knew the word 'what' was offensive.

I'm so amused by that that I plan to use it as frequently as possible today.


What??