What would you do - school trip question

[always quiet]

My son's 8th grade class is taking a trip to Washington DC for the day in a few weeks. They leave at 5:45 am and don't return til 9:45 pm. Permission slips need to be returned by this Friday.

My son does NOT want to go! :confused2 He has never passed up on a field trip in the past, but I can't seem to either convince him to go or tell me why he doesn't want to go. We, as a family, have visited the museums they are going to go to. He will not be missing the chance to experience something he might never get to see again. I really don't know what to do. Since the entire class is taking this trip, I'm not even sure if sending him to school that day would even be an option.

Would you force your child to take this trip, let him stay home, contact the school and see if their is something he can do that day in school.................I am totally stumped here.

 

[gymnasticsmom68]

I wouldn't make him go. There must be a reason he wants to stay home. I'd probably let him stay home.

 

[stinkerbelle]

hmmm...I wouldn't FORCE your child to go if he really doesn't want to. but that's just my opinion

My 8th grade DC trip was a 3 day trip - so much fun, being in a hotel with all my friends...we had a blast...more social then anything else.

but for a day trip - to a place that he's been so often with you - I wouldn't force him.

And I would call the school and find out if any of the 8th grade teachers will even BE there that day (might all be chaperoning (sp?) on the trip.)

 

[Serena]

If it were something that he hadn't seen before and the opportunity probably wouldn't come again, then I'd probably either insist for a legitimate reason for the protest, or he'd go.

Since he's been there before I wouldn't force it, although I'd still try for a reason why he didn't want to go.

 

[wendyl]

I would make him go. To me, its still a school day--only it will be in another location. His 8th grade year is almost over, and he wont be able to get these moments back. School trips have a way of bringing kids closer together--and think of all the memories he would miss out on for his trip to DC.

sometimes our best experiences come from times when our expectations are lowest!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[poohtown]

don't make him go. I remember my daughter skipping an 8th grade field trip too. She admitted to me that it was a class that she really had no friends in and couldn't imagine spending a day with them socially. I let her stay home from school. I would try to talk to your son about why he doesn't want to go (but not push it - remember that 8th grade is a really tough time. He's old enough to know his reasons and they probably are right for him).
Is the entire 8th grade going or just a certain class? Are any of his friends going on the trip? He might be having a certain problem with a student that he doesn't want to be off school grounds with. I would talk to him and not the school. If he starts avoiding other school activities, then I'd call his teacher in hopes of shedding light.

 

[DoeWDW]

I don't think you should make him go on the trip. There may be kids he's trying to avoid or anxiety about the trip that he's reluctant to talk about.

 

[sue1013]

I've been through that with my DS. Seemed he never wanted to go on field trips. We told him if he had a good enough reason why he didn't want to go then he wouldn't have to go. His reason was always "it will be boring". To me, thinking something will be boring is not a good reason. He ended up having a good time on all his trips. He may not have liked the destination but had fun with his friends.

 

[RitaZ.]

I wouldn't force him to go. He may not be the only student that isn't going. I'm sure that the school will make accomodations for students that aren't attending. There is probably a reason why he doesn't want to go.

 

[mrsmom]

My ds is going on a field trip today about 45 minutes away from here. One of his best friends aren't going, he said the get sick to his stomach riding that long, I d ask you son why he doesn't want to go, then go from there..
Kim

 

[DISshopkeeper]

I wonder if he's concerned about terrorism? It might be something he'd be embarrassed to say....

 

[believe]

I would find out the reason and make my judgement on that. One thing to think about...sending your son when he doesn't want to go could make it rougher on the chaperones and could bring down the experience for others. I definitely would send him to school, even if he just sat there all day...otherwise he would think he could stay home for every field trip.

 

[CEDmom]

I wouldn't force him to go either but I would really push to find out why he doesn't want to go. If it were my child I'd probably say something like "I'm not going to make to go if you really don't want to but I would really like you to tell me why you don't want to go". Maybe someone is bothering him, maybe he doesn't want to be away that long. There could be any number of reasons but it might be something you could help him with or he might just feel better about if he opened up.

 

[Kimberle]

Have you spoken to his teacher(s)? Your son may be having a problem in some area, or maybe is afraid of that perticular teacher. Or, maybe there's a bully in the group going? I don't know. I would keep talking to him and try and get him to articulate his feelings plus talk the teacher.

In the end, I would not force a child of this age to participate in something he is so against.

Good luck,

 

[EsmeraldaX]

I used to hate going on field trips when I didn't know anyone in the class. Does he have friends in this class? Could he be concerned about being ignored by the other students on the trip?

Could he be worried about a particular student trying to hurt him or anyone else? Or terrorism in DC?

 

[iamsorcerermickey]

I wouldn't force him to go. Let him stay home and have a "free day" or if possible take him somewhere educational that is around your area that he is interested in.

I was also in the same situation with my son for a 5th grade 2-1/2 day field trip. I chose to let him stay home.

 

[MICKEY88]

I wouldn't make him go,,


but I would send him to school, so he doesn't see future field trips as free days at home..

I would also get him to share his reason for not wanting to go,,it could be something as simple as not wanting to go where he has already been, or something as complex as a fear of terrorism..

 

[Toby'sFriend]

Sounds like an 8th Grade boy.

I'm sure he has his reasons, most likely social. There will be other 8th graders not going, especially with those extended hours. Our school usually sets up some kind of extended study hall day for those not participating.

I wouldn't force the issue, but I wouldn't let him stay home that day either.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

My child would have to be honest with me and tell me the reason why. If I thought the reason was valid then I would let the child stay home. An 8th grader has the verbal skills to communicate issues and plead their "case".

That is how I would handle it.

 

[sharbear]

I didn't read all the answers yet but I would probably not make him go. I have an 8th grader (a girl though) and this year has been our worse socially. Maybe there is an underlying reason that he doesn't want to go.

This also seems to be the age that some kids do things that yours is not always comfortable with. And there way to deal with it (instead of standing up to their friends) is to avoid it. JMO .02

I wouldn't make him go to school either. I would try to do something just him and me. You will probably get the real reason he doesn't want to go. Or maybe he just thinks it's going to be really boring. But I don't think so, just a gut feeling