What is with strangers calling you "hon"?

[MrsDuck]

I'm in my 20s so I don't typically get the "hon" or "sweetie" but when I do I find it very off putting and irritating. We live in South Florida but I'm not sure if South Florida really counts as the "south"...

 

[Chocolate Cake]

Obviously at work, it's a big no-no, but if a diner waitress calls me "Hon" , I automatically warm up to her. I don't know why, I've always loved being called "Hon" or "Sweetie" in a coffee shop setting

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

DH and I were at the Dunkin Donuts drive through yesterday. I wasn't really paying attention and he said she kept calling him "honey". I didn't think anything of it until I realized she said it after every sentence...
"We're just waiting on the coffee honey."
"He's your bagel honey."
"Here ya go honey".

That was weird.

Then again I told a different girl there that I loved her on accident.
"Have a good day"
"Love you too, bye..."
Auto pilot. Awkward.

 

[dbramer]

It is big in Maryland, particularly Baltimore, and usually not meant to be offensive.

We even have a Hon-fest every year in Hampden (neighborhood in Baltimore.) Pretty normal occurrence here.

 

[leebee]

I hate it! I find it offensive and ignorant. Please don't call me by any of those names: Hon, honey, sweetie, babe, sugar, etc. Those are terms of endearment, and you are a total stranger to me. People deserve a certain amount of polite respect, and calling me by a name I normally would reserve for my spouse or child is just plain rude, IMO.

 

[mom2rb]

Threads like this make me worry about my son. He is going away to school in the North East. He addresses every teacher as Ma'am and calls his friends Honey, Sweetie, ect... It is hard enough to send him so far away, but now I am worried that he will offend people and not make friends. Just one more reason to be a crazy mom I guess.

 

[SandiR]

It doesn't bother me in the least.

Maybe it's because I'm getting older, but I don't understand why everyone is so easily offended nowadays. Comedians can't tell jokes, everyone else has to walk on eggshells...Really, unless I think someone is trying to offend me, I don't get worked up about it. We all need to just calm down.


Sorry for all the people I just offended.

 

[leebee]

Threads like this make me worry about my son. He is going away to school in the North East. He addresses every teacher as Ma'am and calls his friends Honey, Sweetie, ect... It is hard enough to send him so far away, but now I am worried that he will offend people and not make friends. Just one more reason to be a crazy mom I guess.

He'll be fine calling his teachers "Ma'am" or simply Ms. Lastname, or Mrs. Lastname, or, more appropriately if he's at a university, probably Dr. Lastname... however she introduces herself. Certainly not by a term of endearment or a first name unless she specifically asked him, individually, to please use her first name to address her.

He can call his friends whatever he wants, but he has to be FRIENDS with them, first, before calling them Sweetie. If he talks to a total stranger in the library and says something like, "HI Honey, how are ya doing?" he might be met with looks of contempt and a girl who hurries away. Just asked DD21, and she said if a strange guy approached her and called her Honey, Sweetie, etc., she'd feel threatened and be GONE.

 

[SallySkelington]

*shrugs* I'm used to it here. I grew up in a fairly small town where everyone knew everyone else. I wouldn't use it in a professional setting though, that's just plain weird. However I do use Miss/Mr Last Name or Ma'am/Sir. I consider it to be respectful.

 

[CPT Tripss]

Threads like this make me worry about my son. He is going away to school in the North East. He addresses every teacher as Ma'am and calls his friends Honey, Sweetie, ect... It is hard enough to send him so far away, but now I am worried that he will offend people and not make friends. Just one more reason to be a crazy mom I guess.

They have special reeducation classes for the behavior that you describe.

 

[disykat]

I have a fear of dentists. My dentist growing up called me sweetie, hun, etc. It always made me so nervous and added to my feelings of vulnerability. I'm sure he thought he was doing the opposite and reassuring me, but he was scaring me to death! I did tell my parents and they tried to reassure me that it was just his way, but I wasn't really convinced. I didn't grow up in an area where that was the norm, it was a new thing to me.

 

[CanBeGrumpy]

Threads like this make me worry about my son. He is going away to school in the North East. He addresses every teacher as Ma'am and calls his friends Honey, Sweetie, ect... It is hard enough to send him so far away, but now I am worried that he will offend people and not make friends. Just one more reason to be a crazy mom I guess.

"Ma'am" has a fairly negative connotation in the Northeast (or at least it did when I lived there). I'd tell him to be careful with using that term. The "honey" and "sweetie" things for friends (I'm assuming only female friends get these pet names) is also a no-no in my opinion. If any of my male friends called me by those names I would feel that they thought they were superior to me, or that I was weak. I would not like it at all.

 

[GaSleepingBeautyFan]

When I first moved to Georgia after living in the midwest, I hated being called hon or sweetie. I also hated y'all.

Now after living here for 27 years, I realized that just how people talk around here. I probably even do it too and don't notice so I'll apologize in advance to anyone going to Disapalooza (sp?) who I call hon.

 

[plutotek]

The affectations aren't annoying. Now "have a blessed day" is annoying AND insulting.

 

[disykat]

The affectations aren't annoying. Now "have a blessed day" is annoying AND insulting.

How is that insulting? I tend to think of "blessed"as a Wiccan or new age thing and I'm neither of those things. However, since they're wishing me well, I'm not offended.

 

[missnic]

I'm not exactly offended by being called 'hon', but it makes me feel weird. It's way too familiar for a setting like a coffee shop or restaurant. However, I really hate when people say 'Hey girl!' even (maybe especially if) the speaker is another woman. You don't ever hear 'Hey boy!'.

As far as sir/ma'am is concerned.. I grew up in the midwest, and moved to the south in high school. I was constantly in trouble and labeled 'rude' for not calling everyone sir or ma'am. It just wasn't done where I grew up. I really didn't like being the 'rude' kid for what amounted to a different dialect.

 

[Bluestars]

I think it's very unprofessional to call somebody hon or sweetie in a work environment. A coworker of mine used to do this when she was on the phone. It was like nails on a chalkboard to hear her speak to people like that. It made our company seem like the Beverly Hillbillies. It was very disrespectful.

Outside of a work environment, it doesn't both me.

 

[ilovepcot]

I like it just fine.

 

[danny1649]

It's a lot better than other things that I've been called.I would add when my dear grand mother thought I had done something real dumb "bless your heart".

 

[whitney250]

Threads like this make me worry about my son. He is going away to school in the North East. He addresses every teacher as Ma'am and calls his friends Honey, Sweetie, ect... It is hard enough to send him so far away, but now I am worried that he will offend people and not make friends. Just one more reason to be a crazy mom I guess.

He sounds like a lot of my male friends, they all address their female friends with hon, sweetie, darlin. I address my guy friends like this, as do my other female friends. I have always thought it was sweet, hopefully he won't have any issues!