We're Broke..

[mshrm]

It cracks me up when others decide that their philosophy of life is the "truth" for all. If you believe you "deserve" a vacation than you probably do! Im feeling pretty "deserving" myself lately too!LOL

Is it possible to take a cheap getaway?? Like do some tent camping and just getaway for a short time, like a long weekend? Or maybe pick a couple of weekends and pick somethings in the area that are free to do and check them out before you have to move to another area.

I feel your pain on being broke. In our early years together DH and I lived VERY tight and your right, it sucks. It gets better and just look around for ways to find your joy without spending much money.

 

[LisaNJ25]

Consider yourself lucky, at least with a government job you will have good healthcare benefits, which is worth a lot (may not seem important when you are young, but wait until you start a family) -- that's a leg up a lot of people don't have.

I agree..hubby is a county employee and his pay stinks.. but I look at the whole picture with benefits.

 

[crisi]

I think that language has a lot to do with how happy you are.

If you think you "deserve" things that you never get, many people will quickly get bitter about it. Changing the language to wanting things yo never get, and that still creates a want, but no longer are you being cheated out of something you "deserve." The difference is subtle - deserve implies that you have a claim to something - that you are entitled to it - it implies an external obligation. To want is to wish or desire - its an internal emotion. I think simple things like understanding the implications of the language you use can help your emotional health - as much as getaways do. YMMV, but when we are all going to have to make changes to our lifestyles (I read an article about millionaires having to cut back on their expenses too - not feeling sorry for them, but even they are having to change things) every little bit of positive attitude can help make that challenge more livable.

 

[3"Mouse"keteers]

i think everyone who works hard deserves a vacation, or a break of some sort!
it may be a want, but sometimes a necessity to keep your sanity!
you can't just work hard all the time with no reward for yourself, it isn't right.

It may not be right, but millions of people do it every year. Just be thankful that your husband has a job and that you're able to put food on the table for your family. Some people aren't so lucky right now!

 

[Need An E Ticket]

ThreeMusketeers,
When my wife and I first were married, neither one of us made much money. And after our first child, it was worse. We had government assistance (WIC)for my sons food for his first year to ensure that he was eating nutritious. But I look back on those times with great fondness. And, believe it or not, we miss it so much sometimes.

So my advice, take it or leave it, is make the best of what you have. Live for each other, rejoice in your DH finding his dream job (I'm still searching for mine ), and the time will fly by. It won't be long until you get the vacation you deserve. But don't be surprised if you look back like I do, and realize it was an incredible time in your life.

Good Luck! God Speed!

 

[ThreeMusketeers]

Consider yourself lucky, at least with a government job you will have good healthcare benefits, which is worth a lot (may not seem important when you are young, but wait until you start a family) -- that's a leg up a lot of people don't have.

We have a 6 year old daughter, and have been together 10 years. We just did life backwards. (Married my HS Sweetheart at 18.) So we still have time to grow financially. But it does feel like we have been struggling so so very long. We moved in together when we were 17, and worked FT, and still had to eat mac and cheese for dinner every night. HOWEVER, At 28/29 years old, the thought of eating mac and cheese every night for dinner again, esp. with a 6 year old daughter is not the idea i had in mind. DH and I both worked hard and put ourselves through school, He worked Full Time and went to school full time, graduated just this past May. And I have been working Part Time, taking care of DD and going to school PT. Graduated last December. (Went to Nursing school)

And I figured out last night, with what we are going to be paying for rent at this new apartment (and this is the cheapest we could find, in a neighborhood with schools i would deem appropriate and safe for our child) We would be carrying a 300,000 mortgage.... Maybe stupid financially, but emotionally, i couldn't drop my kiddo off my one and only at a school in a bad neighborhood or someplace we didn't feel comforatlable doing so. But, is that not sad, that to live in a DECENT crime free neighborhood, one has to plunk down that much money to live safe?? And that a 2 income family making almost 85,000 a year is going to be struggling to pay bills,(and we have NO CC DEBT) Just b/c we want to live in a neighborhood that is safe to live in???


We would just love to have a house before DD is 1/2 grown.

Although, last night I was thinking, and I realized...We can't get too much luckier..something is always going to be off balance.

I have a great husband, we still love eachother and have fun together..even in rough times after 10 years. And we have made this beautiful daughter together. And you know what, you guys are right, we could go on a small vacation and enjoy ourselves, we live very close to the Ocean and lots of other fun vacation spots. I guess, when things are rough and you have worked so very hard, your mind just goes to dreaming of that Caribbean island off in the middle of nowhere.
Thanks to all of you for your support and kind comforting thoughts.
Lets HOPE HOPE HOPE that things get better for the economy soon!!!!!::cop:

 

[DMickey28]

Yup, just did my spreadsheet update for the week. We are broke. I have no idea where the money is going (well I do) but it's just going so fast.

I keep telling myself that we are still young, we will get there but some days it's all I can do not to cry. DH makes a good living, he has a good future ahead of him but some days it just seems like all talk. We also live in a HCOL area and it's killing me. I don't work and I am so thankful that we are able to break even most months if not come out a little ahead and I get to spend this time with my DS.

Argh .. I was having such a good week to. We are going to Aruba this week for DH's President's CLub at work. All expenses paid and I am trying so hard to get excited but I just can't. I am so nervous about the weeks beyond that.

 

[dvcgirl]

Want? Yes!

Hope for? Yes!

Desire? Yes!

Deserve? No!

I too am feeling the crunch...but a getaway is not something we deserve.

Hope things even out for you soon!

Yeah, I have to agree with this. Do we all deserve some time off from our careers/jobs in order to re-charge a bit? Yes, absolutely.

Do we deserve a nice get-away? No. That's a discretionary spending item in my book and something I need to be able to comfortably afford in order to enjoy it.

 

[Grendalynn]

ThreeMusketeers,
When my wife and I first were married, neither one of us made much money. And after our first child, it was worse. We had government assistance (WIC)for my sons food for his first year to ensure that he was eating nutritious. But I look back on those times with great fondness. And, believe it or not, we miss it so much sometimes.

So my advice, take it or leave it, is make the best of what you have. Live for each other, rejoice in your DH finding his dream job (I'm still searching for mine ), and the time will fly by. It won't be long until you get the vacation you deserve. But don't be surprised if you look back like I do, and realize it was an incredible time in your life.

Good Luck! God Speed!

OH MY!! This brought tears to my eyes and I thought for a minute that my DH made up his own username and password , as this so very much hits home for me!!! We married young, started our family young, paid off school loans and struggled struggled struggled to make ends meet. As you say "look back with fondness..." very much relates to DH and I. What we endured when we were first married and young makes us who we are today. Yes, it broke his heart as I cried at the kitchen table because we werent able to pay our bills. He worked and worked as best he could to make a decent living and for me to stay home when DS9 was first born... we robbed peter to pay paul for many years, all the calls about our bills, utilitity disconnection notices.... But we always had food on our table, a roof over our heads, a loving, nurturing family, and our health and each other. Now, however, on a smaller/different scale, we are nearing that again. The sad part is that we both make decent money now!! We are the working poor!! The economy is in a downward spiral and scarily similar to the 1930's and 40's!!! The price/cost of living is going up up up, but our paychecks aren't!

We own our own home, drive nice vehicles and was able to take a nice vacation, but now its time to buckle down and scrimp and scrounge to save every possible penny. We are taking out a small personal loan to get rid of the added fees, interest and consolidate all our overhead into one payment. All of our credit cards (paid off or torn up) will go into a safe place until the economy picks up. We are going with the motto: "Pay as you go- Never Owe" . We will get that PL paid down with a 2-3 years and also plug away making extra payments on our house (a small mortgage) and our sole vehicle.

I work for our school district and make decent money... I have never had to have a summer job - always enjoyed being Mom July - Sept, but this year I am looking for a job part time just for a little extra cash... Unfortunatly, its a sign of the times.

But no matter how bad it seems to be getting for us, I always remind myself and my husband that it "could always be worse: we have food on the table, a roof over our head, warm beds, our health and each other. There are people a lot worse off in the US right now. Sad but true.

 

[TheRustyScupper]

Don't worry about it, you have a right to vent! for example the oil companies continue to report record breaking profits, but yet we pay over $4.00 for one gallon of gas!

1) Without creating a fight, oil companies ARE NOT at fault.
2) In fact, on a percentage basis, their profits are not too great.
3) In fact, they make about 8% profit, far less than other businesses.
4) It is popular for politicians to blame oil companies, but it is propaganda.
5) There are several causes, none of which we can cure
. . . high world demand
. . . level oil field output
. . . no open capacity at refineries
. . . SPECULATORS
6) Speculators add about $40 per barrel of oil!

NOTE: Just thought you would like to know. I am in the renewable fuels business, and the public knows very little about the high price of oil. And, the politicians would rather lay-off blame, since they know they cannot cure the problem and do not want the public to vote for someone else who says they can solve the problem.

 

[noodleknitter]

I think that language has a lot to do with how happy you are.

If you think you "deserve" things that you never get, many people will quickly get bitter about it. Changing the language to wanting things yo never get, and that still creates a want, but no longer are you being cheated out of something you "deserve." The difference is subtle - deserve implies that you have a claim to something - that you are entitled to it - it implies an external obligation. To want is to wish or desire - its an internal emotion. I think simple things like understanding the implications of the language you use can help your emotional health - as much as getaways do. YMMV, but when we are all going to have to make changes to our lifestyles (I read an article about millionaires having to cut back on their expenses too - not feeling sorry for them, but even they are having to change things) every little bit of positive attitude can help make that challenge more livable.

 

[Scrapologist]

We are sickened by the gas prices and everything else going up, but still I manage to tuck away $50 a month for vacation. I just can't see not having a vacation after working all year long and besides I would miss Disney too much!

We just save other ways instead of splurging on things we don't need. I look forward to my vacation each year and feel I deserve it! With the rising cost of everything, I might as well go when I can because I probably won't be able to afford to leave my house in a year.

 

[ldb1030]

My wife and I are doing ok, but there just does not appear to be an end in sight. However, I am considering a job change. I have been with the same company for 12 years and doing pretty well. But, they fired my mother two weeks ago after 14 years of service, and never any problems. If anything, she cared more about the company than anyone. The kicker is that she is in the middle of her third bought with cancer. We all know that she was let go for insurance reasons, but they told her that her job was being eliminated. I know for a fact that is not true. I have a hard time coming in everyday and working for a company that did that to someone, my mother or not.

That really, really stinks!! Yes, sounds like they can blame it on no longer needing her position but makes you wonder! Since you still work there you need to watch and see if someone else is doing her job...then you file a lawsuit since they told her that job was being eliminated!!

 

[Jhult]

I have already heard rumblings about others doing her job. They did not even offer her another position and there are others open. Lawsuit is pretty much out because she had to sign an agreement in order to get her severance.

 

[disykat]

I think we live in a society where people expect to make a good living a lot earlier than in future generations. I remember when being broke in your 20s was pretty much the norm - and it wasn't all that long ago!

Most of my friends bought their first homes, etc. around age 30.

 

[jnzimm]

I have found happiness in appreciating the things I have vs being upset about the things I don't have. I have my health a roof over my head food on the table, things I don't have a terminal illness, homelessness or hunger. I and my so both work and live below our means. We don't have car payments an upside down mortgage or credit card debt.

 

[starann]

The gas prices are really putting a dent in our family budget. My husband is a building/fire inspector and travels to do inspections. I am a visiting nurse and travel anywhere from 5 miles to 150 miles in 1 day to see my patients who truely need care.

My husband's company (a private sub contracted co) give him a flat rate mileage check every month (this month it went up $100/mo due to the increase in gas prices). My company gives us 0.50cents a mile, which is the same rate we were getting in Jan when gas was about $1.00 less a gallon
They don't plan on giving us anymore until the federal rate is upped. I drive a minivan and to fill the tank it costs about $70 a fill, times that by 3x a week and were are hurting. The 0.50 is not only for gas, but ware and tare on our cars, insurance, oil changes, tires and so on.....

We have 3 kids (1 is my 12yo neice who we have custody of) and I work OT at the hospital when I can. We pay our bills, but it is getting tight. We have really cut out the extras. Might be time to make some phone calls to cancel the Gold Package of cable and such. We do have a WDW vacation planned and paid for in Oct (tax return and stimlus check as well as help from the inlaws cause they are coming) but fear the gas to get down there will leave is in the poor house!!!!


Doesn't matter who is at fault for the gas prices....it sucks all around for the Americans (as well as other countries). Not much we can do about it except stop making silly trips to shop and spend more $.

I really try to limit the amount of driving I do...if I have to go to a store for something that can wait...it waits until I have someplace else to go that is over that way...kill 2 birds with 1 gas run.

No answers for anyone else....just know we are all plugging along with you.

 

[eliza61]

1) Without creating a fight, oil companies ARE NOT at fault.
2) In fact, on a percentage basis, their profits are not too great.
3) In fact, they make about 8% profit, far less than other businesses.
4) It is popular for politicians to blame oil companies, but it is propaganda.
5) There are several causes, none of which we can cure
. . . high world demand
. . . level oil field output
. . . no open capacity at refineries
. . . SPECULATORS
6) Speculators add about $40 per barrel of oil!

NOTE: Just thought you would like to know. I am in the renewable fuels business, and the public knows very little about the high price of oil. And, the politicians would rather lay-off blame, since they know they cannot cure the problem and do not want the public to vote for someone else who says they can solve the problem.

Thanks Rusty,
We're in the oil business (dh works at an oil refinery) and I crack up every time some one says it's the big bad oil company who's all at fault. I keep waiting for the voodoo dolls of the corporate execs to start popping up. Nobody talking about turning in the big gas guzzling suv's or down sizing their mcmansions though.

 

[disney1990]

Years ago, when we were very broke, I went out and bought a tent. That way we could still get away from home. I really didn't want to go camping for vacation, but it was better than no vacation at all.

 

[gaelic grace]

It's not the oil companies fault. Yes they are making a profit- that's what they are in business to do. I lived in LA during the mid to late eighties during the oil bust and I don't remember anyone offering to pay more for a gallon of gas so the oil companies could stay solvent. Their percentage of profit hasn't changed in fact in may have gone down. It's just that when you have profit of 10% on the dollar when gas goes up $1 a gallon you do make .10 more than you were but the percentage of profit doesn't change. I don't know too many businesses who have a cap on what they will make. That said I think there is an overall problem with corporate greed in what they pay some of their CEO's etc., but that is an across the board problem not just a big oil issue.
I also think that gas staying high in the long run will be good for our economy and country as a whole. Tom Friedman wrote a book several years ago called "The World is Really Flat" in it his premise is that we won't make change until it hurts and that until oil reached and stayed at $100 a barrel we wouldn't be willing to make the tough choices necessary to reduce our dependence on foreign oil. Hopefully that day has come.