wedding trainwrecks

[NHdisneylover]

Not a trainwreck at all, but a funny little story that we were laughing at by late the night of the wedding:

We had a priest who described himself as "not a people person" and that he "hates dealing with the public" he wasn't super friendly

My DBiL was the best man. We told him when and where the rehearsal was and everyone emphasized he MUST be on time. He was late. Very late. We ended up rehearsing without him, but not until after the priest went on a ten minute long yelling rant about how inconsiderate all the brides and grooms are these days (s if WE were the ones who were late or could control my DBiL). Somewhere in there he indicated he would make us pay for it during the ceremony

(oh, and DBiL came in about 5 minutes before we finished up--he'd gone for a long bike ride and lost track of time and didn't think it was a big deal--he is truly the mist absent minded person ever ).

So, the next day at the ceremony we get to the "you may kiss the bride" part (which we talked about and rehearsed and said we wanted ahead of time, very clearly) and the priest just goes silent and says nothing and glares at us.

It was kind of awkward for a minute, then I whispered "just kiss me" to DH and he did and everyone clapped and we walked back down the aisle together without worrying about what the priest was or was not saying or doing.

 

[Ember]

Biggest train wreck wedding I went to was a friends. They had a lovely ceremony and then had a reception program that involved speeches during the dinner. All the usual speeches happened and the bride and groom stood to give their speech. They announced that they had already been legally married for several years, but didn't tell anyone because they wanted their "wedding" to be taken seriously. It had a very "hehehe" feeling to it, like lying to their loved ones for a few years was just no big deal. Their families were so hurt at the lie that people started yelling and many people got up and walked out. A few even took back their wedding gifts!

At another wedding, the grooms mother stood up and made a speech about how the bride was her daughter now. She went on and on and on about it. When the brides mom gave her speech, she referenced the groom's mother's speech saying how her daughter would always be her daughter, and the groom's mom actually stood up, interrupted, and announced (again) that now the bride was her daughter. It was weird and very uncomfortable.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

Not a trainwreck, but maybe could have been...

My wedding, prior to the ceremony...I was in the bridal suite with my mom, my MOH (DH's sister), our ceremony reader (DH's SIL), and our flower girls (our 3 nieces). The facility coordinator had told us a few minutes earlier that she'd come get us after DH walked in with his parents.

Well...what actually happened was the coordinator's assistant poked her head in and said, "Alan (DH's brother and best man) is looking for Amy (SIL/reader)." We all thought he just needed to ask her something. So Amy opened the door wide and started down the hallway...which is when we heard the processional music playing. Either my mom or MOH yelled, "They started already!" and we all took off running. We managed to get there just in time for Amy to join Alan already in the processional, but she left her reading in the bridal suite (luckily, the minister had a copy of it up front), the 3 little girls just kept walking as well; my MOH only had to wait a moment or two before her turn.

In fact, if you look at the photo of Alan and Amy walking into the room...there's nobody in the doorway behind them. Thankfully nothing was thrown off and DH knew nothing about it, but I often laugh at how "Nobody told THE BRIDE that the ceremony had started!"

 

[ZephyrHawk]

This is a bit long, so my apologies in advance.

First the backstory - A few years ago DSIL decided to get married. The ceremony and reception were located across the state from where the majority of the bride's family lived (it was held near the groom's family). This made it just far enough away that driving to and from the bride's family's location was going to be difficult to do in one day (but doable). Seeing as how the wedding was on a Sunday and everyone had to work the next day, everyone who was going decided they would make the drive instead of getting local lodgings.

The grandmother of the bride (also DH's grandma) does not like to drive at night as she can't see well in low light, so DH and I voluteered to drive her and her boyfriend to and from the events, even though we knew that meant we'd have to leave early in order to get the old folks home before they turned into pumpkins. Anywhoo, bride's sister was out of state and in a feud with her sister, so she decided not to come. Bride's elder cousin's family backed out claiming they had young kids to care for (who had been invited) and they had to study for exams that weekend. Bride's younger cousin's family decided not to come because...actually...we're not sure. They were probably feuding about something, too. Point being, when all was said and done the bride's family in attendance was me and DH, one aunt and uncle, grandmother and boyfriend, her dad (DH's stepdad) and her mom. This was not a particularly small wedding. We all fit at one circular table. The groom's family took up at least 4.

Ceremony goes off. Pictures are taken. Everyone arrives at the reception hall. Shortly after dinner the aunt and uncle indicate they'll be leaving soon because of the several hour drive home they'd be facing. At which point, the mother of the bride states that she has an early shift the next morning and has to leave soon, too. This shocks us a bit and we ask her if the bride is okay with this. She assures us that the bride knows about her terrible work schedule. Aunt and uncle leave. Mother of the bride goes to the restroom to change into the more comfortable clothes she brought for the drive.

At about this time, the father of bride makes a comment that he had followed mother of the bride (his ex-wife) to the site and really had no idea how to get back home. We don't think anything of the comment. Soon the mother of the bride returns. We see her talking to the bride, who seems sad that her mom will be leaving, but understanding. Mom comes to say goodbye to us all and leaves. Father of the bride immediately gets up and says he has to go now as he's following the mother of the bride home. We sit shocked as he disappears out the door like a shot.

At this point, the cake has not been cut. There have been no special dances. The night is nowhere near over and we and the two 70 somethings are the only people left to represent the bride's family.

We figure that father of the bride must have cleared this with his daughter as well and said goodbye while we weren't looking. That is, until the bride comes over to the table and asks where her dad is. We have to tell her that he left the reception, apparently without saying goodbye.

This, understandably, sends the bride into a crying fit. She is devastated that her dad is not going to do a father-daughter dance with her (which, by the way, he had been told was happening). DH and I spend the next 20 minutes using everything within our cell phones' limited reception power to get ahold of the absent father of the bride. I finally get him using someone else's phone. I tell him the bride wants to talk to him. After talking to his crying daughter, he still decides he's gone too far now to turn around and he will not be coming back to the reception.

DH ended up dancing with his sister for her father-daughter dance. We had to leave immediately after the special dances to get the old folks home. I felt terrible about what had happened to the bride, who really is a lovely girl. A year later, she and her husband got divorced after he told her he just didn't love her anymore and wanted to move in with his new girlfriend.

 

[BlueStarryHat]

This isn't a train wreck, just a funny little thing.

Once, during the very formal Catholic ceremony of a wedding I attended, when the bride and groom knelt at the altar to get the blessing, the groomsmen had painted "Help Me!" on the bottom the groom's shoes.

 

[maelstrom]

This isn't a train wreck, just a funny little thing.

Once, during the very formal Catholic ceremony of a wedding I attended, when the bride and groom knelt at the altar to get the blessing, the groomsmen had painted "Help Me!" on the bottom the groom's shoes.

This happened to my husband's uncle as well.

 

[LoserMomma]

Wow! These stories put into perspective the wedding I went to this weekend. My baby brother got married Saturday....in Rochester Minnesota....outside. You may have heard that they got a bit of a surprise snow storm there on Thursday/Friday.....18 inches of snow.

Everyone banded together, they got sides for the tent, shoveled out some snow, the bride ditched her cute sandals for a pair of bright red boots and they had a snowman in the background of all the pictures. They turned lemons into lemonade and it was a lovely day! The sun had broken out and it ended up warming up nicely on Saturday (and the snow just melted away as the day went on)

 

[sharonmickey]

DD married last year in a beautiful outdoor ceremony. Partway through the wedding the bride, groom, and minister start laughing uncontrollably. A bird had flown above the couple and done it's business on the groom's tuxedo. It relieved much of the emotion we were all feeling.

Later in the evening (the immediate family was all staying at the bed and breakfast with the couple) everyone had retired into their own rooms. Around 12:30 someone starts knocking on a bedroom door. Being curious, I looked outside to see who was in the hallway. There was the bride, knocking on MY door! The groom was sick and she didn't know what to do.

In the morning when we woke up the grooms father and stepmother were gone. They left without saying goodbye. His mom and stepdad came to breakfast then they too left without saying goodbye to anyone. Neither of the grooms parents even knew he was sick. The bride and groom ended up staying at my house for the weekend and I went away. The groom was too ill to drive.

 

[Fire14]

My own wedding had it's moments:
1. My MOH decided it would be cute to fly in Evening prior to wedding, D/t time zone changes she got in around 3:30p our time. I ( bride) and other BM had to pick her up from airport and book it back to dress salon so they could do final dress fitting/alterations in less than 24 hrs. My MOH had never seen dress prior to fitting, was standing there in salon trying to decide what shoes to wear with dress, I didn't care just wanted black closed toe, poor Dress salon employees just wanted to be done I'm sure. I could have rung her neck.
2. Day of wedding DH2b was driving up to wedding that day and at some point Wife of a friend of his decided she preferred to ride up with DH2b instead of driving self ( her DH was working at College near wedding location). Well DH2b starts driving his car and suddenly hears something and engine light comes on, so he turned around and parked his car back at house and they ended up taking Friend's wife's car. Dh2b gets to hotel and gets off elevator and first words I hear are my car blew up, being nurse I asked r you ok? all was fine. So I go back to getting ready in hotel room which is not meant to be wedding staging area and looks like hurricane had went thru with 4 girls trying to get ready, 2 lil kids and hair stylist.
3. my Brother drops my niece( flower girl) off at hotel to hang with girls until wedding, I swear he just grabbed her from her bed, Hair was a mess, chocolate smeared on face and she's still in jammies, so I get to get her ready, plus myself ( the bride).
4. Once at wedding site that I had to drive self to, I'm trying to find place to store car keys as I wasn't stuffing them in my bra and neither of BM's would either, I ended up giving them to my brother with threat of if he did anything funny he was dead meat.
5. after wedding the wedding party headed back to hotel to get ready for reception dinner but MOH decides she is going to go out with her mom ( who crashed wedding) to buy us a wedding gift, MOH leaves her cell phone at hotel and doesn't come back by time we needed to leave to get to reception place, so I being bridezilla decide the heck with her, we told her to be back by such and such time and she was told reception place hopefully her mom can find it. AS I'm heading out phone rings, it's MOH saying MOM had hit bicyclist and everyone is ok but can I come get her!! So the other bridesmaid, the decorater and my Dh head to reception, while I take niece with me and go get MOH. I was so ticked I just pulled up at Accident site asked cop if MOH was free to go, yelled at her to get butt in car and took off for reception. MY parents were mad, I looked like crap but I was gonna eat, first thing I did was order a stiff drink.
After reception the Bridesmaids and DH and I headed back to hotel but Niece wanted to come with Aunt J and Uncle Monkey and wouldn't let go of US, So I told my brother to come fetch her at hotel in about an hour ( it was not far from my parents house). WE finally ditch kid, I told MOH I was pissed and would speak with her later. So DH ( who had been up since 3am) crashes on bed, I'm just mad at world and not fit to be around so I leave hubs a note and go to my parents house to use internet where Dog decides to walk on my new white shoes.

 

[Aladora]

My wedding was filled with mishaps, luckily we got through all of them and we are celebrating our 14th anniversary this year!

1. My family is Jewish but DH's is not. We chose not to have our wedding in a synagogue since we are not religious, instead we had it at a Unitarian church with specific instructions NOT to mention god at all. My grandfather was so upset by this that he almost did not come to the wedding after flying all the way from South Africa to British Columbia.

2. My father brought my stepmother to the wedding. This was the first time since the divorce that my grandparents had seen him and even though the divorce was TWENTY years before, my grandmother still told me that she did not want "that ****" at the wedding.

3. DH went out a week before the wedding for his bachelor party, ended up poking himself in the eye (EVEN longer story there!) and he had to miss 3 days of the officer training course he was on. 3 days before the wedding he called me from the base and told me that because he missed a few days, he wasn't allowed to leave base for our rehearsal and he was only going to be able to get a few hours off for the ceremony. After I said a few choice words and hung up on him, he convinced them to let him have the two days off.

4. At the church, waiting to walk down the aisle, the processional has just started and one of my bridesmaids jokes "y'know, if you have to throw up just use those bushes out there!" I turn to look, only to see the limo back into the side of my car! It took out my side door as I watched. My friend grabbed me, spun me towards where the ceremony was and said "One day, this is going to be hilarious. Now, let's go get you married!"

5. There is one last story that is long and it involves me forgetting my suitcase for our wedding night at home and also forgetting my house keys which resulted in my digging in the dirt in my poufy wedding dress, looking for the spare key I had buried in my front garden.

My cousin bought and filled out a wedding book for us and there were so many memorable oopses that she filled two pages with just those stories!

 

[SpartanMommy]

This was about 30 years ago. The bride was a friend, young (21) and had fallen hard for who we called "the mystery man". He was 40-ish, handsome and sophisticated, seemed to have a lot of money to flash around, but was rather vague as to where this money was coming from ("deals", "investments", etc., etc. and was out of town a lot).

The wedding was being held in a fancy hotel. We had all gathered for the ceremony but the groom was running late. He was supposed to be bringing the minister with him. After about a half-hour, the groom shows up in his tuxedo, with his teenage son (who the bride did not know about), but without the minister. The groom, bride and her family went into another room. We milled around for another half hour until the bride's father came out and made the announcement that there wasn't going to be a wedding, but please to go ahead and enjoy the food and drinks, and that he would talk to everyone later. He then went back into the other room.

Now, the bride's previous boyfriend, who she had left to take up with "mystery man" had showed up uninvited, but was behaving himself up until then. However, he was hitting the bar rather hard. After a while, the bride-not-to-be, groom-in-disgrace and her family came out of the room and the bride's father started circulating to explain that the groom seemed to have forgotten (and just remembered?) the fact that he was still married to his first wife. Why "mystery man" was still hanging around at that point is beyond me......I assume he would have been in the next state by then, but nobody asked me my opinion, yaknowwhaddimean?

Sooo, things were proceeding in a rather civilized manner (as much as we, her friends, were debating whether to take "mystery man" out in the parking lot and castrate him or not), the ex-boyfriend approached "mystery man" with an outstretched hand as if he wanted to shake his hand. "Mystery Man" extended HIS hand, whereupon ex-boyfriend hauled back and punched him hard in the face, knocking him out. Ex-boyfriend was hustled off, paramedics were called (and given the official story that "mystery man" had tripped and fallen...on his face...hard) and we all decided that the show was over and went home.

I did attend her next wedding three years later and it went off with no surprises, and, to my knowledge, she is still happily married. What happened to "Mystery Man" is anybody's guess.

Wow! That is quite the story! Glad she had a non-eventful wedding after that one!

 

[lorimay]

It was at my cousins wedding in the 70's, I was probably 12/13 at the time.

I just remember as we were all walking into reception hall, the wedding cake just fell off the table SPLAT on the floor!!!!!

Everyone stood there with mouths open. So no cake served at that wedding...

It was July so the following day we went to Sanibel Island for vacation.

Well my cousin and his new wife were honeymooning there at a different hotel also.

But every day they came to our hotel and hung out with us all day. I remember my parents commenting on why they would keep hanging out with us on their honeymoon.
I think it lasted less than 5 years.

 

[yoopermom]

My BF's sister was getting married, just about to walk down the aisle, and her mother came screaming down the aisle, "She's not breathing, I think she's dying". Turns out the bride had a brain anyerism (sp?), and ended up getting married in the hospital a week later. The church was only a few blocks from the hospital (even though everyone lived way out in the country), and the doctors said that it probably saved her life, that it happened when she was so close to help. We all stayed and prayed though!

Terri

 

[TheAviator]

Wow most of these stories read like a movie treatment. Some funny stuff. I really don't get how someone is about to marry someone and oh BTW I have a teenage son, who doesn't tell their wife that? Although I've known other people who actually kept the fact from their bride that they had multiple other kids they did not know about.

 

[NotUrsula]

Several members of my extended family are in the wedding business ... oh, the stories we tell when we get together.

As to my own wedding, there were three issues:

The best man (my BIL) failed to show up at the ceremony, we drafted my MIL to stand as witness. He DID of course show up by the reception, and ate way more than his share of food.

Several people in the wedding party were unfamiliar with the location of the church, so those who did know split up and rode with the others to act as guides. It didn't occur to them until they all arrived there that they had left me behind at my sister's house and taken all of the cars. (This was before cell phones.) My niece had to drive back to get me.

There was a college football game that night, and the desk clerk at our hotel took a bribe and gave away our room. When we arrived at 1 am we were given our luggage and a refund and told so sorry, that they had no rooms left. DH was three sheets to the wind, so I had to drive around until 3 am until I found a hotel that still had an available room.

 

[StephMK]

Some of these stories are hilarious! Sorry for the ones that had mishaps. I have not been to any truly crazy weddings.

Mine was smooth for the most part. One of DH's family members brought a bird to my wedding. I didn't even know until we saw the pics later - she had an exotic bird in her purse that she pulled out at the reception to show some kids.

 

[Pakey]

My youngest brother and his group of friends were very tight through high school and college and most of them married within a few years of each other after college graduation. It was the custom within their group to play some prank on the groom.

For one of the friends, one of the last to marry, they held him down and painted a bullseye on his butt cheek after the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding. The next day, during a very large wedding ceremony, the groom fainted and couldn't be revived. He was taken by ambulance to the hospital and was diagnosed as having a severe allergic reaction to something in that paint. He almost died.

The friend and his bride ended up marrying a week later in the hospital room. None of the gang were invited to attend. In fact, this friend never spoke to my brother or his group of friends again. My brother felt terrible about this but always thought the friend overreacted because he had also participated in the pranks on prior grooms, including my brother.

Years later, my husband and I were at a church dinner and we were seated at a table with some people we didn't know. This man kept looking at me and said I looked familiar and asked my name. He asked if my maiden name was "xxx" and I said yes. He then told me that he and his wife were the parents of the bride from that wedding and they remembered my brother quite well. They got up and moved to another table!!!!

 

[minkydog]

My cousin-in-law was in a terrible car accident the day before her wedding. Luckily she was banged up but okay (and very sore). At the rehearsal dinner after she got out of the hospital, her mother (a total witch if ever I met one) told her that she looked like a *deleted* because the bride to be wore dress pants and a dress shirt to the dinner instead of a dress. She also conveniently "forgot" to pack the bridal party gifts into her car and then chastised the bride for even having asked her to do it yelling "you knew I was too busy to deal with that ****!"

At teh actual wedding, the bride's aunt (mom's sister) got fall down drunk and was hitting on every male in the room, including her own nephews and was caught making out with one. I was sitting in the lounge area and she walked in and screamed "WOOOOOO!!" and hoisted her dress skirt up over her head...flashing her lack of underwear to all of us in the lounge.

The bride's brother and groom's brother coerced all the younger crowd into doing KEG STANDS (which my older sister, then 37) happily took part while I tried to find a hole to crawl into.

The groom had one friend in attendance who happened to be black. Bride's aunt (not the one from above) came up to him at the bar (it was a self-serve bar) and yelled at him that he needed to hurry up clearing tables and make her a drink...then muttered something horribly racial about him being "the help".

At the end of the night, the mortified and exhausted bride and groom tried to hop in their limo to head home, when the bride's stinking-drunk brother jumped in with them and a couple of his friends and demanded they drive them all home (in a different town opposite of the bride/grooms home), even though they had a ride available. When they refused, the witch mother raised holy hell about the bride being selfish.

I wound up as the designated driver (only one not drinking) and ferried a boatload of drunken siblings and cousins home. My younger sister picked a HUGE fight with me because I refused to allow her to smoke in the car...then went on a nightlong crying jag that culminated in her storming out of our shared hotel room at 3am and slamming the door behind her hard enough to wake everyone in that hall....all while I never spoke one word.

Good times.

Is that you, Honey Boo-Boo?

 

[branv]

I have been to a few weddings that are mouth droppers, but the stories are just too long. Ten years later people I told the stories to still bring it up, and they weren't even there. They were just so bad that they were awesome.

That being said, my sister was a bridesmaid at a wedding where the bride ended up getting a horrible stomach virus the night before. She was intensely ill, but was NOT going to reschedule her wedding and lose the deposits. So she went through the entire ceremony sitting down on the steps to the altar, with a bucket in her arms

 

[NCRedding]

My roommate in college had a tumultuous relationship and trip to the altar with her husband. Her parents hated him at first; he ended up marrying someone else, then divorcing, after she dated someone twice her age. Finally they decided to marry. Half of the invitations ended up getting lost (I was a bridesmaid and never received my invitation). The groom's father got sick the night of rehearsal. As we were standing at the altar, a huge thunderstorm broke out (in February) and the power went out. We were standing in the dark, trying to hear the minister when one of the other bridesmaids passed out cold. My roommate looked over her shoulder to see the bridesmaid, turned back to the minister and said, "Keep going, do not stop this wedding" They've been married 26 years.

At my wedding we had two mishaps: the assistant minister's mic was upside down in the clip on holder, so every time he breathed, it sounded like thunder as his robe touched the mic. We also had a fly that kept buzzing around my dad as we were standing at the altar. Then he landed on dad's glasses and walked across them. Dad blew air up at him to make him leave; he flew down and landed square on my dad's nose. We all cracked up.