WAY OT!!! My son lost his eye lashes???update child abuse!!!!!

[mrsmiller]

thanks zdesiree

I took my son to NY Eyes and Ears hospital today, I have an appointment friday to see the eyelid specialist I will print out the information and take it with me..
Thanks again
Linnette

 

[wdwshopaholic]

I'm sorry vHoffman but your stories just aren't making sense. Are you talking about the first time you claimed CPS first showed up at your door?

At the time you posted that thread you said your DH was home You said that he originally answered the door and came to get you.... so he certainly wasn't at a job interview and there was certainly no need for the Social Workers to grill you on his whereabouts. He would have been standing right in front of them, that is up to the point where he left the porch to phone the lawyer you keep on retainer.

Are you talking about at the lawyer's office? But you just said that the Social Workers didn't show up for that meeting. It would be awfully hard for them to twist your words around if they weren't there to hear your words.

Of course you could be talking about a subsequent interview, except then you claimed that they have never gotten back to you and that your lawyer has advised you not to contact them, which certainly points to a conclusion that there have not been any subsequent intervies.

Ah well, I'm sure you have all this straight somewhere in your head.

To the OP - try not to stress too much. I'm sure it will all work out fine.

Dude.
Obsess much.


To the OP-hope all works out for the best for you.

 

[Dagny]

I just want to remind everyone to keep it nice and respectful in this thread. A few posts have been a a bit on the "not so nice" side. We are here to support each other as best we can. There is absolutely no reason to throw blame, make accusations, analyze every word written or send rude PM's to people.

Don't make me put you in a time out, LOL.

Let's all have a group hug now, ok?

 

[SunKat]

Thank you all for your kind words and all the advise, it really helps not to feel alone!!!

I spent the day running getting papers and taking my son to NY Eyes and Ears hospital, I did not mention the doctor when we took my son to the hospital but things are getting a little more complicated, the doctors told us that they cannot understand what is going on, for starters there is no trauma, or any signs that my son is pulling at the eye lashes they looked at his eyes with special instruments and ordered some test because they are baffle at what is going on , they did rule out cancer or any disease, I have to take him back friday, as per the eye doctor that we took him first he did make the phone call to CPS I called him today and he implied that it might be my husband; I am not going to worry because my concience is clear I know we have not done anything wrong, we did call an attorney just in case and chances are that we will have to cancel our trip to Disney this year, i am trying to calm down because this is affecting our boys and I do not want them to worry any more. But like I said before I believe in God and I know the truth will come out,
Thank you all again

I am sorry you are going through this. I wanted to respond because I have friends who just went through this nightmare with CPS. Their baby fell and injured his head. At the ER, the attending physcian called CPS. Here they were, scared to death about the health of their baby and they were being accused of child abuse. What CPS put this family through is disgusting. The Mom was so stressed, she had to be hospitalized; they threatened to take their other child away. But to make a long story short, they finally found a neurologist at a top notch university hospital who correctly diagnosed the baby. This doctor was livid when he learned that the original ER doctors misdiagnosed the baby. The little boy had a pre-existing neurological condition that had nothing to do with his fall. The neurologist was able to get the entire case dropped. My point in writing all this is, find the best physician you can, there is one out there who I guarantee can pinpoint what is going on with your son. You also wrote that CPS is basically accusing your husband now. The same thing happened with my friends. CPS started playing "good cop bad cop" with the Mom and Dad, trying to get one to rat out the other. Stay strong!!

 

[mommanne]

Mrs. Miller, you might be the first person in the history of CPS to be accused of child abuse by eyelash plucking. Just think of how ridiculous this accusation is!

Keep that in mind, get your child's medical records in order and fight this atrocity. I don't think you'll have to fight too hard. Don't be paranoid, you'll be fine.

Hugs for you.

 

[rainy~daze]

Mrs. Miller, you might be the first person in the history of CPS to be accused of child abuse by eyelash plucking. Just think of how ridiculous this accusation is!

Keep that in mind, get your child's medical records in order and fight this atrocity. I don't think you'll have to fight too hard. Don't be paranoid, you'll be fine.

Hugs for you.

when you put it that way it does sound funny. eyelash plucking. now eyebrow plucking may be abuse, though. at least I feel like it is when I do it to myself. ouch-LOL!
Prayers are with you, MRSMILLER, and your little boy! The last thing you need when you are trying figure out what can be wrong with a child is any added stress, no matter what or who it is!
I remember when I went to the er once for severe back pain, the nurse would not let DH come in with me at first and she asked if I was safe at home, does anyone hurt me, etc? I was like, huh, you think he hits me? It is their job to protect and thank goodness they do, I am sure plenty of lives are saved every day because of it!

 

[ohiominnie]

My dad is a smart alek. One day he was working in the barn and pounding something into the wall. Well, one of those triangular shaped hoe thingies was on the hook on the wall and it came down and put a hole in his head. Of course, being a head wound, he bled....A LOT!! It was a decent sized hold (dime sized) so my mom took him to the ER b/c they thought it might need a stitch or two.

In the triage area they asked "how did this happen?" and my dad said, "my wife hit me in the head with a gardening hoe."

Yeah, they didn't think that was funny at all.

That's cuz they didn't know my dad!

Ok, back to the regular topic. Just thought I'd mention our family's run in with the system.

OP, good luck. I do notice an inconsistancy though with the docs....how can they say you're abusing him by plucking out eyelashes when the other doc says there is no evidence that they were plucked???

 

[pjhootch]

Mrs. Miller, you might be the first person in the history of CPS to be accused of child abuse by eyelash plucking. Just think of how ridiculous this accusation is

It is always sad and frightening when parents are unjustly accused of abuse, and it sounds like the original eye doctor was very harsh and aggressive. However, if he saw something that he could not explain medically and he had reason to be suspicious, then he needed to report it. Many MANY reports are investigated and result in a finding of no abuse. Many more reports are not even investigated.

However, (this is NOT aimed at you OP) parents do some very strange things to children as punishment, and this is one I've seen before. Again, I'm not suggesting the OP is abusing her son, far from it. I'm just saying that in my line of work (yep... one of those ambulance chasing child welfare attorneys) we see some of the most bizarre behaviors from parents that you can imagine.

I hope you get this straightened out quickly and it certainly sounds like you are doing everything you can under the circumstances. Good luck to you and your family.

 

[Ava31]

Mrs. Miller, you might be the first person in the history of CPS to be accused of child abuse by eyelash plucking. Just think of how ridiculous this accusation is!

Keep that in mind, get your child's medical records in order and fight this atrocity. I don't think you'll have to fight too hard. Don't be paranoid, you'll be fine.

Hugs for you.

Seriously! I've been reading this thread in awe. I can't believe some moron that calls himself a doctor would think that you would pluck out your son's eyelashes (a ludicrous act in itself) and then take him to the doctor to find out why he has no eyelashes. I mean, it makes sense if you broke your kid's arm and then took him to the ER with a bogus story...you have no choice but to deal with that, the arm has to be set. But, honestly, if someone were to pluck their child's eyelashes, what purpose would they have to bring him to a professional? It's not like they can fix it with hair transplants.

Have your son's eyelashes started growing back in? It seems like if this was a simple case of "plucking" the eyelashes would have started coming back by this point. However, if the poor little guy's eyelids are still bald, it sounds like something is physiologically abnormal.

Good luck and as stressful as this is, remember your health and that of your family, because that seems to be easy to overlook in overwhelming adversity. In the long run, when this case gets thrown out, your health is what will continue to suffer if you don't take care of yourself now.

 

[meandtheguys2]

OP, Hope you are able to discover the underlying issue with peace. That is really the problem with the stupid doctor. He has made this issue of concern for your child doubly wretched.

Was thinking last night, that I lost about 2/3 's of my lashes and brows when my thyroid went haywire. My friends son lost his, and it was later discovered he had lead poisoning, which has since been treated, and they are back! If you do blood tests, you might want to ask your doc to check for the metals. (Not meaning to scare you.)

 

[mrsklamc]

Yes, IF a doctor has reason to suspect child abuse he is obligated to report it. The problem in this case, though, is the fact that the doctor suspected child abuse at all.

A reasonable person- especially a doctor- shouldn't jump to that conclusion when a quick google search or a check of a Physician's Desk Reference turns up several answers that make more sense.

When this thread was first posted, was anyone's first thought seriously "I bet someone (besides the son) is pulling them out!"

 

[Dixie Luvr 98]

kate 0305 and Linnette,

When a malicious neighbor keps reporting minor or nonexistent incidents to CPS, the SW was wonderful. She admitted the only reason they investigated was that the woman was so persistent.

I had just fought and clawed my way out of 18 year abusive marriage and every call included, "There is no father in the house". (My kids insist that is the best thing I ever did for them!)

The SW was kind, calm, and made the whole process as painless as possible, She interviewed me, estranged husband and all four kids and found no basis for the reports. The entire matter was over in a day and we never heard anything else,

Social Workers don't endure their pay and caseloads just to snatch children away from innocent parents.

Linnette, if there was no sign of trauma or pulling, I dont see any reason to suspect abuse. Take care of your DS and hopefully by Aug, you will be able to make you trip!

 

[Poohgirl]

I have a flip side story...

My two boys are 16 months apart. A few years ago when my youngest was about 2 and couldn't yet speak, his brother took a desk lamp, pulled the shade off and put the lit bulb to his back. This made an instant huge blister.

So, of course I called his Ped. right away and took him in. I was FULLY expecting him to have to call CPS, just due to the injury and me giving the details that his brother causing the injury.

I guess fortunately for me, this was (and still is) my boys Ped since birth and was very familiar with me and my children. A am assuming that because he was already observing my older son for anger and other issues toward his brother he believed what happened.

However, this situation easily could have been thought to be child abuse. Its a very fine line reporters have to balance.

 

[mmmagique]

It is terrifying to have CPS looking in to you.
When my ds was small, he was not sitting right in his chair, and banged his mouth HARD on to the table.
My babysitter turned me in for child abuse.
When the police arrived at my door, I almost had a heart attack, but they were very nice, and quickly assessed the situation for what it was.
CPS did insist I take him to a dentist, however, and when I told them why I was there (I had to have them sign something) every person in that office treated me as if I HAD done something.
It was humiliating.

 

[meandtheguys2]

kate 0305 and Linnette,

When a malicious neighbor keps reporting minor or nonexistent incidents to CPS, the SW was wonderful. She admitted the only reason they investigated was that the woman was so persistent.

I had just fought and clawed my way out of 18 year abusive marriage and every call included, "There is no father in the house". (My kids insist that is the best thing I ever did for them!)

The SW was kind, calm, and made the whole process as painless as possible, She interviewed me, estranged husband and all four kids and found no basis for the reports. The entire matter was over in a day and we never heard anything else,

Social Workers don't endure their pay and caseloads just to snatch children away from innocent parents.

Linnette, if there was no sign of trauma or pulling, I dont see any reason to suspect abuse. Take care of you DS aand hopefully by Aug, you will be able to make you trip!

You were blessed to have such a SWer. It is great that you realize that. The world could certainly use that sort!

Unfortunately one can't count on that. Case-managers are paid very little compared to any other Bachelor degree programs. Most of the good ones move on, up or out. Others stay, for reasons that include the feeling of power, and self righteousness. And some, heaven help 'em, stay out of love and loyalty to the clientele.

 

[RunDanceSkate]

How Idiotic!!! Print all the eye website info you have been give here and take it to a new Eye Dr. immeadiately!!

This site just about had me plucking my own eyelashs and this is a school science lesson!!
http://www.worsleyschool.net/science/files/eyelash/creatures.html

Why oh why did I click on this link?

 

[RunDanceSkate]

Hopefully the fact that the 2nd doctor said there was no sign of eyelashes being pulled will be enough to keep CPS away. When my DD firsh started losing her hair and eyebrows (she has alopecia), someone called CPS. They came to the house which was a disaster that day, but after talking to DD and myself they left and we had no further issues.

Cindy

 

[KristiKelly]

OP, I was just thinking about you and wondering how everything is going.

 

[tink2dw]

Yes,OP, You and Your family have been on my mind for several days and I was hoping that you could update us soon!!

Much Pixie Dust for Your Family ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

[eeyoregon]

OP:

Give me the name of that whacky eye doctor and I'll show him abuse!!!

Hang in there and remember to trust your mommy instincts. When my son was 18 months old he would have on and off bouts of vomitting and wobbly walking (more so than a normal toddler). After several diagnosis of flu or virus over a few months period, I persued the symptoms until a referral with a neurologist was ordered. Three days later and an MRI, we had our diagnosis: a plum sized brain tumor. Every time it had a growth spurt it would press on the nasuea/balance center of the brain and cause the symptoms. He has surgery a few weeks later and thank the lord it was not cancerous.

Good luck to you and your family...you will get thru all of this.