Vacation... or is it?

[gopherit]

We will be heading to WDW later this summer and per usual are bringing family along. However -- the family members we are bringing have been beseiged by one thing after another. Their child born last winter had a congenital defect that required surgery. THen surgery again most recently. THen a close relative had a heart attack (and they will be the family nearest so hence have assisted this family member while he rehabs). Furthermore, they have bitten off quite a bit to chew, even without these issues. THey just sold their house and are building a new one -- which they plan to move into 2 weeks before the trip. Wow. My head spins just thinking about it all. A new baby, 2 surgeries, selling a house, building a house, moving in -- yikes! Plus, it is all so uncertain -- if house is delayed on closing, if -- God forbid -- more medical issues arise with either their child or another fam member..... I realize every vacation plan has its potential "stoppers" but the odds sure seem higher for them, given the past few months. Plus -- there are risks. I cannot really say if I would want to take my resistance-compromised infant on a plane and into WDW due to risk of infection. The dr. just gave him a shot b/c with the recent surgeries he was at high risk of bacterial infection. Now maybe that would help him -- but still? I know not all shots cover all bacterial forms... Don't think I would want to deal with the Celebration docs given the complexity recently of my nephew's med history.

Every step of the way, I keep asking my SIL/BIL, Now, are you still game for this trip, because we TOTALLY understand if this isn't the right time, there WILL BE other opportunities. We just don't want them to feel like this was a hard and fast "commitment" they HAD to uphold. On the other hand, we have to word it carefully enough each time that they don't think we're pushing them out! Because everytime they have vehemently responded Oh Yes -- We're coming -- why wouldn't we be? And so I, as principle planner of this whole shabango, am left to try to piece together what ressies to make, etc.

I guess my fear is that they will be so stressed out that the "vacation" factor simply won't be there for them. And if they aren't having a good time, it's highly likely we won't either -- hence, 2 vacations down the tubola. A cancellation would be tough (my kids are SOOO excited about spending 10 days with their cousins in their favorite place in the whole world!) But a forced trip or one that does more harm than good could be worse.

I am not sure that I'm really asking anyone's suggestions on this; maybe just encouragment and prayers that this all works out? Lord knows they need the vacation -- it just seems like an AWFUL lot to handle right now. Maybe they just have a different perspective -- sort of a Calgon Moment, come heck or high water? Anyone else have that same perspective -- have you taken a trip that seemed so out of the question like you shouldn't have? Care to share stories on how that worked out?

THANKS for letting me vent a bit....

 

[ear_poppin]

Wow they certainly do seem to have a lot on there plate at this time...pixie dust it all works out for them.....

I always seemed to be moving when I went to Florida 1994,1998 and 2000!! In 2000 we were selling two houses and to buy one that was being built. I had my Mum with us who is disabled, my dad who has COPD and my Diabetic brother...we coped !!! In fact the holiday was the best thing we all needed...I look back at that time with the greatest and fondest memories...my boys loved their cousin on holiday also...

So its hard ,and things can go wrong, but I hope for this families sake they get a break and enjoy a wonderful holiday.

Good Luck

Denise

 

[wisbucky]

Wow That is a lot to deal with. If I were in thier shoes I certainly would not be going on a trip with a child who may be in danger of infection. The ordeal with the child would certainly be a red light for me as a parent to say no to this trip. But they may be looking at it differenlty thinking they need a vacation. Looking at it from your stand point I can understand your concerns. We all take vacations to enjoy them and relax. If you are already getting stressed out prior to your own vacation I would recommend having a heart to heart talk with them. Ask them what plans they have in case problems do arise. Exlain your concerns about the child. It wouldn't hurt to tell them that you are not able to back out of your vacation at the last minute without consequences, if you feel they may just do so.

Also maybe plan ahead with your SIL/BIL and decide what days that you will spend apart to be with your own families. We are taking my mom and dad (they have never been to WDW) with us next year and we have already explained to them that we will spend days apart from them. We discussed this with them in detail and they understood our reasoning for it. We dont want to ruin thier vacation nor ours. We even considered having them stay in a separate room entirely. But due to the amount of points we had this was not an option. Dont get me wrong I get along with my parents great. But everyone has a breaking point on vacations.

Prayers are with you and your family.

 

[3DisneyNUTS]

My son was born with MAJOR medical problems and we have had huge discussions with the docs about how flying would affect him yada yada so my opinion is, if their doctor says they can go and the baby is at no additional risk, it may just be what the family needs to feel sane. If they have the AOK then I would go on with plans as usual and no longer ask them if they are going. If they are enthusiastically replying yes it is ok to assume that they have spoken with the baby's specialist and they have the go ahead. Sometimes when children have major health issues it is better for the family to act as "normal" as possible not only to relieve stress but to ensure the baby has as much as a typical baby experience as possible. How sad would they all be, including the baby, if they always had to cancel vacations or never plan any. So trust me on this if they say they are going with repeated offers to back out I would think that it will all work out ok. It will probably be one of the best vacations yet and how awesome that the baby got to create his own Disney memories already

 

[manning]

Just had a situation like that. Our neice became pregnant and it is a high risk one. We ended up cancelling.

She was feeling guilty about the possibility of cancelling and was inclined not to. We sat her down and told her in no uncertain terms that we would not feel badly at all if she did. We can go next year and get to show Disney off to the new little one even though he will be sleeping through it all. Just do what the doctor thinks is best.

So next May here we come!

 

[DrTomorrow]

This doesn't begin to compare with medical issues, but we did experience the sell/move thing. We made our first SSR plans last Dec, when May 22-28 2004 seemed like a quiet time of year. But in the middle of March, we up and decided to move to Arizona! Put the condo up for sale and started boxing up 40 years of life. We arrived in Phoenix on May 2 (6 weeks after saying "Yep, let's move") and the moving van arrived on the 13th - and we flew to WDW one week later.

Yes, it was crazy, but we were still looking forward to it. No matter how nutsy / stressful / grim everyday life is, for most people, a get-away to WDW is an enjoyable break.

Best of luck to all!

 

[mousefansmom]

They probably need a vacation pretty badly. I think that part of my "addiction" to Disney is because that is where we went when we needed a vacation the most. I equate it with "low stress levels." When our son was 6 months old, he was shaken and beaten at his daycare. He had a severe brain injury and broken bones. Although we had checked the daycare out thoroughly, we just happened to get a provider that flipped out one day. We had just signed the contract to build a new home, closer to the daycare, because we had loved it so much. Believe me, I understand the stress that your family members are going through. Due to the parameters of the contract, we had to break ground on our new house the same week that the daycare provider was on trial. The entire thing, from diagnosis, until sentencing took over a year and a half. We went to Disney and on the four day cruise shortly after, and I have never felt such relief at just "getting away from it all". There is a ton more to our story, and it reads like a very bad movie, so I won't bore you. Just suffice it to say that when you go through the difficulty of seeing a child, your child, be critically ill, you just want to do ANYTHING to make it better. Anything. And if Disney will do this for them, and the doctor says it's a "go" respect that. One of the hardest parts for us was that people were always second guessing how much WE could handle. We saw it as coping. The distractions helped us to filter the pain, and deal with it little by little when we could.
Sorry for the length, hope this lends a different perspective.
Mousefansmom
(PS, my 2 yo. was born with an immune deficiency. On our trip in January, she did end up in the hospital, but we still managed to make the best of it, and enjoy what we could!)

Originally posted by gopherit
We will be heading to WDW later this summer and per usual are bringing family along. However -- the family members we are bringing have been beseiged by one thing after another. Their child born last winter had a congenital defect that required surgery. THen surgery again most recently. THen a close relative had a heart attack (and they will be the family nearest so hence have assisted this family member while he rehabs). Furthermore, they have bitten off quite a bit to chew, even without these issues. THey just sold their house and are building a new one -- which they plan to move into 2 weeks before the trip. Wow. My head spins just thinking about it all. A new baby, 2 surgeries, selling a house, building a house, moving in -- yikes! Plus, it is all so uncertain -- if house is delayed on closing, if -- God forbid -- more medical issues arise with either their child or another fam member..... I realize every vacation plan has its potential "stoppers" but the odds sure seem higher for them, given the past few months. Plus -- there are risks. I cannot really say if I would want to take my resistance-compromised infant on a plane and into WDW due to risk of infection. The dr. just gave him a shot b/c with the recent surgeries he was at high risk of bacterial infection. Now maybe that would help him -- but still? I know not all shots cover all bacterial forms... Don't think I would want to deal with the Celebration docs given the complexity recently of my nephew's med history.

Every step of the way, I keep asking my SIL/BIL, Now, are you still game for this trip, because we TOTALLY understand if this isn't the right time, there WILL BE other opportunities. We just don't want them to feel like this was a hard and fast "commitment" they HAD to uphold. On the other hand, we have to word it carefully enough each time that they don't think we're pushing them out! Because everytime they have vehemently responded Oh Yes -- We're coming -- why wouldn't we be? And so I, as principle planner of this whole shabango, am left to try to piece together what ressies to make, etc.

I guess my fear is that they will be so stressed out that the "vacation" factor simply won't be there for them. And if they aren't having a good time, it's highly likely we won't either -- hence, 2 vacations down the tubola. A cancellation would be tough (my kids are SOOO excited about spending 10 days with their cousins in their favorite place in the whole world!) But a forced trip or one that does more harm than good could be worse.

I am not sure that I'm really asking anyone's suggestions on this; maybe just encouragment and prayers that this all works out? Lord knows they need the vacation -- it just seems like an AWFUL lot to handle right now. Maybe they just have a different perspective -- sort of a Calgon Moment, come heck or high water? Anyone else have that same perspective -- have you taken a trip that seemed so out of the question like you shouldn't have? Care to share stories on how that worked out?

THANKS for letting me vent a bit....

 

[3DisneyNUTS]

I am so sorry for what you have been through and yes I completely understand what you are saying . My son was born with a severe brain injury and his docs encouraged us to go to WDW to get away from it all up here. It is good to do things like this so the family can heal.

This may be what your family members need gopherit since they may need to just get away from the stress of real life.