Useless facts/Chit Chat Thread

[chiefcop]

The Top 10 Things Not to Say to a Cop

10. "Aren't you the guy from the Village People?"

9. "Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does."

8. "I pay your salary!"

7. "I thought you had to be in _relatively good_ physical condition to be a police officer."

6. "You're not going to check the trunk, are you?"

5. "Hey, you must have been doing 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!"

4. "I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer."

3. "Gee, officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too."

2. "I was trying to keep up with traffic...Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are."

1. "Sorry, officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in."

 

[chiefcop]

The Top 10 Things Not to Say to a Cop

10. "Aren't you the guy from the Village People?"

9. "Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does."

8. "I pay your salary!"

7. "I thought you had to be in _relatively good_ physical condition to be a police officer."

6. "You're not going to check the trunk, are you?"

5. "Hey, you must have been doing 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!"

4. "I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer."

3. "Gee, officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too."

2. "I was trying to keep up with traffic...Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are."

1. "Sorry, officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in."

I forgot this one: When the Officer says "Gee Son...Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?' You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyes looked glazed, have you been eating donuts?

Now it's the Top 11 Things to Not Say to a cop...

 

[PolynesianPixie]

 

[Born 2 Fish]

To approximate the concentration of a solution of DNA in nanograms per microliter, measure the absorbance at a wavelength of 260 nanometers and multiply by 50.

 

[Gatordad]

I forgot this one: When the Officer says "Gee Son...Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?' You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyes looked glazed, have you been eating donuts?

Now it's the Top 11 Things to Not Say to a cop...

thanks a lot, that didn't work at all....... now i'm being held in contempt.

 

[Born 2 Fish]

On a cold day, soaking wet blue jeans will draw heat from your lower body twice as fast as wearing no pants at all

 

[Born 2 Fish]

You can live three seconds without blood, three minutes without air, three days without water, and three weeks without food.

I have not tried any of these, so i can't say if it's true or not



I have however, done the soaking wet pants thingy in the cold, thats true. And no I'm not gonna talk about it.

 

[chiefcop]

thanks a lot, that didn't work at all....... now i'm being held in contempt.

Here's another way to be held in contempt. When the judge asks "Do you swear" interrupt him by saying "No but I know ALL the words..."

 

[BigDaddyRog]

If I didnt have to go to stupid work.....I could be camping right now!!! I hate the way employment completely gets in the way of living!!

 

[chiefcop]

If you run out of sick days at work just call in dead... Of course you can only do this once.

 

[2goofycampers]

If I didnt have to go to stupid work.....I could be camping right now!!! I hate the way employment completely gets in the way of living!!

Only thing worse than employment is unemployment. With one you have the $, but no time and with the other you have the time but not the $.

 

[clkelley]

All good points!!!

 

[Gatordad]

Here's another way to be held in contempt. When the judge asks "Do you swear" interrupt him by saying "No but I know ALL the words..."

now that is a good one.... i'm going to get arrested just so i can try it.

 

[AuburnJen92]

I thought you said you were already in contempt?

 

[ntsammy5]

I thought you said you were already in contempt?

No, I think he said he's contemptible

 

[AuburnJen92]

thanks a lot, that didn't work at all....... now i'm being held in contempt.

No, I think he said he's contemptible

ok, you're right....

 

[kc5grw]

If I didnt have to go to stupid work.....I could be camping right now!!! I hate the way employment completely gets in the way of living!!

Ain't that the truth. I could be having a helluva lot more fun if I didn't have to go to work to get a paycheck. Funny how employers nowadays think they deserve some sort of productivity in return for that paycheck.

 

[kc5grw]

Wooohoooo!!!!! 73 months after joining the Disboards I finally hit 1000 posts!!!!!!!

 

[AuburnJen92]

Wooohoooo!!!!! 73 months after joining the Disboards I finally hit 1000 posts!!!!!!!

Well congratumulations, 70 months late!

 

[ntsammy5]

Are you trying to say you have a life?