twisted wishes

[Bbgrizzle]

I wish the laundry was done.

Here you go:

I always wondered if I'd ever have a use for that smilie!

Okay, for real:

Granted, but all your clothes shrunk to the size of Barbie clothes.

I wish I had new furniture.

 

[Kimmielee]

Granted, but all your clothes shrunk to the size of Barbie clothes.

I wish I had new furniture.

Granted but it's made out of stone.

I wish I had the same body I had at 21.

 

[arkansas mom]

Granted but it's made out of stone.

I wish I had the same body I had at 21.

Granted. But you get the same wisdom you had a 21 too.

I wish DS hadn't puked at church a while ago.

 

[fabumouse]

Granted. But you get the same wisdom you had a 21 too.

I wish DS hadn't puked at church a while ago.

Granted. He made it all the way to your car before he puked.

I wish my dermatologist hadn't scarred my arm when removing a wart last month.

 

[CF'er]

Granted.
But now you still have the wart and it's spread to places where you don't want warts.

I wish Tony or Jr. would win tonights race.

 

[arkansas mom]

Granted. One of them did. But you'll never know which one.
I wish I looked like Julia Roberts.

 

[CourtasanSatine]

Granted but you will be chased by nuts with cameras all the time

 

[jaycns]

Granted...but you are always dressed in the clothes she wore at the START of Pretty Woman.

I wish I was on a tropical island drinking something icey!!

 

[Steamboat Marti]

Granted -- but William Hung has left his wife to go to the tropical island with you to sing "She Bangs" until you beg for mercy.

I wish I weren't addicted to the DIS...

 

[jaycns]

Granted...but now you are SO out of the loop in planning your Disney vacations!!

I wish I had a plate full of peel and eat shrimp right now!

 

[Steamboat Marti]

Granted... but at this exact time you find out you have suddenly become allergic to all shell fish...

I wish I could fall asleep easier and quicker...

 

[Bbgrizzle]

Granted, but now you have narcolepsy and fall asleep at the most inopportune times.

I wish my 3 DD's were a little more obedient.

 

[fabumouse]

Granted. But now Jo Frost (Supernanny) refuses to move out of your guest room.

I wish my basement didn't have a mildew problem.

 

[CF'er]

Granted. But now your entire extended family has moved into the basement and refuses to leave.

I wish dinner was already planned and cooking.

 

[Bbgrizzle]

I wish dinner was already planned and cooking.

Granted, you are having roast and it's already crocking in the crockpot. However, tonight when you dine, you'll discover that a big dung beatle got crocked up with it.

I wish I could go back in time to the Victorian era.

 

[slo]

But you would be really hot in those huge dresses they had to wear.

I wish I had a maid to clean my house.

 

[Mish19]

Granted - But she's used furniture polish and turpentine to wash your hardwood floors.

I wish I was able to get July 3rd off from work.

 

[slo]

Granted, but then you would have to be there super early on July 4th.

I wish my sunburn didn't hurt

 

[fabumouse]

Granted. But that igloo is becoming *mighty* chilly.

I wish my desk was cleaned off.

 

[Miranda Danda]

Granted. But that igloo is becoming *mighty* chilly.

I wish my desk was cleaned off.

Granted- but now you can't find anything because it was the crazy bag-lady who cleaned off your desk

I wish I was eating some food right now instead of being at work.