Trouble with explaining my sadness.

Discussion in 'The DIS Unplugged Podcast' started by peacelovemickey, Apr 29, 2008.

  1. peacelovemickey

    peacelovemickey <font color=deepink>I followed the directions step

    Feb 18, 2006
    Anyone else having trouble with explaining why you are so sad over the loss of someone you never met? My DH tried to understand, but I could tell he didn't really "get it." I guess Bob always came across as such a "real" person over the podcast. i know for me the Podcast is like a weekly visit with friends. I hope the team is doing OK! Am I even making any sense?
  2. kimbac3

    kimbac3 <img src="

    Jul 29, 2003
    Yes, you are making sense. I'm in the same boat. Interestingly enough the only one that really "got it" was my DD9. I could tell she was upset and understood why I was.

    At least we can "talk" to each other! :hug:

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  4. DVC Kathy

    DVC Kathy Mouseketeer

    May 22, 2003
    I so understand. My DH gets it, but there's no way I can explain why I'm sitting at my desk with tears in my eyes to my coworkers.

    At least we have one another.

  5. ms*mountaineer

    ms*mountaineer DIS Veteran

    Aug 7, 2007
    same here!
  6. amyhughes

    amyhughes <img src=

    Aug 15, 2007
    Don't think you are nuts. I called my DH crying last night, he thought one of the kids was hurt. I bounced this exact thought off him during our phone conversation and this is what he replied with: "It was someone you never knew, but you were in communication with. It's totally understood that you would feel upset. You feel like you know him, and it's ok to cry about it. You don't have to have met someone to feel sadness at their passing."

    I thought that summed it up well. It also made me feel not quite so out there.
  7. WaltD4Me

    WaltD4Me <font color=royalblue>PS...I tried asking for wate

    Apr 22, 2003
    I completely understand. Being so sad over someone you never met, but felt like you knew so well. I was trying to explain to my mom this morning...who has never listened to a Podcast and I could tell she didn't quite understand.

    I am going on a short trip today and I almost don't even want to go, I'm so sad over Bob's passing and I never met him....a true testament to Bob though. Just shows how he touched us all.
  8. BeamsofLight

    BeamsofLight <font color=darkorchid>One of the 'They' in 'They

    Apr 22, 2004
    It's comforting to know there are so many of us in the same boat. My husband and friends 'get' that I'm sad but I don't think they quite get why I'm as sad as I am. What a wonderful person Bawb was, that he touched so many hearts so deeply. :grouphug:
  9. gomomgo

    gomomgo Mouseketeer

    Mar 4, 2006
    I'm right there with you.

    Two weeks ago a local ball player/analyst (John Marzano) died and my husband was really effected by it. He was well regarded in the community and my DH was glued to the Internet & TV. Well, I was just trying to get the kids to bed and I asked him to join us in real life and stop spending time on someone he didn't even know.

    Unfortunately, now I get it. I fell real sadness and loss and I didn't even know Bob.

    The whole team feels like friends you catch up with once or twice a week.
  10. Madi100

    Madi100 DIS Veteran

    Apr 25, 2000
    I'm so glad someone else said that. I just read it this morning. And, I've got a lot of friends that know how attached I am to the podcast. I called my DH this morning at work. He is a man of little words. But, I told him how sad it is, and how sad it has made me, and I can't really tell anyone, because no one would really understand. And, he told me it is very sad and that I listen to him share his life with me every week, and I've grown attached.
  11. msteddom

    msteddom We always wait in line in California (something)

    May 23, 2003
    I called the only other person in my life who "knew" Bob, my Dad. His reaction was similar to mine, which let me know that I wasn't too far off base. Anyone else would think I was insane for mourning someone I've never met. It sounds like we're all feeling something similar. :grouphug:

  12. hanco005

    hanco005 Mouseketeer

    Nov 10, 2000
    I agree. I have been a lurker here for 8 years, only posted a handful of times, but listen to the podcast regularly. Through the podcast, I feel like I knew him. Even though he was teased a lot by the crew (playfully), you always knew that he was a very big part of their lives and that they truly cared for him. I can only imagine the pain that they feel.

    I know it would be painful to put together, but I hope there is some sort of "Best of Bawb" episode (or episodes as there is so much material) in the future as it might help everyone remember the good times and help with the grieving process.
  13. SamSam


    Jan 21, 2001
    I'm glad you posted this. My husband is tryiing but he really doesn't get it. Each time I listened to the Podcast, I felt like I was in the company of good friends and now one of them is gone.
  14. saturday97

    saturday97 <font color=blue>Illegally Blonde<br><font color=d

    Mar 30, 2002
    We develop relationships with "online friends" that can be just as strong as our face-to-face relationships. The podcast is very meaningful to many of us. I personally consider it a significant part of my social life. And Bob really represented the kind of joy we all take in Disney. It's ok to mourn the loss of someone important, even if that person didn't know you. Even if no one else understands your loss, give your self permission to grieve. :hug:
  15. rlduvall

    rlduvall DIS Veteran

    May 7, 2002
    I am so glad someone else posted this. I am having the same feelings. When I first saw it last night, my heart dropped and I began trembling. Then I began to cry and cry and cry. I cried all night and have swollen eyes today. I tried to explain it to my DH when he came home and saw me so upset. His initial reaction was "You are this upset over someone you never met?" He finally "got it" a little, but still thought it odd I was so upset. I think the fact that I lost my beloved mother to a terminal illness in December and only by listening to the Podcast Team (going back and forth from her home helping to care for her) was I able to maintain a "normal" balance to my life making me feel "closer" to the Podcast Team.

    I have never reacted this way to anyone's death I didn't know personally. Bob seemed like such a lovely man . . .

    I'm booked for the Podcast Cruise and don't even want to go anymore. I can only imagine how sad the Team must be right now. It will not and cannot be the same without him. I truly can see them disbanding the Podcast.

    I have been listening to old podcasts (for the 2nd time) and don't even want to do that anymore. :sad1:
  16. ericafny

    ericafny <font color=purple>OK, I am a real Harry Potter ge

    Mar 6, 2005
    I also had a hard time explaining it to my DBF. He understood, but I still feel like I can't talk to him about it because I don't think he really understands. I keep thinking about Diana and Brian and Pete, Corey, Julie, Kevin & John. I can't even imagine the pain they are in.

    I still haven't finished listening to the 4/22 podcast and I don't even know if I can bring myself to do it...:sad1:
  17. WebmasterMaryJo

    WebmasterMaryJo Techarita Administrator

    Dec 15, 1998
    I think this is relatively new, this getting to know people virtually. Because we listen to the Podcast from home, from work, in our cars, or walking around, we hear the voices. We listen to roundtable, and get to know the people talking a little more. The Podcast team aren't actors, they are real people sharing their lives with us. So we listen... and we come to care.

    This has happened here on the DIS with threads about people going through rough times and terminal illnesses. I've cried tears for people I've only met through written text. However, when you put yourself out there, sharing your life ---- well, people care.

    I think it is probably even more with the Podcast. It's not just words on the screen, but their voices and personalities come through ... and we hear how they care for each other ... well, I think it's natural that people who listen, especially on a weekly basis, will also feel connected to the Podcast team. They may be speaking to each other, but they are really speaking to the listeners -- and that is all of us.

    Bob, has been such an integral part of the team, and with his personality I think helped bond this board even more to the Podcast team. This group has something special.

    At first, I just listened to the Podcast, but then I started wondering stuff like, who is this Anthony they keep shouting out to? And these emails? Who is writing them? Because of the Podcast I started lurking on this board, and have enjoyed watching all of you become friends.

    It's only natural to really feel the loss of our Bawb, and though other people may not get it (yet), the important thing is we all do.

  18. MD DisneyFreaks

    MD DisneyFreaks Mouseketeer

    Apr 25, 2007
    I understand your sorrow and sadness, but there is now way that Bob would want the Podcast to stop. Look at the legacy he's left and how many people he's touched. It would be a shame to stop that and cheat thousands of people out of being a part of this amazing community. I know that Bob would want the crew to continue without difficult as that will be.
  19. PlutoGirl1117

    PlutoGirl1117 DIS Veteran

    Mar 8, 2007
    I understand what you are saying. I feel even a bit more out of place as, as you can see from my post count, I was more of a lurker! So I didn't even have the communication on the boards, but! I am terribly sad at his passing. Even my husband who listened sometimes was shocked. I couldn't help but cry when I read Pete's post! I had to reread it and reread it.
  20. LilGMom

    LilGMom <font color=red>It makes me want to Kiss on the li

    Feb 6, 2006
    You are not the only one.

    I think because of the Podcast crew sharing so much and basically inviting us into their lives and us making them a part of our lives we have grown attached (in a nonstalker type way) to all of them. When one of them experiences something we all experience it on some level. My DH, while he is a DIS member and Disney lover, has never listened to the Podcast and didn't understand why I got so sad last night over the news about Bob.

    My heart breaks for the Varley family and the Podcast Family.
  21. Pinky166

    Pinky166 <font color=deeppink>a little on the OCD side<br><

    Feb 6, 2008
    I agree with you all....because of the time difference (i'm in the UK) I read Pete's post last night just as I was getting ready to go to bed. I told my DH and he understood why I was upset but I felt like I should hide away and cry, so I shut myself in the bathroom. I have been the same today...I had to stop reading all the 'favourite Bob memories' thread earlier as I just feel so upset.

    I may have only been on the boards for 3 months but I have listened to ALL of the old podcasts - most of them more than once! I really feel as though I know each and every one of them personally and that they are close friends as they give so much of themselves to us and the shows.

    My love to Bob's family, the podcast crew and all my fellow DISers on this sad day. :grouphug:

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