This is just so sad,,and makes me ask WHY would someone do this?? I don't call it 'playing'??

Pea-n-Me

DIS Veteran
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Jul 18, 2004
I don't know about other places but where DH and I work if we use FMLA because we're sick, we get paid. If we take FMLA time for any other reason it is unpaid.
Good point. Where I am we have to use our own time for FMLA, but from what I understand, next year, in my state, it's being legislated that employers will have to pay employees FMLA from funds they've put aside.

I think the sibling college fund is over the top. There's no connection.
The only thing I could think of was that someone thought that perhaps they'd deplete and/or redirect a lot of their savings in dealing with all of this, but it seems pretty likely, especially when looking at their PR (Public Relations, not Puerto Rico) lawyer's credentials, that they will get a settlement from RCI, so it doesn't seem right that hardworking but caring people who may have less are funding that.
 

tzolkin

DIS Veteran
Joined
Jan 3, 2008
I don't disagree in principle, but there is really no reason for hyper-vigilance on a cruise ship, which is essentially a floating cross between a hotel and a shopping mall. There's really nothing there more inherently dangerous in and of itself.
I agree that it is like a floating hotel or mall, but from my perspective people should have increased awareness of safety in those two as well. If you are holding an infant or toddler at a balcony in a hotel or mall, you should be more cautious than if you were carrying them around your home. Yes, they can be injured anywhere, but a fall from a higher height is more likely to result in a tragic outcome than bumping into an open or closed sliding door to your back yard.


The only thing I could think of was that someone thought that perhaps they'd deplete and/or redirect a lot of their savings in dealing with all of this, but it seems pretty likely, especially when looking at their PR (Public Relations, not Puerto Rico) lawyer's credentials, that they will get a settlement from RCI, so it doesn't seem right that hardworking but caring people who may have less are funding that.
I agree with everyone's reservations about the funding campaigns. I know in some situations it is much needed, but it just seems off to me when the parents have not expressed a specific need. Not knowing anything about the situation, it's entirely possible that they won't have any expenses that they need help with. Perhaps they had trip insurance, life insurance, and either plenty of savings/paid time off/whatever that they would not incur any hardship if they take several months off from work. (Not even factoring in any possible settlement money, which is very likely.)

This isn't meant to diminish their tragedy. I'm just saying that it may not be a financial challenge on top of the emotional. I understand that people want to help, but depending on the situation, emotional support and help with day to day needs that the parents may be too stressed or grieved to deal with may be much more needed than money.

I know if it were me, I would feel very uncomfortable taking money that I did not need and I would prefer if people put their donations toward someone with greater need.
 
  • mousefanmichelle

    DIS Veteran
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    Jun 29, 2006
    It doesn't matter how this happened so much as there is a life that is lost and a grandfather who has to wake up each day and re-live those moments over and over and a daughter/SIL who have to live knowing their father/FIL was responsible for the loss of their daughter. I sincerely hope the cruise line isn't held responsible - this seems like a freak accident that happens. Its horribly tragic and I would never wish this on anyone. We can speculate all we want but we weren't there - we don't know and we should just hope this family can one day be whole again.

    I can say if it were me that I may jump over the side with that poor baby in hopes of catching her as false as that reality would have been but I could not live with myself if I were the grandpa. I hope he is one day ok.
     

    Keli

    <font color=darkcoral>We're smarter than the avera
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    Oct 27, 1999
    I don't know how much time this Indiana police officer will have but in the same situation I would get 3 paid days off for bereavement. If I signed up for FMLA (assuming my dr would recommend it and complete the paperwork) then I would have unpaid time off unless I had accrued sick or vacation time available. Most of the time I don't have a huge amount accrued so I would probably stop being paid after a week or two. But my job would be secure for several weeks.

    I often give to online fundraisers after tragedies. I just feel so badly for the family that even if they aren't suffering a financial loss from the situation I assume a little more money will help them feel free to take a few more days off work or create a memorial or maybe even an organization to help others (the mother of a young son who passed from cancer did that, her organization provides a lot of resources to families in a similar situation and it has helped her to grieve and find solace after the death of her son)
     

    Summer2018

    DIS Veteran
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    Jun 29, 2017
    Do many people get unlimited paid time off?

    My husband and I both have/had pretty good benefits with a very strong union. But for a death we only got 3 paid days off. If we wanted more time we would have to use personal/vacation days or take time off unpaid.

    My husband gets 5 weeks vacation plus 5 personal days a year. We had a busy first half of the year.He only has 6 days left for the year.
    I would probably have to take FMLA. I have enough sick time built up to stay out most of the school year.
     

    DisneyHardin

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    Jan 20, 2010
    :scratchin Would there not at least be some type of paid bereavement leave? I’d suspect in such a terrible case a short-term medical leave (stress) wouldn’t be out of the question either. Hard to know what actually applies to this family though because benefit plans differ. Aren't LEOs usually unionized?
    He has a good benefit package as far as a very fair number of sick/PTO days, but there is no separate pool of bereavement days. He would always be able to use FMLA to hold his job if he had to be off for an extended period of time, but it doesn't provide any pay.
     
  • mommasita

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    Aug 3, 2004
    Often people get paid sick time and could be put on paid stress leave for a month or two. Depends on the employer.

    I had two weeks paid with the loss of my daughter.
    I was on 15 month insurance sick leave, paid at 80%.
     

    ronandannette

    I gave myself this tag and I "Like" myself too!
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    May 4, 2006
    Have never heard of "paid stress leave". I do know some have used Family Leave for different situations but I don't think they actually get paid for it.


    We earn quite a few personal and medical leave days each month and they add up over the year. For funerals we are allowed to use our medical leave days rather than personal for two or three days. Past that we use personal days. When my mom died I was off two weeks. They let me use half and half. But its not unlimited.
    The only time I've heard of 'stress leave' was with my Canadian counterparts. We had people off for months for 'stress leave'.
    Stress-leave would be recommended for verified mental health reasons and requires a TON of documentation by qualified professionals. You can't just call yourself in stressed. And it's not paid for by the employer exactly, it's a very, very common part of a benefits plan and falls under the category of "short-term disability". Workers without a benefits plan can apply for "sickness benefits" through our federal Employment Insurance program.

    As I understand it, many Americans have benefit plans provided by their employers also. Do those policies not include short and/or long term disability coverage of any kind? :confused3
     
    Joined
    Oct 23, 2015
    Stress-leave would be recommended for verified mental health reasons and requires a TON of documentation by qualified professionals. You can't just call yourself in stressed. And it's not paid for by the employer exactly, it's a very, very common part of a benefits plan and falls under the category of "short-term disability". Workers without a benefits plan can apply for "sickness benefits" through our federal Employment Insurance program.

    As I understand it, many Americans have benefit plans provided by their employers also. Do those policies not include short and/or long term disability coverage of any kind? :confused3
    I don't believe Short-Term or Long-Term Disability is typically used for situations such that we are talking about. For instance my mom is presently on Short-Term Disability due to total knee replacement. You are required at the company to take 40hours of PTO though before Short-Term Disability kicks in. Also depending on state laws and your company you may not be paid 100% but instead a portion like 60-80% of your pay. Long-Term Disability is typically not 100% paid.

    If there was a death in the family she would use her 5 days she gets for Bereavement and if she needed beyond that she would use her PTO time. If she exhausts that it's possible if she's dealing with things still related to the death in the family (such as needing to take care of someone in the family) she would use FMLA which would be unpaid.

    It's possible a company could define Illness to include extreme stress and maybe a poster here who does can chime in how it works with their company but I personally don't know anyone whose Short-Term nor Long-Term is designed to be used for that.
     

    ronandannette

    I gave myself this tag and I "Like" myself too!
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    I don't believe Short-Term or Long-Term Disability is typically used for situations such that we are talking about. For instance my mom is presently on Short-Term Disability due to total knee replacement. You are required at the company to take 40hours of PTO though before Short-Term Disability kicks in. Also depending on state laws and your company you may not be paid 100% but instead a portion like 60-80% of your pay. Long-Term Disability is typically not 100% paid.

    If there was a death in the family she would use her 5 days she gets for Bereavement and if she needed beyond that she would use her PTO time. If she exhausts that it's possible if she's dealing with things still related to the death in the family (such as needing to take care of someone in the family) she would use FMLA which would be unpaid.

    It's possible a company could define Illness to include extreme stress and maybe a poster here who does can chime in how it works with their company but I personally don't know anyone whose Short-Term nor Long-Term is designed to be used for that.
    Disability coverage under my policy is valid for any reason a qualified medical professional (and reviewed by the insurance company) certifies as necessary. Disabled due to mental illness is just as disabled as the injured or ill - no? :confused3 Maybe there are some discrepancies between how (slightly) different cultures view mental health issues.
     
  • mommasita

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    Yes, for our company (very large international company); we have a good insurance package, thankfully.
    As mentioned, I was paid for 2 weeks, and then went on short term disability, and still was unable mentally and physically to work, and then it went to long term disability.
    I was not required to take any PTO. I maintained my seniority, vacation time accrued etc.
    Mental health is most definitely just as disabling. In fact I had to have not one but 2 doctors access me to return to work, I work emergency response as a telephone operator.
     
    Joined
    Oct 23, 2015
    Disability coverage under my policy is valid for any reason a qualified medical professional (and reviewed by the insurance company) certifies as necessary. Disabled due to mental illness is just as disabled as the injured or ill - no? :confused3 Maybe there are some discrepancies between how (slightly) different cultures view mental health issues.
    Employment policies here I've gathered over time are just different than in Canada.

    Only 5 states have State-Funded Short-Term Disability programs. The rest either don't or limit it to persons who are XYZ (such as income based).

    Long-Term Disability may have a wider berth of what qualifies depending on the state and/or employer but that's really just job protection in the end.

    I haven't looked up 50 states worth I'm just saying as a generality "extreme stress" would usually not fall under Short-Term and Long-Term; this obviously can vary. I guess in other words it's not a given.
     

    TeresaBelle

    <font color=magenta>Still sleeps with a security b
    Joined
    Mar 7, 2005
    It doesn't matter how this happened so much as there is a life that is lost and a grandfather who has to wake up each day and re-live those moments over and over and a daughter/SIL who have to live knowing their father/FIL was responsible for the loss of their daughter. I sincerely hope the cruise line isn't held responsible - this seems like a freak accident that happens. Its horribly tragic and I would never wish this on anyone. We can speculate all we want but we weren't there - we don't know and we should just hope this family can one day be whole again.

    I can say if it were me that I may jump over the side with that poor baby in hopes of catching her as false as that reality would have been but I could not live with myself if I were the grandpa. I hope he is one day ok.
    I thought the exact same thing. No way could I live with myself. That poor man. :guilty:
     

    lorimay

    🎃🍁🌻
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    Dec 11, 2008
    The little girls parents are going to be interviewed on The Today Show this coming Monday, sitting down with Savannah.
     

    Cubbiecakes

    Mr. Cakes
    Joined
    Sep 17, 2016
    The little girls parents are going to be interviewed on The Today Show this coming Monday, sitting down with Savannah.
    Oh, so they are trying to shame RCL for something that the GF did? Seriously, I realize that they are probably completely torn up, but this is a total DBag move and I hope it bites them in the distal end of the alimentary canal.
     
    Last edited:

    lorimay

    🎃🍁🌻
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    Oh, so they are trying to shame RCL for something that the GF did? Seriously, I realize that they are probably completely torn up, but this is a total DBag move and I hope it bite them in the ***.

    I have no idea what they are going to say.......
    We will have to watch to find out.
     

    rlk

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Dec 3, 2007
    Oh, so they are trying to shame RCL for something that the GF did? Seriously, I realize that they are probably completely torn up, but this is a total DBag move and I hope it bite them in the ***.
    I have no idea what they are going to say.......
    We will have to watch to find out.
    From the preview I saw, it looks like the parents are putting all the blame on the RCL.
     

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