The Truth about Teacher Gifts, Things NOT to Do

[MKCP5]

I think that is why OP started this thread - I know I would personally feel horrible tossing a coffee mug, or any gift given to me, but I honestly don't know where I would store the dozen or so I might get every year if I taught. I have 5 kids who buy my Christmas presents at the Holiday Boutique (dollar store stuff), and my Mother's Day gifts at the neighborhood garage sale that occurs here the weekend before. I treasure these gifts, and save them, but it is hard finding places for them. Teacher's probably have about 25 children in their classes - that's a lot of stuff!

And I'm guessing many parents would be up in arms if a letter came home, telling them what to give instead of gifts...

My kids elementary school sends a letter home specifically requesting that you NOT send teacher gifts, but instead donate to the nurses fund for families in need. I donated, and went in to help for the party and the desk was covered with gifts!!!! My DS (then in 2nd grade) was so sad that he did not have something to give You can't win!!!!!

 

[Moeluv4u7]

Wow! I am not a teacher and have never given teacher ornies, candles, mugs or homemade treats as a teacher gift BUT- I like all those things- (Other than, I understand only so many coffee mugs period , let alone teacher themed ones...) I, too, wouldn't know where to store them all- But I like the idea of donating them to Church- can be given to a needy family who has lost home to fire or such etc-
If I were a teacher and received teacher ornies every year... (I have many Christmas trees themed through the house) I would have a teacher tree! How very awesome! & You could even have it at school- Let the kids who give the ornie have the honor of putting the ornament they gave you on the tree! Many ornaments are probably great for year round classroom tree use if teachery themed-
I LOVE candles- Yankee should give me stock in their company- LOL
Love homemade treats- I am old fashioned I guess- & I feel if it is personally for "me"- the school can't dictate me keeping it or throwing it out... My two cents-
We usually get something the teachers can use- I find out a few likes, dislikes- I have given address books w/ matching pens, hat & glove sets (after seeing what type of outer wear the teachers wear), my kids when they were smaller would make a picture frame and we'd put a class photo in it (from Fall pictures)- I would help with making the frame so it would be sturdy and let my kids give their own creation, among many othergifts we have given-
I am just surprised to hear that the gifts mentioned are really not on a high list of "likes" as gifts go.
Good tips though I guess- I hope all teachers out there realize whatever the gift, it is for your dedication all year that is being appreciated-

 

[polkadotminnie]

I know one is a Dunkin Donuts fanatic, but since we are on a budget do you think a $10.00 gift card is too cheap?

That would be appreciated! I am a teacher and even a $5 gift card to McDonald's to help fuel my Diet Coke addiction would be excellent. If some one gave me that, then I would know that they really took the time to know what I like.

 

[littlele]

OK, I didn't read the whole thing but enough to get the gist...and my problem here is, with all these teachers, no one else was disturbed by the phrase, "I substitute teached"?

Oh, believe me, I was beyond disturbed when I read this, but on the other hand, this particular poster was not one that I wished to engage any further.

 

[patsal]

OK, I didn't read the whole thing but enough to get the gist...and my problem here is, with all these teachers, no one else was disturbed by the phrase, "I substitute teached"?

Very disturbing, but the grammar around here isn't always what it should be and I try not to judge too much. I read this kind of stuff daily in remedial writing so I know what was meant and move on.

 

[flying_babyb]

best gift I ever got from one of my students was a heart with a class picture. It still hangs on my wall (even though it was a christmas ordment). I also love letters from the kids and parents that let me know they think im doing a good job. A WONDERFUL question to ask your kids is " Why do you like your teacher?" I did this for a sick coworker and it was worth a good chuckle and she cried.

 

[RACHELSMOM1]

You're right. My mom was a teacher and we had a million "#1 Teacher" mugs and almost a whole tree filled with apple and school house ornaments.

Being a Christmas lover (I love, love, love decorating at Christmas) I would have appreciated the ornaments, just another excuse to add one more tree to my collection - a themed tree. I would have loved the apple and schoolhouse themed tree!! I bet your mom liked the ornaments better than you, because she didn't throw them in the trash!!

 

[flying_babyb]

Also another thought that our school does-
Make a classroom wish list and send home a letter telling parents if you want to get a gift that these would be very appreacted. I mean my coteacher was overjoyed when one mom brought us box of playdoh.

 

[RACHELSMOM1]

You know what? Next year I think I will take teachers off my list since so many of you want to dictate what someone buys you.

I bought my daughter's two teachers, special needs counselor and school nurse, baskets from B&BW with full size items...if it was so damn stinky I do not think they would be doing so well for so many years and have so many stores! I purchased Yankee candle votives in a three pack with a Christmas ornament on top and a votive holder, again, many people including myself love candles and Yankee does very good business. I bought each of them the 10-piece red and gold Godiva packages and I included a ten dollar gift certificate to Barnes and Nobles. I figured they could take a relaxing bath, light the candle, eat good chocolate and read a good paperback. I really appreciate them and all their dedication and hard work and I thought it was a thoughtful gift, not that it would be looked at as junk to be thrown away or given away.

I was excited about giving them their gift baskets, including cards of thanks and now I just feel horrible that they will hate what I purchased for them. It is the thought that counts, and for someone to have thought of you and spent their hard earned money and/or time on another person should be appreciated, not scoffed at!

I am so with everything you just wrote!! I think any gift should be appreciated!! What kind of society do we live in when it is expected of our children to give certain gifts to their teachers, and expected not to give other gifts? Have we all become so selfish to think we deserve certain gifts ( a gift is just that - a gift)? The thought that goes into choosing a gift is very personal, and whatever gift has ever come my way has always been appreciated, whatever it was. I don't understand why some people whine because they don't like a certain Christmas gift. By the way, candles can be stored in closets and drawers, they make lovely fresheners, and also in kitchen cabinets!! You can naver have too many!!

 

[MinnieForMe]

Last year I spent many hours embroidering/monograming a set of handtowels for each teacher. For the main teacher, I included a gift card. Since I could afford these presents I was able to be more generous and give gifts to more teachers/assistants etc. I think I did 18 sets of towels. I tried to pick silver or gold ribbon depending on their personalities. Now I feel like I wasted my time and should not even bother with an embroidered gift this year. I can afford to give gift cards to the main teacher but not everyone else. I've included a picture. I also gave an embroidered travel mug to a few people with a Dunkins gift card inside.

I'm saddened that it's not the thought that counts anymore!

 

[momx2]

Last year I spent many hours embroidering/monograming a set of handtowels for each teacher. For the main teacher, I included a gift card. Since I could afford these presents I was able to be more generous and give gifts to more teachers/assistants etc. I think I did 18 sets of towels. I tried to pick silver or gold ribbon depending on their personalities. Now I feel like I wasted my time and should not even bother with an embroidered gift this year. I can afford to give gift cards to the main teacher but not everyone else. I've included a picture. I also gave an embroidered travel mug to a few people with a Dunkins gift card inside.

I'm saddened that it's not the thought that counts anymore!

I'll appreciate it....you can make me one! I think they are really pretty.

 

[torinsmom]

Last year I spent many hours embroidering/monograming a set of handtowels for each teacher. For the main teacher, I included a gift card. Since I could afford these presents I was able to be more generous and give gifts to more teachers/assistants etc. I think I did 18 sets of towels. I tried to pick silver or gold ribbon depending on their personalities. Now I feel like I wasted my time and should not even bother with an embroidered gift this year. I can afford to give gift cards to the main teacher but not everyone else. I've included a picture. I also gave an embroidered travel mug to a few people with a Dunkins gift card inside.

I'm saddened that it's not the thought that counts anymore!

Wow! Those are really neat, and something everyone uses. As a teacher, I would love something like that.

I hate that anyone thinks teachers are being picky or ungrateful by stating what gifts are not really useful to them. It's not about being ungrateful; it's just that we hate to see parents spend money on things that we aren't able to use. I appreciate every gift and the thought behind them, but appreciating and using something are two different things, KWIM?

MArsha

 

[lmillercrew]

I am a single mom on a very tight budget. My little one gets special help from two different teachers and she has a student teacher. I don't know if its rude not to buy for all of them. I just simply can't buy for all of them so i am sticking to just their main teachers. I would like to acknowledge them in some way. I am sure that they understand people just can't afford to get too much. I know one is a Dunkin Donuts fanatic, but since we are on a budget do you think a $10.00 gift card is too cheap? I don't want my daughter's to be the only one in their class that doesn't give their teacher anything so we will give something, but it can't be much.

I get a $10 Coldstone gift card for my DD teacher. It's a dessert date on you! Books are another great idea. Last year I made my DD teacher a gift basket with a fleece blanket, fuzzy socks and hot chocolate.

 

[a*n*w]

So, I just realized this is a long post...sorry!
I am a Speech Therapist in a school and I rarely receive (and do not expect) gifts from my students. When I have received them I have appreciated them tremendously! I will tell you about 3 of my favorites:
1. Another SLP and I shared an office and one of my students gave us a glass turtle candle holder (with no candle) to share as our Christmas present. She no doubt got the item at a garage sale or dollar store but we treasured it...it came from her...obviously her mother had not picked it out! We put a candle in it and kept it on our shared shelf all year (we actually had to discuss who got to keep it when I left the district!)
2. One of my students with autism gave me a small plastic heart that lights up for Christmas last year. He was incredibly proud of it and insisted that I turn it on and leave it on a certain spot on my desk. He looked for it everytime he came in the room and it became a special bond between us. Again, I know his mother had no part in this gift (he probably stole it from his sister's room!) but it was from him. So special!
3. I got a Halloween pack of peanuts! One of my little guys felt terrible for me since I had no gifts on my desk like the other teachers. He went and asked his teacher if he could have something from the treasure chest for me!

So, my point is...I think any teacher would love something thoughtful from the student!

OTOH...I am a mom and cannot count on my DD and DS to magically become thoughtful! In that vain, my brother got me the COOLEST gift last year and I think any teacher would love it. There is a website called donorschoose.org. Teachers can go on the website and write a request for a grant (usually small amounts) for items they need that their school does not have funds for. You can send the $$$ to the website and give the donation as a gift to someone else. The recipient (whomever you give it to) gets to choose what they want the $$$ to be used for. I found an SLP's request and was able to fund a portion of the request. Once it was fully funded I received a package in the mail from donorschoose.org that included thank you cards from the SLP and some of her students and pictures of them using the items! How rewarding! I think any teacher would love this gift...I know I did!

 

[TwinMommy2-3]

Amazing how different people can read the same threads, and get such different opinions. Please copy and paste the unkind manner articulated by the teachers. What I've learned is that the majority of teachers don't want gifts, would much prefer handmade cards or nice letters from the parents, or classroom supplies, and although they truly appreciate the gifts they receive, if parents really feel the need to give them gifts, to steer away from items that might never be used. BTW, although gc's may be an thoughtless gift, IMHO, there is no more generic gift than a candle.

I also think a good portion of the parents here buy gc's, and are not insulted. On the other hand, I think the few who purchased body lotion, ornaments, mugs, and candles in the past, are getting their panties in a bunch!

ITA! As one of the BBW lotion givers I am happy this thread was started. I usually have no clue as to what I should give my ds7's teacher and he really enjoys giving a gift. It's usually so hard for me to know what a teacher likes, especially when I was working and not able to volunteer much of my time. My son's teacher did mention at the beginning of the year that she is passionate about reading so we will be purchasing her a book store gift card this year. Last year my son told me he HAD to buy his teacher a candle because she just LOVES candles. We bought her one for Thanksgiving and I explained why he wanted to get her the candle so badly. She then told me one of her students had brought her a candle and she had gushed over it and that's why he got the impression that she loved candles so much. I guess after she got that candle all the rest of the kids were bringing her candles. I got the impression she was a little overwhelmed with all of these candles pouring in

Thanks OP for starting this thread and I know there was no selfish intent. This was very helpful to me.

 

[Bopsmom]

It seems like teachers are getting painted with a pretty broad brush here.
There are always some ungrateful people in this world. I could tell some SIL stories......
I thought this was going to be an informative thread and give insight to some cool new ideas on what to give this year. There have been some good ideas but, mostly it seems like bashing.

Does everyone check up on all their gift recipients to make sure the gift is being used and appreciated?? Did you love every gift you have ever received?

IMO if you don't think your gift is going to be appreciated, then don't give one.

My school has very wealthy families and very, very poor families. I actually hate the day before the holidays. I know that many of my kids can't afford to give gifts and they have 7 classes to go to that day-without a gift for the teacher. Others students are able to give very expensive gifts to everyone.

The only time I EVER mentioned something as a gift was to tell my students I really needed coupons! Coupons for "a morning or afternoon of paper stapling, book stacking, erasing my boards, helping me carry stuff to my car" etc. You should have seen the looks on some of their faces-that was something they could make/do without costing $$.

If you are already prejudging the teacher's reaction to your particular gift, then why are you giving them one? I thought parents gave gifts to show they appreciate the time and effort the teacher takes with their children every day. I KNOW the kids gifts are from the heart and that they appreciate you.

I've had kids give me so many things over the years from my retainer Christmas ornament to sharing a candy bar(I'm allergic to chocolate BTW) and I loved each one because it came from them.

Trust me, I didn't get into teaching thinking about all the things I'd get for Christmas and after reading this thread, I will never accept a gift again without thinking that it might being given begrudgingly or that the parent has decided ahead of time that I am ungrateful.

 

[JackJack08]

I'm going to be honest and hope I don't get any flames...

I'm a teacher, and I personally find it a bit condescending to think that we should be able to pick and choose what people give as gifts (from the goodness of their hearts, might I add).

Maybe it is where I teach (low income school), but I have received very few gifts from students, and I certainly don't expect anything. Those that I have received, I cherish. If its something I can't or won't eat, I share with co-workers who can or will. If its a trinket that I wouldn't normally use (like a mug, for example), I display it on my desk as a pencil holder...there are ways to find uses for things if you try. I'd love a nice candle, gift card, or a note of thanks.

I try to choose gifts for my children's teachers that I think they will appreciate, and it offends me to think that my gifts may have been ones shoved into closets to put out at the yard sale.

I'm apparantly one of the odd ones out of this subject, but I had to reply. If nothing else, at least people who read this thread will know that not all teachers are so picky about what they receive.

Oh bless your heart!! I was starting to get a little worried, about some of the posts on this thread!! You have renewed my faith.
In my opinion...you take what you get. Don't forget, you are getting PAID to teach, so anything, that is given to a teacher, is just a bonus. Of course most teachers would like to get gift cards. Don't most of us like to pick out our own "stuff"? But come on...once we start being so bold, as to dictate, what a 6 year old wants to give his/her teacher. Hmmm.....that just doesn't sit too well with me.
On a side note....my cousin, a teacher, last year got her best Christmas gift, after 30+ years of teaching. A little guy in her grade 1 class........brought her a 1/2 used lipstick!! We all laughed and thought it was so sweet of him. He probably thought long and hard about it. Of course, she gave it back to Mom, just incase she was missing it!! Mom, didn't even know he had given it to her. She was so embarassed. We all thought it was so thoughtful.

 

[allison443]

I thought this was going to be an informative thread and give insight to some cool new ideas on what to give this year. There have been some good ideas but, mostly it seems like bashing.

I think it was unfortunate that the thread was titled "the truth about teachers' gifts-what NOT to do." There were several posts about how gifts were thrown in the garbage, and how home baked gifts would automatically be tossed in the trash as well. I think some of the good suggestions (like donating to a food pantry, etc.) got lost in all the negativity towards Yankee Candle and the horror that someone would give Bath and Body works soap One post even mentioned derisively that the soap was probably purchased at the 5 for $10 sale. and another mentioned a parent purchasing a gift at a BOGO sale.

 

[SereneOne]

I can't think of one scenario why someone wouldn't like a gift card. Anyone want to clue me in? I always do a big box store like Target or Walmart. If nothing else, they can pick up a box of cereal and a gallon of milk on me. Hey, it's less they have to pay for! Why wouldn't you like a gift card? I don't want to offend anyone, seriously.

You are not offending me, I LIKE GIFT CARDS


My mom does not like them. She thinks if someone truly cares about you, they would take the time to know you and know what you like and pick something out accordingly. Maybe it is a generational thing? She is in her sixties. I also know of a friend of hers who feels the same. I am thinking back in their day there where not many gift certificates.(She also does not like email. She says if someone is your friend, they should take the time to hand write a nice letter...maybe my mom is Emily Post in disguise )

 

[SereneOne]

Amazing how different people can read the same threads, and get such different opinions. Please copy and paste the unkind manner articulated by the teachers. What I've learned is that the majority of teachers don't want gifts, would much prefer handmade cards or nice letters from the parents, or classroom supplies, and although they truly appreciate the gifts they receive, if parents really feel the need to give them gifts, to steer away from items that might never be used. BTW, although gc's may be an thoughtless gift, IMHO, there is no more generic gift than a candle.

I also think a good portion of the parents here buy gc's, and are not insulted. On the other hand, I think the few who purchased body lotion, ornaments, mugs, and candles in the past, are getting their panties in a bunch!

I think the only one getting their panties in a bunch is you. You are the one coming on the thread and mocking people. Actions speak loudly. Let's see several people did something thoughtful with the little they had because they appreciate the hard work that many teachers do. Then they read post after post that the gift is not good enough. That is disheartening when someone's goal is to show albeit in a small way their thankfulness in what you do. Several people posted that and you find the fact that they feel badly about something as something to make fun of, again actions speak loudly. If I did not know better I would think you where a troll...a certain type of troll...hmmm....