They have a tough road before them, frought with danger and heartbreak to be sure. BUT, others have gone before them and made it out the other side. I encourage them to seek out preemie parenting support, online I belong to Yahoo Groups Preemie-List
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/preemie-list/
OK, now brain bleeds (IVH, Intra Ventricular Hemhorage) are pretty common in the micro-preemie population, and grade 3/4 can be quite serious. My son had bilateral grade 2 IVH (bleeds) -- he has mild cerebral palsy, he is ambulatory, wears leg braces, gets physical therapy, has a "funny" gait and does not have the same balance, strength, stability or stamina of same age peers. His CP is likely due to the brain bleeds, but could have been caused by simply by his premature birth.
Just because of these babies gestational age, there is a chance that not all of them will make it home, and if they survive they are at increased risk of disability. Obviously, this couple needs to be talking with their babies' doctors for specific info about their kids prognosis. The thing is, while statistics can help you see probability & chances, they cannot predict a specific outcome for a specific child. There are preemies with grade 4 bleeds that have only the most minor impacts from them & preemies whose scans were declared "clean" that bear major disability -- there is no way to tell at this point. Babies brains are still very plastic and even when damaged (as with a bleed) can recover to what extent is unpredictable. If your friends are spiritual people, prayer may help, or least help the parents to feel supported.
I'm sorry it's not all rosy & cheery. And the mom may be a wreck for a while. When my first son was born (at 26 1/2 weeks) for about the first 3/4 weeks I was walking & talking and *appeared* to be coping, I was probably in shock. I would get in my car alone & drive & cry. It took me a couple of years to get over feeling guilty that my body failed or that I did this to my child -- talking & writing about it and getting validation from other moms that have been there were crucial, and why I think the parents seeking support groups when they are ready is important.
Also this couple is very nearly walking through hell right now. I remember describing it (having a child critically ill in the NICU) as ripping out your own heart and watching it struggle to breathe & live in the warming tray before you. They have it X 3. Even if they have a strong marriage -- men & women process & cope differently, this experience could rip them apart & stress their marriage to the breaking point. It's important for them to remember to connect and really be with and hear their partner.
I know the mom is not ready to hear it yet, but she did the best she could. With trips she was nearly assured of delivering early, of course she would have like to have made it further than she did, but she had the appropriate medical care, she wasn't being reckless -- IT WASN'T HER FAULT. Had it been a single 6 pound baby & not 3 2 pound babies all would have been well. I really feel for your friends. I do. Even though my older son is 6 1/2 now, I can relive all the old fears & anxiety -- it all comes flooding back in an instant. If there is anything I can do (from a distance) let me know.