The Meanest Mother in the World--A L-B TR, 5/05 *DONE. p.65, with one last pic*

[mmmcq]

Wow, you are a tease.........where's the beef?

(That slogan kind of dates me, doesn't it? Do you remember the grandmother in that ad?)

 

[Angelrose]

I remember her quite well as well as the commercial. Her name was Clara Pellar.

 

[mmmcq]

Ah Clara...thanks for saving me. How could I forget. One of the best all time commercials.

 

[Beana9802]

Ah Clara...thanks for saving me. How could I forget. One of the best all time commercials.

My cousins had the game "Where's the Beef?" I don't remember how to play, does anyone else remember that?

 

[teresajoy]

Guess what I did all day? Yep, I read the "Best Trip Report Ever!" I loved it! There was a tense moment in our house though, when I got up for a potty break, and my dh got online, and lost my spot! It took me 5 minutes to figure out where I was!

We must have been at Disney the same time, we were there that week too.

Your kids are absolutely adorable!

 

[Grammyof2]

So exactly where are we in the list

Is the last day over, mid day break or are you working on your Friday edition

 

[teresajoy]

Thanks also for the wonderful description of the Whispering Canyon Cafe. My husband had talked about wanting to do the Hoop De Doo review in May. I did some calculations and figured that it would cost us around $200. So, armed with your TR, I started talking up the WCC as a much funner and cheaper alternative. When I showed the family the picture of Ricky with the chocolate all over his face, and the description you wrote, they were sold! Thanks for saving us at least $100!!!!

 

[pumba]

so in reality we have to be on the look out for that Dang ME bus to take us back to the airport.......I would hate to miss a plane ..(well maybe not).....because of ME......thanks for the heads up and good report

 

[Turtle]

What are we waiting for? More please, O Mean One.

 

[kpk89]

Especially given that we're really on the downhill slide. When last we met, the kpKrew was waiting and waiting for a bus to whisk us away from all this magic and back to our ordinary lives in a little cow town.

It was time for action. I inquired with a young cast member named Shannon at the bell services kiosk at the bus stop. I don't exactly know why I thought she would be able to make our bus appear, but there wasn't much else to do, as I didn't want to leave the bus stop in case the bus suddenly showed up.

The very helpful, but ultimately ineffective through no fault of her own, Shannon called Magical Express, and they told her that we were due to be picked up at 5:10 PM. She had our pickup letter in her hand and told the DME person that it said 3:40 PM. They had no explanation as to how this could have happened and reiterated that pickup was at 5:10.

At this point, tears are starting to well up. It is so sad to be leaving, and so disappointing that our final day hasn't gone as planned. And now we have yet another hour to wait. A long time to wait, but not long enough to ... well, do anything but wait. I wouldn't wait for an hour to ride our most favorite ride. So the prospect of waiting that long for the bus that was to spirit us away from our magical vacation was wholly disheartening.

Shannon could see how upset we were (read: how upset *I* was ... the rest of the fam was blissfully unaware.) I retreated into my own personal fog, trying not to freak out about this unfortunate turn of events. After all, we had had the best time ever! The surprise went off grandly, we had enjoyed sunshiney days and peaceful, though early evenings. No meltdowns worth mentioning, and a lot of laughs. We held AP's, and already had thoughts about another trip within the coming year.

Perhaps, despite all of that goodness, I was due.

Maybe I'd sublimated my evil-ness so successfully for the week that it was bound to burst forth in an ugly torrent of bile all over the cheerfulness of Old Key West.

Nah, I was just a little peeved. Nothing horrendous happened. In fact, upon learning that we had "missed" our bus (never mind that the 5:10 bus which was allegedly coming would still have us at the airport in plenty of time for our flight) Magical Express immediately dispatched a Mears shuttle to take us to the airport.

I wish I'd been thinking.

I wish I had been clear-headed enough to tell myself, "Waiting here, at Old Key West, with the balmy breezes and the cheerful people and a Turtle Krawl waiting around the corner, will be far superior to waiting at the airport. Where there's nothing but a McDonald's and a Sbarro to keep us occupied."

Instead, we got on the shuttle.

The entire trip to MCO, we stared at the placard on the dashboard which reminded us of our driver's name and how much he'd appreciate a tip.

Here's a tip: I thought Magical Express was supposed to be free? Not my fault they had to call you over here, Mr. Shuttle-man.

Ok, that's not as much a tip as it is a mini-rant. As it also wasn't his fault (unless he was in charge of the letter-writing; I forgot to ask if he was) that he had been called over to rescue us, Mr. Shuttle-man got himself a fat tip. The only bill we had left. A $20. It seemed uncouth to ask for change, so upon arrival at the Southwest terminal we gave him the twenty and called it a day.

"Dinner" at McDonalds, and a bunch of other uneventful stuff later, we boarded our flight for home.

Up next: The horror!

 

[proudmomof4]

Am I first? Yes I am. I am first for the first time ever. WOOHOO!!!

Oh by the way, I have not flown to WDW since the 1970's so I can't relate at all to the ME woes, but I can relate to the sadness of leaving the most MAGICAL vacation spot ever. I hope your next vacation goes as well but with a better ending.

 

[AshClan]

I know this part was tough to write. But I bet you'll do a great "ending" anyway! AND, then you have about 6 other trips to write about, right?! Okay, maybe not six but at least three (counting January....)

Can't wait!!

 

[mmmcq]

Actually, I read your installment last night right when you posted it, but it mad me sadder than I already was all day yesterday - and I just couldn't bring myself to respond. In other words, I absolutely related to your angst.....only I was "in it" yesterday. I loved your update anyway.

I seem to be in slow motion since we got back from WDW. I couldn't get motivated to do anything yesterday and I have soooooo much work to do today in addition to my DD7's post WDW birthday trip - birthday party (what was I thinking???).

I like the way we ended the trip. It just felt right. We left from Candlelight Processional direct to our car at the Beach Club, loaded up the luggage from storage and then headed to Tampa. We stayed overnight at a suite hotel, ordered pizza and watched High School Musical, but were asleep by 10pm.

It's pretty hard to stay in WDW happy mode, however, when you have to get up at 4am to catch your flight home. We were back in Providence by 9:30 am yesterday, happy to walk in the door at home - but we all dragged the rest of the day.

I calmed my self yesterday by surfing DIS and by writing my own mini trip report....not the same kind of page turner as we all love to read...just a short recap of our week. I felt better when I had completed it. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1285162

I didn't go to bed until 1:30am this am and didn't get up until 10am...... I feel like I'm caught in a time warp. I can't even bear to unpack my bags and see all the Disney paraphenelia. Do they sell a WDW specific anti-depressant??????

I've got to get off DIS and get back to my life....... (where's the smilie with the tears when you really need him?)

 

[kpk89]

Aww, mmmcq. I'm sorry you're back in reality again. They DO, in fact, sell a Disney-specific antidepressant. It's called ....































Another trip!

Even if it's FAAAAAAAAAAAR in the future, it helps to be planning another one. Saving the pennies, checking the DIS for new stuff. Chin up, dear. ((hug))

 

[mmmcq]

Very funny Kim. If I even mention the possibility of another trip in the next two years........I'll be run out of town by my DH. He has a 2nd job and he worked last night and has to go in again tonight just to make sure we have enough to pay the bills in a post trip month.

Our vacations are planned all the way through next summer - ski week in NH with another family in February, week at Disney's Hilton Head resort in April and Ireland for two weeks in July with a possible add-on weekend to Paris or London. The latter is a family reunion trip (20 of us - please kill me now) for my in-law's 50th wedding anniverary.

Then my eldest is off to college and we won't be able to afford any Disney trips for a few years. I think 2009 is the earliest we might be back. Again.....I need the smilie with the tears......

Although I'm not telling the whole truth..... My middle DD asked the inevitable question while at WDW last week......."How come the youngest DD gets a birthday at WDW? (It was a whopper of a birthday on 11/20 complete with CRT lunch and Wishes cruise) What about me?". She does turn 16 in March and I did buy an annual pass. So maybe there is a short trip in our future....big girls only. And I have to confess, I do have a studio booked at the BCV for June for my eldest as a graduation present. I'm not sure she's going to want to take another week off in the summer given our family trip in July......so those points will be to be reallocated and used by November 2007.

So we'll see. Thanks for the hugs. And I'm looking forward to your next installment so that I can keep dreaming WDW.

 

[mmmcq]

Oh and this was a funny interlude last night...

While we were eating dinner and my DH was preparing to go off to work - as exhausted as he was....my youngest DD said "Why do you have 2 jobs daddy and mommy has none?" My DH was very diplomatic and said...."mommy has three girls plus me to take care of..." and DD's response was - "well she could work while I'm in school".

Life is so very simple for the wee ones and they are too darn smart! I did not defend myself last night.....but I worked full time until I delivered my 3rd child and I worked part-time for her first two years. But I was wiped from the whole prior 4 years when I had lost both my parents and had a miscarriage in 18 mos and then spent 2 years dealing with my parents complicated and debt ridden estates. My only sister was in complete denial and thwarted my every move. It was an awful period in my life. And finally I realized that I need to step off the wheel. I've been home for 4 years. I am ready to go back to work, but I love my volunteer work - running charity events.

This coming Sunday I'm running Holiday House Tour featuring 6 beautifully decorated homes (done and paid for by the homeowners) which raises our Women's Club about $8-10K/annually that we plow right back into the community in the form of programs and grants. I just can't figure out how to do this for a living........

Off to plan party which is at 5pm. Help me.....

Thanks Kim.....sorry to use your TR as a therapy session. I'm picking up energy today....cleaning of course. I feel much better having read a few DIS threads.......

 

[kpk89]

See, you're doing ok. You have the AP. And you have the thankful thought that the 20 member family reunion is NOT going to be at Disney!

I hope to write again soon, the story of a little adults-only trip in which there are Vikings! Imaginary friends, even!

But first, there is some horror to be gotten through.

 

[kpk89]

On board our 8 PM flight homeward, we were hopeful that the kids would get a little sleep so that we could successfully get them OFF the plane at home and through baggage check and into the car with a minimum of fuss. Other parents on board had the same idea, or so we thought.

If I may digress for a moment ... Everyone here has probably met a competitive mother. One who seems to believe that parenting is a gold-medal event and want to constantly throw out there all the wonderful things they do for their children? Here's the thing: I found this sport particularly prevalent at playgroups and such that I attended with Conor when he was a baby. Where, if we are honest with ourselves, mothers are really going just to connect with other new mothers in order to try and reclaim an iota of sanity after being chucked headfirst into a strange new world of midnight feedings, mustardy poop blowouts and a constant and pervasive odor of sour milk in all of your clothes. If we were honest, we'd admit that we just want to see if we're doing ok at it. The mother thing.

This longing for reassurance, unfortunately, often manifests itself as The Mother Olympics. Pitting breast against bottle, a paying job and daycare against being home full time, cloth against disposable. And on and on. Nobody wants to believe that they are not doing the best possible job for their child, but in fact we all believe we are failing in some respect. If we are honest with ourselves. So we look to our babies to prove us worthy, and mark the milestones in constant comparison to other babies. And we loudly and proudly defend our choices as parents because what other choice is there? Admit that we don't really know what we're doing? Ha! We tear down other moms who have made different choices, because that's the clearest way of all to prove that our own way is best.

Anyway.

What I have learned, being the Meanest Mother in the World, is that we are all doing the best we can. Choices that seemed so important in the early months are nothing compared to what we will face when our babies become teenagers, when they have their own agendas and don't really give a flip about making us look like good mothers. So to all the moms and moms-to-be reading this, do what you want. Do your best. Love your kids with all your heart, and know that at the end of the day, what matters is that your children grow up with your love in their heart, however you manage to put it there.

Digression over. I tell you all of that, so that I can say this.

The Queen of Competitive Mothering was sitting about two rows behind us on this flight.

And I pretty much wanted to kill her.

She was carrying on loud conversations with her toddler child, so that we'd all hear what a clever mommy she was. How interactive. We were all very proud of the QCM and her genius child. They were reading aloud, in two languages! When I say reading aloud, I mean reading LOUDLY. In a very singsong voice.
Twelve times.

Twelve times we got to hear a bilingual adventure undertaken by Dora and her friends. With perfect Spanish pronunciation on the Spanish words, just like the way newscasters do when they talk about Nicaragua. Rolled the "r" and everything.

Give me strength. Give the woman a medal and shut her up. Honestly. We get it! You are a great mom and your kid is a frickin' (NOF) genius. If you want us all to know how great you are, don't resort to these sneaky tactics. Write a trip report and brag about them openly, for goodness sakes. Be up front about it.

At last little Dora went to sleep, and her QCM quieted down.

My kids had zonked out long ago, after their doses of Robitussin.

Just kidding!

Or am I?

All in all, despite the QCM, it was an uneventful, quiet flight. I was glad it was a Friday, so we didn't have to get up in the morning for school or work or facing a day without Mickey. I sort of wished it wasn't Friday the 13th, but if we crashed, at least we were all together.

Stop shuddering. You know you've thought that, too.

We didn't crash, just so you know. We made it back to our home base airport safe and sound, and were even able to awaken the kids to ambulatory status with, as we'd hoped, a minimum of fuss. Lucky break, for Conor. He was not destined to be dropped on his other eye in the aisle of the aircraft. Sporting double shiners on the return from Disney World would have taken some 'splaining.

The in-laws (or, the out-laws, as they like to call themselves) had been in charge of our car all week. They had volunteered to pick us up at the airport. They didn't care that we were arriving after eleven o'clock. They are very nice that way. They love taking people to airports and picking them up.

After a quick stop at the out-laws' house to drop them off, we turned our trusty van toward home. The kids were wide awake again, jabbering about the trip. Debriefing, so to speak. The Disney Magic hung with us until about a mile from our house.

Then it vanished with a POOF.

Or rather, a bleeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh.

Yes, that was the sound of my sweet Sydneyralla, yakking her French fry dinner all over herself, her car seat, and the car.

Oh, the horror.

We were so close to just collapsing in our beds, leaving laundry and unpacking for tomorrow.

Instead, I had to fish my way through the mess to find Sydney's buckles, get her undone and race her up to a warm tubby. Start a load of laundry. Wash chunks out of my baby's hair. While Doug had to hose off the car seat, sanitize the interior of the van (ha! Like it didn't smell bad enough already!) All while holding his nose and covering his mouth. He doesn't "do" vomit. Lucky for me, I just love it.

So that's the way our SuperSecretSurpriseSydneyisSONotFiveYet trip ended. With our very first episode of car zzubing. At midnight, no less.

Sydney in fact did not get better for two full weeks after that. Which was scary, since she was only two at the time. Barely ate anything, and what she did eat did not stick. So to speak.

I'm sure this would have elicited much sympathy from my readers had I been posting about it at the time. Back in May of 2005.

Now, I'm sure you're just cursing me for ruining your lunch. Since Sydney is obviously fine now. Eighteen months later.

I have more to say, in another chapter. An epilogue, if you will. Since that seems to be the thing to do. And it will be vomit-free. Promise. I couldn't leave you this way.

 

[mmmcq]

OMG......how awful for you all and poor Sydney. I promise not to digress....but we pulled up to a very posh Marriott in CT one summer for a long weekend with my sister who came up from NY. Just as we opened the door my then 3 yr old did the same thing. All over everything and everyone. And it was 11pm at night and we were checking into a hotel. Can you imagine the horror on the faces of the valet and guests in the lobby at the time?

It's funny now....but then it was awful. I can only imagine how tired you both were after that episode.

 

[IDoBelieveinFairies!]

I am spellbound already!

Must say like your dedication on trip report