The budget in me is screaming...

[kaytieeldr]

Delta flight 2647 8:30ish AM12/17, 2652 6:50ish PM 12/26. JFK > TPA > JFK about $270 each round trip.

 

[sunshinehighway]

If the biggest issue is the cost of airfare, what about driving?

 

[ellochka]

Say thank you to your brother for picking up most of the tab, and don't worry about the costs. One thing to consider is having too many activities. Yours seems like a busy trip. Unless you two are able to have lots of time with your mom, I would try to dial it down and have an easy pace. Enjoy!

 

[DisneyFoodieFan]

You need to change your attitude about this. If it were me, and my mom was terminal, I would not care if she wanted to vacation in a hole in the desert…I would do what she wanted to show her I love her and to help her carry out her wishes. It's Disney and a cruise…busy or not, spend every second focusing on whether your mom is having a good time, period. We swim every single December we go down there. If your brother is paying, let him. Don't worry about it. Let it go….really.

 

[lauradis]

Oh honey, just let it go and enjoy the smiles, laughing and hug your mom as much as possible.

 

[sookie]

As others have said - this totally isn't about you. Why are you taking this gift of a swift vacation with your mother - who might not be around next year - and tossing it aside?

If you cannot afford to, budget out what it would cost to drive. You eat snacks and other things that can go in a cooler in the car, fast food for a meal or two each day, and DRIVE. Even if it takes two days, the cost of fuel will not compare to your current worries. Stay in a nice motel 6 for cheap.

Look at other avenues - do you have any airline miles saved up? Credit card? Can you cash them out?


We are going to Disney at Christmas this year, and it is turning into a totally different experience for us. One that we probably won't do again, but it will be beautiful. Don't miss out on this.

 

[danygirl]

When my parents were doing chemo they always planned a trip for after. It gave them something to focus on when they were struggling. Perhaps your mom is doing the same

Some things are more important than money

I would pay anything to go on a cruise with my dad this December. But we buried him in Arlington cemetary in December.

Suck up your worries and focus on having a memorable trip

 

[Nztara]

First, I'm sorry to hear about your mom. Please keep in mind that you are going through a VERY emotional time, which possibly makes your feelings and reactions exponentially stronger than they may ordinarily be.

Second, I spent my best friend's final Christmas with her in a hospital room. I would have given anything to be spending it with her at Disney instead of the hospital, but it is still one of my most cherished Chistmas memories. When she passed away three short weeks later, I was grateful for TIME with her. Time is priceless!

Finally, I agree with everyone who has said you have to change the attitude of the trip being a disaster. As difficult as it may be, please think of this as a trip to celebrate your mom and don't sweat the small stuff...and it's ALL small stuff. A crappy meal, a missed FP+ are not tragic things. They are simply part of life....and should be celebrated as time with your mom.

 

[rnorwo1]

I can empathize so much with you because ive been in the exact same postion, with a dying mother and the budget issues!

My mom died of cancer when I was 28, and she wanted to go to San Diego to see the pandas before she died. We had just had our first child and I wasn't working, but it never crossed my mind that we wouldn't bring her. We just did the best we could with DH's overtime and cut corners even more than we usually do. I am super budget conscious, even now that we have decent bank accounts. Spending money when I know I could do it more cheaply drives me insane! But, money was never thought about on the trip, at all, and I didn't have to work to forget about it. Once we were there it was just enjoying her!

I also, just last week, took my MIL to Napa and Sonoma! She has heart disease and wanted to see wine country before she becomes unable to travel. I didn't have to worry about money much, because my FIL paid for the biggest expenses, but I still thought I would be aggravated because we wouldn't be able to travel like my family normally does. But, even with my MIL , I was just happy with her being happy, and I didn't have any moments of regret or worry.

So, hopefully you will be able to focus on the point of the trip, together time, and that will also push those nagging thoughts of money out of your mind naturally. Sending prayers your way for peace about that and to ease this time for your entire family

 

[MrsJackSparrow4Life]

The first thing you need to answer is whether or not you can afford the inflated prices?

If you can afford it, then you need to just get over the difference and try to enjoy your last moments with your mother. You will never be able to get those moments back and years from now the extra money won't even be remembered.

If you can't afford the extra without putting your family's well being in jeopardy, then you need to let your mom and brother know. It would be heart breaking not being able to go but if you can't afford it, you can't afford it.

The rest of your issues really don't make any difference in the long run. You can still have a great time even if the cruise ship is not covered in Disney decorations, there are people all over the parks and the weather is not perfect. Just go in to it with a positive attitude and everything will work out fine. If you go in with a negative attitude, nothing will make you happy and you will ruin everyone's trip not just yours.

 

[ronandannette]

I lost my birth mom when I was very young, my dad was blessed to find another wonderful "mom" for us.

When she was diagnoised with terminal lung cancer from smoking she too wanted a family vacation.

I took out a 5000 loan to go. I do not ever, ever regret spending that week with my entire family.

fast forward to 2012 when I lost my darling husband to leukemia. Ask me or my sons how much money we would give to have one more Disney trip with him what hardship we'd endure.
Most people don't get the chance to spend quality time with a love one who's dying. You do. go make the most of this time

Change your perspective and you'll change how you feel.

Excellent decision. If I'd have had the chance with either of my parents I'd have done the same thing in a heartbeat. My brother is terminally ill right now and although he's not interested in travel (and money's not an issue), we're happily giving up a lot of opportunity and convenience in order to be able to spend the maximum amount of time with him while we can.

 

[Donnainnj]

Op, I am so sorry about your Mom's health. For me planning a trip like this would be filled with so many emotions, it so sucks knowing you are in the process of losing a parent. I lost my Dad last year. We frequently invited Dad to join us on our vacations, (mostly Disney) and now I wish we did it even more often. Unless this trip money is taking food out of your family's mouth, take the trip and know that you are going for the time with your extended family, and to make your Mom's wish come true. Let the rest of it go, you will not regret it.

Donna

 

[gracie1]

My brother recently came into some money and he wants us to do a family vacation. Our mom is really sick with terminal cancer and she is also wanting a family vacation . She has even dreamed of it...I also had a dream of being on vacation and having fun. Its weird we both had that dream. My mom is on chemo now and is in so much pain but she has good days sometimes so were hoping she will have some good days when its time to leave. My brother only vacation days is during Christmas! I want to scream everytime I look at the prices . He has booked a 5 night Carnival cruise for all of us . I always vacation in September...so seeing that were paying four times more for the same thing we can experience much cheaper is driving me bonkers. He wants to do the parks as well...and its going to be so crowded. Were just doing Hollywood Studios because my mom loves Fantasmic and wants to see it one last time and were doing Seaworld because she wants to visit there as well. I just can't get over the prices. He's not paying for our airfare. I just checked the prices leaving jfk to mco for our dates and it was OVER $600 each. I usually fly me and my two kids out for $600 roundtrip total for all 3 of us. This is stressing me out. Its so expensive...everything is going to be crazy crowded . I've never done a carnival cruise but I'm guessing its nothing special . This just has disaster written all over it. I'm not trying to be a debbie downer. I'm just not used to vacationing this way. I always vacation in September. I plan for a year in advance ...I get the best prices...low crowds etc.. this trip is very short noticed,expensive and I'm positive it will be crazy crowded. Oh and the weather is sure to suck....its december we won't be able to swim. Sent from my SPH-M930BST using DISBoards

Budgets can always stress people out. Going in December probably won't be nearly as bad as you think! I've seen many posts where people are able to still swim, wear shorts and t-shirts.
I really think that you feel this has disaster on it and that the trip is going to suck is because it may be the last family vacation with your mom. And you have every right to feel that way. But just think of how much joy this is going to be for your mom!!!!
So sorry for what you are going through. I hope that you enjoy this trip and have fun including your mom in all the planning and getting her excited!

 

[angwill]

It is a free vacation except for airfare and that still has time to come down. It is a free vacation!!!! That is wonderful and a gift. It is a vacation that is for and about your mother and celebrating that she is still with you in December. That is wonderful!!

Having had cancer myself and having lost loved ones to it celebrate her life her way this once no matter what time of year and enjoy it no matter what. It will be a memory to last a lifetime and you don't want bad things clouding that memory. I have been to Disney at different times of year and going at the holiday is a dream of mine. All the beautiful decorations all over the place. What a wonderful gift from your brother.

Start thinking positive now and prepare for lots of people, that you won't let bother you, and prepare for lots of fun and joy. Celebrate your family and the holiday and you will be guaranteed a great time and an even better memory.

 

[xlxo]

Going in December probably won't be nearly as bad as you think! I've seen many posts where people are able to still swim, wear shorts and t-shirts.
I really think that you feel this has disaster on it and that the trip is going to suck is because it may be the last family vacation with your mom.

Here's another thought.... how well does JFK do in late December on average?
http://www.usatoday.com/story/today...-storm-could-snarl-christmas-flights/1779441/

 

[kaytieeldr]

There's no "average". Weather is only slightly more predictable than a disgruntled contract employee starting a fire in Chicao affecting not just those two airports but also dozens of flights around the country.

 

[crisi]

Drive rather than fly. If you have two adult drivers, you can really get it done in one very long day in the car. I just drove Asheville NC to Minneapolis with just one driver in a day - my legs were shaking when I got out of the car, but its doable. (I'm assuming your mother would be flying separately).

The cruise is capacity limited, and you'll have a great time. The parks may be a nightmare over Christmas, but it is what it is.

 

[BlueIvy]

Hi you guys I'm reading through the replies and I appreciate all of your advice. Yesterday me and my brother went through all of the options ...amtrak...bus...rental car etc. He doesn't want to drive. He says its too long. I don't know I still have some time left to convince him. He may just bite the bullet and pay for the Amtrak which will be around $1800 for all of us.

My mom went to the er last night. She's in so much pain. They took new xrays and the cancer is now all over her lower body. Her arm is already broken and so is her collarbone so this is even more upsetting. She's in so much pain she's talking about suicide . I'm so upset because I took a disney cruise with her last year when she was healthy but I was so mad at her that I treated her like crap and made the whole trip miserable now I can't get a repeat . She deserved my disdain at the time but now I just wish I could start all over. I was so mean to her on that trip. I wouldn't eat breakfast with her and I abandoned her in Nassau. I didn't tell her the dining times in hopes she wouldn't show up. I just really hated her at the time.

Financially I can't afford such a high priced last minute vacation. My brother can...but I can't. I told him ill pay as much as I can towards the trip like $700 towards transportation and a motel stay.

Sent from my SPH-M930BST using DISBoards

 

[Marionnette]

Hi you guys I'm reading through the replies and I appreciate all of your advice. Yesterday me and my brother went through all of the options ...amtrak...bus...rental car etc. He doesn't want to drive. He says its too long. I don't know I still have some time left to convince him. He may just bite the bullet and pay for the Amtrak which will be around $1800 for all of us.

My mom went to the er last night. She's in so much pain. They took new xrays and the cancer is now all over her lower body. Her arm is already broken and so is her collarbone so this is even more upsetting. She's in so much pain she's talking about suicide . I'm so upset because I took a disney cruise with her last year when she was healthy but I was so mad at her that I treated her like crap and made the whole trip miserable now I can't get a repeat . She deserved my disdain at the time but now I just wish I could start all over. I was so mean to her on that trip. I wouldn't eat breakfast with her and I abandoned her in Nassau. I didn't tell her the dining times in hopes she wouldn't show up. I just really hated her at the time.

Financially I can't afford such a high priced last minute vacation. My brother can...but I can't. I told him ill pay as much as I can towards the trip like $700 towards transportation and a motel stay.

Sent from my SPH-M930BST using DISBoards

I thought that your brother was paying for everything but your airfare? Maybe I misunderstood your OP.

Regardless of how this vacation would be funded, if your mother is in this kind of agony right now, planning a cruise and tacking on a theme park vacation may not be the wisest choice for spending family time together over the holidays.

You and your brother should discuss what is in the best interest of your mother. Plan your family time around what she will be capable of enjoying and the type of travel that will not exhaust her.

 

[TwoMisfits]

I agree with another poster. If she's in this much pain now, it might be better to plan a very "local" vacation over the Christmas break. Since you are in NY and since you are thinking of a cruise, planning one out of NYC for the winter break might be a better plan than trying Disney. You could even try to get last minute cabins (aka - a price break), but I'm not sure there will be availability at the peak season.