Texting etiquette- parent/child

[wvjules]

The child is obviously a heathen being raised with no manners.

 

[BrianL]

Why do people feel the need to share EVERY aspect of their lives on SM???? OMG, no one cares about these petty things you find "cute".

I hate SM, never had it, never will.

Thank you rant over.

I hate most social media too and have never had Facebook, Twitter, etc. I don't care to use it. Technically, though, the DIS could be considered "social media" though it's kind of an older form of it.

I think the text could have been worded a tad more politely, but, you know, I still type texts with proper capitalization and punctuation, so what do I know? I think it's the "come get me, now" part that seems a little curt.

 

[RangerPooh]

The irony for me is that my ds actually complained that I always respond with just "K"
So, I started texting him back with more formal and ridiculous responses. He has since learned to appreciate the short and sweet LOL

My husband and I will respond to each other with 'K' and people were appalled. Why I have no clue. Nothing else needs to be said. It's short and to the point. My kids do it too and I'm fine with it. At least they received and acknowledged a message.

As for the original post, I get things like that all the time form my kids and even husband. I don't need a long explanations if they're finished and ready to be picked up. Just get to the point. Although punctuation is appreciated.

 

[sksjasams]

I've been texting teens who need rides for 10 plus years. I've often gotten "We're done." Or even "Done" My reply, "OMW." (On my way.) When I arrive, my text is "here".

Yes - same!

The irony for me is that my ds actually complained that I always respond with just "K"

My DS told me that among his friends, a "K" response means you are annoyed. He always spells out okay, occasionally ok. Unless, of course, he is annoyed at me...LOL

 

[wvjules]

I type "ok". DD23 texts "okay". I go for brevity.

 

[Hikergirl]

Yes - same!



My DS told me that among his friends, a "K" response means you are annoyed. He always spells out okay, occasionally ok. Unless, of course, he is annoyed at me...LOL

Ah, maybe that is why. I couldn't imagine why it would bother him especially when he uses text speak himself.
My other kids aren't bothered by it though so maybe he's just a weirdo LOL

 

[LSUmiss]

Sorry, but I'm failing to see the impoliteness on this. Is it because the text didn't say please?

Slightly OT, but I'm pretty tired of all the FB posts that consist of snapshots of text conversations between two people, especially kids and their parents. JMO

Exactly. I think that’s a bigger issue than the content of the text. I’m so over social media. Is nothing private or personal anymore??

 

[gwynne]

So, a friend of mine posted a text convo she had with her 12 year old on fb because she thought it was cute and funny. Part of the convo in the screenshot was her 12 year old son texting to her

“Come get me now, pull to the back and let me know when you get here”

Do people feel like texting is just casual, doesn’t need to include all the niceties and this is perfectly ok? Or should all communication be polite? Do you expect your kids to be polite to you?

I’ve taught my kids to be polite and respectful in all forms of communication. But maybe it’s just me, as my friend posted this without a second thought and no one has commented that he was a little rude or demanding. (My answer to the above text would have been “Try again and use some manners this time”)

I would not assume that just because a young person is sometimes brief and to the point he isn't generally polite.
I absolutely wouldn't scold a 12 yo for a brief and to the point text referencing where I was to pick him up.

 

[Southernmiss]

So I guess I’m the only one out there telling my kids that when they would like me to drop whatever I’m doing and pick them up because they’re done with whatever activity they have been enjoying, they can at least throw a “please” or even a “pls” in there? Because I’m neither their chauffeur nor their servant? Ok.

I’m fine with brevity, I’m not fine with commands or disrespect.

And yes, the convo my friend posted on fb was not particularly cute or funny. Yes, she shares a lot.

Many of us see no disrespect in that post. It was a quick "I'm done." At age 12, I am sure that mom had an idea that the child was involved in that particular activity and would need a ride.

There's a period of time from about age 10 to 16 when I am my kid's chauffeur to and from activities and their "servant" (as you would call it) washing their clothes, cooking, doing their dishes, etc. that's just another aspect of being a mom to me.

I would know about all their activities and practices ahead of time, but may not know the exact end time of that activity and knew that DH or I or maybe an older sibling who could drive would be "on call" for the ride home. A brief text to alert that "it was time" to pick them up was never even questioned as being impolite. It was accepted with a sigh of relief that "Yay! Kid A is done and I can go pick him up and get back home soon." Many a after midnight text from band trips and contests. No one wants to read a paragraph at midnight to look for politeness. Heck, kid was lucky that I was polite in replying with a "K" or a "OMW".

There were also times in my kid's high school career when they were in multiple activities or had a strenuous marching band season and it was all the kid could to do go to school, study, go to the activity, come home, eat, shower and collapse into bed before doing it all again. So yes, I did not mind cooking, doing dishes or washing their clothes for them.

All fabulous kids, not entitled in the least, very appreciative of what their dad and I've done for them and who are succeeding (and still polite to others) in their young adult lives-without me.

Life is too short to worry about the small things.

 

[Floridaman999]

I'm not seeing the problem here.

 

[BadPinkTink]

look sms stands for SHORT MESSAGE SERVICE.

Its quick, short snappy communication, do not expect a novel. yet another dinosaur not getting that communication has evolved from telegrams!

 

[smiths02]

So I guess I’m the only one out there telling my kids that when they would like me to drop whatever I’m doing and pick them up because they’re done with whatever activity they have been enjoying, they can at least throw a “please” or even a “pls” in there? Because I’m neither their chauffeur nor their servant? Ok.

I’m fine with brevity, I’m not fine with commands or disrespect.

And yes, the convo my friend posted on fb was not particularly cute or funny. Yes, she shares a lot.

I wouldn't judge the kid from that since it is out of context and tween boys are exactly known for their flowery prose. However, I have a 12-year-old boy, and, while I wouldn't have punished him, I would have texted back something sarcastic like "thanks, mom" or something.

 

[Hrhpd]

Why do people feel the need to share EVERY aspect of their lives on SM???? OMG, no one cares about these petty things you find "cute".

I hate SM, never had it, never will.

Thank you rant over.

You are on a form or social media right now and you are sharing your cute baby's picture and have shared parts of your life almost 8,000 times.

 

[aprilgail]

I don't see anything wrong with that text- a typical text between me and my daughter would be "Done" and I would reply "k" and if she needed to say where to get her it would be like "round back" and I would reply "k"

 

[wenrob]

So, a friend of mine posted a text convo she had with her 12 year old on fb because she thought it was cute and funny. Part of the convo in the screenshot was her 12 year old son texting to her

“Come get me now, pull to the back and let me know when you get here”

Do people feel like texting is just casual, doesn’t need to include all the niceties and this is perfectly ok? Or should all communication be polite? Do you expect your kids to be polite to you?

I’ve taught my kids to be polite and respectful in all forms of communication. But maybe it’s just me, as my friend posted this without a second thought and no one has commented that he was a little rude or demanding. (My answer to the above text would have been “Try again and use some manners this time”)

We are a “please and thank you” kind of family however, it can bog down an ongoing communication. If we went through all the niceties for every single text when my DD was doing competitions we’d have been late for everything. You said this was a snip of the conversation so you have no idea the context. Mom could have said “Text me when you’re ready and let me know where to pick you up.” She could be driving. She could have requested that he be short and to the point. Both could have been in the middle of something and only able to text the bare minimum. This could simply be their routine. Judging how other people do things never ends well. Don’t worry about what her kid is doing. You do you.

 

[Hrhpd]

So, a friend of mine posted a text convo she had with her 12 year old on fb because she thought it was cute and funny. Part of the convo in the screenshot was her 12 year old son texting to her

“Come get me now, pull to the back and let me know when you get here”

Do people feel like texting is just casual, doesn’t need to include all the niceties and this is perfectly ok? Or should all communication be polite? Do you expect your kids to be polite to you?

I’ve taught my kids to be polite and respectful in all forms of communication. But maybe it’s just me, as my friend posted this without a second thought and no one has commented that he was a little rude or demanding. (My answer to the above text would have been “Try again and use some manners this time”)

Don't see anything wrong. Texting is supposed to be short and to the point. Hopefully the child said "Thanks Mom" when your friend showed up.

The only thing you are going to accomplish by telling your child to try again and use some manners is that your child will deem you an uninformed tech person and will just stop talking to you.

I find it much ruder to post and trash a 12 year old that is not yours on a discussion board.

 

[Hrhpd]

So I guess I’m the only one out there telling my kids that when they would like me to drop whatever I’m doing and pick them up because they’re done with whatever activity they have been enjoying, they can at least throw a “please” or even a “pls” in there? Because I’m neither their chauffeur nor their servant? Ok.

I’m fine with brevity, I’m not fine with commands or disrespect.

And yes, the convo my friend posted on fb was not particularly cute or funny. Yes, she shares a lot.

yet, you are sharing here. Even went to the point of creating a whole thread to share.

For what it is worth, if you do not want to see your friend's posts on Facebook, you can unfollow her. It won't unfriend her, but since her posts annoy you, they won't show up in your feed anymore.

Or, there is always the down arrow button. When you see a post that annoys you, hit it about 4 times and you will scroll right over her post to the next one on your feed.

 

[mom2rtk]

Took me a minute or two - Social Media, I assume

I hate abbreviations too

Is it bad that my first thought was Space Mountain?

 

[aprilgail]

Is it bad that my first thought was Space Mountain?

Well that is better than the SM that came to my mind!!

 

[Nancyg56]

I see nothing wrong with this, and my family is a polite family where manners count. My DGD texts and they are pretty short and to the point. She does not chat on the phone either. Her whole life is efficient, and while her writing skills are stellar when need be, she wastes no time on texting other than what needs to be in the text. I am fine with that, although she usually adds a kiss and heart emoji for me.