Tell me I can do this

[danceintherain]

I don't agree with the suggestion to cancel the trip, because it's 7 months from now. It would take time for the deposit to get refunded, which would do nothing for the current situation. Unfortunately, there's no a lot of advice that can be given from one person to another about spending only $60 on groceries for a month. Only you know what you have on hand, and only you know what you and your family will eat. I can tell you that my brother spent around that much for food in a month while he was in college because all he ate was ramen, spaghetti, and canned food. He pretty much never had anything that had a shelf life of less than a month, except for the occasional loaf of bread. I would have a very hard time eating like that and I certainly wouldn't be able feed my family on it, but it worked for him.

For future reference, it's all in the way you phrase a question. Instead of "I only have $88 to last me for the rest of June for groceries & gas" leave the details entirely out of it and say "I'm trying to be extra frugal this month! I have X in my pantry. Help me figure out how to spend only $60 to make up the difference." While there may be some confusion as to why you only want to spend that much, it's made irrelevant by not including any allusion to the fact. It's much more likely that you'll only get answers of "it can't be done" or "here is my list of budget meals that will use what you have listed with few additions."

In general, it looks like you need carbs - pasta, rice, etc

 

[mdsoccermom]

Like I said...we have our own bills and our own bank accounts. One of the things that was my responsibility (and still is) was groceries. He doesn't make enough money on his own to pay for everything so as half the couple I have financial responsibilities too. How would it be any different if he ran short and came to me to help out with the house note, or electric bill?
And my retirement fund was useless unless I returned to my job, which I didn't plan to. I worked for the state, so when you quit you either withdraw it, or leave it there for when you return. Me drawing it out and using it allowed me to stay home with my daughter for her first 6 months without needing a job. Not everyone has a husband that can afford to make them a SAHM.

I understand separate finances, but most people that have separate money also have joint funds for household expenses. If someone can't feed their family on what they have, and considers asking their husband for grocery money as a bailout, then their system isn't working.

 

[Marionnette]

OP here. To clarify, we are not deciding between food or Disney. DH, the only one in the house currently bringing in a real paycheck, can and will give me more money if I need it but it would be really nice to get through the month without a bailout. Not only will it clear out all the random stuff in the pantry but it means that next month I will have the entire amount (and we are going out of town for 2 weeks next month so most of our meals will be provided). Thanks for all your advice. Looking around the house, I am really thinking that I can do it or come really close. I don't really know what to expect with the gas. We are used to driving 2-3 hours a week for preschool and that ended last week. I just don't know what our new activities are going to be. The end of the school year and nicer weather means we have more playmates within walking distance though so that will help a lot. As far as food, it is mostly the little girls and I that I have to feed so I figure as long as I have some of the favorites available, we'll be fine (they can eat chicken noodle soup, minus the chicken, for literally 3 days straight). So far I need to pick up t.p., milk, peanut butter, spaghetti noodles, chicken broth, eggless noodles (littlest also allergic to eggs), bananas or apples and maybe a little bit of lunchmeat. Summer also means a lot of lunches at the park for us and I haven't yet perfected how to feed the little one, who won't eat bread or tuna, is allergic to eggs and peanut butter. Lunchmeat or at least chunks of chicken or ham is the only thing that I can really think to pack for her. If all else fails with food, the girls would probably eat spaghetti every night if I let them (and we even have a ton of deer sausage to add to it) and I could live on PB & J. It's going to be an adventure. But even if I don't make it the whole month, I'm sure DD and I will at least have fun being creative in the kitchen .

Choosing to feed the children a low-quality diet for a month when you could tell your husband that you need more grocery money is messed up thinking. And it's especially screwed up logic when you have an extremely young child who has very unique and specific dietary needs. You don't play games with the nutritional needs of young children.

 

[disneyjunkie]

If you have a gas gift card, why not use that for gas and use the extra $20 for food?

I can't believe there are so many people encouraging the OP to feed her kids garbage in order to keep the disney dream alive.

Disney isn't closing up.

Cancel the trip, rework the budget and feed the kids.

Crazy, crazy, crazy

 

[punkin]

I think you can eke out one month considering all the food you have in the freezer, the fact that you won't need your car as much, and have a gas card. However, this is not a long-term solution. What will you do next month with an empty freezer and pantry (and they will be empty if you do this month right)? If you are continually short every month, you need to re-evaluate your budget.

If your husband has you on an allowance, it needs to be increased!!! If he has no additional money, you need to cut out things that are unnecessary such as cable, lower your thermostat in the winter...raise it in the summer (or don't air condition at all).

The Disney trip is a sunk cost at this point, and I agree with the poster that it is rude to request a different gift. However, you can tell your mother about your difficulties and maybe she still has time to cancel if she wants to. Last point here...it is not up to your mother to feed your children. She wants to gift a Disney trip they will remember. I get that. Your HUSBAND (and you, if child care can be covered) is RESPONSIBLE for ADEQUATELY feeding your children.

 

[donaldlovesdaisy]

Like I said...we have our own bills and our own bank accounts. One of the things that was my responsibility (and still is) was groceries. He doesn't make enough money on his own to pay for everything so as half the couple I have financial responsibilities too. How would it be any different if he ran short and came to me to help out with the house note, or electric bill?
And my retirement fund was useless unless I returned to my job, which I didn't plan to. I worked for the state, so when you quit you either withdraw it, or leave it there for when you return. Me drawing it out and using it allowed me to stay home with my daughter for her first 6 months without needing a job. Not everyone has a husband that can afford to make them a SAHM.

Sorry but that is not always the case at least it wasn’t for me. I worked for the State of Louisiana and I was able to roll my state retirement (the money that I contributed for 7 years) into a IRA account . I see your tag says Louisiana so I am assuming that is the state you are talking about and wondering why you were not given the same option.

 

[Marionnette]

I think you can eke out one month considering all the food you have in the freezer, the fact that you won't need your car as much, and have a gas card. However, this is not a long-term solution. What will you do next month with an empty freezer and pantry (and they will be empty if you do this month right)? If you are continually short every month, you need to re-evaluate your budget.

If your husband has you on an allowance, it needs to be increased!!! If he has no additional money, you need to cut out things that are unnecessary such as cable, lower your thermostat in the winter...raise it in the summer (or don't air condition at all).

The Disney trip is a sunk cost at this point, and I agree with the poster that it is rude to request a different gift. However, you can tell your mother about your difficulties and maybe she still has time to cancel if she wants to. Last point here...it is not up to your mother to feed your children. She wants to gift a Disney trip they will remember. I get that. Your HUSBAND (and you, if child care can be covered) is RESPONSIBLE for ADEQUATELY feeding your children.

I disagree that the trip cost is sunk at this point. Amtrak reservations can be canceled and refunded. Gift cards can be sold to recoup part of their value. I don't know about the grandmother's timeshare.

And you're correct that a recipient has no right to dictate what a gift-giver should give. However, when the "gift" comes with the burden of additional expenses, it is well within the recipient's rights to respectfully decline the offer when it is unaffordable. Do you really think that any loving grandmother would want to know that her grandkids were being fed an inadequate diet just so they could accompany her to Disney World?

 

[punkin]

I disagree that the trip cost is sunk at this point. Amtrak reservations can be canceled and refunded. Gift cards can be sold to recoup part of their value. I don't know about the grandmother's timeshare.

And you're correct that a recipient has no right to dictate what a gift-giver should give. However, when the "gift" comes with the burden of additional expenses, it is well within the recipient's rights to respectfully decline the offer when it is unaffordable. Do you really think that any loving grandmother would want to know that her grandkids were being fed an inadequate diet just so they could accompany her to Disney World?

No, I don't which is why I suggested OP tell her mother about the food situation. However, once a gift is accepted, it is rude to unilaterally back out of it. I don't know the details of the trip (I don't generally look up posters' other threads...it doesn't interest me) and there may be some sunk costs. At this point it is OP's mother's decision what she wants to do.

In any event, the Disney trip is immaterial. OP is having trouble with her budget EVERY month. The Disney trip is just icing on the cake. She needs a more fundamental change to her budget. She has to be able to take care of her children on an ongoing basis.

 

[nunzia]

Wow..people are really going down a slippery slope here acting like her DH is a troll who wants his kids to starve.
It sounds to me like they have a food/gas budget and OP has been borrowing and playing around with it and wants to even it all out by having a tight month. She has said her DH will give more if needed, but what's the point of a budget if you don't stick to it for the most part? Maybe it will need to be readjusted but right now she is talking about ONE MONTH and she has a great store of stuff in the freezer and I'm guessing other pantry stuff not mentioned. It can be done..and I agree with NOT supplementing with any type of aid.
All those proteins can be stretched, for example the pork chops can easily be made into some stir fries, stew, etc.Great idea for popcorn for snack, also a huge batch of cowboy cookies (light on the chocolate chips heavy on the oatmeal) are good and jello is cheap with some fruit cocktail thrown in. Your daughter's allergies make it tougher but not impossible. If you see it as a game, and really buckle down, you can do it.

 

[la79al]

Reading through this post just confuses me. So feeding my kids stuff like hamburgers with a frozen veggie and baked potato or porkchops with apples is feeding my kids junk and nutritionally depriving them? I was actually thinking that my meals were okay but the snacks were lacking. We have cake and cookie mixes, including a big tub of the frozen cookie dough. We have a huge box of microwave popcorn and a bag of the stuff that goes in the popper. I'm curious now as to what others feed their children, especially the picky ones.
And to those of you that realize a budget only works if you stick to it, thank you. Yes, I know I need a bigger allowance for groceries. I am hoping to make it through June to start July at a 0 balance and evaluate exactly how much more I need.

 

[MSLRAC]

I thought about this thread today when I ran to the grocery store for a few things ~ milk, some fresh fruit, veggies, juice and other misc stuff. I walked out with $60 worth of groceries, which will hold us over until I do the major shopping in a few days.

So, no, you won't be able to last the entire month of June on the money you have.

You and your mother need to be more concerned with feeding your children than taking them on an unnecessary vacation.

I have to agree. I did our big grocery run yesterday and spent $204 just for 2 weeks and I put $75 worth of gas in our Tahoe on the way (our van will get $65 put in it tomorrow). I would honestly be sick to my stomach if we just had $88 in spending money for the month much less living money.

I honestly try not to get involved in threads like this because we've been there (years ago) but the thing is, if the OP is always coming up short and borrowing from next month for this month, the gig is pretty much up at this point because the month has not even really got started and they are essentially out of money.

It's time to get serious about a budget and start cutting out non-essentials. Even if the Disney trip is a gift, I know that my mom would rather her grandkids have full tummies all summer than see Mickey again this year.

 

[jcemom]

Wow..people are really going down a slippery slope here acting like her DH is a troll who wants his kids to starve.
It sounds to me like they have a food/gas budget and OP has been borrowing and playing around with it and wants to even it all out by having a tight month. She has said her DH will give more if needed, but what's the point of a budget if you don't stick to it for the most part? Maybe it will need to be readjusted but right now she is talking about ONE MONTH and she has a great store of stuff in the freezer and I'm guessing other pantry stuff not mentioned. It can be done..and I agree with NOT supplementing with any type of aid.
All those proteins can be stretched, for example the pork chops can easily be made into some stir fries, stew, etc.Great idea for popcorn for snack, also a huge batch of cowboy cookies (light on the chocolate chips heavy on the oatmeal) are good and jello is cheap with some fruit cocktail thrown in. Your daughter's allergies make it tougher but not impossible. If you see it as a game, and really buckle down, you can do it.

This was my take on the situation also!

 

[averysmom]

I couldn't OP - although my kids are a little older and my son eats as an adult already. I also work half an hour out of town, so even with carpooling, I'm spending $200/month in gas.

I think you have a great stockpile though - I think you'll have to really focus on making sure you are looking at your nutrition needs when planning your meals. Just carbs and protein aren't going to get those little girls what they need.

Good luck!

 

[Marionnette]

Reading through this post just confuses me. So feeding my kids stuff like hamburgers with a frozen veggie and baked potato or porkchops with apples is feeding my kids junk and nutritionally depriving them? I was actually thinking that my meals were okay but the snacks were lacking. We have cake and cookie mixes, including a big tub of the frozen cookie dough. We have a huge box of microwave popcorn and a bag of the stuff that goes in the popper. I'm curious now as to what others feed their children, especially the picky ones.
And to those of you that realize a budget only works if you stick to it, thank you. Yes, I know I need a bigger allowance for groceries. I am hoping to make it through June to start July at a 0 balance and evaluate exactly how much more I need.

Maybe it's because those menus are okay in moderation but an entire month planned around ground meats and pasta is not. Where are the leafy green vegetables? The low-fat proteins? You shouldn't feed popcorn to a 1-year old. Cakes and cookies are desserts and not an appropriate snack.

How does a 1-year-old become a picky eater? My kids had preferences but they were not allowed to be picky eaters. They got the same thing on their plate that my husband and I ate. And we certainly were not about to live on chicken nuggets and fish sticks just because the kids preferred them to a skillet stir fry or pan-seared cod fillets.

Yes, you need to re-work your budget and you need more money for groceries. The cost of food has skyrocketed over the past year and we have all needed to change our budgets to accommodate that fact. But in the meantime, you need to let your husband know that you barely have money for gas and groceries for the month.

 

[rantnnravin]

First: I would inventory EVERYTHING in your pantry and begin matching up what can be made with what in the most healthy way. Then figure out what you will need to buy to fill in and supplement.
Your best bet will be SOUPS...STEWS...and SAUCES
DBF is a super health nut, soooo....
With the stockpile of meat the you have, you can make loads of super healthy soups stews and sauces using ingredients such as a couple cans of goya beans, fresh Kale or fresh spinach, a container of broth, a bag of mixed veggies, lentils, pasta, an Alessi soup starter (or Christmas Tree Shops sells a really great soup starter for like $1 a package) Everything goes into a huge spaghetti pot and then stored in chinese soup containers (we get about 6-8 containers per pot) They tend to thicken up, so they can be cut down with water, thereby stretching them even further. They are super-hearty as well as super-healthy.
-I agree that WATER is the healthiest beverage one can drink - it is what our bodies need the most.
-At most grocery stores, the produce manager will set aside items that are almost past their prime at an awesomely reduce price. They tend to last a few days to a week and can be used as healthy snacks and/or in soups and stews or the fruits can be blended into deliciously healthy smoothies.
-baked, or grilled potatoes can make a great filler as well as a great healthy snack

lunchmeat is a major expense - try to stick to what you have (if you have steaks, cook and slice them up, etc)
use the meats to make salads too (pasta salads, chicken salad, etc)
instead of mayo, use hummus -you can even make your own to save some $$-
snacks like fresh carrots (not convenience cut), cheese cubes?, celery sticks?, cheerios?
i hope this helps - even if to jumpstart your imagination.

 

[morethananyonex]

I think it's disgusting the lengths people will go to (and encourage people to go to) to go to Disney. Not surprised all the people encouraging this have trip countdowns in their signatures. Feed your kids properly, or get your husband to "bail" you out so his children can eat properly.

I find it a little funny that people posting on a budget board really have no concept of how to properly budget. Vacations do not take priority over groceries (maybe they do if they're Disney vacations...).

 

[ilovemk76]

I think it's disgusting the lengths people will go to (and encourage people to go to) to go to Disney. Not surprised all the people encouraging this have trip countdowns in their signatures. Feed your kids properly, or get your husband to "bail" you out so his children can eat properly.

I find it a little funny that people posting on a budget board really have no concept of how to properly budget. Vacations do not take priority over groceries (maybe they do if they're Disney vacations...).

 

[averysmom]

Maybe it's because those menus are okay in moderation but an entire month planned around ground meats and pasta is not. Where are the leafy green vegetables? The low-fat proteins? You shouldn't feed popcorn to a 1-year old. Cakes and cookies are desserts and not an appropriate snack.

How does a 1-year-old become a picky eater? My kids had preferences but they were not allowed to be picky eaters. They got the same thing on their plate that my husband and I ate. And we certainly were not about to live on chicken nuggets and fish sticks just because the kids preferred them to a skillet stir fry or pan-seared cod fillets.

Yes, you need to re-work your budget and you need more money for groceries. The cost of food has skyrocketed over the past year and we have all needed to change our budgets to accommodate that fact. But in the meantime, you need to let your husband know that you barely have money for gas and groceries for the month.

I'm assuming OP was looking for legit. help... I teach a foods and nutrition unit in my course, so I'm just using links that I know are available - so they are Canadian, but I'm fairly sure that Canadian and American food guides are similar, if not the same.

This is a link to overall nutrition tips and needs for children:
http://www.hc-sc.gc.ca/fn-an/food-guide-aliment/choose-choix/advice-conseil/child-enfant-eng.php

And here is a link to a "sample" menu for a 3 year old for the day (it does contain dairy, though... I'll see if I can pull up a menu that is dairy free) ETA: all I could find is replace milk with soy and almond milk, and increase calcium rich foods, such as leafy greens, broccoli, okra, bok choy, seeds and nuts (which she can't eat yet) and OJ with added calcium. Your 1 year old needs 500 mg of calcium a day for bones and teeth... your 4 year old 800 mg.

http://www.hc-sc.gc.ca/fn-an/food-guide-aliment/choose-choix/advice-conseil/child-enfant_wide-eng.php

And this is a link of general healthy meal ideas:
http://www.hc-sc.gc.ca/fn-an/food-guide-aliment/using-utiliser/suggestions-eng.php

Hope this helps!

 

[MSLRAC]

I think it's disgusting the lengths people will go to (and encourage people to go to) to go to Disney. Not surprised all the people encouraging this have trip countdowns in their signatures. Feed your kids properly, or get your husband to "bail" you out so his children can eat properly.

I find it a little funny that people posting on a budget board really have no concept of how to properly budget. Vacations do not take priority over groceries (maybe they do if they're Disney vacations...).

I have to agree! We were honestly talking last night about moving our Nov trip to Feb because it is eating into our monthly spending money too much. That trip would be cancelled in a heartbeat if it started eating through that money and into our food, fuel or bill money. WDW is not going anywhere and I just do not see breaking any part of our budget (especially food for the kids) to get there.

 

[hsmamato2]

a lot of posts here make me sad.....1st there's OP who doesn't have enough money EVERY MONTH to make her own budget,and is out of $$$ by the 2nd day already....and has a DH who feels that feeding his kids would be a 'bailout'.
There are pp's here whose spouses force them to feed the family,regardless of whether thay have an income or not.
What ever happened to partnerships,where both parents work together to pool their money,and feed the family?
What kind of world is this where a vacation could be planned,yet the budget is so low that it is continually a source of stress?Or where one parent feels like they have to ask for more 'allowance' so the kids don't go hungry? I don't get it.
****That said, OP, you have plenty of stockpiled food, and with the addition of some frozen spinach,broccoli,etc, you could make a month's worth of stirfries,soups,and sandwiches. Snacks can be homemade,and you need to go over you past few months spending,and see where your money has been going. Just don't drive anywhere.